I stopped there, knowing I was just killing time to avoid the reality that waited behind me in my bed. Whatever happened next had to be done carefully. Rose was vulnerable and when that happened, she gave me her heart and body in ways that I could only ever dream about.
I left my phone on the counter and shut off the light. The entire apartment went dark with the exception of a faint light coming through a window next to my bed. That was from a streetlight at the corner of the parking lot. It was bright enough that I saw the silhouette of my bed and the silhouette of Rose’s body.
When I got to the bed, I went to what was now her side. I reached for her, my fingertips touching her back. She instantly shivered and made a purring sound. Oh, the shit that noise did to my body…
I ran my hand down and touched the sheets. I grasped them and pulled them down her body. All the way, off her feet, and off the bed. I slid my left hand up the back of her leg, inching slowly, cutting to the inside of her thigh. I grinned as her body started to stir. It wasn’t until I touched her sweet and warm center did I get her full attention. Fuck, she had my full attention.
Her knees bent a little as she stuck her ass in the air.
“Oh, fuck,” I whispered.
I leaned down, putting my right hand to the bed. My left hand eased along her flower, touching her wet petals. Two fingers, curling, opening her, sliding inside her. Rose let out a groan as I sank my fingers into her. My other hand moved from the bed to her ass. Touching and cupping her, kneading her as my other hand pleasured her. Sliding and thrusting, loving her as she was stuck somewhere between sleep and a dream.
She started to sigh louder, her body gently rocking back and forth at my touch.
I gritted my teeth and started to move faster. Harder.
I took my hand off her ass and grabbed the front of my jeans. I hurried to open them and wrestled them down so I could kick them off. Why the fuck had I even bothered to put them back on?
I climbed onto to the bed, my fingers still guiding their way in and out of her. Feeling her arousal in the form of heat and a soft wet sound that echoed around the apartment.
I moved over her, sliding my fingers out and up along her ass and to her lower back. Leaving her own sweetness to stick against her skin, a little reminder of how fucking beautiful she was. I lowered myself down and kissed between her shoulder blades.
That’s when she turned her head and tried to look at me.
“It’s okay, Rose,” I whispered. “I’m right here.”
I reached down and grabbed my cock. I eased against her body, between her legs, feeling her body welcome me.
I sank down into her with a groan. My mouth opened and let out a breathless sound and then bit at my pillow.
She made a whimpering noise as I pressed as hard as I could, feeling her clenching against me, damn near making me explode right then and there.
I kissed Rose’s shoulder as I pulled back and thrust forward again.
And I kept kissing her shoulder. To her back. Up to her neck, fighting with her fruity smelling hair. Her body pumping back against me, my right hand gripping her hip, my middle finger hooking around her hipbone so I could pull her as I fucked her.
Except… I didn’t move any faster. I gave her everything I had, slowly. With purpose. Inch by inch.
Rose turned her head to look at me, her mouth moving, but no sounds coming out. I strained my neck so I could kiss her. She put her hands to the bed and pushed a little. But I was too strong for her. And I didn’t want her to make a move. She succumbed and remained on her belly as I loved her. Her left hand scrunched up the sheets. Her right hand reached back and touched my ass.
I growled under my breath, fighting off the intense urge to pull back and bring her to her knees. Instead, I stayed in the same position, long and thorough thrusts, as slow as I could manage, feeling every inch of her body and mine.
Fuck, I was… I was making love to her.
Our hearts were bleeding all over my bed, a mess like the one between her legs.
And we both knew it was only a matter of time before we stomped on each other’s hearts.
She sat at my table the next morning wearing one of my long t-shirts and nothing else. Her hair was a pretty mess from sleep. The way she could take her hair and just pull it all to one side. Sitting there with a mug in front of her, me standing at the counter, watching her as she slid a finger along the screen of her phone.
I smiled.
This was nice.
It was good.
“Sorry,” she said. “I’m just trying to…”
“Don’t worry about it, Rose,” I said. “Work stuff.”
“Yeah.” She hit the screen a few times and frowned. “I should call the hospital.”
“Yes you should.”
Rose looked up at me. “Last night…”
“Last night,” I said. “I think we both needed that.”
“Yeah,” she whispered, her cheeks turning a light shade of red.
I pushed from the counter and grabbed a chair and pulled it out. I sat down. I reached for her hand. “Hey. You okay today?”
“I don’t know,” Rose said.
“I think we should talk now. I know you didn’t want to last night. But maybe you could get some of that stuff off your chest.”
“I don’t want to bother you, Foster.”
“Bother me?” I asked with a smile. “You’ve been bothering me for a long time, Rose. Why stop now?”
“Because when we bother each other, we hurt each other.”
“I’m not going to hurt you, Rose. I’m easing back and letting you take the lead here. I’m sorry about your father. But you called me. That has to mean something. I’m the only person who understands everything.”
“So then tell me what I’m feeling,” she said, raising her eyebrow.
Oh, I loved when she got cocky like that. When she’d try to get bitchy and put up her wall.
