by Leo Romero
I gulped. It wouldn’t take long for the werewolves to smash up the Boneheads now that they’d discovered their weakness to blunt instruments.
“Quick! Get us outta here, boyo!” Seamus urged, jumping up and down on the carriage in excitement.
I whirled on my heels and sprinted for the main gate, my heart pounding. I gritted my teeth and pumped my tired legs as hard as they would go. Behind me, the sound of shattering bones violated my ears.
I made it to the rusty gates. A surviving control panel on the wall next to them blinked at me. I hopped over to it and thumped the button. The gates eased open with a loud creak, taking their time.
I took a look over my shoulder. A werewolf had a giant rock raised high above his head. He smashed it down with an intense grunt, obliterating a poor Bonehead to pieces. Now with a lot of the skeletons defeated, attention turned my way. I gulped as multiple sets of red eyes glared right at me. And now they were hurt and pissed. Lobo roared and pointed my way.
In the next second, werewolves were pounding toward us, their tongues lolling from their mouths.
I whipped my head back toward the gates. They were still swinging open with a rusty creak. Behind us, hot grunts and growls bombarded my mind. I bounced on my heels, willing those gates to open. They opened up just enough for me to squeeze the carriage through; it jarred on the edges of the gates as I went.
I flew out of the warehouse grounds, my eyes instantly falling on my waiting Harley. I pulled up behind it. I reached down for the towing hook I’d attached to the rear, which I usually used for taking Godzilla for a spin in his small motorhome. Now it was invaluable. I hooked the carriage handlebar to my bike and jumped on the driver’s seat. By then, the gates had fully opened and out came the first of the werewolves.
Seamus yelped and jumped into the carriage for cover. I pushed down the throttle as the werewolf growled. A giant bulk of fur and muscle dominated my side for a second as I pulled away. A claw swiped the air right next to my head. The bike zipped off, causing me to pull back at the same time, taking my head out of the firing line. That claw missed me by inches, swiping nothing but air.
I puffed my cheeks in relief and checked on the buggy. It was rolling along the road on its side wheels, Seamus hanging on for dear life. Behind us, the werewolf was striding along the tarmac, saliva dripping from its lolling tongue. I straightened up and the carriage fell back on four wheels, causing Seamus to collapse safely back inside. I pushed down the throttle and the engine kicked in, pulling us away. I checked my rear view. The werewolf was still chasing, but was receding further and further into the distance. The road veered down and I picked up more speed, widening the distance between us. All the while, that carriage was rolling along, sparks flying out from beneath its rickety wheels.
We hit a bump and the carriage momentarily left the road and came smashing down again, a wheel flying off. Seamus began juddering, his small hands spread out over the gold, fearful of any of it falling out. Behind him, the werewolf had already slowed and was watching us helplessly as we left the scene. Eventually, he turned, giving up the ghost. Relief exploded in my stomach, but my heart was still pounding.
Seamus’ subsequent screams of delight punctured the night. “Woohoo, boyo!” he screeched as the carriage was dragged along the rough tarmac, sparks flying everywhere, the moon shining down on us. I thanked my lucky stars. We’d made it out of the cartel stronghold in one piece with the gold. I afforded myself a grin. Now it was time to go get Aurora and my stuff back.
Chapter 15
The baby carriage was soon all beat up from being dragged through the streets of Chicago. It would be a major pain in the ass to get it down to the Underworld, so we made a stop off at my place to get something more suitable to transport the gold. It also gave me a chance to check in on Lucy. She’d no doubt be worried about me, and even if she wasn’t, I sure as hell was worried about her.
We made it back to my apartment where it was still nighttime. I parked up and looked behind me. The carriage was almost in pieces, Seamus lying inside it like a terrified puppy. I told him to come with me into the apartment. I didn’t trust him. He might still run off with the gold. At first he wouldn’t leave it alone, so I ended up dragging him to the front door with him shouting about his gold. I told him to shut the hell up as my neighbors were trying to sleep. And they were worse than any cartel super werewolves when their sleep was disturbed.
