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A Breath Too Late

Page 15

by Rocky Callen


  Regina (thank you for letting me borrow your name!) and Shona, my soul squad. You both are creative goddesses. You’ve been with me from the beginning and have been witness to some of my most life-changing moments and epiphanies. In fact, you often were vital in the manifestation of them. It is such a privilege to be your witness. It is an honor that you were mine. Thank you. For pushing me, loving me, celebrating me, and believing in me. Our moments together sparkle with magic.

  Mama and Papa, your creative hearts left us a legacy of artistic love. I miss you so much, but when I need you, I feel you near. When I signed my contract, I surrounded myself with your handwriting and heirlooms because I knew none of this would have been possible without you.

  Dad, you’ve become one of my most cherished cheerleaders and greatest friends. Your strength and support have meant so much to me. You’ve been such a source of comfort over these years. You are an amazing father and grandfather, and I am so happy that we have you in our lives. The #1 Papa Jorge and Daddio. Thank you for reminding me to focus on the important and to not be afraid to honor myself along the way. Lori, thank you for being such a beautiful addition to our family unit. You have braved so much and are such a testament of love. We are so lucky to have you in our lives.

  Martina, my sister and chivi. You are so gloriously YOU and I am always taken aback by your heart, talent, and brilliance. Damn, woman. The world better get ready for you. I feel like I could make being proud of you my profession. You never let me forget who I am and where my heart is leading me. Keep shining bright, love. The world needs you full blast. So do I.

  Oh, my mama bear (aka the sasha). Where would I be without you? Not here at all. Your strength, audacious optimism, and beautiful openness to life are a marvel. You sacrificed, you loved, you gave and gave. For me. For us. For the dreams we wanted to make real. Our coffee table was the altar to all our hopes. I am blessed to be your daughter. We found our art and hearts at the same time. Thank you. You always told me to be unafraid of flying even when we felt lost in the dark. Look at our lives now. Storms have come, but we still have this wide-open blue sky. Let’s fly higher. And as you soar, remember that your wings (and song) are beautiful.

  Jese, mi vida, you make me laugh, you hold me up, you squeeze me tight. You have been the rock on which I have sharpened my blade and the foundation on which I can stand, sure and certain. You are my anchor when I feel unsteady and drifting, and your shoulder has been my refuge. You remind me that I am limitless and that nothing is impossible. You have given me our beautiful children and this life so full of love and devotion. You are strength, heart, love, power. I am humbled by your faith, hard work and sacrifice, and bright and tenacious spirit. You bring color to my life every day. I am proud of the man you have become and honored to have you by my side.

  Gio, my little dragon. You kept your momma strong while I was on this journey. You showed me what I was capable of. You also taught me that sleep and cuddles should never be taken for granted and that it is very possible to live your happiest days hanging on smiles and baby giggles. Daddy and I waited a long time for you. Thank you for choosing us to be yours.

  Juliette, my daughter, it is my greatest honor to be your mother. You are all heart and love and art. I remember how my whole life stuttered awake at the sound of your heartbeat. I started writing again because of you. I knew if I was going to ask you to live your dreams then it was time I started to live mine. Dream, my little wonder woman. And then live a life full of them. I love you.

  About the Author

  Rocky Callen, the daughter of an Ecuadorian immigrant, has long lived a life of service ever since she was a thirteen-year-old advocating for her undocumented neighbors. She interned at NASA at twelve years old, started lobbying congress at thirteen, and wrote and produced student radio stories at NPR at fourteen. She was a behavioral therapist for over ten years. She is an MFA student at Vermont College of Fine Arts and lives outside of Washington, DC, with her husband, daughter, and brand-new baby boy. A Breath Too Late is her debut novel. Follow her on Twitter @rocky_writes.

  Vist her online at rockycallen.com, or sign up for email updates here.

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  Contents

  Title Page

  Copyright Notice

  Dedication

  Author’s Note

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  The Year of Graduation

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Chapter 35

  Chapter 36

  Chapter 37

  Chapter 38

  Chapter 39

  Chapter 40

  Chapter 41

  Chapter 42

  Chapter 43

  Chapter 44

  Chapter 45

  Chapter 46

  Chapter 47

  Chapter 48

  Chapter 49

  Chapter 50

  Chapter 51

  Chapter 52

  The Last Day

  Chapter 53

  Now

  Chapter 54

  Chapter 55

  Chapter 56

  Chapter 57

  Chapter 58

  Chapter 59

  Chapter 60

  Help Is Here

  Acknowledgments

  About the Author

  Copyright

  Text copyright © 2020 by Rocky Callen

  Henry Holt and Company, LLC

  Publishers since 1866

  Henry Holt® is a registered trademark of Macmillan Publishing Group, LLC.

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  All rights reserved.

  Library of Congress Control Number: 2019949141

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  First hardcover edition 2020

  eBook edition April 2020

  eISBN 9781250238801

 

 

 


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