I’ve found a comfortable medium with what Jackie wants me to wear and what I want to wear. My routine to get ready is under an hour now. Much better. She reluctantly agrees that I can pull off my funky T-shirts with some of the clothes she bought me. Oh, and I really love my chucks. Life simply passes.
~ ~ ~
I adjust my phone on my shoulder. “Hello?”
“Dani.” It’s Brian.
“Hey Brian. What can I do for you?” I’m so used to talking with them now. They’re just friends. Just like anyone.
“Well…I just finished websites for two photographers. They both looked through some other websites that I’ve done and both asked about you and your credentials. When I told them you were nineteen and just starting college, they both asked if you might be interested in working for them.”
“Umm…” I couldn’t make a coherent sound. Professional photographers noticed me? I can’t form a reply so Brian continues on. He’s used to me.
“I just need to know if it’s okay to pass along your information or not. I need you to know , Dani , that your decision does not and will not affect my business relationship with these people in any way. They don’t know we know each other outside of work, understand?”
“Uh…yeah.”
He knows I haven’t found my voice yet.
“Hank is… How should I say this. Talented and very aware. You could learn a phenomenal amount from him , but you’ll really have to watch out for yourself. Mandy is the other one. She’s been doing family portraits and weddings for a while. You won’t learn as much from her, but she’s a member of the church. I can’t really offer any advice. So, do you want me to pass on your information?”
“That’d be great. Thanks.” I laugh then. I feel like every time I have a conversation with him, Leigh or Jackie it ends with me saying thank you.
“What’s so funny Dani?”
“I never thought I’d hear myself say thank you this much in my life.”
He laughs a little too. “You know what? You’re more like my little sister Dani than Auntie Dani…though I guess that would still make you auntie.”
I take this as a huge compliment. “Thank you, Brian.”
“Later.”
I’m so glad I asked to be a part of their life.
~ ~ ~
In the morning Jackie drops my mail on the counter and I have a letter from my brother. Daniel. My heart hurts at the thought. He’s in Afghanistan.
Dani –
Wow, this is weird. I mean, it’s just you, so it shouldn’t be weird, right? Guess I should just tell you what’s up.
Mom and Dad are good. I mean, nothing’s really changed since you left. That’s weird, but everyone’s a year older you know? No, wait. Isaac got married to someone you don’t know. Her family moved in next door and they got married a few months later. Crazy, huh? Gloria is as annoying as ever, maybe even more so since Isaac is pre-occupied with his wife.
I joined the Army, but I think you already knew that. I’m a field medic. Go figure, huh? I’m good at it too, helped with so many scrapes and cuts with the twins. I’m in a good area here. You don’t have to worry about me. Mostly I’ve been doing little first aid stuff for the school age kids here. It’s crazy being out in the desert like this. So hot you can’t breathe during the day, yet we still freeze at night.
I know it’s silly, but I’m almost afraid to ask about you. I’m sure I acted like a jerk, but I still don’t know how I feel about the whole Mormon thing and the getting pregnant thing. I think you can understand that. Anyway, I wrote, so that’s something, right?
Love,
Daniel
It feels so good to hold a piece of paper from my brother. From my family. I’m sort of overwhelmed and hope that this is the start of some sort of reconciliation. Or at the very least, communication.
~ ~ ~
The building where Hank works is tall, brick, old, and beyond cool. I’m immediately nervous. He’s doing a photo shoot for Macy’s later on today. Macy’s. Jackie helped me dress. I need to look like me, to look cool, and to wear something I can move in to take pictures—my favorite grey pants, low heels and a simple blouse. I take a freight elevator to his floor. When I open the door I’m in a room about the size of large gym, and just as high. The tall skinny windows are evenly spaced down each side of the room and the red brick feels both warm and cold at the same time.
It’s easy to see where he’ll be shooting today. The backdrop is large and in place, lights are all set up. There’s an area partitioned off in the corner. If he lives here, that’s where he lives. It is so how I picture the apartment of some famous photographer. I wonder if he’s faking it like Jackie seems to think everyone does, or if he really is this guy. I see Hank crouched on the floor next to some camera equipment. I have mine over my shoulder. I start to walk in. He looks briefly over at me.
“You’re early.” He looks back down. “Macy’s call isn’t for another hour . I don’t need the models lounging around while I set up.”
I almost laugh. He thinks I’m one of the models. I try to think about how Jackie coached me. I’m confident. I’m a photographer. “I’m Dani LeClaire. You called me here because you like my shots.”
