by Knight,Riley
“I did,” Adam said briefly, and Liam felt his best friend’s hand sneak down to rest on his thigh. He took it in his own, trying to squeeze reassuringly.
God, had he ever thought this would be fun? What sort of idiot had he been? This was nothing more than hell. Awkward, uncomfortable hell.
“No, I meant someone that isn’t just your friend.” The woman didn’t even bother to give Liam a ‘no offense’ kind of look, she just kept on smiling like she wasn’t being horribly inappropriate and kept looking right at Adam.
“Yeah, like I said, I did.” Adam’s voice was dismissive, but his hand was shaking. Across the table, Adam’s father wasn’t eating, either, Liam noticed. He was watching them, and his face was more gray and drawn than ever.
“You know what I mean, Adam. I thought you’d be bringing home someone who means something to you. Someone you might eventually marry.” She sighed softly. “Do you have to make me spell it out?”
“And I keep telling you,” Adam said, his grip like a vice on Liam’s hand. “I did. I’m with someone that I love, and I think you should probably get used to having him around, mom, because I just might marry him.”
Liam turned to look at him, stunned, and then Adam’s father made a strange, strangled little noise, the first sound he’d made all evening. The man grabbed at his right arm almost spasmodically and then slumped over onto the table, panting for breath.
“You son of a bitch, this is all your fault,” Adam’s mother hissed at Liam, her eyes burning. “You killed my husband.”
Chapter Thirteen
Adam
From there, everything happened very quickly. Adam, luckily, was able to keep his wits about him and called for an ambulance, which was there within moments. Soon enough, he, his mother, and Liam were at the hospital, staring at the beige walls and boring art prints.
Dimly, in a way that Adam recognized as being half in shock, he stared around and had to wonder if the same people who had decorated the bank had done the hospital. It was the same style, boring and unremarkable and plain.
Adam’s mother had tried to keep Liam from coming, but Adam had had none of that. Even if Liam hadn’t cared about the fact that his best friend’s father had had a heart attack right in front of him, which Adam knew he did, Adam would need Liam there.
So they sat in silence. There was so much Adam wanted to say, but this wasn’t the time to chew his mother out for her horribly unfair comment to Liam. That time would come, but not when the woman was so worried about someone that she loved.
That was a shocking realization to Adam. His mother loved his father. He had never seen them be all that affectionate toward each other, but love was love, regardless of form, and she was more upset than he would have expected.
Finally, a doctor came into the room, pulling a mask from her face. She looked around, then came over to them, since they were the only people waiting in this particular waiting area.
After confirming that they were the right people, she spoke.
“I’m afraid your husband has had a fairly severe heart attack, probably stress induced. From the conversation I just had with him, it’s probably due mostly to a lifetime of stress. His cortisol was sky high. If you want him around for a long time, he’s going to need to relax a lot more.”
Adam reached over, looping an arm around his mother’s shoulders and hugging her. He wasn’t entirely happy with her, but he knew this was going to change her life drastically. Besides, she was his mother, and always would be.
More shocking, though, than the urge to hug her was that she let him. She even turned into him, and for once, Adam felt like she was vulnerable.
“Will he be okay, doctor?” Adam asked, and the doctor nodded.
“He arrived so quickly that there was no permanent damage to his heart.” She had a good bedside manner, Adam decided. She was compassionate, but direct, she didn’t beat around the bush. “His heart is weak, though, and he does have to be more careful or it could happen again.”
This had to be so strange for both of his parents. Adam had never seen them take a true vacation, they’d brought work with them when they did take time off of work. It had to feel like being told they had to go to Mars to take up hemp farming or something.
“Thank you,” Adam heard his mother say, and the doctor nodded and moved on.
Adam let his mother detangle herself from him, and she went to see her husband. Adam let her go alone. It wouldn’t be good to overwhelm the poor man, and the truth was, Adam was a little nervous to see his father.
Sickness hadn’t been a big part of his life, to this point, and even being in the hospital felt strange to him. He needed a moment.
“She didn’t mean it,” Adam said suddenly, though quietly, turning to look at Liam. “She was just upset about dad.”
He felt defensive, but he shouldn’t have. He wasn’t sure that he’d ever met anyone as laid back as Liam was, as willing to forgive.
“I think she probably did mean it, but it’s okay.” Liam squeezed him lightly before letting him go. “You should go see him.”
Adam looked at his mother, who seemed very pale and shaky to him, but she waved him off when he went to go to her. Obviously, she wanted to be alone, to be lost in her thoughts, and she undoubtedly had a lot to think about.
“I’ll be back,” Adam said quietly, and then went through the door to go see his father, a man who had never seemed weak to him in his life. Not until now.
* * *
Leaving his mom alone with his boyfriend (if that’s what Liam was to him) was a stressful thing to do, but Adam knew that Liam could hold his own. He also knew that if he didn’t go see his dad in the hospital, there was a special place in hell for him.
When he pushed open the door, it wasn’t as bad as he thought. His father wasn’t hooked up to tons of machines, as he had been expecting. There was a heart rate monitor clipped onto a finger which beeped reassuringly, but that was just about it.
