by Leigh Bale
Families have lifelong relationships together and are bound to get their feelings hurt at some point. How can you keep an open communication and forgiving heart within your family relationships? Are there limits to what we should forgive within our own family? Does forgiving a family member mean we accept their bad behavior?
While trying to win Andie’s forgiveness for leaving her years earlier, Matt comes to realize that his love for her is not dependent upon her loving him. She has her free will to choose whether she loves Matt and how she will act. This revelation brings Matt peace because he chooses to love his family irrespective of how they feel about him. Have you ever chosen to be happy and love someone even though they were unhappy and did not return your love? How did your faith give you the courage to accept another family member’s free will to choose for themself?
Have you ever forgiven a family member who hurt you either physically or mentally? Were you able to let them back into your life? Do you believe it was healthy to let them back into your life? Why or why not? Have you ever hurt a family member who later forgave you? Did they welcome you back into their life? Why or why not?
How can we determine whether or not it is healthy for us to forgive someone and then welcome them back or omit them from our life?
In the story, Matt figures that most wives would bad-mouth their estranged or divorced husband, yet he is surprised to find that Andie has not done much of this. He is especially surprised to discover that Andie did not bad-mouth him to their son. Do you think it is appropriate for a wife or husband to say bad things to their children about their estranged or former spouse? Why or why not?
Andie comes to realize that Matt is suffering deep guilt and angst because he survived the wildfire when his crewman died. She doesn’t want to help Matt deal with his grief, but neither can she turn her back on him when he needs her so much. Have you ever been compelled to help someone else who has hurt you deeply? What did you do?
Andie’s sister, Susan, erases Matt’s voicemail when he tries to contact his wife. Susan means well and is motivated by love and desire to protect Andie, but do you think what she did was right or wrong? Have you ever interfered in family relationships to the point of making the situation worse? Has someone in your family interfered in your life before? How can we offer support to our close family and friends while not interfering or making the situation worse?
Matt is racked by survivor’s guilt and also blames himself for his ruined marriage. By trusting in the Lord and putting his life in God’s control, he realizes that he can choose to be happy, regardless of the bad things that have happened to him. Do you believe people can decide to be happy no matter what the circumstances? Or is it possible to be happy even when our lives fall apart? Why or why not?
Andie reaches the point where she just does not want to be angry at Matt anymore. When we withhold our forgiveness from someone else, does it hurt us, too? Is there a point when it hurts only us? Why or why not?
ISBN: 978-1-4592-1619-8
THE FOREST RANGER’S HUSBAND
Copyright © 2011 by Lora Lee Bale
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