by M. E. James
Yet she also feared that going to Sebastian would be putting the child in harm's way. Having him rip her and her child to shreds was one of her deepest fears. Yet if he'd wanted to kill her, wouldn't he have done so already? The truth of the matter was, she may have been shocked, confused, betrayed, and angry, but deep down, she was certain that Sebastian wouldn't lay a hand on her. Call it instinct or just plain naive trust, but at that moment, it was what she believed.
"So, what do you think?" Her dad examined her.
The next words were the hardest thing she'd ever had to say in her entire life. "I'll go talk with him."
She gasped as if it had caused her physical pain to say the words.
"Good." For the first time that morning, her dad grinned.
Her mom beamed. "Now, let's all have breakfast. I know that this isn't the best situation, but since it's happening anyway, we should make the most of it."
As the tension dispersed, Emmy realized that everything was going to be okay. Her parents had let things go—and had begun to accept her baby as well.
"So, what are the chances that this kid is a boy?" Her dad was trying to act neutral, but she could see he was hiding a smile.
"I don't know, about fifty-fifty." She grinned.
"Smart aleck." Her dad tousled her hair.
"Your father has always longed to have a little boy," her mom said. "He wants somebody to hassle into joining a football team."
"That's something you'll have to take up with God." Emmy snorted. "I'm afraid I don't have much control over the gender."
Her dad clasped his hands together. "Please God, let it be a boy."
"I'm going to pray it's a girl," her mom whispered in her ear.
"I heard that." Her dad narrowed his eyes. "No counter praying."
"What, are you afraid that God will pick favorites?" Her mom batted her eyes.
"Women." Her dad threw up his hands.
Emmy snorted and headed over to the table.
****
After a massive breakfast of pancakes, eggs, and yes, bacon, Emmy stared at her phone with her eyes narrowed. She knew that she had to call Sebastian. Still she was so terrified that her palms were slick with sweat. And to think, she'd thought that she was scared when she had to tell Sebastian that she was pregnant. This was so much worse. After all, she was facing something that she didn't understand and had yet to come to accept—werewolves.
Oh, buck up, already, she told herself as she paced around the bedroom. Groaning, she scrolled through her cell phone's directory and saw Sebastian's name. She squeezed her eyes shut and hit call.
The phone rang. Never before had the sound of a phone been quite so terrifying. As she prayed he wouldn't answer, she sank down onto the bed.
Unfortunately, that was when Sebastian picked up.
"Emmy, thank God," Sebastian said as a way of greeting. "I've been worried sick about you."
"Sebastian." She was surprised by the rush of happiness she felt at the sound of his voice, especially after how nervous she'd been about talking with him.
"I'm so sorry about everything, sweetheart," he said.
Her bottom lip quivered. "Tell me it isn't true. Tell me that you aren't a…a…werewolf."
"You know that I can't do that. I am what I am." He was sorrowful. "But I promise I won't hurt you. I'm not dangerous."
So it was true. He was a werewolf. Despite the fact she'd known it already, she felt like she'd been shoved off a cliff and was hurtling toward the ground. If she'd been standing up, she would have worried about falling on her face.
"I see." Her chest heaved.
"What convinced you that I'm a werewolf?" he asked.
"I saw Jake." Her heart ached. "He changed into a you-know-what. That was all it took."
The image of werewolf Jake lunging straight at her plagued her mind. She flinched.
"He didn't hurt you, did he?" Sebastian sounded furious. "If he so much as touched you, I'll rip him apart limb from limb."
"He didn't lay a hand on me." She chewed on a nail.
Still that didn't change the fact that Jake's imagine would be burned in her brain for the rest of her life. She'd forever remember his anger, the way he'd turned toward her with fury in his eyes. And then there were his claws and long, sharp teeth. If he sank those fangs into her body, she would be dead almost instantly.
"I'm glad he didn't hurt you," Sebastian said, drawing her from her thoughts.
"Me too." She groaned. "That was the scariest moment of my life."
"I wish I could have been there to protect you," Sebastian said. "And even now, I miss you."
"I know." Though she missed him too, she couldn't bring herself to say it. "But I'm scared, Sebastian. You lied to me. I don't know if I can trust you again."
"I can explain everything." Sebastian's voice dripped with pain. "Please. Give me a chance."
Her dad's words echoed in her ears. "I think you need to discuss it with him and give him a chance to be a proper parent. If you don't, it's not just you who'll be missing out. It's the baby as well." A chance. Her whole life, she'd believed that love was an uncontrollable emotion. But this was the first time she realized that love was a choice. She had to choose it, even though it would be much easier to turn her back on him for forever.
And at that moment, she made her choice.
"I'll give you a chance to explain, but you have to answer all of my questions." Emmy's fist clenched at her side.
"Oh, Emmy, thank you." Sebastian groaned in relief.
"Just tell me everything." She wasn't in the mood to be thanked.
Sebastian sighed. "I'll talk. Don't worry."
"Good." Emmy longed to get the answers that he'd kept from her. "Now tell me, were you bitten by a werewolf? Is that why you are the way that you are?"
