Never mind. You know. It is true. I could never love the child. In fact I avoided the sight of her. She was an unpleasant reminder of much that I wished to forget. But when you came I felt differently.
You made me see her as a lonely child, suffering from the sins of grownup people. You see, you changed me, Marty dear. Your coming changed the whole household. That is what confirms me in my belief that with us it is going to be different from anything that has ever happened to me before. “
” Connan, I want to make that child happy. I want to make her forget that there is a doubt as to her parentage. Let her be able to accept you as her father. It is what she needs.”
” You will be a mother to her. Then I must be her father.” _ ” We are going to be so happy, Connan.”
” Can you see into the future?”
” I can see into ours, for our future is what we make it, and I intend that it shall be one of complete happiness.”
” And what Miss Leigh decides shall be, will be. And you will promise me not to be hurt if you hear gossip about me?”
” You are thinking of Lady Treslyn, I know. She has been your mistress.”
He nodded. “
Then I said : ” She will never be again. That is all over.”
He kissed my hand. ” Have you not sworn eternal fidelity?”
” But, Connan,” I said, ” she is so beautiful and she will still be there.”
” But I am in love,” he answered, ” for the first time in my life.”
” And you were not in love with her?”
” Lust, passion,” he answered, ” they sometimes wear the guise of love; but when one meets true love one recognises them for what they are. Dearest, let us bury all that is past. Let us start afresh from this day forth … you and I … for better for worse….”
I was in his arms again. ” Connan,” I said, ” I am not dreaming, am I? Please say I am not dreaming. “
It was late when I left him. I went to my room in a haze of happiness.
I was afraid to sleep for fear I should wake up and find it had all been a dream.
In the morning I went to Alvean’s room and told her the news.
For a few seconds a satisfied smile appeared at the corners of her mouth; then she assumed indifference, but it was too late. I knew that she was pleased.
” You’ll stay with us all the time now, Miss,” she said.
” Yes,” I assured her.
” I wonder if I shall ever ride as well as you.”
” Probably better.
You’ll be able to have more practice than I ever could. “
Again that smile touched her lips. Then she was serious. ” Miss,” she said, ” what shall I call you? You’ll be my stepmother, won’t you?”
” Yes, but you can call me what you like.”
“Not Miss!”
” Well, hardly. I shan’t expect Miss any more.”
” I expect I shall have to call you Mamma.” Her mouth hardened a little.
” If you do not like that you could call me Martha in private. Or Marty. That’s what my father and sister always called me.”
” Marty,” she repeated.
“I like that. It sounds like a horse.”
” What could be better praise,” I cried, and she regarded my amusement with continued seriousness. I went to Gilly’s room.
” Gilly,” I said, ” I’m going to be Mrs. TreMellyn.” The blankness left the blue eyes and her smile was dazzling. Then she ran to me and buried her head in my bodice. I could feel her body shaking with laughter.
I could never be quite sure what was going on among all the shadowy vagueness of Gilly’s mind, but I knew she was contented. She had bracketed me with Alice in her mind and I felt that she was less surprised than I or Alvean, or anyone else, would be.
To Gilly it was the most natural thing in the world that I should take Alice’s place. I believe that, from that moment, for Gilly I became Alice.
It was a merry journey home. We sang Cornish songs all the way to the station. I had never seen Connan so happy. I thought, this is how it will be all the rest of our lives.
Alvean joined in the singing, so did Gilly; and it was astonishing to hear that child, who scarcely ever spoke, singing quietly as though to herself.
We sang the ” Twelve Days of Christmas.” Connan had a rich baritone
voice which was very pleasant to hear and I felt y I had reached the very peak of happiness as he sang the first lines.
” The first day of Christmas my true love sent to me A partridge in a pear tree.”
We went through the song and I had difficulty in remembering all the gifts after the five golden rings; and we laughed together hilariously while we argued as to how many maids there were a-milking, and how many geese a-laying were sent.
” But they were not very sensible things,” said Alvean, ” except of course the five gold rings. I think he was pretending he loved her more than he really did.”
” But he was her true love,” I protested.
” How could she be sure?” asked Alvean.
” Because he told her so,” answered Connan.
” Then he ought to have given her something better than a partridge in a pear tree. I expect the partridge flew away and the pears were those hard ones which are used for stewing.”
” You must not be hard on lovers,” Connan cried. ” All the world loves them, and you have to keep in step.”
And so we laughed and bantered until we boarded the train.
Billy Trehay met us with the carriage and I was astonished when we reached the house, for I then realised that Connan must have sent a message to arrive before we did. He wanted me to be received with honours. Even so I was unprepared for the reception which was waiting for us in the hall.
The servants were all there—the Polgrey and Tapperty families and others from the gardens and stables, and even the village boys and girls who came to help and whom I scarcely knew.
They were lined up ceremoniously, and Connan took my arm as we entered the hall.
” As you know,” he said, ” Miss Leigh has promised to marry me. In a few weeks’ time she will be your Mistress.”
