The battle was long and intense. Helena sensed her sisters under the strain of their telepathic marathon during the Invasion of Proxus. The remaining Proxan battleships stood their ground against the superior Human fleet. However, like all battles, the defender had the advantage. Ground and orbital batteries pelted the Human warships as they advanced. Mines and other hazards hindered their approach.
The Jupiter rolled on its axis to absorb the brunt of the battery fire from the nearest Proxan battleship. Though battered, the Jupiter held together to deliver a killing strike to the enemy vessel.
“The Minotaur is going down,” Admiral Stugardt said.
Helena acknowledged sorrow over the likely death of Claudia. However, she didn’t dare inspect her wall. The time for grief would need to come later. She felt her internal wall shake as a large fireball formed near Proxus, fell to the surface and disintegrated.
“May your journey be swift,” Helena whispered, hating herself for what she had to become to fulfill her duty.
Hate. There was no place for it so Helena tossed that over the wall as well. Her mother would have lamented over the loss of her eldest daughter’s heart, but Helena knew no other way to complete her mission. Everything must be contained. Controlled. She was like the winter – dark and cold.
“The Proxan battleship on the far side of the planet just jumped,” Stugardt said. “The Mars is in pursuit.”
“Fair speed, Terentia,” Helena said, her voice barely audible.
Compassion for her sister? That mustn’t be allowed through the wall either. Helena forced those feelings behind the wall. Nothing must interfere with her duty.
The wall strained against its new inhabitants but it held.
“We need to take out those orbitals,” Nathan said. “Have the frigates concentrate their fire there.”
Orders were given and orders were followed. Helena existed as a tool of strategy, nothing more. She guided the Jupiter through the Proxan defenses and they commenced their bombardment of the Proxan surface. How many millions died? Helena didn’t want to calculate the number. She was cold and devoid of remorse. That was the only way. She knew Nathan sensed further change in her, but she walled that out too.
“We’re receiving word of surrender,” Stugardt said.
Helena examined the tactical display and noted two remaining Proxan battleships. “No,” she said. “They are planning a trap. Every Proxan ship must be destroyed.”
With ruthless precision, Helena watched as the Kraken and Waterloo moved in for the kill. She sensed Valeria and Marcella as they tore the defenseless Proxan ships to pieces. No mercy. This was what had to be done to ensure the safety of her civilization. Helena’s face remained a cool mask of nothingness. There was no emotion below or above the surface.
Hours passed. Bombs dropped. Proxans died.
As the sun peeked around the side of the planet, the war came to its conclusion.
Chapter 38
Twenty hours after the fall of Proxus, Helena visited Nathan’s quarters. Though he was hesitant, he allowed her to share his bed. Doubts plagued him but he was unable to resist her when she was that close to him.
When exhaustion finally overtook him, Helena sent the signal to her sisters – now was their time. From the captain’s console, she executed her code into the Jupiter’s computer system and the ship’s engines churned in preparation for the course Helena had set.
When she rejoined him in his bed, he moved to kiss her and said, “I’ve missed you.”
Helena pulled her head away and looked into his eyes. She realized he wasn’t just referring to her short trip to his desk. He missed Caledonia. He longed for the exciting days of discovery between them.
“I do wish things were different,” she said.
Large sections of the wall around her heart crumbled as she looked into his heart. What had she done? Why did she resort to such desperate measures to complete her goal? Was she really not strong enough to both love the Human and also her people?
Nathan stiffened when he felt the needle against his skin. “What?”
“Do not move or I will be forced to inject you before I have the chance to set myself right in your heart,” Helena said. “I do love you, a part of me always will. You taught me that I can be so much more than daughter and heir. I can be a woman… a partner. For that, I cherish you.” She paused as the pain mounted in her stomach. “Please understand that my duty is to my people.”
“What do you want?” Nathan said. “The war is over.”
“We cannot allow Human or Proxan warmongering to ever again threaten our planet, nor can we forgive the atrocities of the past,” Helena said.
“I don’t understand,” Nathan said. “We are allies. You don’t need to fear us any longer.”
“We fear the potential of your weapons and your imperialism,” Helena said. “Though you promise me things today, a thousand years from now my people may not receive the same assurances. Don’t you see? This is the only way.”
More sections of her wall crumbled and she scrambled to repair it as her own doubts mounted. How could she do this to the man she loved? To the people she befriended? No. Those thoughts weren’t welcome. They must return to behind the wall.
This was the only way.
“What about us?” Nathan said, his voice uneven. “Was that a lie so you could execute your betrayal?”
Helena shook her head. “I loved you with a part of my heart I did not know existed,” she said. “But, it is my reason I must follow now. That is the part that tells me we are enemies.”
Helena readied the needle and said, “I would have very much liked to see your home, Nathan.”
The intercom crackled to life and Lieutenant Sandra Rhom’s voice carried over the speakers.
“Captain, we are receiving a distress call from the Mars,” Rhom said. “And something’s wrong with the computer. We need you up here.”
Nathan turned to Helena and said, “Isn’t your youngest sister, Terentia, on the Mars?”