He reluctantly came with me, his eyes fixed on that buggy. It would be cool. No one would know that beat-up old carriage was full of leprechaun gold. We entered the block and went up to my apartment on the first floor. I plucked the spare key from beneath the doormat and unlocked the front door. I pushed it open and it got jammed. My eyes widened, my heart skipping a beat. I then realized Lucy had put the latch on. Great.
I thought about banging on the door, but didn’t wanna freak Lucy. Instead, I led us back outside and looked up at the apartment block. Just as I suspected, she’d left a window slightly open. I shook my head. You put the latch on the door but leave the damn window open? Sheesh.
“Looks like more climbing for us, Shay,” I said with a sigh as I began scaling the wall. Seamus was in a hurry, so he used me as a ladder and made it up there first. He managed to push the window open fully and squeeze through. I made it up there, conscious of looking like a burglar, but how can you break into your own home? Besides, this was Chicago.
I got up there and struggled to haul myself through the window cause I was so exhausted. I gritted my teeth and strained my arms, but my body was like lead. Seamus came over and grabbed my arm. He yanked.
Pain jolted up to my shoulder. “Ow!”
“Come on, boyo, what’s wrong with ye?” He yanked harder.
“Shay, that isn’t helping,” I said as I slipped back and my legs dangled on the air. I held on with my arms, Seamus pulling at my elbow.
I sucked in a big breath and put every ounce of effort I had into heaving myself up. I lurched through the window. Seamus didn’t have time to move. I landed on top of him, crushing him into the wooden floor. I lay sprawled there, an exhausted heap, while Seamus squirmed beneath me groaning and straining.
Then, the living room light flicked on.
“What’s all the noise?” said Lucy with a yawn as she entered the room.
Our heads snapped up toward her at the same time. We froze as if caught red-handed, both of us gasping.
Lucy’s sleepy eyes flared with anger. “Midgets now?” she snarled.
I rolled my eyes toward Shay, who was squashed beneath me. “Er...” was my only response.
Lucy jammed her hands into her hips. “So, you leave me alone for days on end while you go around picking up little people, when you should be arranging my birthday! I bet you haven’t even done that, have you?”
I puffed my cheeks. “Sweetie, I’ve been unbelievably busy,” I said with a dumb chuckle.
Her eyes dulled and her head dropped in disappointment. And my heart and stomach sunk alongside it. That look killed me. Tore me to shreds. I would rather she was straight up mad with me, then it wouldn’t hurt so much.
“Well, maybe one day you’ll actually find some time for me,” she said and there wasn’t anger in her voice any more, only regret and dejection. “I won’t hold my breath,” she added before whirling and storming out of the room, slamming the door behind her. The noise sliced through my mind like razor blades.
“Sweetie!” I said, but she was gone. “Sweetie, come back! It’s not my fault. I’ve been...busy.” I looked down at Seamus, who grinned back at me. Anger swelled in my chest. “You!” I sneered.
Seamus shook his head, nonplussed.
I jumped up to my feet. I raced out to the hallway, right as Lucy’s bedroom door slammed shut and the lock turned. I dashed to her room. “Sweetie,” I said, knocking on the door. “Sweetie, please listen. It’s all a misunderstanding. I’ve had a lot on lately.” I rubbed my head. “Too much.” Silence responded. I started getting frustrated and
angry. I huffed and knocked harder. “Lucinda! Lucinda! Open the door. This is your father speaking. Open the door this instant!” Silence. My heart caved and my shoulders dropped. Why did this stuff have to happen to me?
I trudged back into the lounge where Seamus was dusting himself off. “Women! Pah, they’re all the same, boyo. Us men are better off without em, lemme tell ye.”
I lumbered over to the mirror above the mantelpiece. I let out a hot sigh as I stared glumly at my reflection. My tired, despondent face stared back at me. Could I ever get anything right with Lucy?
I grabbed hold of the mantelpiece and my head slumped between my shoulders. “I’ve tried so hard, Shay. Tried so hard for her. It’s not easy for a guy to raise a daughter all on his lonesome. Especially when you got a life as crazy as mine. I try my darndest to keep all the madness of being a half angel bounty hunter away from her, but it ain’t easy. It seems the harder I try, the more I mess things up. All I want is for her to be happy. Just to be—”
There was a yelp of fear behind me, snapping my sentence in half. I spun to be met with Seamus running around in circles like his ass was on fire. Chasing him was Godzilla, his tongue feverishly sliding in and out between his lips.