"This isn't a movie," Sebastian said. "Real werewolves are born, not made. I could bite a human a thousand times, and it wouldn't do anything."
"Except kill them," she muttered.
"Well, yes. And on that note, I've never killed a human," Sebastian said firmly. "I never will either."
"But what about when the full moon comes out?" She could imagine him running amuck, ripping people to shreds. "Don't you lose control?"
"Once again, movie theme." She could picture him rolling his eyes. "I'm always myself, even when I change."
"Then what about Jake?" She'd seen the intense anger in werewolf Jake's eyes. It had been frightening. "When he changed, he was like a wild animal."
"There are bad humans who want to hurt people," Sebastian said. "There are also bad werewolves. The shift doesn't change who we are inside. Jake is always a monster no matter what form he's in."
For a moment Emmy didn't say anything. Instead she tried to digest the fact that she was talking to Sebastian about werewolves. She squeezed her eyes shut and dug her fingers into her jeans. It wouldn't have surprised her if she awoke from sleep and realized this had all been some sort of nightmare.
"Sweetheart?" Sebastian said, pulling her from her thoughts. "Are you there?"
"Yeah, I'm here." She took a deep breath. "Tell me the real reason why Jake is after us."
"I'm sure you know by now that werewolves come in packs—"
"There are a lot of you?" she interrupted. Though she'd known that werewolves came in packs, the thought hadn't entered her mind until that moment.
"Yes," said Sebastian patiently. "And I'm the pack Alpha."
"Wait, what?" Her heart thudded hard. "You're some sort of…of…leader?"
That meant he was strong. She bit her bottom lip.
"Yes, I am," Sebastian said. "That's why I could never answer your questions whenever you asked what I do. You see, I manage the pack."
"On the day that I came to tell you that I was pregnant, the pack was at your house." Her eyes widened as realization struck. "They were waiting for your instructions."
"Some of my pack was there, yes," Sebastian said. "Those there relayed messages to the o
thers."
"And Jake is after me because you're the Alpha?"
"Well, he feels that I took something from him." Sebastian sounded pained. "I was chosen to be Alpha instead of him. Now he wants to take something away from me—you and my baby."
Her heart was aching. It wouldn't have surprised her if it beat itself right out of her chest. "There was so much I didn't know."
"I'm sorry."
"Why didn't you tell me?" She shook her head. "I know that you said you were a werewolf, but why didn't you try harder to convince me? You had to know I wouldn't believe you."
"I was scared." His voice sounded soft, softer than she'd ever heard it.
"Of what?" What did a big, bad werewolf have to be frightened of?
"Of losing you, of hurting the baby." Sebastian made a strangled sound. "Look, I know I should have explained everything, but I was afraid that the stress might hurt you. And what if you lost the baby when you found out about me? I thought by keeping it a secret, I was protecting you."
If Sebastian hadn't spoken in such a hurt, desperate tone, she wouldn't have believed him. Yet his voice said more than words ever could. Though she had yet to accept what he was, some of her wounds began to heal. Now she was glad she'd spoken to him after all. Despite the fear, despite everything, it had been worth it.
"Please tell me that you'll forgive me." His voice was soft. "Tell me that I can see you again. I want to be a part of the baby's life…and I want to be a part of yours."
Her teeth clenched as she sucked in air. "I won't be able to accept what you are overnight. I'm still scared of you. The thought of what you are…it makes me hurt."
"I know. But even if it takes you a while to accept it, I know you can handle this," Sebastian said. "We're meant to be, after all."
"What do you mean?" Her eyes widened in surprise.
"You're my mate, sweetheart," he said. "When I met you, I knew that you were meant for me. You're the person that I'm supposed to be with forever, the woman who is destined to have my children and be my partner for life."
"M-mate?" The word sound so primitive.
"Yes. You're my eternal companion, the love of my life," he said.
The words made her stiffen. "Are you serious?"
"Yes," he said.
This whole thing was unbelievable. "I don't know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything," he said.
And she didn't. Instead she became silent in her confusion. Her, a mate of a werewolf Alpha? It didn't make any sense. After all, she was terrified of werewolves. That didn't exactly make her first pick as a werewolf's mate. She needed time to digest all of this, which meant that she had to change the topic to something else. Now. Good thing that was easy for her to do.
"Even though I'm supposedly your mate, I don't know the first thing about raising a werewolf child," she said. "I don't think it will be like taking care of your average baby."
"The baby will just need love, same as any other child," he said. "And I have no doubt that you'll be the best mother in the world."
"Oh, Sebastian." She sighed. "Sometimes I wonder what I'd do without you."
And other times she wondered why she wasn't running away, screaming.
"So does that mean you'll take me back?" Sebastian asked.
"I…I…"
She could picture him with the phone pressed against his ear, his jaw rigid as he waited for her response.
"I'll take you back." The words left her mouth in a gasp.
"Thank God." Sebastian sounded as though he was a dying man who'd just been told he was going to live. "I want to protect you. How can I do that when I can't be near you?"
"We'll have to take things slow," she warned him.
"I know." He sighed.