He freezes and then stands up, looking at me. “Wow, you’re Dani.” He shuffles his weight to one foot and I get a chance to see him better now. He has dark hair that falls over his face in a way that only an expensive haircut can do. Behind his curly hair is a striking shade of blue eyes. He’s in a great pair of jeans, a belt and a t-shirt that is the trendy amount of messy. He has penetrating eyes and I’m caught up in his incredibly good looks for a moment. I suddenly realize he’s studying me the way I’m studying him. I take a deep breath and try not to blush.
“Well, Dani. This is my test.”
I stand and wait.
“I’ve been using this space for a long time now. Pull out your camera. If you find something I’ve never seen in this space, the job is yours if you want it. I’m a pain to work for, I’m picky, and I want you to know what I’ll want next before I do.”
“I understand.” It’s a challenge.
He gestures for me to go ahead and continues setting up. I’m nervous but looking at the enormous photos on the walls, I can see right away that I’d learn a phenomenal amount from this guy. I’ll probably learn more today than during my semester of photography class.
I pull out my camera and keep my other lenses with me. Holding the camera to my face, I slowly look around the room. Everything in here is interesting. All of the wiring and plumbing is exposed above me. The red brick walls are rich, flawed and beautiful. The windows are so old that on some, the glass is just thicker at the bottom than the top. I look through the camera, through my rectangle box, and find the obvious shots in here. Then I start looking past that. I crouch down; my lens ends up pointing at Hank. Ha, why not? I bet he hasn’t noticed himself in this space before.
He’s concentrating on setting out lenses, filters and plugging in his computer. I take two shots of him, and from my camera, they look good. He looks great—totally oblivious and focused. I go to the opposite side of the room and lay on the floor. I can see the small bits of dust and dirt on the old hardwood floors. I hear the elevator and I zoom in, I get rows of women’s feet entering the room. I like this one too.
“Time’s up, Dani.” Hank stands up and leans against the table.
“Do, do you want me to send you what I took or…”
“No. Come over here. Let’s plug you in.”
“Okay.” I’m surprised. I kind of want to clean up the edges first.
“Here.” He holds out a wire. I plug in and watch my pictures download. He’s working on something else. “Done yet?” he asks.
“Just.” If he’s a person of few words, that suits me. So am I. I’m just big on thoughts. Small on words.
He looks at the first few a bit disinterested. “Where would you crop this one?” He points to one I’d taken of his wind
ows.
I show him with my hands.
“But look at what happens if you do it here.” He shows me with his. The picture is suddenly something completely different than what I’d seen when I snapped it.
He stops at the pictures of him. He looks at the screen and then back at me. And then back at the screen again.
“You’re hired.” He reaches out to take my hand. “If you want it.”
I try not to smile a girlie smile. I try to smile a confident smile. I can tell from his smirk that he sees through me.
“No one’s had the guts to take a photo of me.” He stops. “And there are very, very few photos of me that are worth keeping. These are worth keeping.”
“Thank you.” Wow.
I spend the day with him. I don’t know what everything is called yet because I’ve never worked with the kind of professional cameras he does. He obviously runs the show here. He’s good with the models.
They come out a little nervous, this is local talent, and by the end, they’re sad to leave that special place in front of his lens. I learn a lot about lighting and about how important it is to connect with people if you want their photos to look good.
There’s so much to know and do. I run around all day, trying to keep up. When everyone’s gone I help Hank put his equipment away.
“I hope you remembered everything. Next time I’m going to rely on you a lot more,” he warns.
“Thank you.” I reach my hand out and he takes it.
Danielle LeClaire is now a photographer.
25
Elder Mason,
I’ve been working for Hank for a month already. I’m happy that the time is passing so fast. I don’t know if I’m going to school in the fall or not. I was always a good student and part of me wants a degree but after just a couple of months with Hank, I think I’ve learned more than any degree will teach me about photography. I hope all is well in Puerto Rico.
I realized the other day that I’ve never seen Jackie out on a date. When I asked her about it she said it was simply because she doesn’t want to be married yet. I guess that’s why everything seems so easy for her. She just does the right thing. Anyway, I’m forcing her to go to a back to school singles activity at Gasworks Park. I’m excited. She’s lukewarm.
Dani
It feels good to have enough news to fill a letter.
~ ~ ~
It’s been so crazy I realize that I need an Eliza fix. I miss the Wrights. I head over on the bus like usual and chat with Leigh for a while. Brian is at a meeting with the two guys he works with. They’re debating on bringing a fourth into the mix.
“Hey there , Dani.” Brian smiles at me when he walks in. He heads straight for his wife though and they share a brief moment before falling back into reality. I like it. I’m always a little embarrassed to be here, but they don’t seem to mind.
