The Feisty Traveler - A Quirky Memoir

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The Feisty Traveler - A Quirky Memoir Page 9

by Lil Cromer


  Otzi the Ice Man’s frozen body was discovered in 1991. Officials first thought it was the body of a hiker, but then realized it was a 5300 year old man who died of an arrowhead buried in his shoulder. Otzi is affectionately referred to as “Frozen Fritz,” just to piss off the Germans as he was discovered in the Italian Alps. 55% of the Alps are located in Italy.

  The Italian Riviera

  The Riviera is drop dead gorgeous and is where the French come on holiday because they have turned their Riviera into a concrete jungle. Our base in Santa Margherita turned out to be a privately owned boutique hotel within walking distance of the beach and shopping. I found an outdoor café at a quirky busy intersection to enjoy the local beer and people watch, well actually scooter watch. It amazes me that there aren’t more accidents. I witnessed a couple of close calls. The scooters don’t seem to stop for stop signs. You’d see entire families on scooters, and as many women as men on them, many dressed in heels with purses over their arms. The death rate for scooter drivers in the fourteen to nineteen age bracket is 7 ½%. I’m not a beach person, but I watched beachgoers coming and going to the beautiful beach.

  Portofino

  We took a twenty minute ferry ride to Portofino, which is a fishing village as well as an upscale market resort famous for its picturesque harbor and historical association with celebrity visitors such as Liz Taylor, Richard Burton, Eddie Fisher, Rex Harrison, Truman Capote, Ava Gardner, and Greta Garbo, who was reported to swim naked in the bay. While Portofino offers fancy harbor side dining, the quality doesn’t match the high prices. The sizes of the yachts in the harbor were awesome. Andrea Bocelli performed a concert in this village, which was broadcast on TV. I enjoyed a glass of wine right where he sat and sang to a woman in the audience wishing he were there singing to me. The pastel-painted houses, colorful gardens, and elegant villas were a paparazzi delight.

  Cinque Terre

  One of my favorite places in Italy, this traffic-free, lowbrow alternative to the French Riviera consists of five villages along the Riviera, each with its own unique character, built into the cliffs between the beach and the vineyard-terraced hills of this rocky coastline. There is not a museum in sight, just sun, sea, sand and wine … unadulterated Italy. This makes for happy, relaxed tourists. In October of 2011, the Cinque Terre was hit hard by a devastating flood (22 inches in 4 hours) but the locals rebuilt. We visited Vernazza, which is called the jewel of the Cinque Terre, the closest thing to a natural harbor, overseen by a ruined castle and a stout stone church. It was fun to watch daredevils dive off the rocks into this beautiful harbor. The town’s 500 residents brag: “Vernazza is locally owned Portofino has sold out.” We also visited Manarola which is the most picturesque of the five. It’s reported that St. Mark’s Basilica and the Vatican are the best spots in the country to be jostled and robbed. However a couple of women in our group were victims of gypsy pickpockets while boarding a train from Santa Margherita to Cinque Terre. However, they neglected to heed the advice of our tour guide: leave your credit cards and other values in the hotel and keep your purse over your shoulder and clutched in front of you. One of the young women slapped the hand of a female gypsy and was able to retrieve her bright pink wallet.

  These days, with the advent of industrialization, the five villages are experiencing some depopulation as many people have migrated into cities.

  Florence

  The city is a monument to the Renaissance, the artistic and cultural reawakening of the 15th century. Writers such as Dante, Petrarch and Machiavelli contributed to its proud literary heritage, but it was the paintings and sculptures of artists like Botticelli, Michelangelo and Donatello that turned the city into one of the world’s greatest artistic capitals. The best of Florence lies on the north bank of the Arno River. Though small, Florence is intense. I was prepared for scorching summer heat, slick pickpockets, very few bathrooms, steep prices, and long lines. We were warned that tourist money has corrupted some locals making them greedy and dishonest, so we checked our bills carefully. Once brutal for pedestrians, the city is now delightful on foot but brutal in the summer. Florence was my least favorite destination on the tour. There’s a fierce city-state pride— locals would pee with gusto in the Arno, knowing rival city-state Pisa was downstream.