Helena paused. Terentia? No! The war was over, she shouldn’t be in danger! Chasing down that last Proxan battleship must have gone awry. Helena performed the math and decided that she couldn’t risk saving her sister, though large sections of the wall exploded when she realized the danger Terentia faced.
Memories of raising Terentia from an infant flooded from the destroyed sections of the wall around her heart. She fed Terentia her bottles and rocked her at night when she was upset. Terentia’s favorite bedtime story rang in Helena’s ears. Oh, how many nights she had read it to her! Helena taught her the mental disciplines and was proud of her ability.
Though she lied the promise to her father, Helena couldn’t deal with the death of another sister – not Terentia. She said she would keep Terentia safe and that’s what she had to do. Without the wall to contain her emotions surrounding Terentia, Helena made her decision.
“Captain, we both have people we care about aboard the Mars,” Helena said.
“We do.”
“I’ve seen you go to great lengths to keep your word in the past, would now be no different?” Helena said.
Nathan nodded. “My word is my name. I would never break it… not even to my enemy.”
“We are close enough to assist, yes?”
“Yes.”
“We will assist the Mars,” Helena said. “And then you will turn the Jupiter over to me.”
“And what of my crew?”
More bricks cracked along her wall. She mustn’t falter. “I…. I-”
She realized at that moment the imperfections in her plan. Her ancestors warned her that the only way to a true emotionless state was to destroy the capacity to feel. Helena thought she was clever. She built a wall instead. A wall to contain her heart. Now, that wall was failing her. The heart proved stronger and she realized she didn’t have much time before the rest of the wall crumbled.
What would happened then?
“Here’s my counterproposal,�
� Nathan said. “We assist and then everyone aboard this ship will evacuate to the Mars. Is that acceptable?”
“You would give your word on this?” Helena asked, sensing no deception in his heart. Instead, she found love there. Love, after her betrayal. She finally appreciated the power of these new emotions.
“My Lady, you have it. Always.”
Chapter 39
The Jupiter jumped to the spot where the Mars had sent their distress signal. The Proxan battleship was attempting boarding maneuvers when they arrived. After a brutal salvo of torpedoes, the Proxan battleship was destroyed. If Helena’s sisters were successful, these were the last two battleships in the universe. However, Helena couldn’t destroy them both, as she had bargained one for her sister’s life.
Nathan evacuated the entire crew of the Jupiter to the drifting Mars. Though there were many puzzled looks, the crew obeyed the order.
Admiral Stugardt was the last to leave the bridge. He stopped next to Helena and said, “I don’t understand… why would you do this?”
“To never again see a war or weapons of this magnitude in our skies,” Helena said. “And to punish for Human crimes of the past. You awoke the sleeping tigress, Admiral. Do not cry now that she cut you deep.”
“I thought we were friends,” Stugardt said. “I looked upon you as I would my own daughter. Nadine loves you. I just don’t understand.”
“Tell me, Admiral, what lengths would you cross to protect your wonderful family?”
Stugardt shook his head and said, “Not this… not this.”
“I’m sorry to have disappointed you,” Helena said. “But my duty is to my people.”
Admiral Stugardt passed Nathan on his way from the bridge. They exchanged words and the admiral departed.
“They have arrested Terentia,” Nathan said. “I thought you would want to know.”
Helena nodded as she re-executed her computer attack upon the Jupiter. “Shouldn’t you be getting to your shuttle?” she asked.
He looked into her eyes. His face was full of pain. Helena couldn’t return his gaze for fear of utterly destroying her wall.
“A captain goes down with his ship,” he said. “My place is here, on the bridge.”
Helena turned to him. “I am destroying this ship. Though it is my duty to destroy you as well, my bargain with you will stay my hand. Please, leave now.”
Nathan shook his head. “Just like I kept my word to you, I will keep my oath to the Human navy. I will stay with my ship until the very end.”
“That is suicide, then,” Helena said. “Your death is not on my hands.”
“Do you really believe that?”
Helena didn’t answer. She gained control of the Jupiter’s navigation system and she jumped towards the tellium star. Using the wormhole, the trip didn’t take long. Her last act was to disable the computer and propulsion systems. The Jupiter would drift into the star.
She looked at Nathan before departing the bridge. “I do wish things were different between us,” she said.
His eyes watered and he said, “I love you, Helena.”
She nodded and detached the orange globes from her hair. Handing the piece of jewelry to him she said, “I will keep the memory of Caledonia in my heart. I have reserved a special place for it and for you, Nathan. You taught me how to be a woman, but now I must be the Empress.”
“Then keep it,” he said. “So you won’t forget me-”
“No, I cannot.”
Before the fortress around her heart crumbled, Helena dropped the globes in his hand and rushed to the lift. She paused midway and spoke, but she found she couldn’t look him in the eyes.
“I know this may not reconcile what I have done,” she said, “but the walls we sometimes build around our hearts are both terrible and necessary to fulfill our duty. I regret my betrayal to you… and only to you.”
