“Wait, T.J.!” She stood and watched as the force of her shout out triggered a jolt in his neck and shoulders. His back was still turned to her. His hand gripped the door handle so tight she thought he might twist it off.
“Forgive me,” she whispered.
When she saw his face, she saw his tears. Of course she’d never seen him cry before. They’d spent most of their time either jousting, angling for position, or sparking off each other. Even when she didn’t trust his friendship with Frankie, the passion between them had been strong.
Was she grown up enough for this big, strong man with a heart the size of all San Diego? Was she ready for the next great adventure? Was she ready to keep the memory of Frankie beside her as she made her life with this man, who she now knew loved her so completely she’d never need to feel alone again?
And could she handle it if anything happened to T.J.? Would it be worth the incredible pain of possibly losing him in order to live with him in the here and now?
The answer was yes. He was waiting for that answer. He deserved that answer, she thought as she walked slowly up to him.
“Yes. T.J, I’ve been a fool. I need your forgiveness. I need your love. I need you.”
He gathered her in his arms. “I’m right here, baby. Nothing to forgive. Never going to leave you. Never.”
She knew he’d keep his promise until his dying day. And she would too.
Chapter Fifteen
‡
T.J. WOKE UP with a start, and then remembered, unlike the last few mornings he’d awakened, all was well. Finally well.
Shannon’s warm pregnant body was spooned in front of him. Her hair was all over the pillow, with his nose buried in that space he loved at the base of her skull, the place where her scent was strongest, fine baby hairs tickling his cheeks and sending shivers down his spine. He’d never felt as connected to anyone in his life. His hand smoothed over her giant belly, loving the feel of her ripeness and her motherhood. He couldn’t wait to see the baby Frankie had placed there in her tummy, to love that little girl and let her know what a wonderful father she had. He promised to make sure she knew about Frankie. He could feel Frankie’s love all around him now.
Shannon stirred. Then she pulled his hand up to her breast, turning her face to his lips, coaxing him to touch her cheeks. “Good morning, sweetheart,” he whispered.
Her little moan told him she was sleepily aroused. He didn’t want to be too urgent with her, so large with child, but his need was never-ending. He was rewarded when her hand dove down between them, and she gripped his shaft.
“I love how you’re ready all the time, T.J.”
“Anyone around you would be ready all the time, Shannon. Would be a fuckin’ freak of nature not to be, honey.” She squeezed him, and he sighed into her ear. “Sorry for the swearing, but sometimes…” She squeezed him again, and he couldn’t think straight.
“You can swear all you like to me, T.J., as long as it’s in bed. I love it when you tell me you like to fuck me. That’s not swearing. It turns me on.”
“Thank God. We’re both blessed with the potty mouth gene.”
“Should I take your cock in my mouth?”
“Um. Would you?”
“I’d love to.”
Sure as shit, she slid down the bed, her nipples leaving a tingling sensation when they rubbed along his lower abdomen, and then pertly nestled against his thighs as she took him between her lips and sucked.
He laced his fingers through her mass of brown hair at his chest. He slid one hand down to her cheek and mouth and felt where her lips covered and pleasured him. Her belly nudged its way between his legs when he separated his knees. Warm pregnant Shannon was the most exciting sexual partner he’d ever known. This unexpected pleasure was something that filled all the gaping holes in his soul.
She was moaning, coaxing him harder, and working to make him spill, ravenous with that tongue of hers.
“Baby, love this, baby,” he whispered. He pulled the hair from her face so he could see her. “Love watching you going down on me Shannon.”
She smiled, pulled her mouth to his tip and sucked as her eyes gave him a sultry smile that ignited the bed sheets. He was so damned lucky. She loved like she lived, with a full heart and spirit. She had some magic he’d never felt before with any other woman, as if being around her would be just plain good for him. That her essence was good for him. Made him a stronger, better man. This gave him more than the erotic pleasure he craved, it gave him life itself.
