He Owns Me (Owning Me series Book 1)

by J. L. Ostle

  “Yeah, I’m Jonathan Stone, Ma’am.” He pauses. “Yeah, Raven and I are best friends. We have been for the last three years.” My ears pick up when he mentions my name. He turns to me, looking confused about what the other person is saying. “I’m sure that’s not true. Raven wouldn’t intentionally ignore you. Yes, she is doing good. Yeah, she’s happy.” Who the hell is he talking to? I walk closer to him and realize he is using my phone. “Yeah, she has told me what happened in her past. Of course, I believe her, why would she lie?” I try and grab my phone but he pulls away from me. I feel myself starting to go erratic.

  “Jonny, give me the phone,” I say to him, but he’s listening to whoever is on the other line.

  “She wouldn’t make up such lies for attention, how can a mother not believe their daughter?” He starts to look angry, and I try to reach for my phone but he spins around and takes a few steps away from me. “I do know your daughter. She is kind, sweet and loving and if she has ignored you for the past three years, now I know why. You should have been there for her, supporting her.” He breathes in and out. “No, I don’t need to listen to this shit. If you try to call her again without a fucking apology than have a nice life, she doesn’t need your money, I can support her.” He listens and starts to laugh. “I own Stone enterprises so yeah, I can support her, so you can leave her alone. Goodbye, Mrs. Hutchinson.” He hangs up and looks at me.

  “Jonny…” He interrupts me.

  “Your parents didn’t believe you?” I look at him, wondering if she mentioned him. “They think you made it up.” I nod even though he isn’t asking. “I know my dad can be a dick, but how can they not believe you? You told them about the bullying at the beginning didn’t you?”

  “Yes.” I keep looking at him.

  “And they think you made up the last bit.” I nod again.

  “Because I stopped telling, they thought it stopped.” He walks to me and looks into my eyes.

  “I know you’re telling the truth and you know how I know?” I shake my head. “Because I can see the pain in your eyes. I could sense you were broken. I felt drawn to you by your demons. You may have put yourself back together but I can still see your pain. You don’t need your parents. Me, Caron, and even Alan are your family. You have us and that’s all you need.” I try to stop the tears from falling.

  I have cried enough.

  “What did she say?” I had to ask.

  “That you made it up because you were alone, because you wanted to be noticed; that you were going through a rebellious stage.”

  “Think I have gone through that in college.” I laugh and he chuckles at me.

  “Yeah, me too. But once she started throwing her money around, saying you are going to need it, I felt like she wanted to put something over your head. No wonder why you haven’t talked to her for so long.” He pulls me in closer and places his chin on my head. “I will look after you.” I wrap my arms around his middle and squeeze and I feel him tense up.

  “You okay?” I look up at him and he still looks ahead.

  “Yeah, I’m fine. I’m here for you.” I don’t know why, but that line echoes over and over in my head. With his voice and Jonny’s. I just hope this time it’s true.

  Raven

  I am at the bar with Jonny as we wait to get served. Jonny wants me to be me but I'm not sure who that is. For the last three years, I created a girl I thought was a badass who took no shit from anyone. I feel like I have become that person; I won't take shit from anyone. I don’t even take shit from Jonny, but I'm no whore. I guess I am a bit of both in a way. I do like attention but not to the point I would lie.

  Well intentionally.

  The bartender comes over and asks for our order and I know I really need a drink. I couldn't celebrate our graduation because he who shall not be named had to ruin it, and it didn’t help that I ended up in the hospital. Now I just want to get drunk and dance. I can't remember the last time I danced. I ask for four shots of tequila, a cocktail for me, and a beer for Jonny.

  “Would the old you drink shots?” Jonny teases me.

  “Probably not, but I know I'm not that girl, not really, but she will always be there. Does that make sense?” I turn to him and he gives me a smile, lining our shots.

  “Yeah it does. You are still you, but you are an improved you.” He picks up the first shot, waiting for me to tap his glass with mine.

