by T. C. Edge
"I...I do," I say. "But..." I halt my words, trying to gather my thoughts. The voice of the Prime comes again.
"We understand your doubts, child. We know it won't be easy. But this is your destiny. This is your purpose." They smile as one, brightening my heart, dismissing my doubts. "We have known of your coming here for a long time. We have foreseen it. There is no stepping from this path, dearest Daughter. It is yours to tread, yours to own. You will achieve greatness among us."
I stand there before them, my head filling with visions. Visions of me, wreathed in fire, looking over the wilderness. Me, a warrior, a weapon, helping to make the city safe from invaders. From those who would see us all suffer. The Fringe and Olympus, they form a symbiotic relationship. I have seen both sides of that now. Without one, the other would stumble and fall. The Fringe provide tribute. Olympus protects them in return, securing their borders, keeping them safe.
My life has ever been simple, my purpose menial. Now I'm being asked to rise higher than all others, to perform a task that will, perhaps, save thousands. How can I deny such an honour? How can I deny...them?
They look at me, and as I did when I met them before, I know I'll do anything they desire of me. I am theirs now, a dutiful daughter to perfect parents. If this is the task they've assigned me, I will see it done.
But then I think of the other Heralds I've seen. All of them men, older, grizzled, weapons of devastating power. The likes of Perses, a totem of a man, the depths of his power only hinted at to me so far. How can I stand alongside such figures? How can I possibly become one of them?
And above all, how can I kill?
"It will take time," comes the single voice of the Prime once again, as though reading my thoughts, knowing my mind. "Time for you to adapt. Yes, taking life is never easy, Amber, but it is essential. You have killed before. You know how it feels."
My mind flares with those blackened bodies, the victims of my explosive awakening before the residents of the city. Over a dozen men and women died that day. I lost control, and others paid for it.
"No death will be harder than those, child." I look up, feel my shame over that day gradually drawn away. "You blame yourself, though you shouldn't. It was an accident. It wasn't your fault."
Mother reaches forward, Father staying back. She takes my hand and squeezes it softly, easing tears from my eyes. "Killing is never easy," she says, just her. "But those you take from this point on will only be in protection of this city, and these people. There is great honour in that. They will not bring guilt. They will inspire only a feeling of triumph within you."
"Soon, you will understand," says Father, drawing my eyes. He steps forward as Mother steps back. I arch my eyes up a little higher to meet his, a pale blue, clear as the purest water. "You will find Herald Perses to be the perfect guide. He will steer you on in this new task."
"Perses," I whisper, thinking of the great man. "He's to guide me?"
"Yes," Father says. "Son Perses will take you under his wing. Listen to him, and learn from him. You will leave with him tomorrow."
"Tomorrow." My chest tightens. "Where?"
"He has work beyond the city," Father says. "And the work of our Heralds is never done. He will come for you tomorrow afternoon. Be ready."
Mother steps back forward, eyes scanning me up and down. She joins Father's side. They become one again.
"This summit is now open to you," they tell me. "You may come and go as you please. Fear not, you may visit with your sister whenever you wish. We know how important family is."
They smile at that, looking at me in an almost...reminiscing way. "You look so like Daughter Alberta," they continue softly. "Yet you will ascend above her, soar higher than she ever did. If you see her on your travels, please tell her we haven't forgotten her, and never will. She will always be thought of fondly here, despite everything that happened."
They begin to step away, not turning, moving back and up the steps to their thrones. I stand, fixed, as they smile down upon me. And then, bowing, I turn and move back out of the temple, across the plateau, and down the steps.
Towards my purpose.
8
I return to my apartment in the company of the Overseer, the first light of dawn gradually approaching as we reach my room, and step out onto my balcony. I sense a slight change in the energy between us, our relationship evolving with my sudden elevation.
Now, as a fledgling Herald of War, I stand at his shoulder, perhaps even slightly above him in rank. Our previous association, mimicking the master-apprentice relationship, is now over. Though I will continue, where possible, to take on his advice and paternal guidance, we are now equals, aligned as leaders within this great city.
