“And we need the Elders to tell us the truth of what happened!” Talis said in a strong, almost angry voice. The group noticed his raised energy. Jasmine held his hand again, gently massaging his clenched fingers.
“I felt Lillian was holding back again when we talked to her,” Joshua added, supporting Talis’s comments. “There is something not quite right, some hidden truth that we need to know.”
“And someone wanted us dead or stuck in the other dimension because of it,” Talis said as he looked at Joshua intensely. They both acknowledged that possible fact.
Layia added,” I understand your concerns, my friends, as I feel there are secrets not being told to us. Yet I believe Lillian is leading us to some truth, as are your grandfather’s journals, perhaps.” She looked at Talis. “His journals may also be holding residual energy that may be affecting us.”
“Yes, that makes sense,” Talis noted. “The old bookbinder said that the journals could hold energy from the past. I have felt that powerful connection to the past. This may have unlocked part of the shadow energy that is disrupting us.”
Layia nodded to Talis and went on. “What Lillian is reminding us of, though, is that we need to experience both the light and darkness to be whole. All energy is part of the essence of the universe. Our acceptance of this duality and this journey is key. We must ground ourselves with the physical. We must plant our roots deep within Mother Earth as we continue to connect with the heavens. Earth and spirit become one through us. We as humans, are the conduit.”
“And how does this relate to the hidden truths?” Talis asked her in a thoughtful tone.
“That the pain we now feel and the mistrust is part of the journey. It is part of our human experience,” Layia said with wisdom. “If indeed the Elders and Lillian are not revealing the entire truth to us then for the energy to balance we need to heal these wounds. As awakened humans, we need to discover this for ourselves.”
“As we are taught, it is the experiences gained by being human that determine the growth of the spirit,” Jasmine added.
“So what do we do now? What is the first step toward healing?” Talis asked, trying to steer the group toward some plan of action.
Everyone was silent once again. They were beginning to understand the key components of the solution, but did not have the specific answers. This would take some time, time they perhaps didn’t have.
Joshua finally spoke again, still agitated over the situation. “Perhaps our stability this last 60 years is a somewhat false stability? Is it possible that some of our Elders lied to us? That the truth was hidden? That is why we still have fear, because we have not let go. We have not dealt with our past and still hold onto this energy. This will be our downfall if we do not deal with it.”
“And how do we let go of this fear?” Talis again asked the practical question.
No one spoke. They did not know the answer. They were close, very close, but something eluded them. They needed to come up with a plan.
Chapter 26
The Missing Pages
Talis was awakened late at night with an urgent message. Surprisingly, it was from Marvis, the bookbinder that Talis met when Grandfather’s third journal was repaired. He sent Talis an urgent virtual message on the net. He wanted to tell him something important.
“What is it?” Jasmine asked him as she awoke also from the message alert. They had been asleep in his guest house on the University grounds.
“He wants to see me. Tells me it’s urgent. Didn’t want to say anymore. I will message him back and see him first thing in the morning.”
“Do you want me to come?” Jasmine asked as she gently put her arms around him.
“I would like you to be there, please. I think it’s important we stay together as a team. This ordeal is getting stranger by the minute,” Talis said as he sat back down on the bed.
“I know. Very strange energy. I am sensing an imbalance.”
They both slept restlessly the rest of the night, waking up early to get to the train to take them to the village. Talis and Jasmine held each other’s hands tightly as they walked, wanting to stay close to each other. Something made them nervous and they were going to stay together.
They boarded at the University station and made their way to the bookbinder’s shop.
“Hello?” Talis called out as they entered the old store. The familiar smell of old paper books filled their senses. Jasmine looked around, amazed at the vast library of books that were kept here. Suddenly the old man appeared.
“It is good to see you so soon,” Marvis said as he ushered them to the back room. “I am glad you came. Please, let’s sit down.” Talis and Jasmine were silent as they followed him to the private back room and sat down.
“Tea?”
“Yes, please,” they said, both nodding in acknowledgement.
The old man looked in Talis’s eyes thoughtfully as he handed him the cup of tea. “I need you to listen to me closely and carefully. When I repaired the third journal, I immediately noticed its energy. That is why I warned you of it when we talked a few weeks ago.”
“I remember. You said it might hold some energy. We have talked recently about older things holding residual energy,” Talis noted.
“Very good. I am glad you remembered that. It is true. I was a scientist before I became a bookbinder. The first thing we must remember is that energy and vibrations are the essence of the universe. The second thing is that we and everything around us affects this vibration. We affect our reality by the energy that we put out.”
“What are you getting at?” Talis asked politely with a touch of impatience. “Is the journal affecting us on some level?
“I believe so. It is causing these feelings of fear to come up,” Marvis said. “And that’s not all.” He took a sip of his tea and went on. “The journal holds the secret of what happened during that time. The energy of the past is contained in it somehow, perhaps by the mystics. When I repaired it I sensed two things. One was that your grandfather had not brought it out to read for decades, and perhaps for a good reason. The book itself had been neither seen nor read since the revolution. The second thing—and this is the tricky part, the reason I called you here—I believe that a few pages are missing.”
