“I’m sorry to make it so hard for you,” she said, picking up her fork and digging into her ravioli with gusto.
“I find myself wanting you more than anyone else in a long time,” he said, looking at her with desire that he didn’t even try to hide.
She returned his steamy gaze with her own. Duncan considered abandoning his plan and pushing everything to the floor to have her right there on the table, like a bad movie. Instead, he forced himself to look down at his food and tried to concentrate on it.
“I’m not sure what I want,” she admitted, and he looked up. Her eyes were suddenly sad, almost distant. “My father says I have a place here at the university in the fall. If I’m going to be a doctor, I’ll need to focus on that.”
“I understand,” he said, nodding. He didn’t really like it, but he understood. She wanted him, that much was clear, but not in quite the same all-encompassing way that he’d realized he wanted her.
“Well, whatever you want to do is fine with me,” he said, flashing one of his most charming smiles to lighten the mood. He turned on his charity chatter and spent the rest of the meal talking of much less serious subjects.
He didn’t know what else to try, and he wasn’t about to ask Helena for any more help. He’d made it very clear what he wanted. He’d just have to wait and see what she wanted.
Chapter 15
Alix was getting ready for bed, thinking over her dinner with Duncan, and how surprising it had been. Not just the fact that he’d been there when she’d returned from the hospital, but everything. How open he’d been with her, how easy it was to talk to him about her interests. He really did know a lot about the different charities, and seemed genuinely engaged with a few of the causes.
What had surprised her the most, however, was his willingness to help her clean up afterwards. He helped stack the plates and fold the tablecloth before she called a butler to take everything back to the kitchen. She would have done it herself, if it hadn’t been for her crutches. Duncan actually volunteered to do it, and after wishing her a good night, accompanied the butler, carrying several dishes. All of her teasing had apparently had an effect. He was trying.
But it was pointless for him to try, she thought sadly, as she brushed her teeth a bit more vigorously than usual. He had looked so disappointed when she’d mentioned she wanted to focus on school, which was as close to the truth as she wanted to get with him. She didn’t want to hurt him, even though a big part of her also wanted to have fun. Lots of fun.
Despite all of the evidence, she wasn’t sure that she really believed he wanted more. People couldn’t change that quickly, could they?
She slowly lowered herself onto her bed, being careful not to put too much pressure on her left leg. She had texted Stella to see if she could come by to help her, both with getting ready for bed and to dissect the dinner, but no reply. Anton’s apartment was on the other side of the city, anyway, and by the time she got there, Alix would already have been asleep. She wondered how her friend was feeling about having held on to Anton’s attention for several weeks now. It was almost a game to Stella, and she was currently winning.
Alix thought it was the same with Duncan’s attention towards her. She knew she challenged him, and that it must be driving him mad to have to try so hard to win her over. Once he got what he wanted, though, once he won, she knew that he wouldn’t stick around. Which was actually perfect for her.
It seemed like the ideal situation, now that she was really thinking about it. They both wanted each other physically—that much was obvious. Just thinking about his touch sent a shiver of electricity down her spine and deep into her belly. Why shouldn’t she have fun, if that was, at least in part, what he wanted? And if he was sad when she left, well, there was always Christiana, or a dozen other nobles to help him forget about her. She was just the first one who had ever made it hard for him. He was learning how to romance a girl properly, and his next conquest would thank her for it.
As for her own feelings, she might be worried if she were staying. Having an expiration date would help her keep things in check. He was certainly sweeter and more serious than she’d expected, but this simply wasn’t the right time for all of that. She’d give in to her physical desires without letting emotions get in the way. She needed the practice—doctors had to be rational and objective. And objectively, she was aching to feel his touch. His dinner had at least accomplished that much. He had left a chaste kiss on her cheek when he left with the butler, and had pulled away slowly, letting his face linger close to hers. She could still feel his hot breath on her cheek.
She smiled to herself as she snuggled into bed. She’d have to go thank Duncan for the dinner in person—the sooner, the better.
Chapter 16
As Alix slept peacefully next to him, curled in a tight ball beneath his white cotton sheets, Duncan thought about everything that had happened since she’d appeared unannounced at his door the previous night. She’d barely said hello before letting her crutches fall to the floor and throwing herself at him, her hands grasping at his shirt, his hair, everywhere she could touch. The feel of her body under her slip dress was intoxicating, and they barely made it to his bedroom before she began to tug off his jeans. She gasped appreciatively at how eager he was to get started.
Still, he took his time, pulling out of their fierce embrace to slowly undress her, careful of the bandages that still encased her leg. He laid her on his bed, teasing with his mouth, drawing out the pleasure until she was almost whimpering with anticipation.
“Please,” came her whispered plea, her hands tangled in his hair.
Finally being with her was more intense than he had expected, and it was all he could do to restrain himself and make it last as long as possible. He wanted this to be for her. She had come to him, wanting this. He did not want to disappoint.
