“Bring me that obnoxious prince please, Amisha.”
The tiger chuffed, rose to her paws, and tugged on Ethan’s leash. He followed with a grin plastered onto his face. “This is the strangest thing I’ve ever done, and I love it.”
“Stranger than wanting a New Yorker?”
His Royal Majesty of Montana laughed. “She’s got a point, and I’m married to a New Yorker. You’re going to have your hands full with her, but I suspect you’ve already figured that out.”
“We really should introduce her to the congress. I want to see their faces, but she doesn’t want to be introduced.”
“I’ll take care of it.” His Royal Majesty of Montana released my hand, patted my shoulder, and headed to the table burdened with my condom collection. He perched on the edge, checking each of the boxes. He held up one of the boxes, which contained the small, glowing condoms. “We, as a society, make jokes about toxic things glowing in the dark. We also make jokes about incompetent men. It seems Rachel has some thoughts about the type of men who would try to force someone into an unwanted marriage. I believe she views you as a toxic threat to Ethan. She is not wrong. Any opinions you have about who he should marry are now invalid. Empathic bonds are valued in this kingdom, and His Royal Highness has shown every symptom of a bonded empath. Furthermore, We have been given signed statements from a royal physician confirming the probable bond. This is an ultimatum issued by both His and Her Royal Majesties of California and myself. Should this congress decide to push the matter, I will escalate it to the entirety of the Royal States. And yes, that is an option, and it’s an option I am confident will be voted on in my favor rather than yours.”
His Royal Majesty of Montana dropped the box of condoms onto the pile, and with a chuckle, he picked up the feather duster. He brushed the condom boxes with it. “This is the most effective weapon in her bag of tricks, truth be told. She’s about to clean house. She’s going to leave chaos in her wake. That is what New Yorkers do when pushed into a corner. Here is what’s going to happen. You will hold your peace until tomorrow, which is when your king and queen will introduce the new heir. You can harass him about marriage if you’d like, but I recommend against it. You may find yourself running out of eligible princes willing to put up with your toxicity regarding marriage.”
The silence remained, and every member of the congress waited. Their expressions ranged from shocked to dismayed, with a few satisfied mixed in for good measure.
I’d ask Ethan about those politicians later. We might need their support once we went to New York.
The inevitability of the whole situation disgusted me.
“His Royal Highness, upon marriage, will no longer be a viable heir for California. But this isn’t a bad thing for you. Here’s why. It’s my pleasure to introduce to you Her Royal Highness, Rachel of New York. Upon marriage to Ethan, she has the right to claim His Royal Highness to be her consort and king; California has three trained, qualified young men willing and able to take over Prince Ethan’s duties. New York has chosen Her Royal Highness, and this is not up for challenge or negotiation. Now, before you get upset with me for this edict, I played no part in this decision. I’m merely ensuring the decision is upheld.”
I loved the silence and everything the congress communicated without a word. According to the expressions of the gathered men and women, they’d been taken completely off guard.
Ethan smiled at me, and he held my hand. “I’ve loved you since I first saw you, and if I could change anything, I would’ve said so from the start.”
“We’re here now because you didn’t then,” I replied. “I don’t think the congress is interested in romance. They care about uteruses open for business, though. Also, I’m going to be taking all those condoms back to New York. If I can’t light my parents on fire, I’ll fling condoms at them.”
“Whatever makes you happy, Rachel. If you’d like to fling condoms at a king and queen, I’m certainly not going to stop you. Hell, I’ll even buy more so you don’t run out of ammunition.”
“I don’t think that’ll be necessary, Your Highnesses,” His Royal Majesty of Montana said. “I’m going to make this simple. The measure up for vote is your approval of their marriage, to be performed here and now. I want this to be done in no more than ten minutes. If you see a reason to deny this marriage, stand up and speak now, but be aware Rachel of New York is a very skilled flameweaver, and she has been under a great deal of psychological strain. At the very minimum, I expect your toupees will be in dire need of replacement before she’s finished with you.”
“I can’t believe my dislike of toupees is already common knowledge.”
“Dr. Stanton warned me you would target toupees ruthlessly should your plan to marry Ethan be interrupted. I’m preventing you from dealing with her wrath later, as she’ll be very displeased if you have to exercise your talent.”
“Well, I’m going to if my idiot parents seriously try to put out a wildfire of that scale.” The truth pissed me off. “Actually, should they try, they’ll probably immolate, but they might take the wildfire out with them when they go.”
I’d seen that bitter truth with my brother. Once he’d burned, his rogue magic had snuffed out every source of flame nearby.
I still didn’t understand why, and when I’d asked, I’d been told that was just what happened.
“I’d rather prevent that from happening, but it’s a possibility. The situation in New York has gotten rather dire for them. They are prideful people. This…” His Royal Majesty of Montana shrugged.
While it was my first time meeting with the man in person, he hadn’t seemed like the type to shy away from difficult things.
I supposed even the Monster of Montana had a heart that hurt at the thought of unnecessary deaths—even the deaths of people like my parents.
