by Baylin Crow
I devoured him, stroking him, filling him, until he came, chanting my name. I panted into his parted lips as I lost myself in his body, a powerful release that stole my breath as much as he'd stolen my heart.
Boneless, we melted against each other until I was able to drag myself out of bed. He was already half asleep as I cleaned his stomach. Too drained to care, I tossed the washcloth on the floor and collapsed back in bed.
Archer scooted across the sheets and fell asleep lying half on top of me, legs tangled with mine. Contentment I didn't know was possible settled in my bones as I watched him sleep.
My life was full of open-ended questions. I wasn't sure if the band would like my song, and if they did, what that meant for me as a working songwriter. I didn't know where I'd end up working or how Archer going back to college when the semester started would affect our relationship. Would he still live next door? Stay on campus?
Whatever the answers to those questions were would come with time. The one thing I knew for certain was that Archer was mine and I was his.
Epilogue
Phoenix/Two Years Later
My hands shake as I wait next to the small stage of The Coffee Symphony, a shop that caters to musicians on Friday nights. Archer and I have taken to popping in often, so when I asked to fill one of tonight's openings, the owner was surprised but stuck me on the roster. Of the five artists scheduled to perform, I'm up first.
I still haven't played in front of a crowd since Nashville. I'd never intended to either until recently.
I shoot a worried glance to Damon as he stands next to me. "I think I'm going to be sick."
He chuckles. "Please don't. That’s not the kind of memory you want to look back on a decade from now."
"Why the fuck am I so nervous?" I shake out my hands, trying to get rid of the tingles in my fingers. That would be highly inconvenient once I start playing the song I've been obsessing over for a month now.
He shrugs. "Cold feet, maybe?"
That's not it at all. If anything, I've never been so sure of anything in my life. Not even when I'd taken the blind leap to move to Tennessee four years ago. I shake my head. "No, that's the only reason I'm doing this."
His brow furrows as he rocks back on his heels with one hand stuffed in his pockets. "Worried he'll say no then?"
I roll my lips together, tasting the café au lait I'd downed minutes before. Archer is still unpredictable and full of surprises, but… "No, I'm not worried… I don't think."
He knocks his arm into mine, and my grip tightens around the neck of my guitar that hangs from the strap over my shoulder.
"He's going to say yes. A million times yes." His voice rises in octaves and dramatics as if he's starring in a Christmas romance movie.
Blowing out a deep breath, I wipe my clammy palms on my jeans. "I hope so, or this could be the most embarrassing experience of my life."
"And yet, you'd still take that chance." It wasn't a question.
"In a heartbeat," I reply without hesitation. I want my ring on Archer's finger and to be able to call him mine forever.
He grins. "Thought so. Can't believe my boy is taking the plunge."
"Might be," I correct him, but Damon scoffs. We quiet as the clock continues to tick down to my slotted time.
My gaze scans over the packed room that overflows with people I've never seen before. They have no idea what I'm about to do. I look to the table our friends and family sit at, front and center of the stage. When my eyes connect with Isaac's, he must see the nerves rattling around my brain. He tilts his head in encouragement.
I'd asked for his permission a week before, and he'd howled in laughter when I told him how I wanted to pop the question. "Still whipped. Boy, you're already shaking like a newborn calf. You know you don't have to make a grand gesture like that. He loves you, and you could probably propose in a closet and he'd be over the moon."
Isaac's wrong. I do have to. Want to.
Archer had given me back my music years ago. Now, I want to show him how much I love him for that in the only way I know how. Since Courting Echoes agreed to the first song I'd written, I did a second for their newest album, much to Drake's annoyance. The first had topped the charts and put me on many other bands’ radar. I've now written enough ballads to live a comfortable life off the royalties they provide. I still write every day and submit my songs everywhere I can. Sometimes I hit gold, and sometimes I face rejection. It's just part of the industry.
Shaking off the thoughts, I squint at the others that sit with Isaac. Next to him there's an empty high back chair meant for Archer once he shows up. On his other side, Caleb and his girlfriend, who he's completely head over ass for, are snuggled together like always. CJ slouches in the seat beside the couple, sipping something out of a tall glass while scrolling through his phone. Of the twins, I was shocked when Archer told me it was Caleb of all people who'd met a girl he followed around like a lost puppy. She must be a saint to put up with him.
Fishing my phone from my pocket, I glance at the time. Five minutes until I'm due on stage, and there's still no Archer.
Damon shifts next to me. "He'll be here on time, right?"
"I sure as shit hope so." Otherwise I'd have to improvise on the spot or walk away with my head hung in defeat. Not that it would stop me from hunting him down and proposing in the middle of the street if I had to. This was happening tonight. One way or another.
I search the crowded room again, trying to spot the head full of messy dark auburn curls I love to tangle my fingers through. There's still no trace of him, and I let loose a shaky breath.