“Get this beast away from me, Gabriel!” Seamus yelled, his little limbs pumping hard.
I grabbed my forehead. “Oh man. Zilla, leave him. Come on.”
Godzilla carried on chasing, his eyes glowing with desire.
“Zilla, he isn’t food.”
“He thinks I am!” Seamus replied in between wheezes.
I watched them both in bemusement doing laps of the lounge. I shook my head. Man, my life sucks! I stepped forward and intervened, snatching up Godzilla and lifting him up. He thrashed his legs on the air, his tongue darting in and out of his mouth. I could almost hear him saying ‘lemme at him!’
Seamus came to a stop and grabbed his knees. “Get…that…thing away from me!” he said while panting.
I gave Zilla a kiss on the lips. “Aww, he’s not a thing. You’re not a thing, Zilla. Don’t listen to the mean little lep.”
Seamus pointed up at Godzilla. “That indeed is a thing, boyo. And it’s a nasty, rotten thing!”
I put a hand over one of Godzilla’s ears. “Hey, he can hear you, and he’s very sensitive.”
“Sensitive, me leprechaun backside!”
I chuckled as I went and put Godzilla out in the hallway and closed the door to the lounge, locking him out. “There, happy now?” I said to Seamus.
“I’ll be happy when I’m back with me gold.”
I grabbed an old gym bag that I had lying around. “Well that’ll be soon, but we got a deal remember?”
Seamus’ face turned dark. “Aye, we got a deal, fallen angel,” he said with distain, almost spitting the words out.
He was still sore about having to give up his gold to me. Ah, he’d get over it.
I held open the bag. “Come on, hop in.”
Seamus jumped inside. I held the bag up high as I headed for the door. Seamus stared warily over the top of the bag as I opened the door. Godzilla came rushing in, his head spinning left and right. Seamus yelped. I chuckled. Godzilla looked up and spotted the lep peeking down at him. He rose up on his hind legs and began scraping the air with his claws. Seamus ducked down in fear.
I laughed as I exited the room. “See ya later, Zilla,” I said as I went by. My eyes fell on Lucy’s door. My grin melted. With a sigh, I went up to it and gave it a light knock. “Sweetie. I...” My eyes fell downward. I took a deep breath. “I gotta go out for a while.” I felt shitty just saying it. It’s what she’d heard all her life, but what could I do? Silence responded. “I’ll be back soon, I promise. Just put the door on the latch again after I leave.” She never said anything back. Pain stabbed at my heart. What kind of father leaves his daughter to fend for herself?
I looked down, despondent. Seamus was still cowering from Godzilla. I shook my head and headed for the front door. I couldn’t dwell on things, too much was at stake. I’d make things up to Lucy, I promised.
We got back out to the bike and the carriage where we filled the gym bag with white gold coins. Seamus counted them out one by one, his eyes rolling in a mix of pleasure and lament. I watched him with sorrow swelling in my heart. The little guy really loved his gold more than anything. The way he caressed each coin like it was a long-lost lover, the faint grin on his lips as he counted in a cracked voice. He even kissed one or two as he went. At one point I thought he was going to cry. I checked my watch. As gut-wrenching as it was to witness Seamus counting his gold for the last time, we needed to get going.
Finally, he counted the last coin. “One hundred,” he said with a sigh that caused his shoulders to slump. He grabbed the handles of the bag and lifted them up toward me, his face pointed in the opposite direction. “I enjoyed every second of counting me gold, fallen angel. But a deal’s a deal. Here, take them.”
I grabbed the handles and went to take the bag from him, but he wouldn’t let go. I yanked and his grip loosened. He spun away, tears jumping from his eyes.
I rolled my eyes. “Come on, Shay. Man up. Or lep up, would’ya?”
“I can’t, Gabriel,” he blubbered. “What’s a leprechaun without his gold?”
“Don’t worry, Shay. You won’t lose a single coin.”
His head snapped around to meet mine, his watery eyes brimming with hope. “What do ye mean?”