Talis and Jasmine looked at each other in disbelief.
“What do you mean, missing? Where did they go and when did this happen?” Talis asked in a tense tone.
“The pages were carefully taken out by someone recently,” he told them bluntly.
They were all silent for several moments. Jasmine took several deep breaths and closed her eyes, trying to pick up on the energy of the situation. Perhaps she could feel something.
“I sense the pages were taken sometime between Grandfather’s death and when you received the journal here,” she said to the others.
“Correct,” said the old bookbinder. “I am not sure where. It is possible it was here or it could have been in your home. Regardless, there are several pages missing, about four or five, I believe.”
“Why did you not tell me of this before?” Talis stated rather angrily.
The old man looked at him with guilty eyes. “I’m sorry, my young friend. I was trying to protect the Elders, as they are my dear friends. I did not realize it would get this out of control.”
“Protect them from what?” Talis demanded. Jasmine gently grabbed his hand to try to help him calm down. He realized he needed to center himself.
Marvis tried to explain. “Talis, I need you to realize that the revolution was a confusing time. We all did things that we thought needed to be done.”
“Yes, I understand that, but what is it that you all are hiding from us?” Talis gently pleaded with him. The old man was silent for some time.
Jasmine tried her best to steer the conversation. “As you noted, we are part of the larger quantum field of spirit and energy. Our experiences here as individuals and as a collective are part of the larger universal energy field. What we
do here matters. We have tremendous power in the outcome of what happens to us. Please help us, Marvis.”
The old bookbinder looked her in the eyes. “You will need to do two things. You need to either find the missing pages or ask Lillian. She controls the energy of the journal now and will tell you what to do.”
“How does she control the energy?”
“The journal itself must have been tied to the lost mystics, in particular Lillian,” he told them. “I am not sure how. Perhaps because of her closeness with Talis’s grandfather. When it was opened again, the residual energy of the collective soul came to life. It could be directly from them or a collective pain from that time period. Whatever it is, I felt its energy and indeed it is tied to the current energy fluctuation in one way or another. Lillian could help you understand. That is why I warned you initially. I should have told you more at that time.”
Talis breathed deep as he tried to stay calm. “Is there not someone on this Earth that can also answer these questions?”
“Yes, some can,” the old bookbinder said, “but no one wants to admit the secret and many have forgotten. I cannot tell you, as I do not know exactly what went on, and it is not my place to share rumors. I am sorry. This secret may also destroy what he have worked so hard to build. I do not want to be responsible for that. I told you what I could; now it is you that must find the truth and reveal the past.”
Although it was normally not done without alerting the recipient, Jasmine tried hard to access Marvis’s inner thoughts with her psychic abilities, but he was blocking his memories or someone else was. She was desperate to help the situation, but did not feel comfortable delving any deeper.
Suddenly the old man spoke with slight hesitancy. “There is someone that may be able to help you. His name is Sudoki. You will find him at the boarding homes on the outskirts of our village.”
“And he has the answers for us?” Talis asked anxiously.
“Sudoki is very old now. He has been at the collective boarding house for decades. He was part of the revolution, and was there during the days in which the mystics disappeared. He knew your grandfather well.”
“We’ve got to go, then,” Talis said getting up quickly.
Talis and Jasmine knew it was a long shot, but it was a step in the right direction. They said their goodbyes to Marvis and left the store quickly as they needed to get back to the University and find the others.
Jasmine, Talis and the others from their young group would need to do something soon. And who could they trust of the Elders? Who was hiding the truth? They rushed to the train and jumped on board. They grabbed each other tight and did not say a word. Their deep stillness was all they needed.
Chapter 27
The Secret Meeting
Talis and Jasmine arranged a private meeting with Helena, Joshua and Layia to discuss what the old bookbinder had told them. They needed to trust at least one Elder, and Jasmine had upmost confidence in Helena’s integrity. The other young people and Joint Council members were not invited to keep the meeting quiet and to protect what was to be said. This was slightly out of the ordinary, but they felt it necessary with the recent events. Jasmine had already discussed some of the events with the others so they were partially informed.
They met at Helena’s private quarters just off the University gardens. She had a private suite with a beautiful inner garden that she spent hours tending to in her quiet time. The fragrant lavender and roses which she grew calmed the group as they sat down on the cool grass.
After a brief centering meditation, Helena began the discussion. “I am sorry that you have had to deal with these things of the past. I feel that some of my fellow Elders have not been upfront with us. I am saddened, yet know that there are indeed challenges in all parts of life.”
Joshua was angry at the discovery. Everything was building up inside of him and he was having difficulty containing his emotions.
“So basically there is 60 years of hidden guilt inside of the journal?” he said rather sarcastically.
