He asked her who her favorite group was and she told him Bruce Springsteen. He said he was into Heavy Metal. Then he told her all his favorite foods and she told him hers, which gave her an idea. She said, “Want to come over for chocolate ice cream?” He said, “Yeah, I believe I do.” Then she had to run out to the store because there was hardly any chocolate ice cream left; she’d been eating it while they were on the phone.
She looked in the mirror. It seemed her lips were the same color as the rest of her face, so she put on some red lipstick. A little smeared. Lizzie used to be good at putting on lipstick, but she doesn’t wear it anymore; she doesn’t wear any makeup now. The doorbell rang just as Sherri was noticing the way her stomach strained against her dacron shirt. She grabbed her bathrobe and put it on over her clothes so she wouldn’t look too fat.
It was him. He said, “Hi, I’m Eduardo.”
They ate ice cream out of the carton and didn’t talk at all. It seemed to Sherri that they’d used up all their words already over the phone. Then Eduardo said, “Hey, you like cards?” Sherri said, “What kind of cards?” She was picturing Jake’s baseball cards. Eduardo said, “Card games, like Poker.” Sherri said, “Oh, those cards. I only know Rummy and Solitaire.” “Oh, man,” Eduardo replied. “You got to learn Poker.”
He removed a fresh deck from his jacket pocket and peeled off the plastic wrapper, dropping it on the floor. “You got money?” he asked. Sherri said, “I’m not allowed to spend money ’less I ask my sister first ’cept for groceries.” Then she told him all about how Lizzie was handling her affairs until Daddy got better and how Daddy had fallen in the tub and gotten a stroke and went to the hospital and then got another stroke and then went to the nursing home. Eduardo said, “You just need pennies.” Sherri jumped up. “Why didn’t you say so? I got a whole jar of them.” Eduardo said, “Get ’em.” When she had, Eduardo said, “Cash me in for a dollar.” Sherri said, “What?” “You know,” he answered, “count me out a hundred pennies and I’ll give you a buck.” They had fun after that.
At first Eduardo was two people; he was Eduardo looking at his hand and Eduardo looking at hers and explaining the rules. He bet even when she had better cards because he didn’t want to cheat. Then Sherri got good, and he didn’t have to look at her cards anymore. In the end, Sherri won 58 cents. He put the cards back in the box and she asked him if he wanted to go up to her room and listen to tapes. “Yeah,” he said. It was more an exhalation than a word.
While Bruce sang in the background, Sherri told Eduardo how she was afraid to go to sleep at night since Daddy went away. He said, “Want me to move in?” She studied the picture that appeared in her head. In it, Lizzie came over and saw Eduardo’s car in the driveway next to Daddy’s car that used to be hers. In the picture, Lizzie had to park in the street. Then she got mad and yelled at Sherri. When she was done, she yelled at Eduardo too. Then Eduardo went away. Sherri said, “No thanks.”
Eduardo said, “You want me to sleep over tonight?”
Sherri said, “Yeah.”
Eduardo took off all his clothes and got into her bed that used to be Daddy’s. Sherri took off her robe. Eduardo said, “Man, you’re a big mama, ain’t ya? I like big girls. More to hang onto.” Then Sherri took off the rest of her clothes too.
They did it good.
Eduardo said, “You tired?” Sherri wasn’t. “You want to play more Poker?” he asked.
They went downstairs and got the cards and pennies out all over again. Eduardo said, “We could get married; then I could move in.”
No one had ever wanted to marry Sherri before. She showed her three queens and two fives to her future husband. He said, “Full house. You win. Never mind. I can’t marry a woman who plays Poker as good as you. Ain’t lucky.”
When they tired of cards, they got on the sofa to watch TV. Sherri was on the inside and had to clamp an arm around Eduardo to keep him from falling off the edge. The movie was an old John Wayne one, the kind that Daddy likes. Sherri didn’t know what it was about because she was too busy thinking about marrying Eduardo. She was hoping he would ask her again when she wasn’t winning at cards. When the commercial came on, he said, “I got a job at the car-wash. Money’s not bad. I get tips too.”
Daddy just looks at her when she says, “Guess what, I got a boyfriend.” Katie says, “Poppie looks little today.” Lizzie says, “Poppie’s been scrimping on his meals, I think. He’s lost some weight. But he’s going to start eating better and put it back on, right Dad? Tell me about this boyfriend of yours, Sher.”