He moved slowly, carefully, listening for signs that she wanted more of something. But her panting breath and low moans of pleasure brought him to a quick release, more powerful than he’d anticipated. He lay in her arms after, spent and immensely satisfied, listening to her beating heart. He felt her body rumble with laughter beneath him.
He looked at her questioningly, trying to hide his wounded pride.
“Is something funny, Lady Alix?”
“If I’d have known it would be this good, I would have gone home with you that night at the club,” she said with a chuckle at his worried face.
He smiled wide, ecstatic that she wasn’t disappointed with the unexpected rapidity of their first time. He made sure, however, that during the second (and third) time, later that night, she came first.
As he looked down at her sleeping figure, he brushed away a stray lock of her dark hair that had fallen across her face. She looked so angelic, the heat and passion of the night before erased by a peaceful and exhausted sleep. He knew she was passionate about so many things, and was pleased to see himself now included in that list. He wondered, however, if that was all it was for her—a physical passion. Was he really okay with that? With anyone else, the answer would have been yes. With Alix…
As she stirred, he felt himself awaken as well, and pushed all of his thoughts about what he might be feeling away. She opened her eyes and smiled when she felt him eager for another round. He was more than willing to comply, all thoughts of emotions thrown out the window for the time being. For now, he was happy to lose himself in her body as many times as she wanted.
Chapter 17
Alix was addicted. There was no other word. She’d been to see Duncan every night since that first one together, and she couldn’t seem to get enough. She’d wanted fun, and this was beyond fun. This was getting her fill for the next few years, and then some. She had been surprised at just how tender, how attentive he had been that first night—going slow, looking for her cues. The attentiveness had continued, and she kept coming back for more.
Alix hadn’t expected him to be so vulnerable, so sweet, underneath the cool, careless
exterior. He may not have known how to react in a moment of crisis, but he was smart, and funny, and caring. She caught herself whenever she started having those thoughts, however, knowing that no matter how sweet he was, it didn’t change the fact that she was leaving soon.
The text messages he sent her, on the other hand, were not quite so sweet. He always managed to send them right at the worst moments, setting her heart beating in her chest and her legs buckling in the middle of a luncheon or while speaking with one of the elderly countesses. She’d usually respond with a list of things that she’d do to him later that night, and she always followed through, no matter how tired her long days made her.
The Prynessian royal court was hosting many events happening that summer, and they both had full schedules. Alix found herself enduring endless hours of small talk, applauding politely, and smiling for cameras. She would have found them slightly more tolerable if Duncan’s own responsibilities had allowed him to attend more than one or two with her. Until he had his own charity to attend to, he went wherever his parents needed him most, much like Alix.
When they found each other every night, they would fall into each other’s arms as if they had been separated weeks, not hours. They would talk late into the night, once their bodies had exhausted themselves in pleasure.
As the days passed, Alix was getting anxious. She had to tell him about the program. While neither mentioned anything farther in the future than the next day, she wanted to let him know that this had an expiration date. It only seemed fair. The logical, future physician’s part of her brain knew they couldn’t spend an entire summer like this – seeing each other every day, talking late into the night – without one of them getting hurt. When she saw the way she caught him looking at her sometimes with such bright, happy eyes, she knew it would be him if she didn’t make her exit plan clear. That way, Alix reassured herself, he could have the next countess waiting in the wings, ready to emerge the second that she got on the plane.
When she knocked on his door that night, he opened it immediately, as if he had been waiting behind the door for her. He swept her inside, closed the door and promptly pressed her against it, his lips and hands somehow everywhere at once. She nearly forgot what she’d wanted to tell him.
“Duncan,” she managed to get out between kisses. “I need to tell you something.”
His eyes were suddenly full of panic as they glanced down to her stomach.
“No! It’s not that!” she cried, surprised that his mind had jumped so quickly to a pregnancy. She wondered briefly how many other girls had said those same words to him in an attempt to secure his love. She brushed the thought of them aside.
He exhaled in relief, stepping back.
“You couldn’t have chosen different words?” he said jokingly, hand to his chest as if to steady his racing heart.
Alix inhaled sharply. She knew he didn’t mean it as a slight. With the near constant socializing this summer, she’d gotten more comfortable speaking Prynessian, but had always stuck to French with Duncan. Certain phrases held slightly different meanings, apparently.
“I told you that this was just something fun, for the summer, right?” she said. She wasn’t sure that he’d really paid any attention to what she’d been saying those first few nights.
He nodded, and pulled her down onto the couch in his living room, facing her. He drew little circles on her leg with his fingers, distracting and exciting her simultaneously.
“Well, it’s not because I’ll have school and need to concentrate, like I’d told you before,” she began. “It’s because I’ve been offered a spot in the Refugee Medical Alliance internship program.”
He blinked, surprised. A beat passed and Alix felt her heart tighten. It shouldn’t matter what he thinks, she told herself, as she waited for his response. This was just a formality, like giving two weeks’ notice before leaving a job. A really fun, sexy job...
“Wow, congratulations!” he said, finally, breaking her out of her jumbled thoughts. “They do amazing work.”