He bows at me there under the fading moonlight, a hardly suppressed smile on his face.
"Well, Amber. Here we are," he muses, eyes twinkling, keen and penetrative. His smile widens slowly, before he gazes off towards the city, shining beautifully as dawn draws near. "This city is now yours. Yours to protect and serve. You couldn't have hoped for a higher calling. And I...I couldn't be happier for you." He looks back at me, nodding gently. "How do you feel, Herald Amber?"
It is the first calling of my new title. It doesn't sound quite right. No, that isn't correct. It doesn't sound right at all.
"I guess it will all take some getting used to," I say. I shake my head. "I don't feel like a Herald. I don't feel as if I fit among them."
"Nonsense," the Overseer says lightly. "We all have to start somewhere, and Herald Perses will take you under his wing. Oh, I've tried to lead you, guide you to this point, but my role in your development is now done. Perses will take the reins now. You couldn't possibly hope for a better teacher. Be a good student, Amber, and you will quickly find that this new purpose of yours fits like a tailored suit."
"I...I hope so," I say. My eyes turn up the hill, wreathed in cloud. A hill that is now open to me, its steps a path I can tread whenever I please. "It's all just happening so quickly."
"And that makes you doubt it?"
"Well...question it," I say.
"Good," the Overseer says. "To question is to show that you are still sane, Amber. You remain of sound mind, and prove that your thoughts are your own. I have known our Father and Mother for many, many years. I know them better, perhaps, than anyone. They do not wish for their favoured Children to become mindless slaves, to never question their place in this world. No, they always give a choice. They allow free will to breathe."
"Do they?" I ask softly. "The way they make me feel, I..." I shake my head. "Like I'd do anything for them. Is that...really me?"
"Yes, it is you," the Overseer says, laying a wizened hand on my shoulder, squeezing lightly. My eyes return to his. "The Prime have unique gifts, that is obvious enough to you now. They inspire feelings of great joy within us, but don't have the power to change our hearts and minds. They only enliven those feelings that already exist inside us. They let them flourish and bloom, and show us the way forward. You, Amber, feel like you wish to serve them because that is the truth. They inspire that feeling within you. But if you chose to leave, to abandon this city, to return to your life back in Pine Lake...well, that is your choice. You still have free will, Amber. Remember that."
I nod slowly, and take a nervous breath.
"I don't want to leave," I say. "And I do want to serve them, serve this city and these lands. The people I love are here. I suppose, in some way, I've been trying to protect them all my life. Now I can do it on a grander scale."
"Oh yes, the grandest scale of all." He gently pulls on my shoulder, turning me back towards him. "My advice is this," he says softly. "Go with Herald Perses. Get a taste for his world, and see if you like it. If it tastes bitter on your tongue, then perhaps you're not meant for this life." A wry smile lifts on his lips. "I sincerely doubt that will be the case. The Prime...they have a knack for knowing just where someone's talents, and desires, truly lie."
He draws me, in that moment,
into a light embrace, before stepping back once again. Above, the skies start to brighten, the onset of dawn softly advancing.
"I understand you're to have lunch with Lady Felina and your sister today," he says. "I regret you may not have the time, Amber. Perhaps a breakfast engagement would suit you better. Would you like to see Lilly before you leave?"
I nod absently. "I don't know if Felina will be available..."
"She will be for a Herald," the Overseer says. "I will inform her personally that you will be arriving within a couple of hours. Try to get some rest, Amber. If you can."
He winks at me, before slipping quietly away, gliding upon old legs towards the door.
I visit with Lilly and Lady Felina, as promised, a couple of hours later, transferred there by Marlow. Naturally, the High Worthy is overwhelmed by my news, taking the art of respectful service to a new level. The poor man seems beset by nerves, as though my elevation to a higher rank has changed me as a person, and any step out of line will lead to a dreadful punishment.