Sherri swings her eyes toward Daddy to inform Lizzie that she can’t say much about Eduardo in front of him. Daddy would be mad if he knew Eduardo was in her bed that used to be his. Lizzie would too, but she only yells; she doesn’t hit. Lizzie says, “What’s wrong with your eyes?” Sherri can see she didn’t get it. This time she swings her whole head. Then Lizzie gets it. “You already said you had a boyfriend,” she rails. Sherri replies, “Yeah, but, you know … the details.” Lizzie says, “For God’s sake, Sherri. You didn’t go and write that ad again, did you?” Sherri says, “Yeah, I did.” Lizzie says, “Well, I don’t want to hear about it.” Jake chirps, “I do.” Lizzie says, “You stay out of this.”
A nurse struts in, smiling. “How you doing today, Mr. Crum?” she asks. She bends over and pulls Daddy into a sitting position and gives him a big hug. When she releases him, she says to Lizzie, “Your father’s such a sweet man. He tries so hard. He’s the best fighter we’ve got.” Daddy cocks his head and looks up at the nurse with one brow raised. The nurse says, “I’m going to dress him now.”
Sherri hurries out so that she won’t see Daddy’s private parts. Katie, Jake, and Lizzie are right behind her. While they wait, they watch the old people out in the hall. One old man has visitors just like Daddy, a woman and five little kids. The woman is talking to him non-stop, but he isn’t listening; his eyes are on the kids. They are playing a game of tag around his wheelchair. His arm is extended, and every time one of them runs past him, he tries to grab at him or her. But his fingers are too slow and he can’t nab anyone. Sherri says to Lizzie, “That man looks like God.” Lizzie says, “What are you talking about?” Sherri answers, “That’s how God looks.” She isn’t afraid to talk about God so much in the daytime with lots of people around. Lizzie barks, “Because of his beard?” Sherri can tell she’s annoyed. “No,” she says, “’cause of how he’s trying to grab up people to get them to love him and sit on his lap.” Lizzie looks down at the floor. She murmurs, “I didn’t think Dad liked to be hugged.” Sherri shrugs. She doesn’t know whether he does or not. She says, “Want me to tell you about my boyfriend now?” Lizzie says, “Do you ever hug Dad like that?” Sherri says, “No, he don’t like it.” Lizzie says, “Funny, he didn’t seem to mind when she did.”
The nurse pushes Daddy out in his wheelchair and rubs his arm good-bye. Then she leans toward Lizzie and whispers, “You let him wheel himself a bit now. He needs the exercise.”
Daddy can wheel with only one arm, because the other one doesn’t work anymore. But he doesn’t go anywhere. He is too busy staring at the other people in wheelchairs across the hall. He seems to be particularly interested in the man who looks like God. Sherri says, “Daddy, you want to go see your friends?” Lizzie says, “Let’s find a quiet corner where we won’t be disturbed.” Then she gets behind the chair and starts rolling Daddy away to where the big windows are.
The view is nice. You can see all of Newark from this high up, the traffic, the stores, the people, everything. Sherri says, “Look, Katie. See the pretty pigeons.” Katie looks. She says, “Mom, there’s people in the street throwing bottles. Isabel says that’s not nice.” Lizzie retorts, “Tell Isabel not to look. And don’t you look either. We’re here to see Poppie. So, Dad, what have you been up to?”
Daddy shakes his head. He doesn’t know the answer. That happens to him sometimes. Jake takes out some bubble gum and gives a piece to Sherri and a pi
ece to Katie. Katie says, “What about Isabel?” Jake says, “Screw Isabel.” Sherri knows he would have said the F word if Lizzie wasn’t there. Katie says, “Isabel doesn’t want any anyway. It’s no good for her teeth.” Jake says, “Isabel doesn’t have teeth.” Katie squeals, “Mommy, tell Jake Isabel does so have teeth.” Lizzie says, “Knock it off, Jake.” Jake asks, “Where’s Isabel right now?” Katie thumbs to her immediate right. Jake makes a fist and wallops Isabel. “There,” he boasts, “now she doesn’t have teeth.” Katie punches Jake. Lizzie declares, “That’s it. I’ve had it. No ice cream on the way home today.” Katie pleads, “Please, Mom.” Jake says, “Don’t listen to her; she doesn’t mean it. Don’t you know that by now?” Daddy says, “Ellen.” Sherri bends over him and sings, “Mommy’s dead. Remember?” Lizzie cries, “What’s wrong with you? Don’t say that to him!” Sherri straightens up and replies, “But it’s true. He knows it’s true. He saw her with her rosaries in her hand where her knitting needles were supposed to be in the coffin that was too big for her.” Lizzie widens her eyes and makes that face that Sherri hates. She whispers harshly, “We’ll discuss this later.” She sounds like a hissing snake. Then, in one of her regular voices, the one she uses when she doesn’t want anyone to know she’s upset, she says, “Ellen’s not here today, Dad. I don’t know what’s wrong with you, Sherri.”
