“I am—more than willing.” He kissed her again and kept her wrapped up in his arms.
As the sun dipped past the horizon and the light darkened around them, she understood what eternity meant. He would be part of her forever now—the memory, the moment, and the kiss. It was something she would never be able to forget.
It was a bit of a shock to return to the mansion. Cassie thought things would go back to the way they were before. To her surprise, Lucas showed up at her door the very next morning to escort her to breakfast. Every chance he had, he spent his time with her. Even when she was painting he would sometimes sit and watch. It was strange at first, but she began to enjoy having him as her audience.
As the days turned into weeks, the sky didn’t cave in, the world didn’t come to an end, and she and Lucas were just as much in love as ever. It wasn’t until she received a call from her friend Angela that she realized just how much time had passed.
“Do you have your tickets to come home yet?”
“Oh, not yet. I’ll buy them tonight.”
“Cassie, the wedding is in three days! What if you can’t get a ticket?”
“Don’t worry, I will. I wouldn’t miss it for anything. I’m going to book them right now.”
“Okay. Text me the information so I can make sure someone picks you up.”
“I will.” Cassie hung up the phone and opened up her computer.
Lucas looked over at her from where he sat at his desk.
“What’s that about?”
“Oh, remember I told you that I have friends back home getting married. I have to get tickets to fly back. Honestly, I can’t even believe that I forgot to book my flight.”
“Nonsense, we can take the jet.”
“We?” She looked over at him.
“Isn’t it customary to have a date for the wedding?”
“Lucas, you know you can’t just take off like that. Your work is important.”
“If I get called back, I’ll come back.”
“It’s fine. I’ll only be there for a few days.”
He frowned as he studied her. “Why don’t you want me to come?”
“I do, but I don’t think it will be fun for you. You don’t know my friends—and, well, I want to be able to be available to Angela for anything she might need.” She smiled a little. “Will you miss me?”
“You know I will.” He rubbed his chin. “Alright, you can go by yourself, but you will still take the jet.”
“Excuse me?” She raised an eyebrow. “Are you telling me or offering it to me?”
“Telling.” He locked eyes with her.
She sat up straight and narrowed her eyes in return.
“You think that will work with me?”
“I think it has to. It’s time you realize that you’ve become a very important part of my life, Cassie and because of that, you’re vulnerable. People who may want to hurt me may try to do so through hurting you. If you don’t want me to accompany you, you have to at least travel safely.”
“I don’t have to do anything.” She stood up and walked over to his desk.
He sighed and shook his head.
“Is this really something we need to argue about? The fact that I want you to be safe?”
She perched on the edge of his desk and crossed her legs beside him. “What we need to argue about is the idea that you think I’m not capable of keeping myself safe. You can be protective of Emma, I understand that. But I can handle myself.”
He took her hands in his and held them as firmly as he held her gaze. “I won’t lose you, Cassie. I will do everything in my power to make sure that doesn’t happen.”
“I make my own choices.”
“I’m not saying that you don’t. But you also don’t understand the risk that comes with dating someone like me. You don’t understand the twisted minds that have things against me. Some of these people I’ve never even met. They’re just crazy.”
“I do understand. But I also know that it’s not going to change the way that I live my life. I will be careful, I can promise you that.” She eyed him carefully. “And if it will really make you feel that much better, I’ll take your plane.”
He sighed and released her hands. “And you’re going to come back, right?”
“Don’t be silly.” She kissed him and then smiled. “Where else would I want to be?”
He didn’t seem reassured by her words as his eyes searched hers. “Just come back.”
“I will, Lucas, I will.” She laughed and kissed him again.
Until the day of her trip, Lucas was by her side every chance he could be. She could tell he wanted to say something more, perhaps even insist on going on the trip with her, but he didn’t. When it came time to say goodbye, he took her to the airstrip to meet the plane.
“Just call me if you need anything.”
“I’ll be just fine, Lucas. But I think it’s sweet that you’re so worried.”
“I don’t.” He gritted his teeth. “I don’t understand this stubborn streak of yours.”
“Hm, well, you’d better get used to it.” She kissed his cheek. “It’s not going anywhere.”
He laughed and pulled her close to him. “Tough as always. I guess you won’t miss me at all?”
She brushed her hand back through his hair and offered him a slow sultry kiss. “I will miss you every day until I come back to you.”
“You don’t have to lie.” He nipped at her bottom lip.
“I’m not lying.” She looked into his eyes and realized she wasn’t. The thought of leaving him behind was nearly heartbreaking, but as she pulled away from him, her need for him frightened her. “Bye.”
“Goodbye, Cassie.”
She felt his eyes on her as she walked to the plane. When the doors closed she knew he still stood out there watching.
The plane took flight and she did her best to look forward to the wedding, but a weight had settled on her shoulders. Something wasn’t quite right. She decided to distance herself from Lucas, just for the time she was away. She needed to find herself again, outside Lucas’s umbrella of protection.
Chapter 33
“Beer?” James set the bottle down on the lounge chair.