His color wasn’t bad, even in the ugly green dress that they’d put on him. No, he looked okay, and Adam went to sit beside the bed.
“Hey Dad,” he said, and then realized that he had no idea what to say to his father. When had he ever talked to the man for more than a couple of seconds? Did they even have anything in common?
Adam’s dad had been there for important events, mostly. He never talked much, but when Adam’s little league team had gone to the city finals, his dad had been there. When Adam had graduated, his dad had been there.
“Hey son,” Adam’s father said, and his voice sounded somehow more human than it had been. His father, after all, was just a man, with all of the frailties of any man.
There was a silence between them, and Adam struggled desperately to think of something, anything, to say that would break that silence. In the end, though, it was his father who did it.
“I heard what your mother said to Liam.” Adam looked at his father, head tilted to the side, wondering if he was about to have to decide whether to defend his lover and best friend at the cost of upsetting his father or not.
“Yeah,” Adam said quietly, but his muscles were tense, his shoulders squared with determination. He would be restrained, he decided. He wouldn’t get into a fight about it, he didn’t want to hurt his father more, but he wasn’t going to sit by and listen to anything bad about Liam.
“She was wrong, and I’ve told her so,” Adam’s father said, very dignified, somehow, despite being in a hospital bed. “I wasn’t expecting my son to fall in love with another man, but this is 2016. It’s time for her to stop being ridiculous about it.”
Adam felt like a balloon that had been abruptly punctured by a very sharp pin. All the fight went out of him, and he stared at the older man, stunned.
“Don’t look at me like that. I want what makes you happy. You haven’t been happy in a long time.” The man looked down at himself. “I thought I was happy, but look where that got me? Don’t make my mistakes. Do what your heart tel
ls you to do.”
For the first time since Adam was a little kid, he actually impulsively reached over to hug his father, and rejoiced at the feeling of the strong arms that were wrapped around him.
“I love you,” Adam said, very quietly. He wasn’t sure when he’d be brave enough, if ever, to acknowledge these feelings, so it was important to say it right then.
“I love you, too. Now get out of here. And send my wife back in, please.”
Adam did leave, and as he did, he was reeling. That was a more meaningful exchange than he’d expected to ever have with his father. It was a little sad that it had taken the other man’s life being in danger before it could happen, but he was glad that it had.
* * *
After that meeting with his father, there seemed to be not much reason for Adam to stick around. His father was out of the woods, it seemed, and wanted to be with his wife. There didn’t seem to be a lot of risk, so Adam walked over to Liam and held out his hand to him.
“Take me home, please.” More than anything, Adam wanted to be somewhere safe. It had been a horrible day, though with some pretty incredible highlights, and he wanted it to be over.
Liam looked at his hand in surprise, and Adam realized that they hadn’t exactly been holding hands in public. He had thought it was out of his own issues, but maybe Liam didn’t want to?
Then Liam took his hand and stood up and their fingers slid so that they were linked together. It felt perfect, and Adam grinned at Liam, who was grinning right back at him.
Yes, it had been a horrible day, but with some definite good moments.
Together, they walked out to the car, and they were both fairly silent. Adam was glad for that, since he’d felt rather like he was being bombarded from the moment that he’d stepped through his parents’ door.
His mind was still reeling, to start with. But as they settled down in Adam’s car (Adam handed over the car keys to his best friend without a peep of protest. He didn’t feel like driving), he found his mind clearing a little.
Liam had become a sort of constant reminder of what Adam had left behind. It had been a strain on their friendship, because every time Liam succeeded, Adam had to face the fact that he’d walked away from that success precisely because he’d claimed that it could never happen.
Their friendship had been strong enough to weather it, but when Adam looked at Liam now, he realized that there was so much more to what he felt for Liam than that. So much more, too, than the friendship that they’d been sharing for so long.
“I talked to Dad,” Adam said abruptly, as Liam started the car and headed off. For where, Adam didn’t really care. Wherever Liam took him was fine with Adam.
“Oh?” Liam asked politely. He was clearly curious, but not sure how much Adam wanted to talk about what had happened. His caution was understandable. After all, it was Adam’s father in the hospital.
“Yeah. He told me to follow my heart,” Adam said quietly. As he looked at Liam, it became more and more clear to him just where that would lead him. “Liam, I know that you’re not into relationships, so I won’t ask for one. But if you ever do want one … I’m here.”
There was a silence between them as they both thought. Or at least, Adam assumed that Liam was thinking, from the slight frown on his handsome face as he drove.
Liam took them to Adam’s house, which Adam supposed made perfect sense, because Adam had, after all, asked to be taken home. The truth was, though, he wouldn’t have cared where Liam took them, his house or Adam’s, because his home, he had come to realize, was with Liam.
“Why do you think I’m not into relationships?” Liam parked the car in the driveway of Adam’s house, and Adam gazed at the building thoughtfully before turning away.
Funny how he ate and slept here most of the time, and yet the expensive house felt maybe less like home to him than Liam’s house did. Though maybe that made sense, because when was the last time that he’d had Liam over here? No, he went to Liam’s house, that was how it was.