“So, how’s Hank treating you?” Brian asks.
“Oh, he’s a terrible flirt , but he knows so much. I find myself looking at the shots I took before meeting him and being really frustrated with myself. On the flipside, I’ve come a long way.”
“So, are you headed to school in the fall?” he asks.
“That is an excellent question.” I still have no idea what I’m going to do. “And one I don’t have the answer to.”
“Well, Leigh’s a college dropout and she does okay for herself.”
“Watch it.” She points a figure at him, which he kisses on his way back to the kitchen.
“Do you see this?” She looks at me. “He never takes anything seriously.”
I look at them, and I want this. I think this every time I’m here. It makes me miss Michael more than going to his dad’s house. Eliza is crawling and makes her way over to me, climbs up onto my lap, and gives me a smile. She pulls a slimy toy out of her mouth to hand to me.
“Well, I think it’s time for me to go.” I laugh, trying to keep the slimy teether from touching my face.
“Thanks for coming, Dani.” Leigh’s voice is so honest and kind.
“Thanks for the break.” I stand up.
It’s almost a year now. It’s still hard to leave. Well, not hard to leave, just emotional. I do pretty well this time. It’s still easier when I get to my magic place on the far side of the street. Funny how I set that up in my head and now it works every time. I climb on the bus and sit down. I pull out my camera and start to flip through photos I took that morning on my way to see Eliza.
“No pillow today?”
I jerk my head up to see the sparkly blue-eyed guy I’ve seen on this bus before. I’m speechless.
“It’s just, the last time I saw you out this direction, you had…”
“Yes, I was on somebody’s lap. It was a busy day.” I’m glad I catch on before he finishes. He’s talking about Lucas. That was a long time ago and he remembers. Interesting.
He smiles. “I’m Justin.”
“Dani.” We shake hands. I’m unsure. Is he teasing me in a good way?
“You live around here?”
“Lake Union.” I watch his face. He has a lean face for his large eyes and blond hair with a bit of curl in it. The corners of his mouth pull up in what I’d guess in a near constant smirk.
He raises his eyebrows. “Wow, that puts you way out of my league.”
His league? He’s totally hitting on me. “So you’re not worried about the guy you just referred to as my pillow?”
He purposefully looks up and down the bus, then shrugs. Right, the pillow is absent.
“You’re a photographer?”
“I work for Hank.”
“Adams?”
“Yeah.” I look at him, how does he know who Hank Adams is?
“Wow.”
I have just impressed someone with my job. I’m awesome. We’re at my stop. I don’t know if I should stay and keep talking . I find Justin hard to read.
“This is me.” I stand up.
“See you around, Dani.”
“See you.” I climb off the bus and can’t wipe the smile from my face.
~ ~ ~
“So, we’re really going to this thing.” Jackie’s voice is full of the resignation she shows all over her body. “At Gasworks Park.”
“Yes. It’s a gorgeous day, and when winter comes and we’re living through one grey day after another, you’ll thank me.”
“Yeah, maybe.” She raises an eyebrow.
“Well, you drag me out of here all the time. It’s my turn to drag you.” I smirk.
“Fair enough.”
~ ~ ~
I know a surprising number of people here. Jackie knows almost everyone. I don’t know how she does this. I can tell she’s getting bored making small talk so I make us two hot dogs and invite her on a walk.
“Thank you.” She rolls her eyes and starts to eat. “Why does everyone have to smile all the time?”
“Wow. You are just a happy ray of sunshine today, aren’t you?” I laugh.
“You know what I mean.”
“I know what you mean.” The problem with coming to things like this is that everyone’s trying to put their best foot forward which means everyone is trying way too hard. Singles activity.
We sit on the back of a bench near the water, our feet on the seat.
“Well, if it isn’t the mighty Jackie out hanging in the slums.” A tall blond guy laughs. He looks like a football player. I wonder if he is. He’s wearing a Huskies shirt from the University. He has a friend with him, and I choke on my hotdog when I realize it’s Justin.
“Hey Cody.” Jackie waves. “How’s it going?”
“Excellent.”
“Well, it’s bus girl.” Justin grins.
“And bus boy.” I laugh back. This is crazy.
Jackie looks back at me.
“Oh, I’ve run into Justin on the bus a few times,” I explain.
“Oh, I see.”
“Yep.” Justin smiles. “One time she had the fortunate experience of riding on a good
looking man’s lap.”
Jackie looks at me questioningly.
“Lucas.”
“Oh, Lucas.” She nods. She looks at Justin then. “Well, it’ll be you next.” She teases. “My Dani, always with the boys.”
My Forever (The Next Door Boys) Page 19