Before risking more words, she entered the lift. Her heart felt like lead in her chest. What was she doing? This was all wrong!
She reached for the halt button as her emotions rallied against the remaining sections of wall around her heart. She could incapacitate Nathan and spare his life. She reached with her mind to find him. He was frantically trying to disable her ironclad code. His mind was embattled too as his heart yearned to follow her and abandon his post. Yet he remained as resolute to his duty as Helena had to hers. Her finger hovered near the button, but she didn’t press it. Moments later, she arrived in the hangar bay where the captain’s yacht waited to take her home to Antares.
She risked one last glance at the lift that could bring her back to the bridge and to the place in her heart where she found joy. Helena again considered forcing Nathan to come with her. Perhaps he could forgive her in time. She reached for the button.
“No,” she said aloud.
Could she risk him never forgiving her? How would that place in her heart heal if he didn’t love her anymore? His duty was to attempt to save his ship after she was gone. As fruitless as that would be, it was his duty. He kept his word because he was a man of honor. Helena decided that was how she would remember him. She hurried up the ramp to the yacht and powered the engines.
The yacht sped from the doomed ship and Helena severed her connection to Nathan’s mind. She couldn’t bear to be linked to him as he died. She turned her vessel away from the Jupiter and sped towards home.
“Good bye, my love,” she said. “You will live forever in my heart.”
Chapter 40
“I am sorry,” Emperor Agreios said, “I have failed my daughters and I have failed Antares.”
Helena watched from her father’s balcony as the Human ships descended to the surface. The emperor quickly surrendered when the Humans threatened to bomb the planet.
“This is not how I wished this to end,” Agreios said. “With my planet occupied and my daughters shattered.”
“Emperor,” Valeria said. “I heard a rumor that Justina was killed by her crew. She couldn’t bring herself to execute the plan. That leaves two battleships with the Humans. We failed.”
“And Terentia is captured,” Helena said as she strapped her sword to her waist.
“Helena, Valeria and Marcella,” Agreios said. “Is this all that is left of my family? Is there no one else?”
Helena stepped to her father and put her hand on his arm. “Father,” she said, “you know Claudia and Prisca were killed in action. We are the only ones to make it safely home. Though I guess Antares will not be our home for long. We destroyed both tellium stars, but we grossly miscalculated one variable – emotion.”
“Emotion?” Agreios said. “We knew Humans were governed by their hearts-”
“Not them… us!” Helena said, “We are not devoid of that spark of life which flares brighter than all else. We thought we were, but our math was wrong.”
“The plan was sound-” Agreios mumbled.
“They will scatter us,” Marcella said. “To ensure we are never a threat again.”
He nodded. “Yes, I can sense that is their intention. Also, my life is forfeit.”
Helena embraced her father, though her love was but a distant and intangible memory. She hadn’t even begun to recover from building the wall around her heart to fulfill her mission. The reality of her mother’s warning echoed in her mind – you may never recover.
“I’m sorry Father, but that is the Human penalty for what we have done,” Helena said. “Do we deserve less than this?”
Agreios flinched when he touched the sword. He looked to each of his three remaining daughters. Marcella holstered pistols underneath her jacket and Valeria inspected the edge on her own sword.
“Where… what are you doing?” he asked.
Helena cupped her father’s face in her hand and said, “We know Terentia is alive, maybe Justina too. We intend to rescue them.”
“And kill as many Humans along the way as possible,” Valeria said as she rammed her blade into its scabbard.
“Terentia-” Agrei
os said. “I would very much like to see her again. She reminds me of your mother.”
Helena removed her hand from her father and stared into his eyes. He was not the same man who started this series of events, but he was responsible for the most dramatic destruction of two superpowers the universe had ever seen. He would be remembered as a zealot, a terrorist. Helena wasn’t sure that was far from the truth. His actions had changed them all and brought about the fall of Antares.
“Unfortunately, Father,” Helena said, “You will never see Terentia again. They will bring you back to Terra and they will want to kill you. However, the fate of all Antarans will not be the same, as you hoped. I will rescue Terentia and I will carry the crown of Antares for as long as I am able. We will gather whatever refugees we can and we will find a home. I promise you the Antarans will live as we always have – free from the imperialists of this universe. If they dare interfere again, I will remind them of what happened the last time we were provoked. And they will remember.”
“My Empress,” Valeria and Marcella said in unison.
“I am sorry, Father, but you have indeed failed your people,” Helena said. “For that, I remove you of your title. You are hereby excused from your duties.”
Agreios’s eyes widened as he realized what his daughter was doing.
“The Humans will know that I am the ruler of Antares,” Helena said. “So it is me who must answer for these crimes and not you. The Human press will also know of this, so if they try to execute you, they will be breaking their own interstellar laws. And they are not strong enough to do that anymore. The other civilizations of our universe will hold them accountable.”
“But they will hunt you down,” Agreios said. “You will not be safe. What if they capture you?”
“Then my fate will be more dreadful than that of my people,” Helena said. “And that is how it should be.”
For Duty (Antaran Legacy Book 1) Page 25