Well, he's wrong. I'm still me. Just, with a new shiny rank and purpose. Of course, the title is somewhat intimidating, given its intention, but I'm trying not to think too much about that right now. The idea of bringing death to others, whether threats or not, doesn't sit too easily in my stomach quite yet.
I find High Worthy Kitchener a little less awestruck than Marlow, his slightly sardonic manner suggesting he's rarely fazed by much. I imagine if a 'real' Herald of War like Perses were to walk in, things would be different. It's probably hard to reconcile the concept of me, a girl of seventeen, taking on such a lofty, deadly, function.
I meet with Lady Felina and Lilly in the same place I did before. A breakfast buffet has been put on by several other Worthies, a banquet fit for a king. Or queen. I step in, Fire-Blood robes gleaming, regal. The Worthies in the room immediately stiffen and bow. Nearby, Felina leaps from her perch and hurries towards me. Lilly, in her role as Felina's personal aid, follows behind in a similar manner as Marlow does with me.
It is to my great relief that Felina's reaction to my presence is characteristically light-hearted. As a Lady of high rank, she's evidently rubbed shoulders with the city's best and brightest, and isn't exactly intimidated by a title.
"Well well," she says with a smirk. "I guess I should be bowing to you now, Herald Amber. Oh, how things change."
"You...know already?" I ask.
I had expected to deliver the news myself. It seems that the Overseer has already done so.
"Oh yes, etiquette calls for such a thing," Felina says, hiding a yawn behind her palm. "Apologies. We had to get up earlier than normal to prepare."
"For me?"
"Of course. You are a Herald now, Amber. The Overseer needed to inform us of that so we could prepare accordingly. This isn't the mere arrival of a Primary Daughter of the Prime. You honour us with your presence, Lady Herald."
She bows, observing the etiquette, though still doing so with her usual good humour, evidenced by that playful smile on her lips. Around the room, the Worthies bow again. I notice movement behind Felina, and find Lilly doing the same.
"Would you leave us alone?" I turn to the Worthy girls, and to the High Worthies lingering by the door. They all react immediately, scuttling off, Kitchener ushering them through the door before doing so himself. Within a couple of moments, the three of us are alone once more.
"OK, enough of that etiquette," I say. "Can we just be how we were a few days ago?"
Felina smiles. "Of course, Lady Herald," she says lightly. "Whatever you wish."
I roll my eyes. "Lilly?" I look directly at my sister, see the wonder blossoming on her face once more. "Oh not this again..."
"What?" she croaks.
"That look. Remember what we said? I'm just your sister, OK? Nothing else."
"Except a Herald of War," Lilly says, excited, childlike grin erupting on her face. "I can't believe it."
"In a...a good way?" I ask.
"Of course in a good way! I mean, we used to look at Collector Ceres as someone so important..." She darts her eyes up at Lady Felina, apologetic. "And, he still is, obviously," she says. "All Children of the Prime are import..."
"Oh, Lilly, stop. Collector Ceres is a pathetic excuse for a Son of the Prime," Felina says, eyes narrowing. "You don't need to censor your words around me, least not regarding him."
"I can't tell you how good it makes me feel to hear you say that," I say, grinning. "I've despised Ceres for years."
"And now you outrank him to a significant degree. In fact, you did so as soon as you even became a Chosen candidate. As a Herald you could probably order him dead if you wished."
The thought crosses my mind, bringing a sly smile. "Sounds tempting. Only if I get to do it myself."
"I'm certain that can be arranged, Lady Herald," smiles Felina. "Now," she looks to Lilly, "what were you saying my dear?"
"Um, nothing really. Just that...Amber's a Herald now. It's...so exciting..."
"That it is, child," Felina says. "And what a strange world we live in. I must say, this is the first instance I've experienced personally of members of the same family, and sisters of such similar age and appearance no less, following such different paths. Lovely Lilly here, a Worthy. Beautiful Amber, a Herald. Social convention calls for us to see you so differently. But I don't." She looks at me. "Forgive me, Amber, but I don't see the great spaces between the two of you as others might."
"I couldn't hope for anything more," I tell her, grateful. "Lilly and I aren't so different. I'm glad you see that."