“Vodka?” Lucas looked up at him and squinted against the sunlight.
“Is it that bad?”
“Yes, I think it might be. I’m starting to wonder if she’s going to come back. She won’t take my calls.”
“Maybe she just wants to spend a little time in her old world.”
“A little too much time. What if she decides that’s where she belongs?”
James sat down on the chair next to him. “How could she pass all this up?”
“I found the one woman on earth who isn’t motivated by money, James.”
“No, but she is motivated by passion, and you are her passion.”
“I’d like to think that.” Lucas looked at the sky. “But I’m starting to wonder if I was just another fling to her.”
“It sounds to me that you might be overreacting.”
“Oh please, tell me how you really feel, James.”
“All I’m saying is that it’s hard for you to be happy. Now that you are, maybe you’re trying to create a problem where there isn’t one. She hasn’t said that she isn’t coming back, has she?”
“Why doesn’t she want to talk to me?”
“Cassie’s a strange one. You can’t expect her to be like every other woman you’ve known.”
“I guess.” Lucas sat forward and took a swig from the beer. “She’s it, James. She’s all I want. If she doesn’t come back, I’m done.”
“There are plenty of women out there, Lucas.”
“I don’t want any of them. Just her. I’ve made my effort. I took my risk. What happens next is entirely up to her.”
“As far as we know, she’ll be on her way back home by tomorrow afternoon. So there’s nothing to worry about.”
“Who says I’m worrying?” Lucas rais
ed an eyebrow. “It will be what it will be. I can’t do anything to change that.”
He stood up from the lounge chair and headed for the house. She would either come back or she wouldn’t, but the thought of her not returning was enough to make him wish that he’d insisted on accompanying her.
One of Natasha’s chief complaints about him had been his tendency to be jealous and overprotective. Over the years he’d worked on those issues and didn’t think he was nearly as bad as he once was. But the thought of Cassie on the other side of the country, doing whatever she was doing with whomever she was with, made his emotions go wild.
When the plane landed the next day, he was there waiting for her. He still hadn’t received a text or a call. His nerves were rattled by her silence, and though he looked forward to seeing her, he wanted an explanation as well.
The moment she stepped off the plane, all of his frustration left him. There she was, as beautiful as ever, walking back to him just as she’d promised.
“Lucas.” She smiled and opened her arms to him.
He hesitated. “I wasn’t sure you’d be here.”
“I was on your plane.” She laughed.
He caught her eyes and held them. “I don’t understand why you wouldn’t answer your phone.”
Her laughter faded and she lowered her eyes. “I got a little lost while I was out there, Lucas. I needed some time to think things through.”
“So you tortured me?”
She tilted her head away from him.
He captured her cheeks with the softness of his palms. “Cassie? Did you really come back to me?”
“Yes.” She finally met his eyes. He could see the pain that deepened her brown eyes. “I did. And I’m sorry I didn’t take your calls. That was wrong of me.”
“That’s all I need to know.” He kissed her, as swift and deep as he’d planned the entire drive to the airport.
She stumbled forward against him with the force of the kiss and returned it with equal passion.
When he finally eased his grasp on her he met her eyes. “I missed you.”
“I missed you too, Lucas.”
“Then don’t leave me again, hm?” He held her gaze. “Stay with me.”
“I’m here.” She smiled. “I have a lot of work left to do.”
“Yes, you do.” He caressed her cheek.
On the drive back to the mansion he held her close against him. She gazed out through the window. He wanted to ask her a million questions. He wanted to insist that she detail every activity she’d engaged in while she was gone, but he knew better. If Cassie had something she wanted to tell him, she would tell him. If he pushed her, she would only pull away.
As the mansion came into sight, she tilted her head to look up at him. “I’m glad to be back.”
“I’m glad too.” He kissed her forehead. His next words stuck in his throat. It wasn’t time yet. She wasn’t ready yet. He couldn’t rush things.
Chapter 34
Over the next few weeks Cassie finished the last few touches on the mural in the foyer. It turned out to be just as she’d imagined it, although seeing it in person again had added to the fullness of the imagery. On the day she considered it complete she sat down in the center of the foyer and stared at it.
When Lucas returned from his business meeting he paused in the foyer beside her and stared at it as well. He placed a hand on her shoulder and leaned close to whisper in her ear.
“It’s beautiful. Now my home is finally my home.”
“Yes.” Cassie forced a smile. But she didn’t feel so wonderful. She knew that with the completion of the mural, it was time for her to leave. She wasn’t sure how Lucas would respond to that. He’d made no mention of what he might expect from her once the mural was complete. “I’m glad you like it.” She stood up from the chair. “It took quite some time.”
“Yes, it did. But it’s perfect. Will you join me for dinner?”
“I think I’d better start packing.”
“Packing? Is there another wedding I don’t know about?”
“No.” She laughed. “But I’ll be heading back to the East Coast soon—now that the mural is done.”
“You’ll be what?” He took a step toward her. “Why would you do that?”