  On the outskirts on a beautiful hillside we visited the American Cemetery and Memorial — pretty impressive. The government of Italy granted its use as a permanent burial ground in perpetuity without charge or taxation.

  Pisa

  If it wouldn’t be for the leaning tower, tourists would skip Pisa. The famous tower with a fifteen foot lean is touristy but worth the visit. I was surprised to see that the tower is only a small part of a gleaming white architectural complex featuring a massive cathedral and baptistery that dominates the green square called the Field of Miracles. The entire town leans as it sits on shifting delta sand making construction tricky. With innovative arches, architects didn’t stop the leaning but made wobbly buildings unthreatened. Pisa is the birthplace of Galileo.

  Tuscany

  Renowned for its art, history and evocative landscape, Tuscany is a region where the past and present merge in pleasant harmony. Being a small town gal at heart, those villages we visited held the real Italian experience for me. It was a pleasure and a relief to get out of Florence and Rome.

  Cute boys playing in Lucca

  Pienza, a virtual standing museum, is an example of town planning after the fall of the Roman Empire. Some scenes from The English Patient were filmed here. It’s famous for pecorina cheese made from sheep milk. Pilar made sure we had a hefty round to take home with us.

  Montalcino, in Orcia Valley, sits in the midst of vineyards, and is famous for its delicious Brunello di Montalcino red wines. Everyone I ran into in this low-impact town seemed to be relaxed and in an easy groove, as if enjoying a fine wine buzz — I joined them. A tour of the winery Casato Prime Donne proved to be most interesting because the wine is made only by females. We enjoyed a lunch with samples of three of their best wines.

  Cortona sits on a 1700 foot hill surrounded by dramatic Tuscan and Umbrian views. Under the Tuscan Sun, adapted by Frances Mayes’ book, brought this village into the limelight. Life is Beautiful was also filmed in this picturesque town. I admit to huffing and puffing up some steep hills while exploring. Umbria is only a mile away, so Cortona, defined by Etruscan walls, marks the end of Tuscany.

  San Gimignano, another hill top medieval town is known as the “Town of Towers.” It was fun poking around the narrow stone-paved streets that twist behind the walls of this quaint town. From there we visited a 15th century castle in the Chianti wine country and after touring the castle enjoyed a fine meal along with plenty of wine.

  Lucca, another medieval town with walls all around, is the birthplace of Puccini and Andrea Bocelli and is famous for toilet paper and cigars. Once the walls lost their military importance, they became a pedestrian promenade with square after square.

  Radicofani, an adorable little village in the shadow of a hilltop fortress built in the 10th century underwent centuries of fierce political intrigue and conflict. We bought wine from Silvana, a local merchant and sampled cheese and wine her husband provided. Pilar took eight of us at a time through their modest 550 sq. ft. home — such trust!

  Montepulciano is another medieval and Renaissance hill town famous for its pork, cheese, pici pasta, (fat spaghetti), lentils, and honey, and let’s not forget its world renowned wine.

  Assisi

  This beautiful medieval town, with its hung geranium lined streets, lovely views and fountain-splashed plazas is heir to the legacy of St. Francis who is buried in the Basilica. Sadly the town suffered serious damage during the earthquake of 1997, but restoration was quickly completed in two years. Francis, an unattractive 5’ 4” tall man, renounced his family’s wealth to found an order of preaching monks who lived simply and relied on begging to survive. As with most pilgrimage sites, this town is overrun with St. Francis fans s
cooping up glow-in-the-dark rosaries and bobble-head friars. I walked a block or two away from the main drag and found peace and serenity that must have made Francis feel at peace. He only lived to the age of forty-five but left a legacy of humanism, equality, but most especially, a love of nature. He treated every creature — animal, peasant, pope with equal respect. Interestingly he was the first to receive the stigmata and the first to design the nativity scene. An eighteen year old rich girl from Assisi, so inspired by Francis’ message, that she ran away from home to meet Francis. He cut her hair and clothed her in a simple brown tunic and welcomed her into the life of poverty. She was joined by other women who banded together as the Poor Clares, a contemplative order of nuns.

  When St. Francis was asked what he’d do if he found out he had a short time to live, he said, “I’d keep on hoeing.”

