‘Oh, you mustn’t worry, darling. I promise to be good.’ She sent him a knowing wink. ‘Or would you like another excuse for a road trip with Bella?’
Damon hastily switched his gaze to the distant horizon, but he couldn’t avoid a hollow feeling of emptiness at the mention of Bella’s name. ‘I wouldn’t inflict another trip like that on her.’
‘Damon, she enjoyed it as much as you did.’
‘How would you know?’
‘I’ve known you both for a very long time. Besides, I still have my eyesight, my dear.’
He scowled at her. ‘And what do you think you saw?’
‘Two people very much in love.’
Dismayed, Damon stared at his grandmother. ‘Now you’re getting carried away.’
Violet shook her head. ‘I’m not being fanciful, although I will admit I’m poking my bib in where it’s probably not wanted. But someone needs to wake you up. If I had enough strength I’d seriously consider shaking some sense into you.’
‘Why? What have I done that’s so wrong?’
‘You’re planning to run away. Again.’
‘Excuse me? I’m running away? Have you forgotten why we’re here?’
‘You know what I’m talking about. You’re running away from Bella. And that’s ridiculous, because you’re thoroughly miserable. I’m sure Bella’s quite wretched, too. Poor girl.’
Damon’s breath came in painful gasps. He was reliving the farewell at the airport, watching Bella disappear without a backward glance. He’d never felt so suddenly, painfully empty, as if he’d been drained of something vital, like his blood.
‘Darling,’ Violet said gently. ‘You have so much to offer a young woman.’
‘Now that’s where you’re wrong. A girl with any sense would not want to tie herself to someone who deals with danger on a daily basis.’
‘Oh, for heaven’s sake. Do you really think a little danger would worry Bella?’
With a growl of frustration, Damon jumped to his feet, dragged in great gulps of sharp, salty air. But almost immediately he felt foolish, and when he turned back to his grandmother she looked so diminutive and helpless alone on the sand that he quickly dropped down beside her again and let out a heavy sigh.
He knew what she’d said was true. Bella had never been a girl to be frightened of a little daring and danger. If he didn’t already know it, she’d told him as much several times.
After what felt like an age, he said, ‘Do you want to know the truth?’
‘If you’re ready to tell me.’
‘If I’m ready?’ He stared at her. Stared at the dearly loved, wrinkled face and the bright, dark, knowing eyes he knew so well. ‘Are you implying that you already know what I’m going to tell you?’
‘You said it was the truth.’
‘Well, yes. That’s right.’
‘The truth that lies in your heart?’
His heart thudded heavily. ‘Yes.’
Violet’s smile was warm. ‘I’ve been waiting to hear this for a very long time.’
‘You think I love Bella?’
His grandmother nodded slowly. ‘I know you do, Damon.’
He felt despair rising through him like a tide, squeezing the air from his lungs. ‘If that’s true, why can’t I tell her?’
‘Because you’re prepared to take risks with your body on a daily basis, but you won’t take a risk with your heart.’
‘Why?’
It felt like the most important question he’d ever asked, and it was some time before Violet answered.
Eventually, she said, ‘I suspect you’re worried you’ll end up abandoned like your father.’
It was true. Of course. It was suddenly blindingly true. On some level he must have always known this, but he’d never allowed his thoughts to linger on this truth. He’d always snatched them away, as if they could burn him.
‘Damon, you know it’s hogwash.’ Violet’s wrinkled hand gripped his arm. ‘You’re nothing like your father. You never have been and you never will be.’
He let out the breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding. ‘Thanks,’ he said quietly. ‘I think I needed to hear that from you.’
Ahead of him the blue-green sea swelled and splashed in white-capped peaks. Streaks of pink, a reflection of the sunset behind them, were spreading across the sky. The world looked suddenly, wonderfully brighter.