“This would be an easy and honorable way out for them, and they might be remembered as martyrs rather than cowards.” I’d spent years shying away from difficult things, running from kingdom to kingdom hiding from the consequences of my sister’s actions. “Not like my sister is remembered.”
Not that she was remembered, not by anyone other than me.
“What happened with your sister is the shame of the Royal States as a whole. She was a symptom of the illness that has infected the entire political system for years. That you are having to go to desperate measures for a chance to choose what should be your right by default is only yet another symptom of that same illness. Change has come to a few kingdoms, and mine is one of them, but it was purchased at a terrible price. Your sister’s life is part of that price. My wife’s life almost became part of the price, too. My daughter, in her way, also paid prices for those freedoms. Her betrothal became a showcase piece to many kingdoms. To ensure her choice, I had to participate and, in a way, continue to promote the illness sickening our politicians and royalty. Except I changed one critical thing.”
“You gave them an out. If it wasn’t a marriage they wanted, they could cancel it at any time without anyone’s permission. The choice was ultimately theirs despite the paperwork playing to the standards of the Royal States,” I replied. I’d remembered wondering about the odd betrothal, which had no benefits for the parents of the agreement and many benefits for the marrying couple. “I remember thinking the terms were strange. That was the last time I seriously followed politics,” I admitted.
“You haven’t missed much.”
“That’s something. Sylvia made her own choices. I will make mine, and I won’t allow this congress to make my choices for me. They’re not marrying Ethan. I am. If they want to marry Ethan, I’ll fight them over it. I won’t fight fair, either.”
“I expect nothing less from a New Yorker. You’re correct. As soon as your documentation is finalized, His and Her Majesties of California will be presenting the documentation to the Royal States publicly to ensure that this congress never again has the authority to abuse young men and women and force them into unwanted marria
ges. It is better for a line to die out than it is to force someone to wed outside of their wishes. Magic isn’t everything, and this congress would do well to remember that.” Montana’s king turned his attention to the congress. “It’s worth mentioning that there is nothing but benefits to swallowing your pride and allowing this arrangement without any interference on your part. If you want to establish a solid relationship with New York, now is the time. Sometimes, diplomacy is pretty words. Others, it’s not obstructing a couple any further than you’ve already done. I expect things would be much different between California and New York right now had the prince and princess of these kingdoms been allowed to be individuals rather than the pawns of royalty and politicians.”
Once again, the silence reigned.
I expected it would be the first and last time I’d see an entire congress rendered speechless. It left a bitter taste in my mouth.
It shouldn’t have been for something as basic as allowing people to marry who they wanted for whatever reason they wanted.
“Excellent. Also, there are some preparations we need to consider regarding His and Her Majesties of New York. I apologize for this, Rachel, but this is part of my job.”
“The succession, in case they die attempting to handle the wildfire.” I shook my head. “No, the chances of them suiciding are high, really.”
I wanted to crawl home, cuddle with my rats, and hide under my bed, but I’d handle the situation as though I was a responsible adult. A princess, even.
Fuck, I hated the circumstances of my birth sometimes.
“Yes, they are. It’s entirely probable that they will. It is the best solution for them. Not for you. No, this is likely an unmitigated disaster in your eyes. And while their intentions aren’t intended to benefit New York, it would resolve many of your kingdom’s internal issues. California has some decisions to make regarding how to handle the potential deaths of two monarchs.”
“We already have a contingency plan,” Ethan’s father announced. “We began working on it when we received word New York was coming to ‘evaluate the wildfire situation personally.’ We understood they meant to get to Rachel. It also occurred to us, considering the political situation in New York, they might view our wildfire situation as an easy out. They would end their reign as celebrated martyrs rather than enemies of their people. They would also dodge the fallout of your situation and your transition to New York as its queen. My apologies, Your Royal Highness, but it was obvious to anyone looking that you had come to our kingdom when the RPS files on your situation began updating. All they had to do was reference Dr. Stanton’s location to figure out the specifics.”
I shrugged. “I was warned it wasn’t really feasible to keep my presence here hidden for long.”
“You pulled it off for years. This is something you should be proud of. You’ve proven you’re a resourceful woman with unparalleled intellect. Your mental health situation will be addressed appropriately from this point forward, and I assure you Ethan’s tested empathic bond will also be addressed.”
California’s king stared at the pile of condoms littering the desk in front of him, and he shrugged. “I expect some problems will be easier to address than others.”
Ethan smirked.
California’s queen rose from her seat, circled the desk, and sifted through the boxes of condoms until she found one she liked, which claimed it was meant for small sizes and lacked any of the novelty flourishes. She held it up. “I think this is fairly representative of the members of this congress at current. Small, petty, and unadorned. You have, since the day my son turned eighteen, been pressuring him weekly to pick a bride meeting your standards. You cared nothing for the young man who will one day rule—not over us, not now, because of your unfortunate meddling, but over New York. You have cost this kingdom an heir. You have cost my son years of his life, a life he may have been able to spend happy with a partner of his choosing. Why do I say that? I say that because, from the day he was confirmed to be California’s next king, you have drilled it into his head that only a princess of your standards would be suitable. You began this campaign much earlier, so do not even attempt to deny it. Your actions also cost Rachel. Had Ethan been encouraged to pick someone who fit well with him, I expect he would have come to me when he first saw the one princess he’d been told he couldn’t have and loved regardless. Had you kept your foolish, childish, and petty beliefs out of the royal family’s marital affairs, we would have had a New York princess and all she brings with her as our future queen rather than their future queen.”