  “Here’s to being me.” I down the shot, letting the burn hit my stomach. I pick up the next and down that one. I take a quick sip of my cocktail and grab Jonny's hand and drag him to the dancefloor.

  “I didn’t plan on dancing just yet,” Jonny complains.

  “I need this, so stop being moody and wiggle your hips.” I laugh as I start moving to the beat. “I'm not expecting a well thought out dance routine, just move a little.” I take another sip of my drink and watch him take a big gulp of his bottled beer and start moving. I try not to giggle at how uncomfortable he looks.

  We continue dancing and drinking, but I stopped on the shots. I only had the two, to just loosen me up, and I do feel loosened. Some guys try to ask me for a dance but I turn each of them down and Jonny does that same when a girl tries to get his attention. This is our night.

  I am smiling and happy. A slow song comes on, Nick Lachey What’s Left of Me. I move in closer to Jonny and rest my head on his shoulder and we start to move to the words. I feel his hand stroke down my back and I feel at peace. He knows more of me, and I am happy he does. I will eventually talk about the guy from the letter but one little bit at a time.

  I close my eyes and let the music sway us. I feel his hand glide into my hair and I look up to him and he looks down at me and smiles. I keep my eyes on his and we continue to move. I can't look away. He tucks some hair over my ear and strokes my face,

  “Why do I feel like I’m just seeing you for the first time?”

  “Because you’re starting to see all of me, the bad and ugly.”

  “And the beautiful. You have such beauty it shines through you. I feel like you are bathed in light; I feel like I can't touch it.” I wrap my arms around his neck.

  “Maybe you're scared to come into my light.” I watch him swallow.

  “I want to stay in the light with you.” He leans down so his lips are close to mine.

  “Stay with me, be with me, Jonny. Own me.” I barely get out; I see his eyes searching mine. I think he is about to kiss me when I feel my arm being tugged and I turn to see Caron beaming at me.

  “You came clubbing without me? Some friend you are.” She hugs me and I turn to Jonny and he is rubbing the back of his neck.

  “You invited her?” He nods.

  “Not just me, Alan is at the bar. Now the whole family is here. Now stop with the mushy dancing and let's shake our asses. Oh and Raven?” I look away from Jonny and look to her. “No showing off, just normal dancing.” I smirk at her and take a step back.

  “So no doing this.” I go on my tiptoes and start to spin and stop in a pose.

  “Exactly.” She rolls her eyes, grabs my hand, and drags me to the middle of the dancefloor. I turn and see Jonny still standing there watching me. He hasn’t answered me, now the ball is in his court.

  Caron and I dance and even Alan joined in at times but Jonny stays at a booth nearby, just watching. Caron tried to get him to dance but he refused. I start to feel that maybe I overstepped on what I was feeling. Maybe I can blame the alcohol if he doesn’t feel the same, it’s not his fault, but why do I feel crappy?

  Alan is in the middle sandwiched between me and Caron while we are trying to dance seductively around him. He looks like he is having the time of his life. We are throwing our heads back in laughter as he starts to act all big man. I tell them I need to get a drink and I head back to the table and Jonny is on his phone, he doesn’t look up when I sit down.

  “Everything okay?” I ask him.

  “They need me to start work tomorrow, there is a huge client and Dad needs me on board. He
promised me if I start tomorrow, I can get some off time in 4 weeks.” He says, still not looking up. He is already going to start work? What about our time hanging out before the real world had to kick in?

  “What about our plan? You know, be lazy and watch loads of movies and party. Enjoy being young and carefree while we still can.” Wiz Khalifa See You Again starts to play. He looks up at me and shakes his head and stands.

  “Some of us haven’t got the luxury of doing nothing; some of us have responsibilities and need to start entering the big world. We all can’t be like you and party, hiding what she wants with her life,” he spews at me and I feel tears prickle my eyes.

  “Raven…” I stand up, looking at him.

  “Your right, you go be Mr. Boss Man. I’m just going to party since that’s what I do.” I turn around but he grabs my arm and pulls me in close to him. “Don’t touch me.” I shrug him off.