Bella checked her appearance in the mirror one last time. Her hair was pulled back into a tidy bun, her make-up was flattering, but subdued. Her outfit was a grey pencil skirt with a matching grey-and-white striped blouse, modestly buttoned high. She was pleased with the result. She looked suitably conservative from top to toe. Even her fingernails were an unadventurous pale pink.
So … she was ready for her job interview and, if she was really lucky, by the time she arrived home this afternoon she would be once again employed.
It had been a stroke of good fortune discovering the online advertisement for a ‘motivated personal assistant.’ The job was right up her alley, and she’d been able to email a cover letter and résumé mere moments before the applications closed.
More importantly, the mad dash to get her documentation in order had helped to distract her from the pain of her heart breaking into a thousand bleeding pieces—a condition she’d endured from the moment she’d stepped onto the plane in Cairns.
Regret was such a useless emotion. Bella knew that, but she’d been swamped by an ocean of remorse. She was so mad with herself for walking away without admitting that she loved Damon, that she didn’t care how dangerous his work was, or how remote, she wanted and needed and longed to be with him.
He might not have been pleased to hear this news. Then again, if she’d explained that she didn’t expect him to come back to a safe office job in Australia, he might have been secretly delighted.
Now she would never know.
She’d walked away from the only man she’d ever loved, and now she was suffering the awful consequences.
To distract herself, she’d dived straight into hunting for work, and this morning she’d actually been able to stop thinking about Damon for at least ten minutes. Once she started work, she hoped to stretch those Damon-free minutes into hours, and eventually into days and weeks.
Getting this job was important. Her sanity saver. But she’d spent too long getting ready. She was running out of time and in danger of missing her bus …
All she needed was to find her grey handbag and her bus ticket … and her references …
Bella had just found the last of these items when her front doorbell rang. Panic. She had no idea who the caller could be. Her friends were all at work.
A hasty glance down the hallway to the frosted-glass panel in her front door revealed a tall, dark, masculine outline. No. The last thing she wanted now was to be delayed by a talkative, foot-in-the-door salesman.
She was hopeless with salespeople. She found it almost impossible to shut the door in their faces. It seemed too rude. So she always found herself listening to their spiel and then taking an age to get rid of them.
If she was held up now, she’d miss her bus and be late for her interview.
She decided to sneak out the back way. It was a bit of a nuisance, ducking lines of washing and children’s tricycles, but with luck the fellow would be gone by the time she got round to the front of her block of flats.
Damon pressed the front door bell again, and his stomach tied itself into a dozen knots as its ringing reverberated through Bella’s flat.
It was clear she wasn’t home, and, of course, he’d known it wasn’t wise to race down to Brisbane without phoning ahead. But he’d been impatient. And, yeah, afraid that Bella would simply tell him to get lost without giving him a chance to explain.
This morning, after a final quick check to make sure that Paddy and Violet were happily resettled in Greenacres, he’d headed straight down the Toowoomba Range to the city, with a heart full of hope, planning to catch Bella
before she went out.
Obviously, he was too late.
He made his way back down the steps feeling more depressed than he would have believed. On the footpath, he stood, staring at Bella’s letterbox, debating whether it was worth leaving a note.
But too much depended on getting this meeting right. Everything depended on getting it right. And Damon wanted to be face to face with Bella when he told her all that he needed to say.
Disappointed, he turned back to his car. Two doors away a bus was pulling into a stop and a slim blonde girl in a grey skirt and high heels climbed into it.
A gong struck inside Damon. Surely that girl was Bella? How could he have missed seeing her?
He began to run, and as the bus pulled away from the kerb he saw Bella sitting in a window seat, staring straight ahead. He waved madly.
‘Bella,’ he shouted, waving both arms above his head, trying to catch her eye.
The bus accelerated, zipping her away down the street. Out of sight.
Again.
Bella arrived at the job interview with only minutes to spare, but at least she had a chance to catch her breath and to compose herself. She dredged up a smile as she introduced herself at the front desk and was shown to a room where two other girls sat on chairs lined up against the wall.