The men bowed and the women curtsied, but I was conscious, as I smiled at them and walked along the line with Connan, that there was a certain wariness in their eyes.
As I had guessed, they were not ready to accept me as mistress of the house . yet.
There was a big fire in my room and everything looked cosy and welcoming. Daisy brought my hot water. She was a little remote, I thought. She did not stop and chat with me as she had hitherto.
I thought: I will regain their confidence, but of course I had to remember that, as the future Mistress of the house, I must not gossip as I once had.
I dined with Connan and Alvean and afterwards I went up with Alvean; and when I had said good night to her I joined Connan in the library.
There were so many plans to make, and I gave myself up to the complete joy of contemplating the future.
He asked me if I had written to my family, and I told him that I had not yet done so. I still could not quite believe this was really happening to me.
” Perhaps this token will help you to remember,” he said. Then he took a jewel case from a drawer in the bureau and showed me a beautiful square-cut emerald set in diamonds.
“It’s … quite beautiful, far too beautiful for me.”
” Nothing is too beautiful for Martha TreMellyn,” he said, and he took my left hand and put the ring on the third finger.
I held it out and stared at it.
” I never thought to possess anything so lovely.”
” It’s the beginning of all the beautiful things I shall bring to you.
It’s the partridge in the pear tree, my darling. “
Then he kissed my hand and I told myself that, whenever I doubted the truth of all that was happening to me, I could look at my emerald and know I was not dreaming.
Next morning when I went down Connan had gone out on business, and after I had given Alvean and Gilly their lessons-for I was eager that everything should go on as before—I went to my room, and I had not been there for more than a few minutes when there was a discreet knock. “Come in,” I said; and Mrs. Polgrey entered.
She looked a little furtive, and I knew that something significant had happened.
” Miss Leigh,” she said, ” there will be things which we have to discuss. I was wondering if you would come to ray room. I have the kettle on. Could you drink a cup of tea?”
I said I would like that. I was very anxious that there should be no difference in our relationship which, from my point of view, had always been a very pleasant and dignified one.
In her room we drank tea. There was no suggestion of whisky this time, and this secretly amused me although I made no reference to it. I should be the mistress of the house, and it was very different for her to know of the tea-tippling than the mere governess.
She again congratulated me on my engagement and told me how delighted she was. ” In fact,” she said, ” the whole household is delighted.”
She asked me then if I intended to make changes, and I answered that, while the household was so efficiently run by herself, I should make none at all.
This was a relief to her, I could see, and she settled down to come to the point.
” While you’ve been away. Miss Leigh, there’s been a bit of excitement in these parts.”
” Oh?” I said, feeling that we were now coming to the reason for my visit.
” It’s all along of the sudden death of Sir Thomas Treslyn.”
My heart had begun to leap in a disconcerting manner.
” But,” I said, ” he is buried now. We went to his funeral.”
” Yes, yes. But that need not be the end. Miss Leigh.”
” I don’t understand, Mrs. Polgrey.”
” Well, there’s been rumours … nasty rumours, and letters have been sent.”
” To … to whom?”
” To her, Miss Leigh… to the widow. And, it seems, to others... and as a result they’re going to dig him up. There’s going to be an examination. “
” You mean … they suspect someone poisoned him?”
” Well, there’s been these letters, you see. And him dying so sudden.
What I don’t like is that he was here last. It’s As I had guessed, they were not ready to accept me as mistress of the house . yet.
There was a big fire in my room and everything looked cosy and welcoming. Daisy brought my hot water. She was a little remote, I thought. She did not stop and chat with me as she had hitherto.
I thought: I will regain their confidence, but of course I had to remember that, as the future Mistress of the house, I must not gossip as I once had.
I dined with Connan and Alvean and afterwards I went up with Alvean; and when I had said good night to her I joined Connan in the library.
There were so many plans to make, and I gave myself up to the complete Joy of contemplating the future.
He asked me if I had written to my family, and I told him that I had not yet done so. I still could not quite believe this was really happening to me.
” Perhaps this token will help you to remember,” he said. Then he took a jewel case from a drawer in the bureau and showed me a beautiful square-cut emerald set in diamonds.
“It’s … quite beautiful, far too beautiful for me.”
” Nothing is too beautiful for Martha TreMellyn,” he said, and he took my left hand and put the ring on the third finger.
I held it out and stared at it.
” I never thought to possess anything so lovely.”
” It’s the beginning of all the beautiful things I shall bring to you.
It’s the partridge in the pear tree, my darling. “
Then he kissed my hand and I told myself that, whenever I doubted the truth of all that was happening to me, I could look at my emerald and know I was not dreaming.
Next morning when I went down Connan had gone out on business, and after I had given Alvean and Gilly their lessons-for I was eager that everything should go on as before—I went to my room, and I had not been there for more than a few minutes when there was a discreet knock. “Come in,” I said; and Mrs. Polgrey entered.