"Where are you, anyway?" she asked. "Are you still at Mary Lou's?"
"No, I'm waiting at your place," he said. "I thought you'd come home sooner or later."
"And Jake?" She shivered in fear. "What's happening with him?"
"My brother is tracking him," he said.
Both of them were silent for a moment. She stared down at her quivering hands.
"Sweetheart," he said.
"Uh-huh?"
"Can I come pick you up now?" Sebastian's voice was soft. "I want to bring you someplace where I can look after you."
Though she hesitated, she eventually said, "Yes."
"Where are you?"
"At my parents' house." And she knew it was time she left. "I'll drive back to you."
"I think it'll be better if I drive to you," Sebastian said.
For a horrifying moment, she imagined her dad with his gun. "Are you worried about bullet wounds?"
"Excuse me?" Sebastian choked.
"My dad might snap," she said. "When he found out I was pregnant, he didn't take it too well. He might see you and lose it."
"I think I can handle a gunshot wound."
Her eyebrow twitched. "I hate how it sounds like you've been shot before."
"Only twice," he said.
She gasped.
"Kidding," he said.
"I could kill you right now." Either that, or send him the world's dirtiest glare.
"Uh-huh," Sebastian said. "I'll make it easier for you to kill me by coming over. Give me the address."
Emmy rattled off the address, stunned that she was going to meet the man who both enthused and terrified her.
****
Emmy knew it took about an hour to reach her parents' house. And since two hours had gone by and Sebastian still hadn't arrived, she was horrified. Though the man had hidden the fact that he was a werewolf from her, she knew that he was prudent. He never would dawdle when he knew that she was waiting for him to pick her up. And that was a problem because that meant that something was really, seriously wrong.
As Emmy drummed her fingers on the table, her dad paced in front of her as her mom stirred the filling for a chocolate cream pie.
"I can see what you mean about this man being an unfit parent." Her dad checked his watch. "Can't he read a clock? It doesn't take this long to get back from Seattle."
"Maybe the traffic is bad." As her mom said the words, she cast a worried glance at the clock.
"Or he's messing around," her dad said.
"No, this isn't like him." She stood up. "I think something's wrong."
"Something's wrong, all right." Her dad groused.
Emmy didn't say anything and just stared out the window. As the ticking of the clock became louder, she thought, Maybe I should go after him. He would do the same for me. And yet she knew that would be sheer stupidity. It would be one thing to put herself in danger, but it would be another thing entirely to put her baby at risk. Right now, she had to play it safe as much as possible.
Even if it meant staying at her parents' house.
Still, as her mom turned on the mixer and made chocolate pudding, Emmy's frustration grew. And that was why, when she heard somebody knock on the door, she cried out in relief. Sebastian was here, after all. Maybe he'd had car trouble. Maybe he'd rescued a woman who was about to get squashed by a BMW. Hell, maybe an alien had stolen all of the wheels from his car. Hey, stranger things have happened, right?
Despite all of the mishaps that could have happened, her dad remained frustrated.
"About time," he muttered.
The man stomped over to the door, and Emmy followed behind him, frightened that the man might punch Sebastian instead of shake his hand. Unfortunately, when her dad opened the door, Sebastian wasn't standing on the welcome mat. It was Mary Lou instead, wearing a wrinkled blue tank top and a pair of skinny jeans three sizes too small. When her dad saw Mary Lou's outfit, he muttered a curse and clapped his hand to his head.
Emmy, too tired to care about her dad's way of greeting her friend, stepped onto the front porch. "What the heck are you doing here?"
"Some way to say hello," Mary Lou said.
"I told you to go hide somewhere." Emmy glanced warily at the
street, her hair standing on end.
"I needed to speak with you." Mary Lou looked at her dad. "Can we talk somewhere private? You know, someplace where it's just the two of us."
"Just the two of us?" Emmy's heart raced. Mary Lou wasn't acting like herself. "Is something wrong?"
"Yeah, I found out that I have chlamydia," Mary Lou said quickly, as if she'd just thought of it.
Her dad's mouth dropped open.
"So you're the person who's been influencing my daughter to do sinful things." Her dad pointed at Mary Lou. "Aren't you old enough to know better?"
"What the hell are you talking about?" Mary Lou scowled. "I'm twenty-six."
Now that was more like Mary Lou. Still, when Emmy examined her friend, she knew that something was off. Yeah, the woman was wearing an outfit that looked like it had been purchased at Hookers-R-Us, but she hadn't applied any mascara. For an ordinary woman, that wouldn't have meant anything. But this was Mary Lou. Mary Lou wouldn't have gone without mascara even during a full-fledged zombie apocalypse. There was something wrong—maybe it even had to do with why Sebastian had not shown up yet—and Emmy was determined to find out what.
"Dad, can you give us some privacy?" Emmy glanced at her dad.
The man hesitated. Though he'd met Mary Lou before, the woman had been much less expressive during their last conversation. And on top of that, Emmy hadn't been pregnant then either.
"Of course, you can stay if you have something to add to the conversation." Mary Lou batted her eyes at him. "I'm always surprised by the number of people who know tidbits about chlamydia."