“Yes, I guess we could see it that way,” Talis said rather agreeably.
“Now remember, my young friends,” Helena noted in her gentle way. “This is tied to our collective pain. It may have been only a small group of people that hid the secrets of the past, but it is a collective soul loss that we are dealing with. This is possibly what is disrupting the energy field, or is at least tied to it.”
“So this collective guilt is causing the disruption?” Talis asked, trying to get clarification.
Helena continued with her explanation. “One of the core shamanic beliefs is the idea of ‘soul loss’ and the associated shamanic practice of ‘soul retrieval.’ This is the idea that part of our soul can literally depart, leaving behind a sense of emptiness and a feeling that something is missing. This causes a loss of energy, depression, anger and illness. The treatment is for a shamanic practitioner to find the missing part and persuade it to come back to help make the person whole again. This can also be done on a larger societal level so that any lost parts of the collective soul would be retrieved.”
“I agree,” Jasmine noted. “This is our focus. Even though we are One on so many levels, it is our individual actions that make up the whole. Our individual actions affect the larger energy force. If we can find these individual actions that were done to us, and these secrets that were hidden for 60 years, we can alter the energy field, fill a void and retrieve the lost parts of our collective soul. This might increase our energy and be a key.”
Helena added, “Although we indeed are One on many levels, we still experience the separation. We still experience life as a separate being and we do many things that affect the whole—some from love, some from fear. We have the potential to let go of this and return to the Source, but it is a lifetime process. We must come to peace with this process; this will be a key in our healing and evolution. Our true liberation is accepting this journey and experiencing all levels of it. That means finding the source of the secrets and healing our soul.”
“Forgive me for interrupting your deep wisdom,” Joshua said with respect and a bit of irritation, “but aren’t we forgetting something? We talk of the shadow and healing the collective soul, but what do we do with our current situation? My emotions might be all over the place, but I’m quite angry that I have been lied to for all my lifetime. Why were the secrets kept from us? And what is the next step to solving this mystery?” Joshua paused looked around at the group with tears in his eyes and continued. “I had so much confidence in this world a few weeks ago. Now I am not so sure.”
Everyone appreciated Joshua’s honesty and took time to reflect on this question. These would be the same questions many people would ask. They would have to deal with these issues if the energy was going to stay at a high vibration.
After a quiet moment, Layia spoke. “Joshua and I have both continued to connect with Lillian and the spirit world through our visions and dreams. We are not sure what our purpose is at this time. This is possibly why Joshua feels angry and emotional. It has affected us both, but I also feel Joshua may have a deeper role in this transition. His feelings are valid and they are leading us toward the truth.”
Joshua looked at her with a smile. Something deeper bothered him. “Ever since my connection with the spirit world through the portal and with my reoccurring dreams, I have felt intense emotions. Most of these emotions deal with anger, sadness and even rage. I have never felt them so intensely. And although I connect very deeply with the earth, I sometimes feel I am being called back to spirit.”
“Called back to spirit?” Talis asked bluntly.
“I need to connect with Lillian directly,” Joshua said as he stood up. “I need to access the portal and find out what’s going on.”
“Do you feel Lillian will have some answers for us?” Jasmine asked.
“Yes, something is not quite right. We need to return.”
“I have great empathy with you Joshua,” Helena uttered w
ith a strong voice. “But we need to at least get permission from the larger Council to use the portal. That is our way.”
“I hate to burst your bubble,” Joshua said angrily, “but we cannot trust the Council anymore. Someone tried to sabotage the portal, remember? And the journal pages are missing. We don’t know who we can trust anymore. We need to do this alone.”
“Joshua, please.” Jasmine got up and went to him as she tried to calm him. “Helena means no disrespect. I understand your pain. We need to think through this clearly.”
Joshua was apologetic, but not convinced. “I am sorry, Helena—and all here—for my anger. Yet I think our only way to heal this situation is to confront those that know the answers. Jasmine, you yourself informed us that the old bookbinder told you that we should ask Lillian about the lost secrets, that she would know. I think the only way to find out is to use the portal. Our trance dreams do not allow us to stay long enough or to control our interaction.”
Everyone knew he was right.
“And what of this Sudoki fellow?” Jasmine asked the group. “Can he also tell us some of these answers?”
“We will need to find out soon,” Talis muttered, not sure which path was the best one.
Helena got up and slowly walked over toward her lavender. She smelled its deep fragrance, breathing it in. “I cannot hold you back, my wise young friends, but I am not able to assist you directly. I will, however, give you three days during which my recollection of your actions will be vague. You must find the answers soon. I wish you the best. Namaste.” And with that she bowed deeply to the four young people and disappeared into her quarters.
Helena was giving them an opportunity and they knew it. They all looked at each other in silence.
“What do we do now?” Layia asked, not knowing exactly what the next step was.
The Mystic Paradigm: An Evolutionary Novel Page 16