  While there I looked for a replacement of a novelty item I owned many years ago and lost in one of my moves. It was a rubber statue of a Franciscan monk and when you hit it on the head a small penis popped out of the robe. One of the vendors who spoke English told me the clergy confiscated their supply without reimbursement and banned the sales in Assisi.

  Naples

  Naples is Italy in the extreme, its best the birthplace of pizza and Sophia Loren and its worst the home of the Camorra, Naples “family” of organized crime. Here you’ll find a brash and vibrant street life. It’s the third largest city in Italy with more than one million people and has almost no open spaces or parks. It impresses observant travelers with its knack for living, eating, and raising children in the streets with humor and decency, however it didn’t impress me in the least.

  Sorrento

  This city of 20,000 is the gateway to the Amalfi Coast, where almost everyone speaks English. There’s an unspoiled old quarter, a lively main shopping street and a spectacular cliff side setting. This area is famous for growing lemons of all varieties. I saw some that were bigger than grapefruit.

  Sorrento sits in a romantic location overlooking the Bay of Naples. Here mythical sirens with their sweet singing lured sailors to shipwreck on the rocks. In Sorrento we visited a men’s club (mentioned earlier) where retired guys hang out, play cards and drink beer for the meager dues of thirty-five euros per year. One man we met worked for Chevron years ago and shared stories with us. Another guy, a bit shy until Pilar insisted he come and meet us, had a great pair of legs from walking up and down from his home several times per day; he had a black belt in karate. It’s always a treat talking and meeting with the real people! Sorrento is virtually crime free unlike Naples because this is the city where the Mafia launder money. Stories abound of tourists losing their wallets which are returned intact.

  One of the highlights was an optional tour called the “Sorrentine Adventure,” where we visited a local farm with four acres of crops terraced into the hills. We learned how olive oil was made, how mozzarella was made as well as Limoncello. We each made our own pizza, sorrentine fashion, topped with ingredients raised on the farm, then enjoyed them for lunch with homemade wine. A personable brother and sister team own and operate this farm.

  Capri, correct pronunciation is CAPri, not the more common caPRI, is located in the Bay of Naples, which sits opposite of Mt. Vesuvius. It’s been an international jet set destination since the time of Roman emperors Augustus and Tiberius. This miniature paradise, only four miles by two miles, is crowded and a tourist trap. One highlight was the Gardens of Augustus which overlook the famous Faraglioni Rocks formed by years of erosion.

  Amalfi Coast

  The Amalfi Coast was high on my bucket list and it didn’t disappoint. This breathtaking coastline is also a UNESCO site with its rugged shoreline, colorful fishing boats and awesome rock formations. We took a boat ride and enjoyed the view from the water.

  With its stunning scenery, hills, harbor-hugging towns, and historic ruins, Amalfi is Italy’s coast with the most. I’ve seen some pretty stunning coasts in California, New Zealand, Ireland, England, and Canada, but this wins the prize. Our white-knuckle bus trip from Sorrento to Salerno along the Amalfi Coast has to be one of the world’s scariest rides. Bus drivers here have nerves of steel maneuvering through hairpin turns and were sometimes forced to back up. You gain respect for the road builders in the 1800s. As you hyperventilate you notice how the Mediterranean, a sheer 500-foot drop below really twinkles.

  Outside of Sorrento and to your right are two small islands which were once owned by Rudolf Nureyev. This technically begins the Amalfi Coast drive. Limestone absorbs heat, making this south-facing coast at least ten degrees hotter than Sorrento, just what we needed in August. Bougainvillea and geraniums grow like weeds here in the summer, I took some outstanding photos. The small town of Amalfi was home for many years to Gore Vidal. After Rome fell, Amalfi was one of the first cities to trade goods like coffee, carpets, and paper. Paper has been a vital industry since the Middle Ages.

  Scala, the oldest town on the Amalfi Coast, was the birthplace of Mayor Rudy Giuliani’s grandfather. After 9/11, the residents of this small town sent a sculpture of two angels pulling a child out of the ashes to NYC as a tribute to lives lost in the vicious terrorist attack. Giuliani sent it back stating more Americans would see it in Scala. Today, tour groups stop at this impressive memorial — newspaper headlines from around the US line a tunnel leading to the sculpture. The Italians were proud of how unified we were after 9/11. Richard Wagner composed “Parsifal” in Ravella, another picturesque town along the coast.