“Lucas, I don’t live here. I was just here to work, remember?”
“But things have changed between us. Haven’t they?”
“Yes, they have. And I hope that you would want to continue—building on what we have, I mean.”
“I just assumed you’d want to stay.” He frowned. “I thought we could transform one of the wings into a large studio for you. I’m sure many of my friends and associates will want your artwork once they see what you’ve done here. So why leave?”
“Lucas, I can’t just live here. I have to make it on my own. There’s no reason why we can’t carry on with a long-distance relationship. What’s wrong with that? You always have to leave for business trips. It’s no different.”
“How is it no different? You’re telling me that you would rather be on the other side of the country than here in my home with me?”
“Are you asking me to move in with you, Lucas? Because it sounds more like you’re telling me that I have to stay. Those are two different things.”
“This again.” He shook his head. “Fine. If you want to be stubborn, then be stubborn. Go ahead and go back to New York!”
As his voice rose, so did her heart rate. She’d never seen him so angry before. The more she saw the more it frightened it her.
“I think that’s best.” She stepped around him and headed for her room to pack her things. She expected that he might come after her, but he didn’t. She heard the loud slam of his study door.
Within a few hours she had her bags packed. She bought her own plane ticket, as she didn’t want to speak to him to ask about taking the jet. She’d thought that Lucas would respect her independence and understand her need for it. She never imagined that he would get so angry. Now she doubted that they were even on speaking terms.
She sent a text to James to ask him if she could use the car to go to the airport. He arrived at her door ten minutes later.
“Are you really leaving?” His eyes flashed.
“Yes. I’m leaving.” She gathered her bags, many more than she’d arrived with.
“How can you do this to him, Cassie?”
“I’m not doing anything. I never said I would stay once the murals were done. I wanted to continue our relationship. It’s not as if he can just put me on a shelf. I don’t belong to him.”
“Maybe he just wants to keep you close to him.”
“Maybe he doesn’t know what it’s like to have someone tell him no. He didn’t even ask me to move in, he just assumed that I would.”
“Take some time to think about this. Right now you’re both a little wound up.”
“No.” She looked into his eyes. “I knew from the beginning that I wasn’t cut out for this lifestyle. Lucas plays like a gentleman but underneath he wants compliance. I am not the type of person to just comply.”
“I don’t think that’s what he wants.”
“I don’t care. I’m leaving and that’s the end of it.”
“Cassie, don’t. If you go, you’re going to break him.”
“What about me? If I stay, what am I to him? Nothing more than an accessory? No.” She pushed past James and carried her bags down the stairs. “I’m leaving.”
Without another word she was out the door and in the car headed for the airport. It made sense to her. She couldn’t be trapped and pinned down for one man’s desire. Her freedom was worth more than any relationship. Lucas expected her to simply roll over and agree to their living together, which was ridiculous.
She climbed out of the car at the airport and walked inside. It wasn’t a very busy time of day for flights. She was still a few hours early, so she stopped in one of the shops to pick up a book to read. As she waited for the time to pass, her phone
began to ring. She assumed it would be Lucas, but she didn’t recognize the number.
“Hello?”
“Cassie? It’s Natasha.”
“Oh, Natasha. How are you?”
“Are you really going back to New York? Did something happen?”
“Did Lucas call you?”
“No, James did. He’s very concerned.”
“Look, Natasha, I’m not the type of woman to be kept by a man. I live my own life. Lucas can’t seem to understand that.”
“He will if you give him time.”
“Maybe I don’t want to give him time.”
“What’s really going on, Cassie?”
“When I went back to New York for my friend’s wedding, I realized how much I’d changed. I’d become dependent on Lucas. I didn’t like that feeling. Then there was the wedding. It’s something I never imagined for myself. It seemed so ritualistic, so strange. I thought about the future and realized I was letting it get out of my control. So I promised myself that when the mural was complete, I would go back to New York—get back on my feet. If Lucas wanted to be with me—if he truly did—then he would accept that.”
“He would accept the love of his life just disappearing on him?”
“I’m not disappearing.”
“To him you are. I wonder, Cassie, if the visit to New York and the wedding didn’t scare you in a different way. Maybe you discovered that you wanted to be with Lucas, and you wanted that strange wedding. There’s nothing wrong with that. You have a right to be happy. You don’t have to meet anyone’s standards of what you want.”
“I never really thought about it that way.” Cassie frowned. It did feel quite a bit like she was on the run. Had she really decided to go back to New York out of pride, or was it out of fear?
“Just think about it, please.”
“I will, Natasha. Thank you.” She hung up her phone and considered calling Lucas.
Just as she was about to press the button to make the call, she heard his voice.
“Cassie.” He sat down beside her.
She looked at him with surprise. “Lucas, what are you doing here?”
“I’m sorry for the way I spoke to you. I fight for what I want. I know that you think I’m trying to control you, but I’m not. I just want our relationship to have a chance. I’ll help you find a place here if that’s what you want. If you don’t want to live with me, that’s fine. But please, don’t go back to New York.”
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