  “You know, I can’t catch a fucking break; every time I start to feel a little ounce of happiness, we argue, or my past comes knocking or I end up freaking fainting. I wanted to hang out with my best friend. I wanted to be with you. You know what, just go. You are ruining my night.” I start to walk away.

  “Raven!” he shouts out. I keep on walking, putting my middle finger up in the air.

  I walk to Caron and she asks me where Jonny is going, and I tell her he has to work. She looks at me and I know she can sense something is wrong but I shake my head, telling her I’m not ready to talk about it. She nods and when a waitress holding a tray of shots comes by, Caron signals her over and buys the whole thing. We take a shot here and there and continue dancing. My body starts to feel fuzzy, the alcohol doing its job. It made me forget about Mr. Ass, even if it is just for the night.

  Jonny

  “Stay with me, be with me, Jonny. Own me,” Raven says with her silky voice. I look into her eyes to see if it’s the alcohol talking or if she is being sincere, and I know she is.

  My lips are so close to hers, I can feel her breath on me. I want to claim her, to finally own her. I waited so long to finally have her but something is holding me back. When Caron interrupts us, I feel relieved. I need to get my thoughts together. I watch as Caron drags Raven to the dancefloor and I stand and watch her smile and laugh. Whenever she looks at me, I feel like a lucky man.

  This girl wants me.

  “She looks at you like you’re her world, you know that right?” Alan says to me. On cue, Raven looks at me and gives me a smile and I feel my heart take an extra beat.

  “I know.” I do.

  “You know, she’s a good person, a good girl.” I replay the whole conversation in my head. Hearing her say she lied about who she was, her telling me what she went through. She is a strong person, she keeps fighting.

  “I know she is.” I take a sip from my drink.

  “Then you know she isn’t the girl we knew; she isn’t a badass chick who fucks around. I thought she was you but a girl version. She was like your double but now…” He looks out to the dancefloor. “You could hurt her; you could break her. Yeah, what happened in London she agreed to do, but that’s only because she knows you do it. She may not realize it, but she wants to please you, even if it is subconsciously. She wants you, she relies on you. Can you take that kind of responsibility?” I don’t answer.

  Am I willing to be with her, knowing what I like, can I ask that of her?

  For the rest of the night, I sit there and think; think about what it would be like to finally have her, to tell the world she is mine. To finally make love to her. But then I know she will want to try BDSM. Will she be like Cheryl? Will she turn out to be the same? I look back on the dancefloor and seeing Raven’s smile, I know I would ruin it. It’s what I do.

  I take out my phone and dial my dad’s number. I know it's late but tough shit. I need to do this now before I change my mind. I hear it ringing and after the eighth time, he picks up.

  “This better be good,” he says sternly.

  “I want to start work. I want to start first thing.” I hear him pause.

  “You being serious?” He sounds surprised.

  “Yeah, I am.”

  “Well, great, I have a client coming in a couple of days, so come in tomorrow and we can get you all prepped up.” He sounds over eager.

  “See you tomorrow.” I hang up before he says anything else.

  I don’t want him asking why. I’m looking at my phone in my hand. I know without looking that Raven is coming back to the table. I could always sense her in some way. I can feel her eyes on me but I don’t dare look up; if I do, I might cave.

  When she asks me if everything is okay, I just blurt out that I have to start working. When she goes on about our summer, I feel myself get angry, but it’s not her fault. I stand and snap at her and when the words leave my mouth, I instantly regret them. I didn’t mean a word. Seeing that I upset her hurts me. All I ever do is keep on hurting her. I have seen her cry more times these last few days then I have the last three years. I watch her walk away; I watch as our friendship starts to go down the toilet.

  Raven

  College – Freshman Year

  I am running as fast as I can. I feel the tears sliding down my face as I try to get somewhere safe. I can't believe they took pictures of me, letting those guys touch me. I can't stay here anymore; I can't let them keep doing this to me. I know it will never end, and I can't handle it for another three years.