She took his seed, drawing every drop from him and then asking for more. She was writhing on the bed as he spurted, taking him deep. Her fingers clutched his butt cheeks as she pulled him to her. When he was done, she kissed his thighs and smoothed her hands up his lower abdomen, kissing him all the way to his belly button. Then she snuggled under his chin as he pulled the covers over them both.
He reveled in the warmth between them, the way they just seemed so right for each other. They’d come together like two comets in the sky that should have exploded on impact, but instead fused together and became a brilliant supernova. The bright light of their love was strong, their desire fierce. He’d always known Shannon was like this, but that she could be like this with him, well that was the real miracle.
He rubbed his fingers against her shoulder while he thought about all the dumb things he and Frankie had done together, all the times he had made Shannon furious with him. Frankie always seemed to walk away unscathed, leaving him to battle with Shannon. Now he saw why. He and Shannon were so much alike they were the same side of the same coin. Her intensity was what he craved as sure as he loved that in himself.
He could tell by her breathing she wasn’t going to fall asleep.
“What do you want to do today, sweetheart?” he asked.
“Um. This,” she said, kissing and flicking a tongue over his nipple.
“You surprise me, sweetheart.”
“Didn’t anyone ever tell you that a woman has lusty thoughts when she’s pregnant? She has certain needs?”
She looked up at him, and yes, he could see it in her eyes.
“Love those needs. You can show them all you like.”
She smiled and snuggled her face under his chin. “We won’t be able to do this too much longer. But we can for now. I want all I can get while I feel I can.”
“I want to be careful too.”
“You’re careful, T.J. You’re the most tender lover I’ve ever had.” She looked up at him again, and he was nearly hard already.
He chuckled. No one had ever told him that.
“What’s so funny?”
“I’m not normally known for my tenderness, honey, but with you, it’s just the way I love to be.”
“Because I’m carrying a baby, T.J. Our baby, little Courtney. We’ll love her together. And then maybe later, you can show me some of your other side.”
Her eyes called to him again, daring him to summon his strength. He couldn’t wait until after the baby, when he could exhaust her and make her bones turn to rubber.
SHANNON WANTED HIM to move in right away. She dressed in one of Frankie’s big shirts and her drawstring pants and announced she was going to help him move. That day.
“No hurry on all this, Shannon. I can get it. Not like there’s a ton of stuff.”
“All the better to do it now. And besides, I’m big, or haven’t you noticed?” She pulled her shirt up, and damn, every time she showed him her bare tummy with the belly button that had started becoming an outie he grew hard. He silently cursed himself, but she had such an enormous effect on him, he could hardly be in the same room with her without getting hard.
T.J. promised he’d get things moved over in the afternoon.
“No. We. Do. It. Now.”
“Shannon, honey, my place is—”
“I know. A bachelor pad. You probably never anticipated having to entertain me there.”
“I never entertain there period.” Even before Fran
kie had married Shannon, the two of them had little in the way of furniture, using cardboard boxes for tables where they cleaned their weapons while watching the TV set perched atop some fruit crates. They hadn’t bothered to buy a couch, chairs, or even a dinette set. But they did have the biggest TV they could afford and a gas-fired barbeque. Frankie’s room was bare, since T.J. hadn’t had time to get another roommate.
When they got to the complex, T.J. tried one more time to ask her to stay in the truck while he went inside and got his things. The answer was the same.
First thing he noticed was the smell coming from the brown bag left by the front door since he hadn’t invested in a garbage can. He’d left remnants of a sandwich and a sour half-quart of milk. He’d not turned on the AC because he had to pay the electric bill, which was not part of the lease. He never left it on, because he never knew when he’d be back home.
Shannon went over to the sliding glass door and opened it, looking for a non-existent screen. She quirked up an eyebrow.
“Football accident. Screen is downstairs in the carport, a little bent.”
She walked to his efficiency kitchen. T.J. tried to place his body between her vision and the sink full of dishes.
“Shannon, stop checking me out.”