"Well I don't." I turn down to look at my sister, eyes hiding behind a frown. "I'm just a girl, Amber. You're something so much more. I would never expect people to see us the same. Never."
A brief silence envelops the room, Felina and I sharing a look. Like many of the higher residents of the city, she seems to be quite aware of the truth; that they -we - are not truly divine beings, merely a result of manmade, genetic engineering and mutation. New gods, perhaps, but not real deities.
Lilly doesn't see it that way. Like all those across the Fringe, she worships these people, and my ascension has lifted me into their ranks. To put me alongside her, she will feel, is an insult to all the Children of the Prime, and the life of dedication and service she has led.
And, for now at least, I must accept that.
"Yes, you're right," Felina eventually says. "Amber is more, child. The things she can do, the path she is on. Oh, she's something very special indeed." She leaves it there, appeasing the Worthy under her charge, and doing so with no lack of tact and skill. Lilly nods forcefully at her words, showing a bit of the girl I knew back home - pious to a fault and dedicated beyond her years - and then begins to relax. "So, food," Felina finishes, turning towards the buffet tables. "It would be a shame to let it go to waste. How much time do you have, Amber?"
"Not long," I say, letting out a breath, the idea of leaving this city both exciting and nerve-wracking at the same time. "I'll be leaving this afternoon. I'm not sure exactly when, so should be back before midday."
"Well, plenty of time to catch up, then."
"But...what about your lunch engagement?"
"My lunch engagement was with you, Amber."
"But I thought...well, I thought it was with others as well. A means of trying to assimilate me into your social circle. Or something."
"Ah, you saw right through me," Felina smiles. "The others will have to wait. Matters of social preening aren't of great consequence to you right now, I suspect. The work of the Heralds of War is the highest calling we have. The most important work of all."
"Defending the city," Lilly whispers, eyes lit in wonder. "That's what you'll be doing now. The city, and the Fringe. You'll be a hero, Amber."
She smiles at me, a look of pride in her eyes. No jealousy. No envy at our divergent paths. No, not Lilly. Just an appreciation of what I'm becoming. And that look of pride; I've never seen it before.
It lights m
y heart bright.
And right there, I feel the subdued ache of doubt at this calling fade away. I see the look on my sister's face, and I embrace it.
Protect the people. Protect my loved ones.
Become the hero my sister wants me to be.
I spend a couple of hours in the company of my sister and her mistress, enjoying the burgeoning camaraderie of our little trio just as I did several days before. I forget, for a time, that we're all walking upon different paths now, existing on different planes. My sister, a lowly Worthy. Lady Felina, a Primary Farsight. And me, now a Herald of War in training, the keys to the Sacred Stairs in my pocket, the world opening up wide before me.
In any other setting, our unusual little gathering there in Felina's apartment might seem strange, and most likely inappropriate. Yes, Lilly continues to diligently observe her position at times, but she also relaxes at others, dining alongside us, even sharing in the occasion joke or putting across her opinion on a subject with far more force than a Worthy ever should.
Here, in this lovely sitting room, we create a little sanctuary. A place where all titles can be mostly stripped away, and the simple pleasures of conversation, dining, and laughter be enjoyed. I wonder whether other master-servant relationships have evolved as such. Whether others like Felina allow their Worthies and High Worthies the chance to be their equals, if only for a time.
I muse on that point when I say my goodbyes, leaving Lilly and Felina with a hug and a promise that I'll return to them soon, tell of the adventures I'm set to see. They smile, side by side, as I move back down the hall, and I even notice Felina place her hand on Lilly's shoulder, comforting her, stepping beyond her remit as mistress to my sister.
A sweet image, and one that comforts me too. An image, perhaps, of something I'd never expected to witness in this city, something I didn't think existed. Once I'd considered the Worthy only slaves. Now I see that those lines aren't as rigidly drawn as I'd thought. Many are happy and well taken care of. Many of those they serve are kind-hearted and generous, as Felina has quickly proven herself to be.