After technically sharing a dorm with CJ for the first year we were together—though he stayed at my place almost every night—we'd made things official and moved his things that hadn't already taken up half of my closet and drawer space. We still lived next door to Isaac, which I'm not going to lie, sucks sometimes. He never lets me live down how much I'm wrapped around Archer's little finger. But it's true, so I can't ever argue the point. Much to his amusement.
Recently graduated from college, he still helps Isaac at the shop while he continues to pursue his publishing dream. In the meantime, he's become an indie author and his books do sell. I'm always his first customer and his books sit on the shelf, signed since I'm proud as shit of the author. I'm not sure what they'll be worth one day to someone else. But it doesn't matter. To me, they're priceless. I've seen the blood, sweat and tears he puts into those books, especially when he's down to a deadline.
Tonight, Isaac left Archer at the parlor with instructions to close early and meet him here at nine to discuss an issue with the shop.
I couldn't have him show up early. My nerves were shot and I knew I needed the hours to gather myself and my words, even though I'd practiced them dozens of times. Now, as I wait for him to show his beautiful face, I'm second guessing that idea.
A man brushes past me, and my gaze shoots to the owner who climbs on stage and leans down to speak through the microphone. He smiles and the room begins to silence. "Please welcome Phoenix Ryan to the stage."
Fuck. I groan under my breath as the clock has run out.
A round of clapping fills the room as Damon gives me a small shove to get me moving.
"Break a leg," Damon says and then heads off to join our crew.
With my heart racing in my chest, I join the owner beneath the glowing spotlight. He claps a hand on my shoulder. "Good luck."
I stand behind the mic, without a decision made on my next move. Even my friends and family have started to appear worried. Just as acceptance and disappointment sinks in my gut, the door opens and I watch as my boyfriend steps through the door. My heart races for a new reason. I'm actually doing this.
Now that it's really happening, my veins pulse in a frantic rhythm. Archer scans the packed room, skimming right over me before his head whips back around. We lock eyes, and the murmuring crowd is forgotten. His rich brown orbs shine with confusion and his brow dips as he takes i
n the scene before him.
Isaac must have spotted his nephew because he meets him at the door and leads him to their table. The whole time Archer never looks away from me and I watch him right back as he pulls out the chair facing me. He glances away for a moment, and I see his lips moving. Isaac leans in. I don't know what he says, but Archer returns his attention back on me. I give him a crooked grin, and he frowns. Not the reaction I was hoping for, and I can only hope it doesn't reflect his reaction once I pour my soul all over the platform.
The crowd has waited long enough—not that I care about anything other than my boyfriend at the moment—so I sit on the stool and adjust the microphone before settling the guitar in my lap. As I stroke a single cord the room grows quiet again. I hold my stare with Archer West—possibly Archer Ryan if all things go as planned.
Finally, my lips loosen. "Hi, I'm Phoenix Ryan and this song is titled ‘Unexpected Muse’."
Archer's eyes widen. I've called him that often enough now that he must realize this song is for him.
I play the intro and then lean in close to the mic and let the words I'd slaved over roll from my lips and flow into the room.
Word blind and hollow,
I became a void filled with dust.
Rooted in place,
My dreams turned to rust.
Then there was you,
My unexpected muse.
Our unlikely symmetry
Unearthed caged words buried inside of me,
Resurrecting who I was
Before the poles, bills and clubs.
Stripped bare for you,
I offer this confession.
Treading muddy waters,
I was in search of my reflection.
Lost in memories of my path—
How I'd lost my direction.
Stripped bare for you, my unexpected muse
Lyrics and stories written by moonlight and stars
Became the steady rhythm of our hearts.
Unguarded moments stolen in the dark—
Layer by layer we came apart.
Because there was you,
My unexpected muse.
At first sight, all your unknowns
were already forgiven.
You were the breath of fresh air,
That broke through the prison.
The shackles that trapped my soul
Dissolved because with you I'm whole.
Stripped bare for you,
I offer you this confession.
Treading muddy waters,
I was in search of my reflection.
Lost in memories of my path—
How I'd lost my direction.
Stripped bare for you, my unexpected muse
For a bruised moment
shaded in blues and sorrow,
You slipped away—
Your absence left me hollow.
In this cruel world, my vision came clear,
My future imagined without you here.
Then there was you,
My unexpected muse.
They say love is unconditional,
But we set fire to the traditional.
Beyond words that fill venues and empty pages—
The type of love that spans all ages.
Stripped bare for you,
I offer you this confession.
Treading muddy waters,
I was in search of my reflection.
Lost in memories of my path—
How I'd lost my direction.
Stripped bare for you, my unexpected muse
You strip me bare—
Completely exposed.
You're more than my muse,
Your love makes me whole.
My muse, my world,
My always and forever,
Will you do me the honor
And be mine—always—in this life together?
