by Ava Walsh
Claire shook her head, cutting the doctor off. "Can you just give me a minute? It’s a lot to take in."
Bulla nodded and stepped out of the room again. Claire pressed her hands to her eyes. She had to approach this logically. She couldn't afford to become emotional. How would a baby affect her life, her job? And there was Roland to consider. He had been trying to have a child, and it had always ended in miscarriage–which was likely how this pregnancy would end as well.
And there was the possibility that Melissa had been killed because of her relationship with Roland. If that was the case, would there be a target painted on Claire's back as well? Well, that was a risk that could be minimized.
Pregnancies were dangerous. Given that this wasn't a normal pregnancy, it carried more risk. If she was going to terminate, she had to do it right away. But was that what she wanted? No, she didn’t think it was. There was no reason she couldn’t have a baby, either. She had a steady job and good salary. She could take care of a child. Especially since the father was a billionaire. If she kept the baby, things would work out.
With a sigh, she pulled out her phone and dialed Roland. He answered quickly, as though he had been waiting for her to call.
"If I decide I don't want to risk this pregnancy, what will you do?" she asked, without even a hello.
There was a moment of silence on the other side, and Roland sighed. "I will understand. It's a lot for you to come to terms with."
"But will you find another woman to try to have a baby with? You need your Alpha heir."
"I… I don't know." Roland's voice lowered. "I'm not sure how much more I can take. But if you don't want to have my children, yes. I'll look somewhere else. You don't have to feel pressured."
Jealousy swirled in Claire's heart. It surprised her how much she hated the idea of Roland sleeping with other women. It wasn't like she had any hold on him!
"I have proven myself capable of getting women pregnant, Claire. It's not..." Another sigh. "I want you to have my child. If you don't want to be responsible for a baby right now, we can work something out. I'll take full custody, you don't have to be part of our lives." Every word sounded like it was costing Roland something.
Claire lay down on the bed again, staring up at the ceiling. She could hear how much Roland wanted this baby–wanted the baby, and wanted her. "What if I want to keep it? Custody and all?"
"We can figure that out."
Claire knew what she was going to do. "I didn't want to have a baby this soon. And I wanted to be in a stable relationship first. But even though I'm scared shitless, I'm going to do it. I'm going to carry the baby to term." Unless the full moon killed it. Claire let out a shuddering breath. "Can I come over tonight?"
"Of course."
"I'll see you at 6:00, then." Claire hung up, pressing her hands to her soft stomach. Whether she was ready or not, this was happening.
Chapter Seven
Roland paced on the guest house patio, waiting for Claire to arrive. It was still fifteen minutes before she was supposed to get there, but he was feeling oddly nervous. Knowing that Claire was going to attempt to carry until term was a relief. More than a relief. He had never felt happier than he felt knowing that his child was growing inside her. But she didn't have the same feelings for him as he had for her. He knew she was meant to be his mate. To her, he was just some person who got her pregnant after the woman he had been sleeping with was murdered.
How could he ever convince her to stay with him? He didn't want to press too hard.
He growled when he saw a van pull up. Brian was in the front seat, and he could see the rest of his pack inside. They all got out, approaching him cautiously. He really didn't want to deal with them right now, but he was their Alpha, and they deserved to know what was happening. They stopped just in front of the steps.
"Adam told us that she's coming," Brian said.
"Going to try to kill her again?" Roland snarled. Brian ducked his head. Roland knew that he was being unfair, that Brian hadn't been in control when he attacked Claire. His anger was just too strong to push back, though. "Next time don't think I'll hold back after you surrender."
Brian stared at the ground. His hands were clenched. Roland ignored him, though, because at that moment Claire pulled up. Given that her car was currently behind his house looking like it had been stomped on by a giant, this one must be a rental.
She eyed the pack wearily as she approached, but Roland smiled to see that she didn't let them break her stride. Her chocolate-colored eyes met his as she ascended the steps.
"I want to talk to you alone," she said. "That means no audience."
Roland nodded. He gestured for the guesthouse, but at that moment, Brian climbed the steps. Claire jumped at his closeness and Roland had to repress a snarl. As it was, he pushed Claire back and stood before Brian, glaring at him until the other werewolf backed down.
"I only wanted to apologize," Brian muttered, looking at the ground.
"You're the one who attacked me?" Claire stepped up beside Roland and viewed Brian with a furrowed brow.
"To be fair, we all did," Brian replied. He grinned up at her.
Roland growled again and the smile disappeared.
"I led the charge, and for that I'm sorry." Brian bowed his head.
Claire cocked her head to one side, her gaze sweeping over him and the rest of the pack. There was the detective’s gleam in her eye that she got whenever she was looking for evidence. She didn't still think that one of his pack members had killed Melissa, did she? They couldn't have.
If one of them had, it meant that he had failed her twice over.
"Thank you for your apology," Claire said, nodding her head at Brian.
"We are all very pleased that you decided to keep the baby," the werewolf continued.
Claire's eyes widened.
"Who told you that?" Roland snarled. He advanced on the other werewolf, hands clenched into fists. Brian backed away quickly. He all but dropped to his knees before his Alpha.
