When I hopped up the concrete steps that led to their front door, I could hear my brother Jack yelling at the top of his lungs, “Turn that shit down!”
This was followed by the music being lowered to a normal volume. Then Avery could be heard clear as a bell from their front room with the windows open dressing down my brother for the millionth time about his cursing.
“Honey, please they’re like little sponges. When I picked up the girls at daycare last week, their teacher told me that when they want to go to the bathroom, they say, ‘I need the crapper.’ So please be mindful of what you say around them.”
I was still laughing when I finally rang the doorbell to their house. Then like a stampede of baby cattle, my nieces could be heard running towards the door. They were already shouting out my name over and over again before the door was opened.
“Uncle Max is here! Uncle Max is here!”
They were jumping for joy at my arrival. God, how awesome would it be if everywhere I went people would jump for joy because I showed up? Yeah, that’d be pretty cool. Until then, I’d have to settle for my nieces being super excited to see me.
They seemed to be so hopped up on sugar or something, because they wouldn’t stop bouncing up and down like jumping jellybeans. So I bent down and scooped them up, one in each arm and carried them further into the foyer, closing the door behind me with my foot.
“Yay! We’re flying!” one of them yelled. Followed by the other one shouting, “More, higher, Uncle Max!”
I had been adjusting my grip to pull the twins up to my shoulders when Avery turned the corner and came into view. “Ladies, what did I tell you about letting Uncle Max walk completely inside the house before climbing all over him like a tree?”
Whichever one of them was slung under my right arm, answered, “I don’t know, my brain is upside down, Mommy.”
Then the one under my left arm chimed in with, “Mommy, I can rhyme things with brain. Same, name, pain, lame—”
“Very good, Annabelle,” Avery praised. “And if Uncle Max would be so kind as to put you both down on your feet, we can get on with brunch.”
I knew better than to ask if they were waiting on me to eat, because of course they were. And of course I was the last one to arrive, because I always was the last one to arrive. Just like I was always the first one to leave. The best thing about having fun with my nieces was being able to leave and go to my place afterwards.
Setting my nieces down carefully in front of me, they both had to brush their long dark brown hair off of their faces to actually see me. I was surprised at how much it had grown since I last saw them. To the point that if they tried hard enough, they could probably audition for the role of Rapunzel sooner than later.
“Come on, Uncle Max, everyone’s waiting for you,” Annabelle said.
“Yeah, you’re late, Uncle Max,” Isabelle added.
“You’re not late, Max,” Avery said, coming closer and reaching up on her tiptoes to give me a kiss hello on the cheek. “You’re right on time.”
I could feel a tug on my left. Looking down, I found Isabelle holding onto the sleeve of my jacket, her big brown eyes full of wonder at how tall I must seem to her. My nieces sometimes had a way of making me feel like the ruler of the Lilliputians with how tiny they were. I had an inkling that the older and bigger they got, I would think of them as little people no matter what.
“Daddy and Uncle Trevor said you’re stupid late,” Isabelle said.
Annabelle reached across me and smacked Isabelle’s hand. “You’re a tattle tale! I’m going to tell Daddy and Uncle Trevor!”
She ran off before Isabelle could retaliate. But as Isabelle started to run after her, she yelled, “You’re a tattle tale too!”
Avery and I were left in the foyer in blessed silence. “The sweet sounds of silence,” I said to her and she smiled faintly.
“One day, Max, you’re going to realize that that sound of kids losing their minds, is the best sound there is.”
“Avery, you poor thing. You’ve obviously lost your mind,” I said and she laughed a little. Peeking carefully around the corner of the foyer into their family room, I asked in a whisper, “Are the parentals here?”
“No, they couldn’t make it this time. They had some fruit delivered though, which was nice.”