She glanced down at his package. “I wasn’t checking you out, but come to think of it, that might not be a very bad idea.” She slid over to him and placed her palm warmly against him and smiled. “Nice, T.J. I can see all this turns you on too. Like playing house?”
“Seriously, Shannon, let’s just get this stuff out of here and get out. You don’t have to look over everything, do you?”
She stepped as close as she could to him, her belly being the obvious impediment. She squeezed and pressed her palm against the hardened ridge of his shaft. “What are you worried about, T.J.? We’re all friends here, very good friends.”
He was having a hard time liking it, but his groin loved the massage her strong little hand was giving him. Damn, he was filled with such confusing thoughts and feelings. A real mixture of dread and lust. He allowed himself to be led while she had her way with him. He was powerless to stop it.
“Show me your bedroom. Now,” she demanded.
If she hadn’t been so pregnant, he’d have refused and fucked her on the living room floor, but because she was rubbing that enormous belly against him, showing him her need, he took her hand and pulled her to the bedroom.
He had black sheets and a matching comforter cover. A used dresser from Goodwill stood in the corner. Other than the posters of naked women all over the walls, the room was empty. Some were just pictures of large asses and boobs. He also had a couple of pictures of women bound and trussed with black silk straps across their bulging chests.
She raised her eyebrows. “Seriously kinky, T.J. I had no idea.”
“Really, Shannon? Really? You had no fuckin’ idea?” He wasn’t sure if he was mad or excited by her perusal of the things he liked to see just before he went to bed at night. “Like I said, I don’t entertain here.”
“No. You probably like the beach, or the back of a pickup, or a motel.”
He nodded.
“I happen to like it. Turns me on, kinda.” She took off her shirt and slipped off her pants. Naked except for the huge nursing bra trying desperately to hold her breasts inside, with her bulbous tummy swaying underneath her she crawled up on his bed. Her sweet ass waited for him, her sex wet with need.
“Not here,” he whispered, fixated on the peach between her legs he so wanted to kiss.
“Here. Am I the first, T.J.?” she asked, peering around her thigh, making sure he couldn’t miss her ass. “Am I?”
“Well, yes.”
“Oh, that makes me so hot.”
“But not here.”
“Come to me baby. I need you,” she said.
Well, fuck it. He wondered if it was because she was pregnant or if the posters really did turn her on. Didn’t matter what she said, he would not be bringing any of these to their bedroom at the new house. He’d done too many unmentionable things to the sight of these posters, and there was no way he would introduce that to their world. He dropped his pants, as she backed up into him. He took hold of her hips and pulled her back onto his shaft, careful to slide in along her wet channel without forcing himself. She seemed to be getting tighter each time they’d made love. The cheeks of her rear jiggled as he gripped and released them, spreading them wider for his selfish penetration. She moaned like a cat in heat.
“Shhh. Shannon the walls are thin,” he whispered.
She let out another moan.
The woman was out of control. He hoped to God the neighbors next door, two newbie SEALs, were out.
He thought perhaps he had pushed Shannon over when she lurched forward, grabbing his pillows and then squeezing them with her arms, pushing onto him deeper. She screamed into the pillows.
Good idea, Shannon.
“You like that, baby?”
“Yes. More, T.J.”
“Glad to give you what you want, baby.” He thrust inside her so deep he thought she’d split in two.
She jumped a bit at first, and he thought he’d hurt her or the baby. But then he felt her clamp down on him as her orgasm came with terrifying speed. She plunged her face into the pillow and wailed as he pumped her deep and slow.
He arched over her and finished, holding her breasts through the heavy cotton fabric of the bra that seemed more of a BDSM torture device. He made a mental note next time to get that thing off her first. He sure wouldn’t be thinking of it later on.
Chapter Sixteen
‡
SHANNON HELPED T.J. move his meager things into the house. She was surprised it all fit into half his trunk, and recalled how Frankie’s things had been reduced to just a box as well. T.J. had more equipment than anything else. His kitchen things he’d agreed to give to whatever young SEAL would eventually take over his apartment. He had no furniture to speak of. She liked the fact that it was the man who was moving into her home with her and the baby, not the stuff he had. The man was who she wanted, not his stuff.