“Well, you are never in one,” Adam pointed out. “Not for more than, what, a week or so?” Adam frowned, turning to face Liam fully. “I’ve never seen you get really into anyone, either.”
Liam shot him an impossibly sexy little smirk.
“Same could be said of you,” Liam pointed out right back. “I know your mom sets you up on dates, but that never works out, right?”
Adam sighed softly. Liam was speaking nothing but the truth. But as he listened to his best friend, he realized something. It seemed that this was an evening for realizations.
“I was never interested in anyone because of you,” Adam said quietly. “I didn’t even know I was into guys, but even so, I was waiting for you to be ready.”
Liam laughed softly, and Adam gave him a dirty look. He knew that it could be seen as ridiculous, but damn it, he hadn’t been making some sort of joke. He had been serious, and he didn’t want to be mocked.
“No, sorry,” Liam said, and he pulled himself together quickly, though his lips still twitched. “I wasn’t laughing because … it’s just that, I was waiting for you. To be ready.”
Huh. It turned out that that was a little funny. In a terrible way, of course. So much wasted time.
“I guess we were both only ready pretty recently,” Adam said, when he’d pulled himself together a little bit.
“Yeah, I think so. But Adam, if that’s what you want, to be with me, then you’ve got it. As much as you want from me, you can have.” Liam reached over, his fingers curving lovingly around the back of Adam’s neck, pulling him closer until their foreheads pressed together.
So Adam was having it offered to him. He didn’t even need to take the second that he would have thought he’d need to think it out. This was what he’d wanted. His mother could approve or not, and in the end, it didn’t really matter. As for the bank, they could see him in court if they tried to fire him for being with another man.
“Yeah. That’s what I want from you, babe,” Adam murmured, and then he shifted his head the tiny bit that was needed so that their lips were pressed together instead of their foreheads. The kiss went on for a long time, and by the end of it, Adam was breathless.
Every so often, Adam had let himself think about Liam as a handsome man. He’d always pushed the thoughts away, but on those rare occasions, he had always assumed there would be some awkwardness if he ever did hook up with another man.
Maybe with any other man, that would be the case. But not with Liam. With Liam, everything that they did felt completely perfect, and the issues that Adam would have expected never seemed to come up.
“I love you,” Adam said, and he was rewarded by Liam’s bright smile.
* * *
Adam’s life just kept changing. When he dragged himself into work the next day, he was actually looking forward to a bit of a rest. Surely no one there would know about what happened, right? It was too soon.
Only he hadn’t accounted for the fact that his mother was so well known, so influential. Everyone, right down to the bank tellers, seemed to know that something was going on.
Right then and there, Adam learned that he hated a certain type of look more than most things on the planet. Surely everyone meant well, but the I’m-so-sorry look that he kept getting from the other people he worked with was absolutely infuriating.
Adam closeted himself in his office, staring at the unremarkable artwork on the wall. Nothing too bold or strong, of course. After all, they wouldn’t want to scare anyone off.
Numb, Adam sat there and stared, doing nothing. Surely he had paperwork to do. He always did. But he didn’t even turn on his work computer.
What was he even doing here?
Getting out of bed, rolling away from Liam and leaving him sleeping, it had seemed wrong. It still felt wrong, jarring somehow, like his skin was too sensitive, like he was somehow too big for this office.
Some time later, Adam looked at his watch and realized it was time for lunch. List
less, he stood up. At least it was something to do, somewhere to go.
It was then that there was a knock on the door and then it was pushed open.
At first, he assumed it was his mother, because she had that particularly annoying habit. Besides, she would be the most likely to visit him from outside the branch on a semi regular basis.
Of course, that was ridiculous, because she would be with his father. At least, he hoped that she would.
“Good morning, Adam.” It was Christine, who was his mother’s boss. Just a little bit older than his mother, Christine looked very similar to her, with her perfect blonde hair and her expensive business suits.
Adam’s mind reeled. Was he going to be fired? Surely one morning of sitting around doing nothing wouldn’t have been noticed yet. But why else would the woman be here? Adam had rarely even met her.
He nodded at her, and then waited. He wasn’t in the mood to play these games, damn it. He wasn’t quite tapping his foot as he waited for her to speak, but he probably gave the impression that he was, and more than that, he didn’t care.
“We’re all thinking about your father,” Christine said, and she seemed sincere enough, even if Adam wasn’t entirely clear on who ‘we all’ represented.
“Thank you,” Adam said, and he wasn’t even being insincere. He was grateful that people cared, especially because, as he looked at Christine, he realized that she was living exactly the type of life that had led to Adam’s father getting so sick.
Christine nodded, looking a little uncomfortable, and she quickly changed the subject. Maybe she didn’t want to think about stressful jobs and heart attacks.
“Well, I wanted to offer you the job that your mother was going to take,” Christine said, and her face brightened, like she was much more comfortable with this role. “Unofficially, of course. You would have to apply through the official channels, but unofficially, it’s yours.”