They eyed her warily when she walked in.
She smiled. ‘Hi.’
They returned her smile half-heartedly.
Bella took a seat, drew a deep breath and tried to feel calm and serene. And confident. Confidence went a long way in a job interview.
She tried a little visualisation technique she’d learned during one of the many vocational training days she’d attended. She imagined being told she had won this job, pictured shaking her new boss’s hand. Heard him ask, ‘Can you start next Monday?’
‘Sure,’ she’d say. ‘That would be wonderful.’
Except … it wouldn’t be wonderful.
She’d be telling a lie.
How could starting a new job be wonderful when all she really wanted was to be with Damon?
She closed her eyes and drew a shuddering breath.
‘I’m nervous, too,’ the girl next to her whispered.
Bella’s eyes flashed open. ‘I’m not really nervous,’ she said. ‘Not about the job.’
‘You’re lucky. I probably shouldn’t care so much, but it’s my dream to get a job like this.’
‘Well, yes. It does sound good.’ Somewhat guiltily, Bella eyed the earnest expression on the other girl’s face.
Just then, a door opened and another applicant came out. She flashed them an eyebrow-raised smile of relief.
‘Miranda Hoey,’ boomed a masculine voice and the girl near the door jumped to her feet and smoothed down her skirt.
As Bella watched the door close behind her she felt cold all over, and her stomach churned uncomfortably. The air in the room seemed to solidify. She couldn’t breathe.
‘Excuse me,’ she whispered to her neighbour and she lurched to her feet.
At the front desk, she said, ‘I’m sorry. I’ve changed my mind. I’d like to withdraw my application.’
Outside on the city street, she drew in several deep breaths and felt marginally better.
‘I have no idea why I did that,’ she said to no one in particular. But she smiled. And for no reason that made any sense, she felt marvellously free.
It was late afternoon by the time Bella got back to her flat. She’d splurged on lunch in the city at a favourite café, and she’d gone clothes shopping. Lingerie shopping to be precise, which was rather reckless given that she didn’t have a job and she was still paying off a wedding dress that she would never wear.
She’d been thinking about Damon far too often as she’d shopped. She’d wondered if he’d already left for Hong Kong, and she’d even played with the ridiculous fantasy of jumping on a plane and following him—just to see how he’d react.
Okay, so she’d told him she didn’t want to continue their relationship. But might things be different if she told him her true feelings? What did she have to lose? She couldn’t be any more miserable than she was now.
She was rather tired by the time she climbed from the bus, lugging her shopping, including a ready-made chicken satay that she would heat in the microwave and eat in front of the telly.
She didn’t see the man getting out of the car in front of her flat until he almost blocked her path.
She got such a shock, her shopping bags slipped from her suddenly nerveless fingers. ‘Damon!’
Damon, looking all kinds of wonderful. Damon, stooping to gather up the packet of chicken satay and the silk and lace undies.
What was he doing here? She’d told him to stay away. She should be angry.
‘I—I wasn’t expecting you,’ she spluttered.
‘I’ve been waiting here since this morning.’
‘This morning?’ Bella tried to swallow a sudden lump in her throat. ‘Why?’
Cautiously, he said, ‘I needed to see you, but you were too busy hopping on to a bus and getting away. I hoped you wouldn’t be gone too long.’
Her jaw dropped. Her heart was performing somersaults at the very thought of impatient, restless Damon waiting here. All day.
She shook her head in stunned disbelief. ‘I thought you were a salesman. I only saw a shadow through the front door and I was in a hurry. I didn’t want to be late. I’m sorry, Damon. I can’t believe you’ve been waiting all this time.’
They were standing on the footpath in full view of her neighbours. ‘You’d better come inside,’ she said.
Damon smiled. ‘I thought you’d never ask.’
An entire flock of butterflies danced in Bella’s stomach as he followed her up her front stairs, carrying her shopping. She wasn’t sure if she should be happy and excited, or scared and angry.