Sherri can’t take it. She has to get away fast. She feels herself paling. She needs a transfusion. She begins moving down the hall, past all the nurses, past the people in their wheelchairs, past the man who looks like God. She is moving so fast that she almost misses a man who wants a cigarette. She is so mad she almost doesn’t back up. She puts a cigarette into the V he has made with his fingers and reaches in her pocket to find him matches and starts moving again. She hears a nurse say, “Are you crazy? You can’t give him no matches. He’ll burn the place down!”
Sherri doesn’t like anyone saying “crazy” to her. She hates that word. Now she can’t remember if the nurse said it or if it was Lizzie or if it was both of them. She is seeing her feet slide through her tears. She hears her footsteps going faster and faster and thinks she may be running. It feels like she is running in water. She may be melting. She knows she is getting paler and paler. She knows she needs blood, a transfusion. She hears footsteps coming behind her and goes faster yet. Jake yells, “Wait up, Aunt Sher.”
She stops, her breath still coming fast. Jake says, “She’s sorry. Come back.” “She’ll yell at me again and make that face,” Sherri whines.
She realizes she is crying loudly. She didn’t notice that before. She was too busy looking at her feet. Jake says, “Don’t pay attention to her. She doesn’t know anything.” Sherri says, “She’s smart. She knows everything. She went to college.” Jake says, “If you guys have a fight, she won’t take us for ice cream.”
Sherri didn’t think of that before. “Okay,” she says, “I’ll come back.” She uses the bottom of her shirt to wipe away her tears. Jake whispers, “Aunt Sher, put your shirt down! You’re belly’s showing.” Sherri looks down, and sure enough, her belly is sticking out. When she starts to laugh, her flesh jumps accordingly. She points it out to Jake. Jake says, “Aunt Sher, please put your shirt down. Everybody’s looking.” Sherri drops her shirt. Jake adds, “And don’t worry about Mom. I’ll protect you from her.”
Sherri laughs again. Jake is so cute. She looks down to see if her belly is bouncing under her shirt. It is. As they turn back, she says, “What do you think of this place?” Jake’s face lights up. “Sucks,” he says. She laughs some more. She can hardly stop.
Lizzie is saying to Daddy, “Would you like us to bring you something next week?”
Daddy looks at her and doesn’t answer. “How about some magazines?” she continues. Daddy says, “Gold,” and rubs his useless arm with his good hand. “Gold?” asks Lizzie. “Is that the name of some magazine?” Jake says, “Poppie likes those ones with the naked women.” Daddy looks at Jake and laughs soundlessly. Then his laughing turns into crying and he covers it up with his good hand.
Daddy cries a lot since he’s been in the nursing home. He didn’t use to cry at all except for when he hit the car. He doesn’t make any sound when he cries. He just makes a long mouth and shakes his shoulders—like Lizzie, but violently, so that his whole upper body gets involved. When he finally removes his hand from his face, his eyes are wet and some spittle is seeping out of one corner of his mouth. Lizzie says, “There, there,” and pats his shoulder. Her features all cluster at the center of her face so that she looks like she might begin to cry too.
Daddy says, “Gold. Always gold.” Lizzie says, “Gold what? Try to tell us.” Daddy looks at his good hand. He makes a loose fist and strikes his leg. Then he looks up again. “Pold,” he says, “pole.” Sherri says, “Are you trying to say polar?” Daddy nods and looks at her anxiously. She turns to Lizzie. “What’s a polar?” Lizzie says, “Maybe he means Polaroid. A camera! I’ll bet he wants a shot of all of us to hang in his room. I’ll bring you one, Dad.” Jake says, “Poppie doesn’t care about snap shots. I think he wants to go to the North Pole. See, he’s trying to act it out by rubbing his hand up and down his arm. That’s charades for polar. Maybe it was his lifelong dream to go to the North Pole.” Katie says, “That’s where Santa lives.” Lizzie says, “Katie, I told you. There is no Santa. People give presents to one another at Christmas to show their love.” Katie squeals, “Daddy says there’s a Santa!” Lizzie rolls her eyes and whispers, “Figures. He won’t accept Isabel, but he insists on Santa.” Sherri can’t tell whether she is talking to her or to herself.