  Carlo Ponti bought Sophia Loren a watch tower on the cliffs of the coast and then built an extravagant white villa directly above it which we were able to see from the boat. In 2008, Loren, while hosting her own 73rd birthday party there, heard a knock at the door. The tax collectors had come to collect taxes she owed (amount never revealed) from the income earned in the 50s and 60s. They gave her two options, pay the delinquency or go to jail. She elected to do neither, then handed them the keys to the villa and moved to the US. All contents were left behind and the villa was later sold to pay the taxes. For this action, she fell out of favor with the Italian people.

  Positano

  This is the heart of the Amalfi Coast and hangs halfway between Sorrento and Amalfi. Our tour stopped here only for a photo op. Steep stairs here are a way of life for the 4000 locals. Only one street here allows motorized traffic — the rest are steep pedestrian lanes.

  Pompeii

  Pompeii was totally buried by the eruption of Mt. Vesuvius in 79 AD and not rediscovered until the 17th century. It’s one of the world’s 100 most endangered sites. Our tour guide opted for an early start to discover this site in order to avoid negotiating the rocky terrain in the heat of the day. One interesting spot was the House of Prostitution, where the “menu” was in the form of wall frescos and the bed was concrete. Encased in glass are two bodies that were buried in ash from the eruption.

  Italy today: By the end of 2011 Italy’s debt load was second worst in the euro zone behind Greece. After that hedonistic prime minister, Berlusconi, stepped down and was eventually convicted, the government was taken over by former European Commissioner Mario Monti. He appointed a cabinet composed entirely of unelected professionals rather than politicians much like our appointed Czars. The Yale-trained Monti has his hands full enforcing austerity while trying to promote growth.

  One of the miracles of Italy is that a relatively small country contains such a wealth of stunning scenery and beautiful old cities. This trip made me realize how very young America is.

  Chapter 11

  Cruising

  *

  Some people go through life leisurely like on a river raft going where the craft takes them while others go through life in a canoe paddling upstream.

  The first cruise I ever took was over forty years ago. My husband and I agreed to be part of a bowling group his cousin belonged to who were taking a short cruise to the Bahamas. I remember only three things about this cruise. First the cousin tried to keep her littl
e flock together throughout the cruise, an impossibility. Secondly, she brought along a portable bar that was redundant since cruise ships are known for the availability of liquor. Third, I remember being in awe walking through the Atlantis Hotel on Paradise Island; I’ve never seen so many water activities in one place nor more beautiful gardens.

  Since that first short cruise, I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve sailed in the Caribbean. My favorite cruise partner, Millie, organized a cruise with twelve of her family and friends to celebrate her mom’s 80th birthday. We didn’t know it was a big band cruise until we got aboard. The oldsters with their walkers and canes shoved us out of the way to get into the elevators, and to sit at choice tables. Since we were all women, there were plenty of opportunities to let our hair down. One friend in particular befriended the onboard German chef exchanging favors for bottles of champagne and a special birthday cake for our table. When Millie’s fiancé died in her arms, I persuaded her to go on a cruise to work through her grief. We met in Tampa and took a week’s cruise to the Caribbean. We ordered a good sized wine package and asked to be seated at a large table. About mid cruise we were at a bar at noon drinking when I looked over to see my friend guzzling tequila out of a funnel. That could have been the turning point to her recovery from the tragic loss.

  Mexican Riviera

  I’ve always been fascinated with Elizabeth Taylor and wanted to see the home Richard Burton bought for her in Puerta Vallarta while filming Night of the Iguana. The large purple structure still sits high on a hill but was sold years ago and is now a hotel. Cabo San Lucas is at the southern tip of the Baja Peninsula and the perfect place to play on beautiful beaches. I met a couple of Canadians on the cruise who offered my travel partner and me Maple Leaf pins to wear, pointing out that the Mexicans are not too fond of Americans. At first I doubted him but noticed the difference in the treatment we received when we wore the Maple Leafs. The entertainment on the Love Boat was exceptional. I especially enjoyed the singing contests each night in the lounge. The only bummer was my roommate, which I’ve described in the Ugly American chapter. Here she is in the lounge during the talent show.

 

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