My parents…I wouldn’t even know where to start with them. They were the most self-centered, snobby pair of people I had ever met. They basically couldn’t give a fuck about any of us. Actually it worked out that they barely showed themselves anymore. They made us all feel uncomfortable. Except for Avery. My parent’s lack of respect, lack of humility, lack of manners, and overall lack of human kindness towards Avery never seemed to bother her. I always thought that they would have preferred to see Jack marry someone who had money as their middle name or it was just that they were that much of a couple of stuck-up assholes. Either way, they would not be missed by anyone here today I bet.
“Where’s the bacon?” I asked at the threshold of the kitchen.
“What’s up, jackass,” came from Trevor at the same time Jack answered with, “Hey loser.”
“Hi, Max.” Veronica came over and gave me a kiss hello on the cheek. More than I could say for my own brothers, who went back to talking to each other while prepping some food. She looked me over with a furrowed brow and then asked, “You look tired? Were you out again last night?”
“No, not last night. I’m actually heading out later tonight, though, to some new place in Chelsea to film a segment.”
“Oh, my old neck of the woods. Maybe I can get your brother to take me out for a little bit and we’ll come meet you.” She called out to get Trevor’s attention. “Hey Trev, Max is taping a segment tonight by my old apartment at...wait, what’s the name of the place, Max?”
Instantly, I knew that it would be a bad idea in case Daphne did show up tonight. Last thing I needed was Trevor being himself and making my life miserable in front of anyone, much less someone who I needed working with me, not against me.
“I don’t know the name of the club off the top of my head, but I can text it to you later,” I lied having not even one half of an iota of an intention in me to do any of that. “So what the fuck is going on around here today? Anything exciting?”
“Max, please,” Avery warned in a motherly voice.
“What? The girls aren’t even in here.” Looking around the big kitchen to make sure, I asked Jack, “Are we at least having real food today? None of that vegan bullshit, right?”
“Max, how many times do we have to go over this, man? Whatever the wife wants, the wife gets. And if she wants some vegan food, then guess what?”
“I guess that means that the rest of us are shit out of luck then.”
“No, that’s not what it means, smart ass—sorry honey, but he just gets the better of me every single time.” Jack was exasperated with me in general, already, and I had only been there a few minutes. And then if you tacked on the whole trying not to curse thing, I could tell that he was losing whatever little patience he had left in him. He ran a hand through his hair and sighed so loudly, I was certain that the neighbors heard him. “It means I make some food for my wife and some for everyone else like usual. And yes, before you open up that stupid mouth of yours to complain again, I’m making bacon just for you.”
“It’s not like I’m the only one who likes bacon,” I grumbled. “Jeez, everyone needs to fucking relax around here.”
“That’s your third warning, Max,” Avery said with a motherly soft tone, gliding around the kitchen island with grace. She didn’t even bat an eyelash when she told me, “If I have to put you in time out, I will.”
Everyone started to laugh. So did I because I couldn’t even get annoyed or mad at her little warning. She was that nice and cool, and I knew her heart was in the right place. Plus, Avery was the closest thing I had in my life to what a real mom was supposed to be. She mother henned all of us a little bit here and there. And Jack
, yeah, I gave him shit over how pussy whipped he was most of the time. But the truth of it was that they were perfect for each other and they were raising two amazing kids who I adored. So I could cut Avery some slack. Don’t get me wrong; I still loved to annoy her sometimes like I did with my brothers. But that’s the way I was with my family. And plus, they usually dished that shit right back at me anyways so it was even in the end.
“Stop being such a dick,” Trevor said as soon as Avery turned a corner to check on the girls. “What crawled up your ass and died today?”
“Just stressed with work. And I’m not being any more of a dick than I usually am.”
“So there’s an actual limit of dickiness that you measure yourself against every day?” he asked.
“No, that’s not what I meant. Never mind.”
“Dude, seriously, what is up with you?” Jack asked. “You know I can’t even fucking curse in my own house. Why the fuck do you come in here all cocky and shit thinking my wife is going to let you get away with it?”
“You just cursed,” I told him.