"Adam did. He said she had come to terms with our… curse and had agreed to give birth to the child. Was he wrong?"
Roland forced himself to relax a little. Adam was his best and oldest friend. He had confided in him about his conversation with Claire, but hadn't meant for him to tell the pack just yet. He cast a sympathetic look at Claire before he nodded.
"That is the truth. Claire has decided that she will attempt to carry to term, but what role we each will play in the baby's life has not been decided."
Claire put a hand on his arm. "Roland—"
"Aren't you going to turn her into a werewolf as well?"
Roland tore away from Claire. Even if he retained control of himself during the full moon, if he tasted blood it would be all too easy to lose control. A roar ripped through his chest as his fist collided with Brian's face. He would never put her in that sort of danger! She was too precious to even consider turning her.
"Stop that!" It was only Claire's voice that brought him back to his senses. She had a hand on her gun and the other stretched out towards them, eyes sharp. "Roland, back away."
The wolf in him snarled at taking orders, even from his mate, but Roland gulped in a deep breath and stepped back.
Brian got to his feet. "I overstepped. I apologize."
Claire stepped forward. The hand on her gun relaxed. "I'm not becoming a werewolf. And I didn't want to say this, but… but it's why I'm here. Roland, I know I said I was going to try to carry the baby, but I can't. The risks are just too high."
All the air seemed to be sucked out of Roland's vicinity. His heart stopped beating as he stared up at his mate–she had decided to terminate? Part of him wanted to rage, to tell her she couldn't, to pull out his impressive checkbook and promise her whatever she wanted to keep the baby. The rest of him felt numb. There would be other women. There would be other pregnancies.
But what Claire was saying right now meant that she would never accept being his mate.
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br /> There would be other women. But none of them would be Claire. None of them would be his mate.
"Please come inside," she said, her voice soft. "Please. We need to talk."
Somehow his legs moved on their own, following her into the guesthouse. He would accept her decision. He would support her. As soon as the door shut behind him, Claire marched to the window. He didn't know what she was looking at, but she nodded as though satisfied and turned back to him.
"I lied. I still plan to keep the baby."
Roland blinked. He sucked in a deep breath of air, but didn't know what to say and so released it again. His knees wobbled and he sank onto the couch. "You're not going to terminate?"
"No. But we think that Melissa may have been murdered because she was trying to get pregnant. I think one of your pack members wants your position and killed Melissa, either because she found out that he was drugging her, or because he wanted to impregnate her, and she wasn't having any of it."
"No." Roland shook his head emphatically. "It's not one of my pack. They know that without me they'd turn into mindless killing machines. None of them want that."
"I'm just going where the evidence takes me. There is no other obvious motive."
Roland closed his eyes, guilt flashing through him. "If any of them were trying to overthrow me, I'd know about it. Brian is the only one that pushes back against me, and he would never have hurt Melissa. Never."
"The one who attacked me," Claire muttered. "How can you be so sure he wouldn't have hurt Melissa?"
Roland didn't have an answer. Was this all his fault? Was Melissa dead because he wasn't strong enough to keep his wolves in their place? He hung his head, hiding his face in his hands. His father would have known how to deal with this sort of thing.
Claire put a hand on his shoulder. "It's not your fault."
"I should know if it was one of my pack."
"Look, I can't pretend to know how your wolfie ways work, but I know people. You can't know everything about everybody. You want to trust your pack. You guys share this incredibly dangerous secret, a secret that could get you all killed. You have to trust them with your life every single second. Of course you don't want to suspect them of betraying you. If you do… then your whole world is wrong."
Roland glanced up at her. What she said made so much sense. But it didn't ease his guilt. "It's my job to protect them. Melissa's death is my fault. And if it was one of my pack, how can I call myself their Alpha?"
"By making sure that he doesn't hurt anybody else."
Gratitude welled in him. He wanted so badly to kiss her that he was on his feet with his arms around her before he could stop it. The slight jerk of her body made him realize what he was doing, though, and he let her go at once.
Claire stared at him, her eyes wide. A pink stain rose up her neck. "This reminds me… what are we now?"
Roland's brow furrowed. "What do you mean?"
"Well, I'm pregnant with your child. We're going to have a baby together. So, you and me. What are we? Are we a couple, or are we going to be those parents who are friendly towards each other because they've never had their hearts broken by one another? Is the kid going to be shuffled between us like a hockey puck, or will we live together?"
You're my mate. Roland swallowed the words back. How could he answer this without scaring her off? "Claire, I am… very drawn to you."
"The whole genetic mating thing?"
Roland flinched.
"I remember what you said about that. And how you looked at me when you said it." She twisted her hands and bit her lower lip. "I won't deny that I'm drawn to you as well. When I'm in your arms, it feels right. And right now I want nothing more than for you to kiss me. I shouldn't, I should be freaking out, but I want you to carry me to bed."
Roland's head jerked up. "Really?"
"Really. But I don't like the idea of us getting together because our genes say so."
