by Penny Blush
“My uncle made sure that I knew how to treat every possible injury or illness. I had intensive medical training. I was taught other things as well but, to answer your question, that’s how I knew what to do to save Memphis.”
“Oh, God,” Cassidy sobbed rushing forward to throw her arms around me, “thank God, you were here.”
Cassidy’s show of emotion broke the tension a little. Her affection towards me gave me hope that I hadn’t just destroyed all my new friendships.
“There’s more to this story,” Bishop said, hands on his hips still not satisfied. “I want to hear it.”
“Enough Bishop,” Jaxon said shoving him, “she’s not going to tell you, and she doesn’t have to. You wanted to know how she knew how to save Memphis, well she just told you. “
“No Jaxon,” Bishop hissed pushing him back. “You’re just as bad keeping shit from us. You should have told us that Memphis was hurt. You should have told us who your cousin really, is.”
“There’s nothing to tell. She’s your boss, my sister, Memphis’s girlfriend, she saved his life, and she loves him that’s all you need to know.”
“No, it’s not, and she’s not the only one who loves him. We all do. We deserve to know the rest.”
“You don’t need to know her history. I can guaran-fucking-tee you haven’t told us every little thing about you. I’m sure there’s shit in your past that you would prefer to stay there. Hedge is entitled to her secrets just like you are.”
Jaxon was getting so riled up, and I knew he was close to losing it at one of his best friends all because he was defending me. The conversation was not at all going the way I thought it would.
The focus has shifted from Memphis to me.
“Jaxon calm down, it’s okay,” I said, trying to defuse the situation.
“It’s not okay, Hedge. You’ve said all you need to say. You don’t owe this asshole any further explanation.”
“Jaxon this is some seriously sketchy ass shit, and you know it,” Bishop said jabbing him in the chest with a finger.
That was the last straw for Jaxon, and he snapped. He grabbed Bishop’s hand twisting it while kicking at his knee dropping him to the ground.
“Let it go, Bishop, it doesn’t concern you.” He looked at the rest of the boys. “Do any of you other assholes have a problem with Hedge or the fact that she had the knowledge and skills to save Memphis’ life?” He was so angry and still holding Bishop down.
“I want to know exactly, who it is that is hanging around my family, around the people I love. A sane person doesn’t go around dealing with stab and gunshot wounds as a fucking hobby. That sounds like some criminal shit. I need to know that she can be trusted and that whatever the fuck is going on is not going to blow back on the rest of us.”
Memphis stepped forward, placing me at his back.
“Bishop, this has nothing to do with Hedge, this is all on me. It was my Pops’ debt. It was my stupid decision to keep paying. Hedge saved my life, not put it in danger.”
“You could have died by the sounds of things you almost did. I want to know,” Bishop hissed.
Everything was quiet for a heartbeat, and then Jaxon unleashed.
“Do you want to know ha?” He yelled, getting in his face. “You want to know how her piece-of-shit uncle manipulated her, used her and tortured her. How someone who loved her and was supposed to take care of her, changed her and made her do horrible things. How he made her save people who didn’t deserve to be saved and was forced to stand by and watch innocent people die!”
I stood watching Jaxon get all up in Bishop’s face like he was an enemy, not a friend. I stood frozen as Jaxon spilt more of my secrets, lost to his anger.
“You want to know how when she wanted out, it wasn’t as simple as handing in her resignation. Her uncle made sure she knew that he was not happy with losing his best asset. Her fucking cunt of an uncle ensured that she would regret asking to leave. He made sure that her body and her soul was crushed. That she was barely a person anymore and then he had the crap beaten out of her for days. She was so severely fucked-up that when he dumped her on my doorstep, I didn’t recognize her. That she was so broken and lost that I had to watch her night and day because I was scared that she was going to kill herself!”
“Jaxon!” I yelled, pulling away from Memphis.