‘I think I left the place in a bit of a mess,’ she said as she pushed the door open. ‘I was rushing around this morning getting ready for a job interview. The kitchen’s through here.’
She led the way to the tiny kitchen at the back of her flat. ‘I’ll need to get that chicken in the fridge.’ She had no idea why she was babbling about kitchens and chickens. She supposed it was nerves.
‘Would you like some coffee?’ she called over her shoulder. ‘You must be parched.’
‘I’ve had three cups of takeaway coffee.’
‘Oh. I guess you don’t need any more caffeine, then.’
‘You said you’ve been for a job interview?’
Turning, Bella saw surprising bleak shadows in Damon’s eyes. Her heart became a bird dashing its wings against the cage of her chest.
He was pale and frowning as he set the shopping bags on the kitchen table. ‘Did you get the job?’
Bella hesitated. When she’d walked away from the interview this morning, this man had been at the forefront of her mind. But if she admitted how she felt about him now, she would feel so vulnerable.
She still didn’t know why he was here. Why had he waited for her? Why should he care if she’d applied for a new job?
It was clear, however, as Damon stood to attention, waiting for her answer, that he did care.
‘I changed my mind,’ she said quietly. ‘I pulled out of the interview.’ ‘Why?’
‘I wasn’t absolutely sure it was what I wanted. If I’d been offered the position, I might have felt … trapped.’
She watched the slow roll of his broad shoulders as he relaxed, saw the almost imperceptible dawning of a smile.
Afternoon sunlight streamed softly through the only window in the room highlighting the rumpled sheen of his hair and the jut of his cheekbones. She thought he’d never looked more masculine and handsome than he did right now.
Bravely, she said, ‘Now it’s your turn, Damon. You need to explain what you’re doing here when we agreed it’s all over between us.’ She felt as if she were poised at the top of a very high peak, and she knew, instinctively, that Damon was ab
out to lift her to the heights of happiness, or tip her into the pits of despair.
‘I have a confession to make,’ he said.
Bella drew a deep, very necessary breath.
Damon looked tense, too. Gripping the back of a kitchen chair with both hands, he said, ‘I’m here to tell you something I’ve been too scared to admit.’
‘What’s that?’
‘I love you.’ His eyes took on a bright silver sheen and his throat rippled as he gripped the chair harder. ‘I’ve never told you before, Bella, because I couldn’t risk having you turn me down. But now I know I no longer have a choice. I love you so much. I need you so much, and I know I’m a bad risk—but I—’
She didn’t give him a chance to continue. With a whoop of delight she dived across the room and was in his arms.
‘You’re an idiot,’ she told him as she kissed him. ‘I know.’
‘But I’m an idiot, too. I was trying to tell you in Cairns that I love you. That I’ve never stopped loving you, and you’ve totally ruined me for anyone else. But I was scared, too.’
‘Oh, Bella.’ His arms tightened around her.
‘I was scared because I always knew you needed to stay free.’
‘We have to talk about that.’
‘But it doesn’t matter now. Not if we both love each other. We’ll work something out.’
With a soft groan, he pulled her in and kissed her with everything that lay in his heart.
Later, they talked. On the sofa in the front room. With Bella nestled between his legs and the lights turned low. Damon knew he’d never felt more contented.
‘About my job,’ he said.
Bella rubbed her cheek against his jaw. ‘Please don’t start making sacrifices. I don’t expect you to come home and settle down. I don’t think I’d enjoy having the wanderer captive at last.’
‘Would you be prepared to live somewhere abroad, then, like—say—Hong Kong?’
‘Damon, I’d love it.’
He chuckled. ‘You always were an adventurer. But I’d still be away for weeks at a time.’
‘That’s okay. I’ll cope. I’d quite enjoy exploring Hong Kong on my own.’
‘What about your father? Will he be all right without you?’
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