"Then we don't," Roland said slowly. He didn't miss the look of devastation in Claire's eyes and smiled gently at her. "We give it a trial run, and if we actually like each other, then we get together because we want to. Not because of pregnancy or genes."
There was no doubt in his mind that they would get along perfectly. He just needed time to convince Claire of that. Her brow furrowed and she looked at him for a long moment, the detective light in her eyes. She was probably going over various scenarios and examining the evidence of what they were.
Eventually, she nodded. "That sounds acceptable. We'll get to know each other first."
Roland couldn't help beaming. "Good. We'll go to dinner tonight, then… unless it's inappropriate to go to dinner while the investigation is going?"
Claire laughed and patted her stomach. "That ship has long set sail. Dinner it is."
Chapter Eight
Claire ran her fingers through her curls, making sure they were all in place, before she slipped naked into Roland's bed. The past few weeks had been hard, mostly because they hadn't been able to see each other in person. Phone calls, Skype and texts only went so far. But they had to be sneaky if they were going to keep her continued pregnancy a secret.
Tonight was the night before the full moon, though, and both were afraid that the little fluttering movements Claire was just beginning to feel were going to end the very next night. They needed to be together, and Claire hadn't found any evidence that implicated any of the pack, so they agreed it was safe to be.
"Do you want some water to something?" Roland called from the kitchen.
"Water's good," Claire replied, unsnapping her bra. Her breasts were slightly swollen and very sensitive. She couldn't wait for Roland's big, strong hands to be on them. She almost moaned at the thought alone.
She could hear Roland bustling around in the kitchen and smiled. The more she learned about him, the fonder she grew of him. He spoke ten different languages, headed three charitable organizations, and he did all his cooking himself. He was worth billions, yet he scrambled his own eggs. He said it helped him to stay grounded.
He had opened up to her more quickly than she had expected. Not only that, but she found herself opening up to him as well.
She told him about what a hell high school was. He told her about his parents. She admitted that she had once had a tattoo on her lower back that an old boyfriend had convinced her to get, but that she always hated it and had it removed the moment he dumped her for a thinner, younger model. She even told him about the first time she had shot and killed somebody. The man had a gun pointed at the head of a five-year-old, but it still haunted her.
Roland was easier to talk to than anybody she had ever known. Every time they were together, she wanted to be with him for the rest of her life. Which was why, tonight of all nights, on the verge of everything changing, she just wanted to be with him and not worry about anything. Who knew what changes the full moon would bring to their lives?
When he entered the bedroom, his eyes trailed down her blanketed body. "I was hoping you'd be on top of the covers."
Claire felt the heat rising up her neck into her cheeks. "I'm feeling fat today."
"You're pregnant, not fat."
Both of them knew that being pregnant caused only a small part of her round stomach. In fact, given her build, nobody would even suspect that she was pregnant yet. She just looked like she had just been snacking on cupcakes a little too much lately. She sighed as Roland set two bottles of water down on the nightstand and sat on the bed.
"You're beautiful," he said. "From the moment I saw you, I said—"
"I heard what Adam said. My legs were like sausages."
Roland frowned. "Adam can kick himself in the head. You're beautiful, and for what it's worth, I love your legs. They're just perfect for gripping as you wrap them around my waist."
More heat, though this time it was centered lower, rather than on her face. Roland, apparently tired of talking, rolled over her, pinning her under the blankets, and pressed his mouth to hers. She hummed
as their skin heated together. Roland wasted no time, tugging the blanket away and feasting at her breasts. His mouth on her skin made her heat and tighten. Claire threw back her head, moaning, tangling her hands in his hair.
"You're beautiful, do you understand?" Roland growled into her skin.
Claire ran her hands down his tight muscles, reveling in the thrill of sparks their bodies produced. She kicked one leg free and slung it over his hips as he moved back to her mouth.
"Do you understand?"
"Yes," she gasped, willing to say or do anything to make sure he never stopped. "Don't stop. Don't let me go."
"Never."
He drew back slightly, letting her reach down and find him with her hand. His eyes slid shut as he bucked his hips forward. His mouth captured hers. Tongues tangled. Claire could almost read his thoughts. More than anything, she knew this was right. This was more than right, this was perfection made manifest and she could never deny that… She wasn't ready to say she loved Roland, but she knew she could never live without him again.
When he entered her it was like heaven. Claire threw her head back, crying out as shockwaves of pleasure coursed through her. She knew from experience that it would only get better from here. She was already panting, already bucking her hips up, impatient for his strength to fill her.
"I'm never letting you go," Roland moaned in her ear. "Never."
"Never," she agreed, kissing him again as he brought their souls closer together.
***
In the morning that feeling of perfection stayed, even after Roland woke her up far too early with a kiss, telling her that he had to go to a meeting with a Chinese company. After he left, Claire let herself drift in and out of bliss-filled dreams. She was certain they were meant to be together. And whether it was genetics or not, she did like him. They got along, and they were highly compatible when it came to sex. They could be together forever.
Hell, I might be afraid to admit it, but the only reason I haven't told him I love him is because I don't want to seem like a psycho clingy girlfriend.