Then I pressed the ‘call’ button and held it to my ear.
“Hello?”
That sweet, innocent, luxurious voice.
“Hey, Piper.”
The beat of silence was deafening before I heard her sigh.
“Hi, Rock.”
“Don’t sound too happy at my expense,” I said.
“How did you get my number?”
“Do you remember that little about me?”
“What is it?”
“You sound like you just woke up.”
“That’s because I did. I decided to get a nap in while Gavin’s sleeping,” she said.
“Didn’t mean to wake you.”
“Yes, you did.”
“I meant to get in touch with you. Not wake you up. I didn’t know you were sleeping. Had I known, I would’ve let you sleep.”
“Thanks,” she said. “Now what is it?”
“I want to talk with you. Just the two of us. One on one. Is that something we can arrange?”
“I’m not sure,” she said. “What do you want to talk about?”
“Everything,” I said. “About Gavin. About how you’ve been. About how we can possibly work this out. I meant what I said when I left this afternoon. I want to prove to you that I deserve to be in Gavin’s life.”
“In my life?” she asked.
It was a question I hadn’t expected her to ask with such fervor in her voice.
“Do you want to be in my life?”
The silence kept me on the edge of my chair as I leaned forward and rested my forearm on top of my desk.
“I don’t know,” Piper said. “I’m not really sure of anything at the moment.”
“Which is why we should get together and talk.”
“That statement had a very different connotation a few years ago.”
“It doesn't have that connotation now,” I said. “I really do want to talk. Converse. Like two adults who have a child together.”
“Rock, this happened very fast--”
“You’re telling me,” I said.
“I need some time to think.”
“Then you can think out loud to me. If I promise not to try and change your mind about anything right now, will you meet with me?”
“Is that a promise you can make?” she asked.
“It is now, yes.”
“Rock?”
“Yes, Piper?”
“Did you ever love me?”
The mere fact that she could ask me such a fucking question punched me so hard in my gut I saw stars.
“It’s the one thing I ask myself. I look at Gavin some nights while he’s sleeping and I wonder if he was conceived out of love.”
“I think that’s a question I should answer while looking in your eyes, Piper.”
I heard her sniffle and it made me bristle. She was crying. And no one was there with her. That was bullshit. No woman should cry alone, especially one who had dealt with the shitty fucking hand that life had handed Piper.
“Okay,” she said. “Let’s get together and talk.”
Chapter 14
Piper
I sat at the kitchen table, my leg jiggling underneath it. I’d just dropped Gavin off at kindergarten and my shift for the day didn’t start until this afternoon. Part of me wanted to crack open a damn beer for the conversation I was about to have with Rock, but the other part of me needed caffeine to wake myself up. So, I sat there with my robe tied off at my waist, sipped on my mug of coffee, and waited for him to show up.
I felt nervous. Vulnerable. Cornered for the first time in a long time. I kept replaying our phone conversation yesterday and I cursed myself. What the hell prompted me to ask him that question? Did he ever love me? Of course, he fucking didn’t. It was Rock. He had good times, not good feelings. Why the hell I could’ve ever convinced myself Gavin was conceived out of some notion of love was beyond me.
But part of me wanted him to have been.
I drained my mug of coffee and got up to put it in the sink. Two cups of coffee was all I could handle for this conversation. Any more caffeine and I’d jiggle my way right out the door and into the damn ditch that started all this in the first place. The fact that Rock was so adamant about being in his son’s life had me confused. It was nothing like the Rock I remembered. Nothing like the non-committal, weekend tripping, random fucking in the alleyway on his bike man I knew him to be.
Then again, I wasn’t the same kind of woman he remembered, either.
A knock came at my door and I froze. He was here. Rock was back at my house. I pulled my phone out of my robe pocket to see if I had missed a phone call or anything, but there was nothing. Just my empty home and me in my robe and the hulking rock of granite standing at my front door.
It was obvious why his friends called him what they did.
I drew in a deep breath, then made my way to the door. I reached for the doorknob and paused, trying to collect my thoughts as much as I could. The caffeine had jolted my mind awake, and suddenly a thousand things were swirling around in my head at once. It was the second round of knocks on my door that ripped me from my trance, and soon I was ripping it open to take in the massive mound of a man in front of me.
He looked down at me with his cold gray eyes before a grin crossed his cheeks.
“Two cups or three?” Rock asked.
“Shut up and get in here,” I said.
“Sure thing, Momma.”
He brushed passed me to get inside and brushed his chiseled arm against my breasts. I had no idea why his new nickname for me warmed me as much as it did, but I enjoyed the way it tumbled from his lips. I closed the door and locked it, taking a deep breath before I turned around.
And when I did, Rock was standing in my hallway staring at me.
“Rough morning with Gavin?” he asked.
“Nope,” I said. “Rough morning with my thoughts.”
“Then let’s sit down and talk.”
“You want a beer?”
“At nine in the morning?” he asked.
“When the hell did that ever stop you?” I asked.