Jaxon looked up at me with pain and anger in his eyes, his chest heaving. Then realisation hit, and it registered just how much he had said, how much he had disclosed. Secrets, my secrets, they were mine, they weren’t his to tell. That were now hanging heavy in the air that he should never have revealed.
“Jaxon,” I whispered. “What did you do?”
“Oh, God, Shit Cuz, I didn’t mean…” Jaxon said, dropping Bishop to the floor, moving to approach me slowly. “I am so sorry.”
“No. Don’t.” I sobbed. “You promised,” shoving past him I ran out of the apartment not looking back.
Chapter 8 Jaxon
Oh, fuck. What have I done?
Me and my stupid big mouth.
Shit, fuck, shit!
“You promised,” she sobbed looking at me like I had just torn her heart out and then she ran. She was back to running.
“Hedge!” Memphis called, but she didn’t stop. “Jaxon, what the fuck!” he roared at me.
“Memphis, I can stand here talking to you or I can go and get her before she disappears,” desperately I gave him the options. Time was running out while we were arguing.
“Go,” was all he said, and I took off into the night to find her.
I took the stairs two at a time racing after her. When we were little, I knew exactly where to find her if she cracked it and ran off. But now she could be anywhere. With the new skills that she had learned she could be in the wind. Hedge would only be found if, she wanted to be found.
I slammed through the back door, scanning the backyard.
Shit, she could be anywhere. I started to walk towards the water’s edge, thinking that maybe she had headed in that direction and then I heard a soft sniff.
Stopping, I stood quietly with my hands on my hips just watching the shadows dance across the yard and river.
I heard the sniff again, and the weight lifted a little from my chest. That sniff was for me. Hedge wanted me to know where she was that she was safe. If she didn’t want to be found, even if I had the best trackers in the world, she would not be found. I knew where she was, thinking about it, it should have been the first place I looked.
I slipped my phone out of my pocket and sent Memphis a quick text.
Me: Found her. She’s ok
Tell every 1 2 stay put
That includes U
Memph: Where?
What the fuck?
Me: Let me talk 2 her
Memphis: Tell Me NOW!
Me: You can kick my ass later. Let me deal with it. Please
I stuffed my phone back into my pocket and waited, just like when we were kids. I let her know that I was here and that she was safe. I would give her space until she was ready and came out.
I don’t know how long I stood there waiting for her to process what was rolling through her head. On the outside it looked like I was just standing there listening to the river. But in my head, I was screaming and yelling at myself for being such an ass, letting my anger at Bishop make me lose control over my tongue.
Fuck I was such an asshole. I knew everyone was mad at me for bailing up Bishop and yelling in his face, but the bastard deserved it. The prick wouldn’t take the hint and back off. I couldn't care less though. I was more worried about Hedge.
I didn’t hear her come out of her hiding spot - I just felt her tiny hand slip into mine. Thank fuck I yelled in my head, suppressing my outward show of relief.
“You okay?” I asked squeezing her hand falling into our old routine.
She squeezed mine back, and I kissed the top of her head. We started walking towards the river’s edge. I could feel Memphis’s eyes
boring into the back of my head as we walked across the yard. We walked, and I stayed quiet, just holding her hand and waiting until she was ready to talk.
“Jax,” she murmured. “You shouldn’t have said anything.”
“I know,” I pulled her into a hug. “I am so sorry Cuz, my stupid mouth will get me into trouble every time. Not that that’s an excuse though. I should have kept my mouth shut.”
“Yes, you should have,” she said stepping out of my arms. “Why did you though? I hadn’t told Memphis that part of my story yet. He just got blindsided as much as everyone else.”
“Fuck,” I ran my hand down my face in frustration. “Fucking Bishop he just kept pushing and pushing and wouldn't let it go. I, I just snapped. I thought that if he knew what you went through that, maybe he would back off.”
I bent down and picked up a hand full of rocks, skipping one across the river.
“I didn’t mean for my thoughts to come out though. My brain-mouth filter broke. Please don’t hate me. I totally understand if you do. But please don’t.”