She looked a little furtive, and I knew that something significant had happened.
” Miss Leigh,” she said, ” there will be things which we have to discuss. I was wondering if you would come to my room. I have the kettle on. Could you drink a cup of tea?”
I said I would like that. I was very anxious that there should be no difference in our relationship which, from my point of view, had always been a very pleasant and dignified one.
In her room we drank tea. There was no suggestion of whisky this time, and this secretly amused me although I made no reference to it. I should be the mistress of the house, and it was very different for her to know of the tea-tippling than the mere governess.
She again congratulated me on my engagement and told me how delighted she was. ” In fact,” she said, ” the whole household is delighted.”
She asked me then if I intended to make changes, and I answered that, while the household was so efficiently run by herself, I should make none at all.
This was a relief to her, I could see, and she settled down to come to the point.
” While you’ve been away. Miss Leigh, there’s been a bit of excitement in these parts.”
” Oh?” I said, feeling that we were now coming to the reason for my visit.
” It’s all along of the sudden death of Sir Thomas Treslyn.”
My heart had begun to leap in a disconcerting manner.
” But,” I said, ” he is buried now. We went to his funeral.”
” Yes, yes. But that need not be the end. Miss Leigh.”
” I don’t understand, Mrs. Polgrey.”
” Well, there’s been rumours … nasty rumours, and letters have been sent.”
” To … to whom?”
” To her. Miss Leigh… to the widow. And, it seems, to others ..
and as a result they’re going to dig him up. There’s going to be an examination. “
” You mean … they suspect someone poisoned him?”
” Well, there’s been these letters, you see. And him dying so sudden.
What I don’t like is that he was here last. It’s not the sort of thing one likes to have connected with the house. “
She was looking at me oddly. I thought I saw speculation in her eyes.
I wanted to shut from my mind all the unpleasant thoughts which kept coming to me.
I saw again Connan and Lady Treslyn in the punch room together, their backs towards me . laughing together. Had Connan loved me then? One would not have thought so. I thought of the words they had spoken in my hearing when the party was over. ” It will not be long … now.”
She had said that . and to him. And then there was the conversation I had partly overheard in the woods.
What did this mean?
There was a question that hammered in my brain. But I would not let my mind dwell on it.
I dared not. I could not bear to see all my hopes of happiness shattered. I had to go on believing, so I would not ask myself questions.
I looked expressionlessly into Mrs. Polgrey’s face.
” I thought you’d want to know,” she said.
I was afraid, more afraid than I had ever been since I came to this house.
The body of Sir Thomas Treslyn, who had died after supping at Mount Mellyn, was to be exhumed. People were suspicious of the manner in which he died and, as a result, there had been anonymous letters. Why should they be suspicious? Because his wife wanted him out of the way; and it was known that Connan and Linda Treslyn had been lovers. There had been two obstacles to their union—Alice and Sir Thomas. Both had died suddenly.
But Connan had no wish to marry La
dy Treslyn. He was in love with me.
A terrible thought bad struck me. Did Connan know that there was to be this exhumation? Had I been living in a fool’s paradise? Was my wonderful dream-come-true nothing but a living nightmare?
Was I being used by a cynic? Why did I not use the harsher word? Was I being used by a murderer7 I would not believe it. I loved Connan. I had sworn to be faithful to him all my life. How could I make such a vow when I believed the worst of him at the first crisis?
I tried to reason with myself. You’re crazy, Martha Leigh. Do you really think that a man such as Connan TreMellyn could suddenly fall in love with you’.
Yes, I do. I do, I retorted hotly.
But I was a frightened woman.
I could see that the household was divided between two topics of conversation: the exhumation of Sir Thomas and the proposed marriage of the master and the governess.
I was afraid to meet the stern eyes of Mrs. Polgrey, the lewd ones of Tapperty and the excited ones of his daughters. Did they, as I had begun to do, connect these two events? I asked Connan what he thought of the Treslyn affair. ” Mischief-makers,” he said. ” They’ll have an autopsy and find he died a natural death. Why, his doctor had been attending him for years and has always told him that he must expect to go off like that.”
” It must be very worrying for Lady Treslyn.”
” She will not worry unduly. Indeed, since she has been pestered by letter-writers she may well be relieved to have the matter brought to a head.”
I pictured the medical experts. They would no doubt be men who knew the Treslyns and Connan. As Connan was going to marry me—and he was very eager to spread the news—was it possible that they would approach the matter in a different spirit from that in which they would if they believed Lady Treslyn was eager to marry again? Who could say?
I must drive away these terrible thoughts. I would believe in Connan, I had to; if I did not I must face the fact that I had fallen in love with a murderer.
The invitations for the ball had gone out hastily too hastily, I thought. Lady Treslyn, being in mourning and with the autopsy pending, was of course not invited. It was to take place only four days after our return from Penlandstow.
Celestine and Peter Nansellock rode over the day before the ball.
Celestine put her arms about me and kissed me.
Mistress of Mellyn Page 24