It moved her to see where he had spent his single days, where he and Frankie had stayed before Frankie moved in with her. The simplicity of his lifestyle and the private side of him that wasn’t displayed to anyone else turned her on. He was embarrassed about his lack of decorating skill, and yet he had shown such tenderness with the flowers he’d planted around Courtney’s playhouse and the beautiful words on the poster in her bedroom. She liked that he’d chosen to share intimate moments with her, intimate things about himself that no one else, and perhaps even none of his SEAL buddies, knew. All he showed the outside world was his equipment and the posters of naked women. She didn’t even mind that he liked to look at them before he fell asleep. Even that was sexy to her. The man was a tight package, bound up in that hard body of his. He kept his personal life guarded, not public. No trappings to weigh him down. Everything he needed was inside him.
She’d cleared out Frankie’s clothes two weeks into her mourning, knowing that it would help her heal. She’d held each one of his shirts up to her nose and inhaled his unique man scent, crying while she refolded the shirts and laid them in the box for donation. Though his clothes had been washed many times, she recalled how his scent remained, even after the man was gone.
What surprised her, as she laid T.J.’s shirts in the same drawer Frankie had used, was how comforting it was having him watch her do this little activity. She smoothed over the American flag-splashed boxers he wore, rolled up his socks in the same direction, and refolded his jeans to fit inside the shallow dresser. He let her position his clothes, ever careful to not intrude. She knew he was taking his lead from her. If she wanted it fast, he’d go fast. And fast or slow, he appeared to enjoy just watching her work out the details. She felt his respect for her private thoughts.
He took her hand, leading her to the kitchen, where he obviously felt most comfortable.
“I’m not cooking, I’m making you a salad.” His dazzling white smile sent a tickle to the top of her spine. His long fingers stroked the lettuce and caressed the tomatoes he was slicing. “You have to eat. You’ve exerted yourself this morning.” He didn’t look up at her, but maintained a Cheshire cat smile as he watched the sharp knife do its job.
“I still like watching you,” she whispered.
“I know,” he said, grinning down at the countertop, his cheeks slightly pink from a touch of shyness. “I kind of like it.” He backed up a bit so she could see the tent in his pants.
“Wonder what we’re going to do after the baby comes. We won’t be able to be so selfish with our desires, will we?”
He nodded to the bowl he was preparing for her. “I’ll definitely let you sleep a little more, Shannon. But honey, you can let me handle everything else but sleeping and feeding the baby. I want to cook for you.” That’s when she saw the deep blue of his soul. He passed the bowl across the countertop, handing her a fork.
“And here, I never pegged you for any of those domestic talents. Your kitchen couldn’t have been sparser. Where did you learn to cook so well?” she asked.
“One of my foster mothers owned a restaurant. We learned how to do all sorts of things in there.”
“Where’s your lunch?” she asked.
“I’m going to fix something after you go down for a nap.”
“What if I want you to nap with me?”
“I have a little research to do on the computer for work—which I can’t tell you about, so don’t ask, okay?”
She was hungrier than she’d thought. The crisp lettuce and fresh multicolored heirloom tomatoes looked like they’d come from a farmer’s market.
“You get these at the Friday market?”
“Glad you noticed.”
“I can’t believe you know that about me too.”
“You forget, Frankie used to talk about you all the time. We know more about you than I think even your parents do.” He shrugged. “Guys talk to pass the time. You were his favorite topic of conversation. Shit, it was much better listening to him talk about you than his sorry life. I’m sure there wasn’t a guy in the squad who minded his descriptions of all the things you liked, and the way they…” He hesitated, and then continued, “the things that turned you on, baby. Most of us had yet to find that. A woman who would love us like you loved Frankie. We could tell just by the way he described you.”
SEAL's Promise - Bad Boys of SEAL Team 3, Book 01 Page 10