Ethan’s mother dropped the box of condoms, and she crushed it beneath the heel of her shoe. It crunched, and many of the men in the congress winced.
I needed to remember a box of condoms could become a potent weapon in the right hands and beneath the right foot.
“I can hear your arguments now. We have listened to them time and time again. What value is a New York princess outside of wealth?” The queen pointed at me. “That woman has more heart than all of you combined. Following the confirmation of Ethan’s right to wed the woman he wishes, We are invoking California’s clause to close this congress until further notice. We will begin an election for all levels of governance following a period of mourning for New York, should today go as expected. As you leave, I recommend you take a close look at my son. Tonight, it is likely he will become the king you desired, but for a different kingdom. Consider what you have cost us with your desire for him to wed of your choosing rather than his. And consider, in all your machinations, if your scheming has won California anything at all. I assure you it has not. I recommend those of you who are unwilling to bend to the new standards of the Royal States quietly retire and enjoy your golden years. It is time for the next generation to take the reins of this congress. There is no room here for old, harmful traditions.”
“Witnessed,” His Royal Majesty of Montana proclaimed. “Should any wish to bar the union between His Royal Highness of California and Her Royal Highness of New York, speak now.”
Silence reigned.
There were no actual vows, not like I’d witnessed in Illinois. Marriage, by law, consisted of a single sheet of paper, five signatures, and some general confirmation of vital statistics, including our birth certificates.
His Royal Majesty of Montana had mine, and while I wondered how he’d gotten it, I lacked the courage to ask. Ethan’s parents came armed with his, and they couldn’t hand it over to Montana’s king quickly enough. If I hadn’t known better, they believed the paper might catch on fire if they held onto it for too long.
In place of vows, we got a ten-minute lecture about what we were getting ourselves into, a reminder both California and New York essentially barred royalty from divorcing, and that signing would make our living arrangements quite permanent.
Ethan eyed the king’s pen, and if he fidgeted much more, I’d put some serious thought into stepping on his feet to keep him still.
“I don’t think Ethan’s going to change his mind, and I believe he’s becoming impatient,” I said, daring to do what Ethan hadn’t. I claimed the pen, gave it a rebellious click, and gestured for the man to hurry it up. “I’d rather be finished here so if possible, I prevent my idiot parents from following through with their asinine plan. The likelihood they die and make the fire worse is about as equal as them dying and the fire snuffing itself out.”
Montana’s king sighed. “However much I wish circumstances were different, I’m no fool. They value their pride far more than their lives, and they’ve lost what they crave most.”
I could think of a few things my parents craved, power and wealth among them. “That killed my sister, too.”
“What happened to your sister is a tragedy, but it was one of her own making. No doubt, her upbringing factored into everything that happened, but it’s important you remember you are a product of that same upbringing. She played her part.” Montana’s king sighed. “I played mine, too. But ultimately, she made the choices that ul
timately destroyed her. Just like you made decisions that won you Ethan.”
“I’m really not sure he’s winning anything out of this deal,” I muttered.
“You’re so getting two shopping trips added for that one.” Ethan snatched the pen out of my hand and slapped his hand to the paper, scribbling his signature on the appropriate line. “The faster you sign, the better the odds are we can stop the inevitable.”
I reclaimed the pen, shaking my head at the oddities of life. Frowning, I regarded the blank space. “Your Majesty?”
“Yes, Rachel?”
“Exactly which name am I supposed to sign this under? I have two.”
Ethan exhaled. “Well, that just cut a few years off my lifespan.”
Montana’s king chuckled. “Unfortunately for you, Ambrose. Fortunately for you, as the documentation is being signed here, you two can bicker over which last name you take.”
“Please take mine,” Ethan begged. “While I’d take yours if absolutely required, I think we’ll both be happier if you’re an Edderson.”
“My family didn’t make very good gods, did we?”
“Only a New Yorker would attempt to obtain divinity by naming themselves after a mythical essence capable of transforming men into gods. And I’m not even sure that’s actually how the myth goes.”
“I think it was more along the lines of the fountain of youth, but I never really looked into it all that much,” I admitted. I shrugged, clicked the pen a few times, and then signed. “I guess that leaves witnesses.”
“That would be His and Her Majesties of California, and I’ll sign as the overseer of the signing.”
“I will never forgive you if you don’t sign,” Ethan warned.
His mother snorted. “I didn’t stay up all night to bail out of signing at this point. If I didn’t want you to become a New Yorker, I would’ve opened my mouth yesterday. I also wouldn’t have gone out of my way trying to feed your princess. You’ll have your work cut out for you on that score.”
Cold Flame Page 30