Daddy cries, “Polar!” His mouth is stretching again and his bottom lip is quivering. Lizzie says, “Maybe we could bring you some books on the North Pole. Would you like that?” Daddy nods, but he still seems upset. Lizzie looks anxiously to the others for help. Katie volunteers, “Isabel and me are gonna draw Poppie some pictures of the North Pole for next time. Snow and stars and reindeers and Santa. That’s all that’s up there.” Lizzie exclaims, “Did you hear that, Dad? Katie and her friend are going to make you some pictures to hang in your room!” Daddy looks at Jake. Jake says, “Hey, don’t look at me, Poppie. I don’t like to draw.” Lizzie shoves Katie forward. She says, “Dad, Katie’s going to draw you pictures. Jake will bring you something else.” Sherri says, “Jake, you got any G.I. Joes in your pocket?” Jake says, “I got two. Why?” Sherri says, “See if Poppie likes them.” Lizzie says, “Don’t be ridiculous, Sher. What would he want with a G.I. Joe?” Daddy says, “Joe?” Jake says, “Not your friend Joe. G.I. Joes. Toys.” He removes one from his pocket. Daddy’s good hand comes up slowly to get it. He rolls it in his fingers and studies it intently. He begins to smile, but then his lips extend past the point of a smile and he spreads his hand over his face with the G.I. Joe still between his fingers.
He lowers his head and cries into his palm, his whole body jerking. Jake says, “Get it back, Ma. He’s getting it all wet.” Katie says, “Okay, Poppie, you got to give it back to Jake now.” Daddy’s hand comes down, but he doesn’t give it back. He is holding it tighter. Jake insists, “Mom, get it back. That’s Snake-Eyes, my favorite guy.” Lizzie scolds, “Jake, don’t be so selfish. You’ve got a hundred more at home.” Her hand hovers over Daddy’s shoulder, but when she sees that Daddy is in control again, it retreats. Jake says, “I do not. I’ve only got 58.” Sherri exclaims, “Fifty-eight! That’s how much I won from playing Poker with Eduardo the first time!” Lizzie cries, “What!” Sherri says, “Eduardo, my new boyfriend, what I been trying to tell you about!” Lizzie says, “You played Poker with your grocery money with a man you found in the Record?” Sherri says, “It was just pennies.” Lizzie says, “You won 58 pennies?” Sherri nods. Lizzie says, “Oh.” Jake says, “Don’t be so selfish, Ma.” Lizzie, who looks confused, says, “What are you taking about? If anyone’s selfish here, it’s you.” Sherri says, “He’s not selfish. Daddy took his best guy, that’s all.” Liz
zie snaps, “How would you know?”
Sherri doesn’t answer. She doesn’t want to have to go away again. She can feel herself paling, but she pretends it isn’t happening. Jake puts his hand out to Daddy, but Daddy doesn’t even look at it. He is still studying the G.I. Joe. Lizzie says, “Let Poppie have the doll.” Jake says, “It’s not a doll.” Katie says, “Isabel says boys don’t play with dolls.” Lizzie replies, “You tell Isabel there’s nothing wrong with boys playing with dolls. If more boys played with them, maybe they’d grow up to be a little more sensitive. Maybe there wouldn’t be so many wars, so many—”
“Don’t say that in front of Poppie. He likes wars,” Jake interrupts. Katie quips, “Daddy’s sensitive and he doesn’t play with dolls.” Lizzie snorts. She mumbles, “I think you’ve got it backwards.” Jake says, “What makes you think Dad’s sensitive?” Katie says, “’Cause he told me so.” Jake rolls his eyes. “Figures,” he says.” He looks just like Lizzie for an instant. “Okay, Poppie can have it,” he concedes. Daddy says, “Polar gold.”
They all stare down at him. Jake says, “He means polar bear. Do you mean polar bear, Poppie?” Daddy nods and smiles.
On the way home, Sherri starts to tell everyone about Eduardo, but Lizzie interrupts. She says, “Did you sleep with him?” Sherri says, “Sure.” Lizzie shakes her head. She says, “I don’t believe you. I don’t know what’s wrong with you.”
Sherri twists to have a look at the back seat. Katie and Jake and Brigit’s car seat are all back there. There’s no room for her. Lizzie says, “I hope you’re using contraceptives at least.” Sherri says, “Contra who?” Lizzie says, “Protection.” Sherri says, “I got an IUD.” Lizzie looks at her sharply. “When did you get that?” she snaps. “A long time ago,” Sherri responds. Katie asks, “What’s an IUD?” Lizzie says, “Never mind,” through her teeth. Jake snickers.
Homebodies Page 9