I smirked. “Fine. You’re comparing your father to your mother. A sudden scare and it’s got you rattled. You know that someday he’s not going to be around, but you’re hoping that his time will be long enough to make up for the time you didn’t get with your mother. And last night… that was just simple need, Rose. We all need that. Aching heart, confused mind, so you wash it away with something else.”
Rose turned her head. “Nope. You’re wrong.”
“I am?” I asked. “Look me in the eyes and tell me I’m wrong.”
Rose looked at me. Squinting her eyes a little. Trying to be so tough.
I leaned forward a little. Not blinking.
“Go ahead,” I whispered. “Tell me I’m wrong.”
There was silence.
Then Rose stuck out her tongue.
I laughed. “That’s what I thought.”
“Shut up, Kingsley,” she said, taking a jab at my real name.
“Eat it, Slug,” I said back.
She leaned forward. “Make me…”
I leaned even further forward. “You’re such a baby, Rose.”
“You’re a jerk,” she said.
My left hand touched her face and I pulled her toward me. Her chair shot back and we started to kiss. Two seconds later I had her on my lap, straddling me. My hands quickly finding the bottom of the long shirt, cutting under it so I could feel bare skin. I was eye level with her as she sat on my lap. We kissed wildly, the same kind of kiss that started the night off last night.
My hands raced up the shirt and up her body. Both hands finding her full breasts, palms sliding over them. Rose drove her hips down, grinding herself against me, feeling how instantly hard she made me.
The kiss broke when her phone started to ring.
She groaned and looked back. I quickly kissed at her neck, teasing her.
“Fuck,” she said. “It’s Vivian. I need…”
I pulled my lips away. “I know. Take the call.”
I stood up, her in my lap. I put her on her feet and spun her around. My hand
slapped her ass playfully as I gritted my teeth. In my gut, I was aching to take her back to my bed. To just stay there for days.
“Hey, Viv,” she said as she took the call and walked away.
My phone started to buzz. It was a number I didn’t recognize so I ignored it. Nothing was more important than Rose and her family. I watched the way she paced the floor. From the couch to the bed. Her free hand playing with her hair. We never got the chance to live together. Just those casual encounters that turned into intense and passionate stays.
It made me wonder what last night actually was. Casual? Intense? Passionate?
I picked up my coffee mug as Rose said her goodbyes to Vivian. She came back into the kitchen, rolling her eyes.
“I guess my note wasn’t good enough,” she said.
“What?”
“I left a note for Vivian. She passed out on the couch and I couldn’t sleep. So…”
“You bothered me,” I said.
“Bothered you. Exactly.”
“What did she have to say about Frank?”
“He should be able to leave in a few days, depending on how he does. So far, it looks good. Once he gets home, it’s a whole other recovery process. He’s not going to be happy about any of this.”
“I’ll be there, Rose,” I said. “Whatever you need.”
She looked at me. She smiled. Her heart wanted to believe it, but the rest of her knew better.
“I’m not messing around,” I said. “Whatever he needs. I owe it to him. And I want to do it for you.”
“Is this your attempt at getting into my pants?”
“To be fair, you’re not wearing any pants. And I was already in them. If that’s all I wanted, then I could just shuffle you away for good. That’s not me, Rose. You know that.”
She hesitated for a few seconds. “What happened before…”
“It was a mess before. You know that. We were both a mess, Rose. Where was that going to end up? I told you that the one thing I never wanted was us to hate each other so much that we’d never talk again.”
“Then it wasn’t real enough,” she whispered.
“What?”
“It wasn’t real enough, Foster. If it was that real and that good, then losing everything is worth it.”
“Right. Real? Good? What do you think last night was? That wasn’t out of need, Rose. That was everything I had been waiting for… you and I together in a way we both wanted like that. You want to talk about worth everything? You’re worth everything.”
“I just thought before…”
I stepped toward her. “It was real, Rose. It’s always been real. From our first kiss to the first time I had you. I don’t know why things happen the way they do. But I’m standing right here. You tell me what we need to do and I’m there.”
Rose looked up and shook her head. “I guess I should get home and shower. Get changed.”
“You could shower here. The water is fantastic.”
“Is it now?” she asked.
“You can’t imagine.”
“That’s tempting.”
“Well, let me keep tempting you…”
I touched the long t-shirt and started to lift it up. Rose stood there for a few seconds before wiggling away.
“Down boy,” she said. “I have to get things done today.”
“And every good day starts with a hot shower. A really long, hot shower.”
I lifted the bottom of my t-shirt and took it off. I threw it to the table.
“Foster…”
I touched the front of my jeans and started to open them.
Rose jumped at me, putting her hand to mine. “What the hell are you doing?”
“What? I’m getting naked so I could take a shower.”
“You strip in the kitchen?”
“I strip wherever I feel like it. Why? Afraid you’ll see something you like?”
Rose eased her hand down and had a handful of me over my jeans. She moved to her toes and pressed her lips to my neck.