His small grin grew into a mischievous smile before he nodded his head. And I was thankful, because that meant I wouldn’t feel so shitty for enjoying a beer myself. I walked into the kitchen and felt him on my heels, hovering over me with that humongous shadow of his. I opened the refrigerator and dipped in to grab two beers, then Rock promptly reached over my shoulder and took them from my hands.
“Let’s go sit down,” he said.
I scoffed before shutting my fridge with a thud. I looked over at him, watching as he made his way to my couch. He sat down as if he fucking lived there. Just plopped right onto the cushions and kicked his damn shoes off. I drew in a deep breath while he popped the tops off the beers with his hands, trying to calm myself as best as I could.
Then I went and sat beside him, pressing myself as close to the opposite edge of the couch as I could.
“You wanted to talk?” I asked
He held out my beer for me and I took it. But the second our fingers landed upon one another’s a jolt of electricity shot up my arm.
I jerked my hand back, taking the beer with me so I could continue putting space between us.
“I did,” Rock said. “I wanted to talk with you more about Gavin.”
“What about him?” I asked.
“Don’t play stupid, Piper. It doesn't suit you.”
“You already know where I stand with that. I’m assuming you’re over here to talk about something else.”
“Well, I’m not.”
“Then you’ve wasted both of our mornings and two decent beers,” I said.
“Come on, Piper. Gavin’s my boy.”
“No, he’s my boy, Rock. He’s your biological son. It takes more than getting a woman pregnant to make you a father,” I said.
“I know that. You don’t think I fucking know that?”
“No. I really don’t think you do.”
> “Then what the hell do I have to do to prove it to you?”
“I don’t know,” I said.
“What’s really holding this up?” he asked.
“Nothing’s being held up. I have to protect my son.”
“Then let’s start with the two guys you apparently let into your life that got close enough to my son before you shoved them out the damn door. Is that protecting Gavin?”
“I’ll ignore that cheap shot and give you one last chance before I throw your ass out onto the curb and call the damn police,” I said.
I brought my beer to my lips and chugged it down, not letting up once until every last drop was consumed.
“I see you’re still the drinker I remember you to be.”
“Raising your son does that to me,” I said flatly.
My eyes panned over to him as a chuckle fell from his lips.
“Just like his dad?” he asked.
“You have no fucking idea.”
“I’d like to.”
I sighed and closed my eyes as I shook my head.
“You can’t possibly think the life you lead is suitable for a kid, Rock.”
“I don’t. It’s why I’m helping the club clean up their act,” he said.
“Then we can revisit this discussion once you do,” I said.
“I’d really enjoy talking about this now.”
“And I’d really enjoy taking a vacation to Bora Bora, but we can’t always get what we fucking want, Rock.”
“Why are you so angry?” he asked.
“Because I’m a single mother and suddenly the father of my child wants to act like none of the shit that happened between us existed.”
“The only things I remember are the good things, Piper. Are you remembering that summer differently from me?”
I leaned back onto the arm of the couch before I set my beer bottle down onto the floor.
“My pregnancy with Gavin was hard,” I said.
I listened to Rock shift his body towards me as his eyes held the profile of my face.
“I mean, from the second my body started experiencing symptoms, they were over the top. The nausea. The vomiting. The breast pain. It all just… happened overnight.”
“Did you have anyone with you to help?” he asked.
“No,” I said. “Just me. I was still grieving the loss of my father and it was just… too much.”
“What happened, Piper?”
“For a few weeks there, I--”
I tucked my hands between my thighs to keep them from shaking.
“You can talk to me, Piper.”
“I thought about aborting Gavin,” I said with a whisper.
I felt the couch beside me dip before a warmth settled at my side.
“I had no idea what I was going to do. I’d just lost my father and you had just gone to jail and I still had no idea if I was going to continue medical school. I zoned out in classes and stayed up all night vomiting, and the only thing I kept thinking was ‘I can’t have that man’s child. He’s a criminal’.”
His arm slid around my waist and the comfort that wafted through my body forced tears down my cheeks.
“Look at me, Piper.”
“I can’t,” I said. “Because every time I do I have to contend with the fact that I almost ended it. I have to contend with the fact that I almost rid this planet of the most incredible, vivacious, loving boy I’ve ever come across. And I almost did it, Rock. I sat in front of that doctor’s office for two hours debating on it.”
I felt his fingers crook underneath my chin before he gripped it and pulled my gaze up to his.
“There you are,” he said.
“I almost didn’t have our son, Rock,” I said breathlessly.
“And not a damn soul would’ve judged you for it. Not me. Not the guys. Not Brewer. Not no one.”
“How can you say that? How can you possibly look at me after telling you that?”
“You were young, Piper. You’d just lost your father. You were in the middle of medical school. I’d just gotten arrested. You were completely alone in this. Not a damn soul on this planet--including myself--would’ve judged you for that decision.”
“I judge myself every day.”
“For a choice you didn’t make,” he said. “If I judged myself on every fucking thought I had, I wouldn’t be doing anything else.”