He went on to talk about a few of their events that he had attended the previous winter.
She smiled to herself. She shouldn’t have been surprised that he knew all about it. One of their main European recruiting offices was in Prynesse.
She could see a flicker of something in his eyes—disappointment? Relief? It was hard to tell.
“When do you leave?” he asked, in an offhand way, as if he was inquiring about the weather. It must have been relief then.
“I’m still waiting on my final assignment,” she explained. “Once I get it, I’ll need to fly out within a few days to start training.”
“So, any day now?”
“Well, by the end of summer, for sure,” she said, surprised at the reassuring tone in her voice. “But probably not for another few weeks. We still have time for some fun.”
She gave him a suggestive smile, that he returned, but his eyes betrayed a touch of sadness. Her breath caught in her throat. She had been worried about this. He’d revealed so much to her in their conversations, he was definitely becoming attached. But she had confidence that he’d be able to get over it.
“Don’t worry,” she teased, trying to keep the mood light, and brighten his downturned face. “You’ll have your pick of girls to help you forget about me once I’m gone.”
“Why don’t you help remind me of what I’ll be missing then, hmmm?” he said, brushing aside her hair to kiss her on the sensitive spot under her ear. He slowly made his way down her neck, sending shivers up and down her spine.
Without another word, she reached down and unbuttoned his jeans. She didn’t want to make it too easy for another countess to make him forget about her, after all.
Chapter 18
Duncan had been brooding for days about what Alix had told him. They still saw each other every night, and she hadn’t mentioned it again. He knew that if he were the one to bring it up, she’d realize how much he was hurting.
He had gladly accepted Leo’s invitation for a drink to help get his mind off of the whole situation.
Duncan was surprised that his brother had suggested drinks at his apartment in town instead of going out. Duncan realized that it had been weeks, actually, since they had all gone out to a club. Not that he missed the clubs, exactly, but Helena’s party had been the last time he’d seen all of his siblings together. They were all so much busier all of a sudden. They used to hang out nearly every other night.
Leo’s apartment was in the historic part of the city, down a tiny, private road and behind a gated courtyard. Helena sought privacy by being high above everyone else; Leo looked for it in more old-fashioned, unobtrusive ways.
Duncan could tell the second he walked in that something was bothering his brother. He was pacing, his back to the door, repeating something under his breath and gesturing with his hands as if he was rehearsing.
“Hey, Leo, what’s the matter?” Duncan asked, worried.
“It’s Annabelle,” Leo said, sighing, sitting down on the couch dejectedly.
“Who, the hot redhead that’s been following you around?” Duncan joked. He’d seen her at a few events both Leo and Duncan had attended together. She hadn’t said a word to anyone, but looked at Leo with that longing in her eyes he’d seen countless times before.
“Shut up, I love her,” Leo said defensively.
Yikes, he’s sure in a mood tonight, Duncan thought to himself, holding up his hands.
“Hey, sorry, I didn’t realize.” He made his way over to the bar. Though he’d wanted to avoid the topic of girls this evening, if that was what his brother wanted to talk about, then so be it. But he’d need a bit of help, if Leo was going to be cranky about it. He poured himself some whiskey and leaned against the bar to face his brother.
“So what’s the problem? You love her, and she doesn’t love you?” Duncan could certainly relate to that.
“Her parents are teachers, her grandparents were farmers,” Leo put his h
ead in his hands. “They’re all commoners. Not even a second cousin who might be a viscount or something.”
“Well that’s unfortunate,” was all Duncan could manage to think to say.
It was one thing for Leo to promise to change the law so Helena could marry her girlfriend (who, despite her efforts to be mysterious, they had all figured out was the Countess of Eiligene). The requirement for royals to marry nobility, however, was pretty much set in stone. The more socially egalitarian tendencies of the other European monarchies had not made their way into the Prynesse court quite yet. The siblings would all have to marry someone noble, and of Prynesse birth, to be eligible to rule.
Leo was running his hands through his hair, sighing in what Duncan considered a slightly melodramatic fashion.
“So you need help figuring out how to break up with her?” Duncan usually managed to break things off amicably, unlike Anton who left a host of broken hearts and promises of revenge behind him.
Leo shook his head. He took a deep breath.
“That’s the last thing I want to do,” he said, sitting back on the couch. Duncan set his glass down on the bar and crossed his arms.
“So what are you going to do?”
“I’m stepping down,” Leo said simply. He looked up at Duncan with a calm, peaceful expression, as if he hadn’t just released a bomb that would totally change both of their lives.
“I’m sorry, what?” Duncan replied, sitting down on a nearby barstool. His legs no longer seemed to want to support him. “I don’t think you know what you just said.”
“I know exactly what I said,” replied his older brother, sighing. “I can’t live my life without her. I don’t want to be king.”
“Leo, you can still be king without a queen,” argued Duncan. “And of course you want to be king, you’ve been practicing your coronation walk since you were ten.”
A Royal Distraction Page 6