“Oh, I know I like it, Foster. I fucking love it. You’ll just have to wait for me…”
She kissed my neck again and backed away.
My hands balled up tight as I realized I had just lost a battle to her. She backed away and grabbed the long t-shirt and lifted it up. Showing off her light pink panties and then kept going, all the way up, stopping before she showed me her chest. She spun around and took the shirt off and dropped it to the floor.
She walked across my apartment to get the rest of her clothes as I stood there like stone. And believe me, I was like stone. Everywhere.
I took a deep breath and nodded, knowing I was still in love with her.
I turned and saw that the mystery number that had called had left me a voicemail.
“Foster, I’ll give you a call when I get situated,” Rose called out.
“Whatever you need,” I said as I started to play the voicemail.
Rose started talking again. Her voice faded out though as I listened to the message.
I shut my eyes, feeling any ounce of hope that Rose gave me slip away.
My father was getting out of prison… again.
WHEN THEY WERE YOUNG
18
They Were Nice People
Foster
Jack and Nancy were good people. Nice people. A nice house in a nice neighborhood. I vaguely picked up on the stories of how Nancy couldn’t get pregnant, and how Jack had taken a second mortgage on the house to pay for treatments that never seemed to work. So the next logical thing was to take in a punk kid like me. The truth of it all was that I think they did it as a good showing to the big guy upstairs, because they both knew I’d be eighteen soon enough. Then I’d be out of their hair.
Hell, maybe they were using me to get good graces so they could adopt a baby.
Whatever it was, good for them.
They gave me a room with a bed and a TV. They made sure I had three meals a day. Jack even came through on a promise to get me a guitar. It was a pretty nice one too. Had to have cost him a bunch of pennies to do that. But what did I care? It wasn’t my money.
Tonight I had everything worked out perfectly.
Jack had some guys night out thing with people from college. He did it every few weeks. He’d trade in his suit and try to look all cool in a t-shirt and slick his hair back. Nancy would make fun of him but walk him to the front door and kiss him about a hundred times. Strange how watching them kiss made me jealous. Not because I liked Nancy or anything, hell no. I mean, yeah, sure, she was pretty, but she was twice my age and she didn’t fit my type. It was watching two people who loved each other. Two people who wanted to have a family but couldn’t. Yet I was there, the end result of who-knows-what, without a family. I didn’t get why the universe did that shit to people.
Normally Nancy would be home. But tonight she was going out too. She was going to her friend’s house for some wine, cheese, and gossip.
That left me alone. In the big house that would never be mine.
But the whole being alone in the house thing meant nothing to me. That wasn’t the point of my night. The point of the night was something so much more.
Rose was going to be home alone too. Frank took Vivian to some shitty pop concert. And he trusted Rose to be home alone. Which meant I could finally sneak over to her house and be there with her alone. And by being alone, it meant something very special for both of us. I had offered to bring her here. To this really nice house. To the bedroom that was temporarily mine. It was a big room with a big and comfortable bed.
But Rose wanted it to be at her house. Her room. Which I was totally fine with. I didn’t care where my time with Rose was spent. I just wanted her. I just wanted to be near her. The last six months had been super wild. Her father could have kicked me out and away at any time, but he kept things civil with me and set rules that I followed. I knew in my heart that going over there while he wasn’t home probably wasn’t smart… but he never told me not to do it.<
br />
Plus, watching Rose break the rules a little for once in her life made me smile.
For the first time in my life I stopped at the mirror in the foyer and looked at myself because I cared how I looked. I wore a faded leather jacket, my hair too long and too messy, but that was me. There was no hiding who I was.
I was ready to have a night we’d both never forget.
I opened the door to leave and froze.
Someone was standing there. It wasn’t Jack or Nancy. It wasn’t Rose or her father.
“Dad…”
“You going to fucking hug me or what?”
My father stood there in a long sleeved shirt with the sleeves pushed up to his elbows. His forearms were covered in random patches of tattoos, many of them not even real pictures. He had a five o’clock shadow and his eyes were heavy. Wrinkles on his forehead. His dark hair fluffy with strands of gray.
“Dad,” I whispered.
“Son.”
“When… how…”
He laughed. He put a hand to my shoulder and squeezed. It hurt. He was the strongest man I’d ever met. Sometimes I envisioned Frank and my father fighting, wondering who would win.
“I got out, son,” he said. “Did my time. Good behavior.”
“So you’re free now?”
“Yeah.”
“So I can come live with you?”
“I don’t know, son,” he said, looking around. “I might want to come live here.”
I smiled. “No. It’s all fake here, Dad.”
“You doing good?”
“I guess. Hey, are you allowed here?”
“No.”
“You can go right back to jail…”
“I needed to see my son,” he said.
It made my heart feel things when he said stuff like that. Normally he was just drunk and angry. Forcing me into one of his moneymaking schemes. Waiting to get caught and tossed back into jail. But he looked different now. Rough, yeah. But clean. Sober.
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