I giggled breathlessly as his hand slipped from my chin.
“You’re strong, Piper. You’ve always been strong. So, tell me why you chose to keep Gavin.”
“It’s selfish,” I said.
“Nothing’s ever as selfish as we think it is,” he said.
I shook my head and looked out the window as his hand tightened around my waist.
“Answer my question, Piper.”
“I kept Gavin because I didn’t want to be alone,” I said.
I brought my hand up to my cheeks to quickly wipe away my tears.
“I chose to continue with my medical career so I could provide for him, but I chose to keep him because I had no one else. No parents. No friends. No family of any sort. I figured that was my last shot at having any semblance of a family, so I drove away from the doctor’s office and got myself an ice cream cone instead.”
He tugged on my body one last time and my head fell onto his shoulder. His warmth blanketed me. His strength throbbed against me. For the first time in years, I felt as if I could relax my body against something and it not turn around to bite me in the ass.
“As a father, it’s my job to protect and provide. But as a man, it’s my job to be here for you and make sure you get to rest as much as you get to thrive,” Rock said. “I know we’ve got differences. I know the man I used to be wasn’t into all this shit.”
“All this shit,” I said with a snicker.
“But you’re not the young girl I knew and I’m not the young boy you knew. Five years have passed us by. A shit ton changes in that amount of time.”
“But not that foul mouth of yours. That’s something you’ll have to watch in front of Gavin.”
The words came tumbling out of my mouth before I caught them.
“Does that mean you’re gonna give me a chance?” he asked.
I slowly tilted my gaze up to meet his before I drew in a deep breath.
“I think we could start with some supervised attention, sure,” I said.
Something flashed in Rock’s eyes that made my skin pucker. Something primal and wanton. But there was something hopeful in his eyes as well. Something that drew back, like curtains letting in the sun. His arm flexed, tilting my body towards his as his hand tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. My eyes danced between his, taking in the way his cold gray eyes ignited with a fire I hadn’t seen in a man’s eyes in years.
“Rock?” I asked breathlessly.
“Yes, Piper?”
“I missed you these past few years.”
In a flash, his lips were on mine. My back sank to the cushions of my couch as his rock-hard body draped over mine. His tongue pushed through my lips, taking what he knew was his from the second he walked through the door. All he had required was a bit of permission. The smallest entrance before he came barreling through.
And I had willingly given it to him.
His hands tugged at the bow around my waist before smoothing my robe open. His hand slid up my shirt, palming my naked breast and grazing his thumb over my nipple. My lips swelled against his as he coaxed my tits to engorged peaks. My legs spread to accommodate his thick body, feeling his cock throbbing soundly against my thigh.
“Fucking hell, Piper,” he said into my lips. “I’ve dreamt about your body for years.”
He kissed down my cheek and nibbled on my neck. My hands threaded into the thick forest of black hair he had on top of his head. He shoved my shirt up, taking in the eyeful of my breasts before dipping his lips to them. He kissed and sucked. He marked his territory like he had all those years ago. He lapped at my nipples and suckled on them
until I was a shaking, whimpering mess underneath him.
“Oh, I love those fucking sounds of yours,” he said.
He kissed down my stomach, dragging my shorts down along my thick legs. And the second he saw my bare pussy underneath the flimsy fabric, he growled. My chest panted. My skin crawled. My pussy already dripped down my ass crack. It had been years since I’d felt a man against my body. Years since I’d felt a man’s hands against my naked skin.
“You always were luscious, Piper.”
His hands wrapped around my ankles and turned me so my feet planted themselves onto the floor. Then he positioned himself between my thighs and dove between my folds. My back arched and my hands curled into his hair. I looked down at the massive man between my legs, his broad shoulders keeping my knees open as I laid against the back of the couch. I was helpless to his tongue’s attack. I wiggled and squirmed as fire shot through my veins. He lapped at my clit and sucked it between his lips. He used his thumbs to part me before pressing the whole of his tongue against my most sensitive areas. I felt alive. Beautiful. Cherished, for the first time since I’d had Gavin.
For the first time since I’d first met Rock.
“Holy fuck,” I said breathlessly. “Don’t stop. Keep going, Rock. Shit. Oh, shit baby.”
He hummed his appreciation into my body and that was all it took. My hips lunged off the couch and pressed against his face as my jaw unhinged in silent pleasure. My thighs clamped down around his cheeks and my toes curled. Sensations I had only dealt myself since I’d found out I was pregnant washed through my body while Rock’s lips held steady. His tongue raked against my clit, sending me over the edge again and again until I couldn't catch my breath.
Sweat dripped down the back of my neck by the time I collapsed to the couch.
“What a breakfast,” Rock said as he came up for air.
I felt him slide his fingers up my dripping slit as I opened my eyes. I watched him gather my arousal on the edges of his skin before he darted his tongue out, making a show of licking me off his appendages. I marveled at the sight. At the primal look in his eyes as my juices melted on the tip of his tongue.
Rock (Dead Souls MC Book 4) Page 8