“I don’t hate you, Jax,” she sighed snatching a rock out of my hand and skimming it across the water. “I might be pissed at you. I might add salt instead of sugar to your coffee for a while, but I don’t hate you. I could never hate you. You’re my brother.”
“Your big brother would have locked that shit in the vault and never let it out,” I grumbled.
It was hard living in Davan’s shadow. I was always comparing myself to her war hero brother. Not that Hedge ever did. I did it to myself, and he had big shoes to fill.
“Davan is not here, you are. Yes, you slipped up, but you did it, protecting me.” She was always so quick to forgive my stupidity. “Stop comparing yourself to him. He’s not around and hasn’t been for a while. You need to get over it.”
We hadn’t walked too far away from the shop. I knew she wouldn’t want to be too far from Memphis, but we were out of earshot. Resting against a tree looking back towards her home and there was a giant shadowed figure on the balcony. It made me smile.
“What are you smiling about?” she asked, giving me a curious look.
“He’s watching you, you know?” I lifted my chin in the direction of the apartment. “He always is.”
“How long has Memphis been standing there?” She turned looking back.
“Since you ran out of the apartment.”
“What?” she yelled and looked at her watch. “Oh my God, it’s been almost two hours, shit!” She started to head back. “I need to get back and make sure he’s okay. He shouldn’t be standing there he should be resting. God, I’ve made things worse. He’s going to hate me.”
“Cuz, wait. Just give it a little bit longer,” I said reaching out to grab her arm stopping her.
Not that I wanted to punish Memphis any longer, by not knowing what was going on, but she needed to talk. She needed to get a handle on things before she went back and faced everyone.
“He’s okay, and I’ve been watching. Cassidy made him sit, and Bear brought him a drink, they’re taking care of him. You need to talk to me. You need to get your head right before you go back. I know that you’re mentally beating yourself up over what happened. None of that is on you. If anyone is to blame its Bishop for being an ass and me and my stupid mouth.” I skimmed another rock across the water. “He’s not going to hate you.” I smiled again.
“What’s with the smile now?”
I laughed. “Memphis just stood up when you yelled. It makes my heart happy to know that he cares that much about you.” I said chuckling using her stupid made-up word.
“I like that he’s watching over you, worried, waiting for you to come back so he can make sure that you’re okay.” I grinned adding, “you have my blessing.”
It was her turn to laugh. I was glad to see that she wasn’t retreating into herself like I feared she was going to.
“Thanks for your blessing Jax. You do realise that we have been together for almost a year, right?”
“Yeah, but you know what I mean.”
“Yeah, I do. I am, so sorry Jax,” her tone solemn again.
“What do you have to be sorry for?” I asked.
“I’m sorry that I didn’t listen to Davan when he said that I couldn’t go with Uncle Charlie. I’m sorry that I didn’t go home with you from Japan. I’m sorry that I let him manipulate me the way he did.” Her voice wavered her emotions building, starting to get the better of her. “I’m sorry I came home so broken. But most of all I’m sorry that you felt responsible for me. I’m sorry you thought that I was so irrevocably damaged, that I would kill myself,” she sobbed, launching herself into my arms.
“Oh Kid, you have nothing to apologise for. If anyone has anything to apologise for it is me. I’m sorry that I didn’t do what Davan asked me to and talked you out of going. I’m sorry I didn’t force you to come home with me when I left Japan. I’m sorry I hovered over you when you finally did come home, and I’m sorry my fears made you think that you couldn’t be trusted.”
“Jax, what am I going to do?” her voice muffled from where she had her face buried in my chest. "Memphis is going to hate me, so are the others. I know Bishop hates me. I kinda get it, but it just doesn’t make sense. I mean he was really angry with me.”
“Cassidy doesn’t hate you. I know that for a fact. She is the least judgmental person I know. Bear and Davis won’t hate you they just need to understand. Memphis loves you with his whole heart and couldn’t possibly hate you. He loves you too much to ever hate you. He might be a little pissed that you didn’t tell him everything.”