“Yes, and that’s because,” he cut himself from saying anything else. Jack looked around the kitchen, over each of his shoulders, and then went to poke his head in the walk-in pantry to make sure Avery wasn’t hiding anywhere. Veronica and Trevor were trying not to laugh, but she started to giggle and then he followed right behind her. Jack went on in a whisper, “It’s because she’s not here to hear me. Pick your battles, man. You’ll learn as soon you fall in love and have to make some sacrifices.”
It was my turn to laugh hysterically.
The thought of making sacrifices, sure, I got that. Because it made total sense that’s what a true partnership was…and a good marriage like Jack and Avery’s was like that. But the idea that I would be falling in love with any woman, ever, was so spectacularly funny to me. It just wasn’t something I wanted or needed for that matter. I loved my life the way it was. There would be no sacrifices from me, if I had anything to say about it.
Later, after brunch was served and we were full up to our ears with good food, and I was about to leave, Avery approached me one last time.
“Get some rest and take care of yourself, Max.” She reached up to kiss my goodbye.
“Are you saying that as my sister-in-law or as a doctor?” I teased.
“I’m not a doctor, but close enough so my safe answer is, I’m saying it as both your sister-in-law and a nurse practitioner. And promise you’ll come by and visit more often, the girls love seeing you.”
“I promise,” I told her with a smile that I could feel spreading across my face like a rash.See, I could never be mad at my sister-in-law. She was the most genuine and nicest person I’ve ever met. Made me wonder what she saw in my brother Jack. But I knew better than to even joke around with that kind of question to her.
One day, maybe I’ll be that lucky, I thought to myself as I walking out of their house and down their concrete steps.
And then I laughed and laughed, because who was I kidding.
“Girl, I can’t wait until you’re famous.”
This came from Derek, who I asked to be my wingman when I met up with Max tonight. I was already regretting that decision because he was in complete and total lust with Max. From the moment he laid eyes on him in the coffeehouse yesterday, he wouldn’t stop going on and on about how gorgeous and sexy Max was; how perfect his hair was, and of all things, how straight Max’s teeth were. Like who the hell noticed someone’s teeth like that? It was super creepy. But not as creepy and gross as how Derek started strategizing how a power bottom like himself would go to town on Max’s ass. It was very confusing and very, very detailed and way too much information than I ever needed to know about Derek’s sex life, thank you very much.
The subway rides here to Chelsea from Queens were full of commentary from Derek about how he was going to seduce Max. And I quote, “That hot piece of ass won’t know what him.”
I had tried to convince him how straight Max was, but he wasn’t having any of it. Oh well, I’d let him crash and burn now if that’s how he wanted to play it.
We were walking up West Eighteenth Street, nearing one of the ends of The High Line when I turned to Derek, who was dressed like he was auditioning to be a stand-in for The Village People. “Derek, is there a reason why you’re wearing leather pants?”
He grinned wickedly as he glanced down at himself. “Why? You don’t like them?”
“Eh, they’re okay, I guess.”
“Sweetie, darling, did you know that ninety-nine percent of women don’t like it when men wear leather pants?”
“Is that true?” I asked.
Without missing a beat, he answered, “It’s totally true. Which works out perfectly, since one hundred percent of men who wear leather pants don’t like women.”
I was still laughing as we approached The Red Room a few minutes later. From the outside, the place itself was nothing to write home about. It was a simple, non-descript red brick building with a big industrial door in the front. I assumed it was the front, because there was no sign that told us that it was truly The Red Room. But there was a line of people waiting to get inside, so it had to be the place.
You could hear a low bass line pumping a distinct house music type beat from the inside. It pulsed and pulsed the closer we got to the door. To the point that I could feel the beat through my platform sneakers as we stood in front of the bouncer. This was where Derek usually came in handy and worked his magic. How he knew the right people at the right place and at the right time all over this city was fascinating. And scary, sometimes. But the man got the job done, because within seconds, he would always get us behind any velvet rope. This time though, I wouldn’t need to rely on Derek. Thanks to Max, which I couldn’t believe I was even thinking of thanking him for anything; he took care of adding me to the elusive guest list.