As I stroke the last cord, my chest tightens as the crowd sits silent. Honestly, I think a lot of them are confused.
I'm aware the lines are a bit cheesy. But they're honest. I’d wanted there to be no room for doubt to what I’m asking—an unwavering promise of a future with me. And yet, he still sits there with a bewildered expression. Well, shit.
"Oh my God, he just proposed!" A girl shouts and excited chatter fills the room, but my eyes are still locked on Archer.
My nervous laugh echoes through the mic.
The girl yells again. "Put him out of his misery whoever the lucky person is. He's sweating bullets up there!"
The crowd joins in the chants say yes, but I only watch as Archer's cheeks flush. I hadn’t considered the pressure of publicly proposing, and my heart hammers when he doesn't move. But then with the urging of CJ and Caleb, he stands and slowly makes his way to the stage where he climbs to stand next to me. I meet his searching gaze.
"I don't want to assume because she said—" he stutters in a whisper and twists his fingers.
I drop to a knee, pull the small velvet box from my pocket, and pop open the lid. His eyes fill with tears and my chest constricts. "Archer West…" I swallow around a lump wedged in my throat. "I love you from the bottom of my soul and can't imagine my life without you in it every single day. Will you marry me?"
A drawn-out pause has me holding my breath. His lips twist to the side and he cocks his head. "Will I be Archer Ryan or will you be Phoenix West?"
His question catches me off guard and the breath whooshes from my lungs. Shoulders shaking in amusement, I stare up into his glimmering eyes. "I'll be whatever you want me to be, Arch."
"I like the sound of Archer Ryan." He nods.
"Maybe first you could answer me?" I suggest, but it comes out as a question.
His brow furrows as if my words are absurd. "Of course I will."
Okay, so not exactly like a Christmas movie. But so very much Archer.
Relieved and buzzing with new energy that puts a broad smile on my face, I slip the band onto his finger. He holds up his hand, inspecting the red speckled ring I'd managed to find, almost identical to the one I still wear.
"It's perfect." He beams, but a lone tear slips free and falls from his eyelash.
Clapping and hoots rise in the room as I stand and fold him in my arms, pulling him tight against my chest.
Archer tips his head back. "I think you're supposed to kiss me now."
I chuckle and drop my lips to his, brushing them with a feathering touch. "I'm going to kiss you every day for the rest of our lives."
"Unless I'm sick," he mutters and a choked laugh bubbles in my throat.
"Even then it'll be worth the risk." I slant my mouth over his in a devouring kiss.
Hoots turn into whistles, but I'm lost to the feel and taste of Archer. I'll never get enough, and I'm not sure a lifetime of these moments will ever slake my need for him.
I pull back and peer down at my game changer—my muse. Our hearts beat in sync. My soul is tethered to his. My ring may be on his finger, but Archer West holds my heart in the palm of his hand. And I never want it back.
The End
Acknowledgments
This book wouldn't have been published without my incredibly appreciated support team. This year has been rough with the pandemic. It tossed an extra dose of upheaval in my personal life, so I want to start with thanking my kids who, despite being stuck at home, have handled all the things thrown at them this year with maturity beyond their years.
Kid one and two, you better never actually be reading this. You two rock for understanding and finding ways to keep busy while I was stationed in front of my laptop for hours on end.
To my loudest cheerleader, my mom, you are probably the biggest reason my books see the light of day. Thank you for all your pep talks and all-around support.
Jill Wexler, thank you for being there when doubt gets the better of me and putting up with my brand of weird. Your patience and support are everything. Also, thanks for saving me from the pickle I found myself in.
Rheland Ric
hmond, Abigail Kade, Brittany Cournoyer, and Neve Wilder thank you for talking me down when I have occasional (or often) panic attacks and giving me an ear to vent to. Sorry in advance for the next time it happens.
Bryce Winters, thank you for the blurb feedback. I still love the tagline.
My Crow's Clubhouse reader group, you guys are amazing. It's nice to know I've got my own corner of the online world filled with readers and authors who support my work and provide a positive and fun atmosphere.
This gorgeous cover was the result of the wonderfully talented Cate Ashwood who made my vision come to life. Kudos, girl. I'm picky as hell about covers.
Thank you to the many authors, groups and blogs that help spread the word of Stripped Love.
To you, the reader, I couldn't do this whole author thing without you. Thank you for reading, reviewing, recommending and sharing the book. It means the absolute world to me.
XOXO -Baylin
About Baylin
Bios are challenging. I don't have a clue how to write about myself. Fictional characters? Sure! Me? Not so much. It's the reason my author bio stayed practically blank until after I finished my second novel.
Who am I? Well, I guess I should start by telling you that I write MM romance and I love what I do.
I fell in love with writing during elementary school with my first "Bare Book" but honestly never thought I'd become an author. It always seemed to be something I dreamed of and not something I could make a reality. Now that I have, I can't picture myself doing anything else.