  I can't not go to college, I want a good future. I want to be happy. I want to be able to walk down the halls and not be scared about who I may run into. I don’t want people to know who I am. I just want a fresh start, a place I can feel safe to be me.

  I look behind me and I don’t think they are chasing me. I look down my body and feel the cold hit my skin. I'm glad it's dark so no one can see me in my underwear. My breathing is hurting my chest so I stop just for a second and try to calm down. I look around and see I’m almost at his house. He will look after me, he will keep me safe until I know what to do.

  He will help me. It's what he has always done.

  I wrap my arms around myself to fight the cold and when I see his house, I feel my body start to relax. I walk to the door and knock and wait. When I don’t hear any movement, I knock a little louder. He may be asleep. I walk to the windows and peer inside and see a light on in the far end of the house. I knock on the window and yell his name but nothing.

  I walk around the house and try the back door and luckily it's open. I have never really come to his house before; he's normally at mine, waiting for me. I peer inside and yell his name but nothing. What if he has a guest?

  I need to stay here; it doesn't help that I don’t have any clothes on. I walk further in and decide to go upstairs, he will understand once I tell him what happened. I need to cover myself up. I open the first door I see and it’s a bathroom so I walk to the next and when I finally find his room, I notice he isn’t there; his bed is still made so he's not asleep.

  Where is he?

  I go straight to his closet and grab a shirt and put it on. I would wear a pair of his pants but I know they wouldn’t fit. At least I’m more decent now. I look around his room and notice a few photo frames. I go to them and smile when I see pictures of us, see pictures of me and my family. I keep looking around and I see a picture of me in my bathing suit near my pool. Wonder when he took that?

  I head back out of the room and go downstairs, maybe he went out. I could make myself comfortable until he comes back. I go to the kitchen to make myself a drink when I see loads of empty cans of beer and empty bottles of vodka. I pick up a bottle and place it back down. I don’t think he will like if I keep being nosey.

  He has a life, he probably had a few friends over. I start to head back to the living room when I see more pictures of him and me hanging on the walls. This place is so neat and tidy, everything cream and brown, but the only thing that makes this place homey are the photos. I notice I am in every single one.

  I hear
a noise and turn and realize it's coming from the basement. The hairs on the back of my neck stand up but not in a good way. Maybe he's hurt, what if someone is here and hurting him? Maybe that’s why I'm getting this feeling. I walk to the basement door and listen for any movement. When I do, I pause on what I should do. If it is an intruder I need to defend myself.

  I quickly go back to the kitchen and grab one of the empty bottles, I could knock them over the head with it. I hold onto the neck of the bottle and move quietly back to the door; it’s a good thing they never heard me come in.

  I walk back to the door and open it slowly, seeing stairs going down. I hate that I've watched so many horror movies; I know this never ends well, but I need to do something if he is hurt. I know he would do it for me. I take a deep breath and walk down. I keep walking and when I get to the bottom, I see a dim light shining in the middle of the room. When my eyes adjust to the lightening, I look around and I can’t believe what I'm seeing. I accidently drop the bottle and it bounces off the floor. I see him, standing there, and he turns his head and looks up at me.

  I wake up panting, and my head is killing me. How much did I drink last night? Obviously not enough to dream about the day that changed my life forever. I look around and see I’m in my own bed, fully clothed. God, I can't even remember how I got back home.

  I see my phone on the side and grab it to see if I have any messages. I know the one person I need to talk to is Jonny but he hasn’t contacted me. I normally get a text from him to see if I got home okay, but nothing. I lay my head back down on the pillow and groan.

  Why did I have to tell him that I wanted him? I told him to own me and I thought he would be happy. He was about to kiss me; I know he was. Did Caron scare him off? No, he wouldn’t let a person stand in his way if he wanted something, so why is he being like this?

  I decide to send him a text wishing him luck on his first day and to see if he wanted to meet up for dinner after to celebrate. I keep checking my phone, but nothing. Maybe he’s busy. I try and lift myself up, but I groan again as the room starts to spin.