“I said that there was more to the story, but I just couldn’t tell it all at once. There is still so much awful shit that I need to discuss with Memphis. I was building up to how I got out. I know he needs to know I… I just thought I was done with that part of my life, you know.”
“He will understand,” I reiterated.
“And what about Bishop?” She asked quietly. She might be a badass, but she still hated the idea of anyone not liking her. “He’s part of the family, and we have to work together.”
“Oh, he hates you,” I laughed at her shocked expression. “But he hates you for an entirely different reason that has very little to do with what you did, what you were or that little circus upstairs.”
“What do you mean? What the hell did I do to him?” She demanded. “He has no reason to hate me.”
“You got Memphis to fall in love with you.”
“What?”
“Bishop has been in love with Memphis for as long as I have known him,” I shrugged.
“Bishop is gay? But, but I’ve seen him with women, he can’t be gay,” Hedge looked confused.
“Bishop is a lover of all God’s children,” I laughed.
Bishop and I went way back, his sexual preference has never been an issue. Hell, I never really thought about it. He is who he is, and I love him just the same. Right at this very moment, I might not like him. But he was my friend, so I’d have to get over it, eventually. Hedge sighed, it was a happy sigh though, and she smiled at me.
“What are YOU smiling about?” I asked.
“Nothing, it’s just, I love that he has people in his life that care about him so much, that’s all.”
“You really do love him, don’t you?” I asked, already knowing the answer.
“Jax, I have never felt this way about anyone before. I know it sounds corny and all but, ‘love’ doesn’t seem like a big enough word to describe what I feel for him. If anything happened to him. I don’t know what I would do.”
“I know he feels the same,” I offered.
“What am I going to do about Bishop?” She asked, looking at me for help. “I don’t want there to be any animosity or weirdness between us or any of the guys. They’re my friends, but I am also their boss. I need to fix things so that they aren’t awkward for everyone, especially Memphis.”
I thought about it for a while, smirking. “Challenge Bishop.
”
“What?”
“Challenge him. I know that Memphis getting the crap kicked out of him had nothing to do with you. And I know it sounds sexist. And I know you're anything but a tiny little wallflower, but Bishop needs to know that Memphis is safe with you.”
“I would never do anything to hurt him. I love him.”
“Bishop needs to know that Memphis is not going to get hurt with you and not just his heart but also that you aren’t going to bring anything bad into his life. They all need to know.” I shrugged. “Challenge him.”
I could see the idea rolling around in her head. She has never been one to back down from any challenge thrown at her. Then there was a light and a fire in her eyes.
“My past had nothing to do with Memphis getting attacked. I don’t know why I should have to prove myself. Memphis loves me that should be enough.”
“I know Cuz, but boys are dumb. It’s just the way it is. I’m sorry I don’t write the rules, but you’ll need to prove yourself.”
“Fine. I’ll challenge him. But I’ll need your help,” she said sounding excited.
“Done,” I replied.
Hedge squealed with excitement, pulling out her phone, Memphis stood up gripping the railing of the deck. I stood watching my best friend freaking out on the balcony as my cousin spoke fast into her phone.
“Hedge, we better get back before Memphis jumps off the balcony and comes storming down here,” I tilted my chin towards the apartment.
“Jaxon, this, is going to be so much fun!” Hedge squealed, jumping up and down with excitement.
“Calm down, Spaz.”
“I’m just, so excited! Not just about proving to Bishop that Memphis was safe with me, but it is something that we should have done before now. It’s been so long since we’ve played together.”
I couldn’t help smiling at her excitement. I knew precisely, what she wanted to do, and I was looking forward to it too. She linked her arm through mine as we walked back.
Memphis kept his eyes locked on Hedge the whole way back to the shop. Bishop was standing in the corner of the railing like a damn thundercloud, looking a hurt and ready to explode.