“Daphne Rodriguez and guest,” the bouncer announced. He looked up at me and then down my body slowly with a smile that made me want to take a scalding hot shower. “I guess that’s you, right?”
“Yeah, that’s me, thanks.”
“And I’m her plus one,” Derek added cheerfully.
The bouncer was still checking me out when he unclipped the velvet-linked rope from the stand and lifted it. His smile was on the verge of serial killer creepy while Derek and I crossed the threshold. We heard some whining from a couple of the people waiting in the line to get in. And I barely gave a shit that they were still waiting while I got to go inside. I had been there and done that enough times that it didn’t faze me anymore. People were going to assume you knew someone or that you blew someone to get to the front of the line and inside a club, bar, wherever. And I found that no matter how many times I tried to explain myself, it fell on deaf ears. So, I preferred to be completely indifferent to the haters. Because haters were, in fact, going to hate no matter what.
The door slammed shut behind us, and we were assaulted with a blast of cold air in the tiny hallway that led to the actual club. Black light and neon spray painted sayings on the walls jumped out at us as we walked a short corridor before it opened up to a larger room. Out of habit, I adjusted the high ponytail on the top of my head and then looked down at myself to see if I had picked the right outfit.
What I had heard of the club’s dress code was that it fell somewhere in the middle but leaned a little more to the underdressed side. As I looked around at the clientele, it seemed that there were mostly casually dressed people with a sprinkle of underdressed here and there. So my high waisted stonewashed circa-early nineties tight jeans, cut off white halter-top, and platform black sneakers worked out perfectly tonight. The jury was still out on Derek’s leather pants, though.
“For a Sunday night, this place is rigoddamndiculously packed.”
“Maybe there’s some special deejay spinning tonight or something we don’t know about,” I offered as a possible reason.
But Derek was right. This club was super crowd
ed. The dance floor looked like it barely could fit another person. And the bar to the left of where we were standing looked like it was two people deep already from this angle. I was kicking myself mentally for not having heard of this place before Max because it would have made a great segment on my YouTube channel.
“You came.”
This was shouted at my back by what I recognized instantly as Max’s voice.
“He’ll be coming too,” Derek whispered in my ear before we turned around. He elbowed me out of the way and offered up his hand to Max. “Hi there, handsome. I’m Derek. It’s so good to finally meet you in person. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
“All good things, I hope?” Max asked him with a mischievous smile on his face. He was staring straight at me while he took Derek’s hand in his and gave it a good shake.
“Not a one,” Derek answered. “And I’m totally okay with that.”
“Good to know,” Max told him. Still focused on me, he added, “I can’t believe you showed up.”
To be honest, I really couldn’t believe I showed up too. And if weren’t for Derek, I wouldn’t be here at all tonight. He wasn’t having the word “no” come from me on this one at all. When Max left the coffeehouse yesterday, Derek stormed back into the room and demanded to know every bit of our conversation. When I detailed the reason for Max’s visit…along with the obscene amount of money that I could potentially be making if I took the job, he basically called me an idiot if I didn’t jump all over it.
Was it a lot of money? Yes, soooo much more money than I currently made with both jobs. But I was a firm believer that money wasn’t going to solve all of my problems. Would it solve the majority of them? Absolutely. But I was okay with continuing on doing what I was doing now. Because if I took this job with Max and it didn’t work out for whatever reason, I’d be stuck with no job, no money, and a whole lot of bills to pay. Max, on the other hand, would still be rich. As of right now, I had all of my money problems under semi-control. Albeit I had barely any freaking time to myself, but still. It’s like that saying about the devil you don’t know or the devil you know is better…I wasn’t sure exactly which. But all of this felt very much like I should know which was better, sooner than later too.
The Better Man (Allen Brothers Series Book 2) Page 5