“I mean, I’ll make sure you get your gold back. You don’t think I’m that much of a heartless bastard, do ya? That I’ll steal a lep’s gold? No, I’m just gonna borrow it. This is the bargaining chip that’ll get Aurora and my stuff back from Bracken. Once I’m done, your gold will be yours again.”
Seamus’ eyes flashed with joy. He spun in a circle, waving his hands on the air. “Yippee! I knew it! I knew you weren’t as coldhearted as they say.”
I frowned. “As who say?”
Seamus froze. “Er... No one.”
I grumbled under my breath and turned away. “Let’s go.” I led us out onto the Chicago streets, Seamus skipping along behind me, jabbering about his gold like a kid nattering about their favorite toy. I tried my best to ignore him.
There was an Underworld manhole nearby that I knew of. We went straight to it, down the ladder and found ourselves back in the tunnel leading to the entrance. I stopped and inspected the air; a line of glittering light hung on it, a tiny tear. The remnants of the portal I created in Bracken’s castle to escape. A nice piece of luck. I pulled out my joker card and with the utmost care and precision reopened the tear. The portal opened up and Bracken’s castle waited beyond. I took a deep breath before I stepped through. I immediately raised my hands in the air, lifting the bag of gold. Seamus hopped through behind me. The guards standing to attention left and right jumped into action.
“Halt, intruder!” one of them shouted.
“It’s okay, guys. I come in peace,” I said as spears and swords were shoved in my face. I noticed some of the fae guards were sporting bruises from their encounter with Milos. “Sorry about that,” I said with an awkward grin. Their faces remained stern. Bruised, but stern.
“What now?” came a growl from somewhere beyond all the guards sweating me. Bracken came stomping into the chamber, Aurora following like his shadow, an inquisitive look on her face.
“Gabe!” she said once she saw it was me.
“Hey, Aurora. Told you I’d be back.”
A grin spread up her cheeks. Bracken spun to face her, and the grin vanished in the blink of an eye, her head bowing.
“Stone!” Bracken growled, his gaze fixed on his daughter. He turned to face me. “You made the biggest mistake of your life returning here. Your suffering will be the stuff of legends.”
I sighed. “Yeah, I get it, you’re pissed. I don’t blame you. If someone used a Minotaur to smash up my home, I’d be angry as well.”
Bracken clenched his teeth and growled.
“But, I got a pr
oposition,” I said.
“Not interested!” Bracken snarled.
I gave him an exaggerated nod. “That’s okay, Bracken. I’ll just throw this bag of white gold back through that portal there.”
Bracken froze. “White gold?” he echoed, an eyebrow raised in intrigue.
I tongued my lower lip while nodding my head. “That’s right, Bracken, my man. A hundred coins of the purest white gold you’ve ever seen.” I lowered my hands slow, showing the guards I meant no harm. I placed the bag on the floor and opened it up for them to see. They peered into the bag, their eyes lighting up.
“He’s not lying, your highness!” one of them said over his shoulder in a breathless voice. One of them went to reach into the bag and I slapped his hand. The others all pushed their weapons in toward me.
I remained calm. “Look but don’t touch,” I said to them, zipping up the bag. I stood upright and stared at them all at once. “Clear the way please.”
They glanced over their shoulders at their king. Bracken gave them the order and they parted.
“Thanks,” I said as I sauntered toward Bracken, Seamus holding onto my thigh. I stopped a few feet away from the Fae King.
“Show me,” he ordered.
I opened up the bag and his green eyes widened.
“The gold of a lep is always the best, Bracken,” I told him as he stared. “Imagine that pure-white water flowing over your green skin. Easing your aches and pains, caressing you in white, milky goodness.”
Bracken began scratching his back and running his hands down his thighs, his lips in a pout. He was imagining the feel of that water with those white-gold-laced bathing salts all over his body, which was good. Keep going, Bracken, my man. Keep imagining.
Bracken rubbed himself some more before he shivered in delight, his lips trembling. “Oooh!” he gasped. He balled his hands up into fists. “What is your proposition, fallen angel?”
“A game of cards.”
“And the prize?”
“My weapons for a start. If I win, you hand them over, you grant myself and Seamus O’Hare our freedom, and you let Aurora go.”