“I don’t think so,” she replied, her mouth curving into a smile. “I think we have enough to keep us busy in here.”
Silently agreeing, Rourk let out a breath he wasn’t aware he’d been holding.
***
About the Author
Julia Crane dreamt of elves and teen androids long before she captured them and put them on paper. She’s written and released over fifteen young adult and new adult titles over the past two and a half years. From science fiction adventures to succubus, Julia’s fresh voice is easy to read and imaginative. She is widely known for her Keegan’s Chronicles series and IFICS series, and she has hit numerous bestselling list on Amazon.
Novels available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, iBooks
Coexist: Keegan’s Chronicles #1
Conflicted: Keegan’s Chronicles #2
Consumed: Keegan’s Chronicles #3
Rourk: Keegan’s Chronicles #4
Anna: Keegan’s Chronicles Spin Off
Lauren: Keegan’s Chronicles Spin Off
Freak of Nature IFICS#1
Fractured Innocence IFICS #2
Fatal Abduction #4
Fragile Mind #5 (coming soon)
Starwalkers Serial with Lizzy Ford
Dark Promise with Talia Jager
Broken Promise with Talia Jager
Eternal Youth with Heather Marie Adkins
Find her on:
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SUFFERING – GRACE’S STORY
by K. A. Last
In Fall For Me things didn’t end too well between Grace and Josh. A few weeks later, she decides to go to the city to make sure he’s okay. In an attempt to figure out what she really wants, Grace makes a decision that will change their relationship forever.
***
Suffering – Grace’s Story is a bonus scene which occurs as an interquel to Fall For Me (The Tate Chronicles, #1) and Fight For Me (The Tate Chronicles, #2).
***
Maybe I shouldn’t have come, but the pain wouldn’t stop.
I needed to make it stop.
The slip of paper with Josh’s address on it crinkled in my hand. I stood on the footpath beneath a glowing street light, and looked along the row of terrace houses. The one in front of me had a turquoise door—such an odd colour. Flecks of paint littered the entryway, and the cast-iron balcony rail was twisted in a rusty mess. The number six on the door hung at a skewed angle.
The place looked like a dump.
What was I doing?
Josh would slam the door in my face, and I wouldn’t blame him if he did.
He’d made it clear he couldn’t be near me until I’d sorted out my crap. Crap meaning Seth. But I didn’t know where to start.
Angelica had taken Seth, and I had no way of finding her if she didn’t want to be found. The fallen had no privileges when it came to Heaven. I could search the world for years and come up with nothing. It would be a waste of time trying, because he wouldn’t be on Earth. She’d have taken him somewhere I couldn’t go.
As a result, the past few weeks had been miserable. I was lost without both of them.
Maybe I was being selfish in coming to see Josh, especially since I wasn’t sure about my feelings for him. But maybe he’d be happy to see me, and I’d fall into his arms like I had when we’d first gotten together.
It seemed like so long ago that I’d defied The Council and given up everything for him. I liked him better when he wasn’t angry with me. But Josh had the right to be angry. I’d deserted him when he’d needed me the most. If only I could explain to him that it was out of necessity, not want. I didn’t want everything to happen the way it did. I might be an angel, but some things were out of my control.
I needed to apologize properly. Closure. That’s what I needed.
What I really wanted was to bring him home.
I clutched the piece of paper, trying to decide what to do. The thought of leaving crossed my mind, but I couldn’t. I had to know where we stood, if there was any chance for us at all. I’d given up so much for Josh, but somehow he’d come out with the raw end of the deal. I may have become fallen, but technically, he was dead.
My hand shook as I reached up to knock on the door. Get yourself together, Grace. I’d faced far worse things in my existence than a vampire with a bad temper. The wood scraped my knuckles as I knocked three times.
For a moment, I hoped he wasn’t home. But then I also hoped he was. Why was love so complicated? Did I even love him? I was about to knock again when the hinges creaked. I braced myself for Josh’s reaction.
He frowned and tried to close the door in my face. I stuck my foot in the gap and grimaced from the pain; it was a reminder of how strong he was since he’d become a vampire. It surprised me the door didn’t disintegrate under his touch.
It got to the point where I couldn’t take it and I pulled my foot out. Paint flecks rained onto the step when the door slammed.
If Josh thought I was going away that easily, he was mistaken.
I knocked again.
The door opened a crack. “What are you doing here? He doesn’t want to see you,” Charlotte said.
I could’ve asked her the same question.
Charlotte was the other reason we were in this mess. She’d lied to me, and she wasn’t who I’d thought she was. I’d become a fallen angel for her, to protect her, only she’d betrayed my trust by concealing the truth.
An angel in a vampire’s body—who’d have thought?
Jealousy bubbled inside me and I shoved it aside. There was nothing between Josh and Charlotte. She’d created him. She was watching out for him, but I hadn’t considered that they might be living together. I didn’t want them to be living together.
“I need to talk to Josh,” I said. “You can either open the door or I can make you.”
Charlotte pursed her lips and hesitated before opening the door all the way.
We had unfinished business, but I wasn’t here for that. Charlotte and I could sort out our differences at a later date, when we had lots of open space and no one around to get hurt.
I stepped over the threshold and into the terrace.
“He’s upstairs.” Charlotte gestured to the staircase in front of me and I set my foot on the bottom step. She didn’t move, standing in that statuesque pose I’d come to know so well.
“Why did you let her in?” Josh asked from the landing.
“She’s right.” Charlotte looked from Josh to me, and back again. “You two need to talk.”
Josh stared at us, his dark gaze resting on me. “You can go, Charlotte. I don’t need you.”
She sighed and narrowed her eyes. “I’ll be back in a couple of hours.”
I fixed my stare on Josh, the door clicking closed behind me. He walked away, hands shoved into his pockets.
The stairs groaned as I ascended. I went left and peered into the room at the end of the hall. Josh sat outside on the roof, leaning against the terrace wall. His shoulder covered the left side of the open window. He rested his forearms on his knees and stared at the blackened sky. His dark hair flopped over the side of his face and I wanted to go to him and run my fingers through it.
“What do you want?” he said, as I walked into the room.
How could I answer that? I didn’t know what I wanted. “To talk?”
“I said everything I had to say when I left.”
“Well, I didn’t,” I said.
Josh ducked his head inside the window. His gaze bore holes in me, and it hurt.
“I told you, Grace. I’m not ready to be near you until you sort out your issue with Seth.”
“My issue?”
“You can’t have us both.”
“I don’t have either of you! And I don’t know where Seth is. Angelica took him, in case you’ve forgotten. Where do I start looking?”
“You think I should know?” he said.
The volume of his voice made me fli
nch. There was a time when Josh would never have shouted at me, but that had changed when Charlotte turned him. I couldn’t blame him for being so angry. I’d be angry with me, too.
“I don’t want to fight, Josh.”
“Then why are you here?”
I hesitated, and then took a step forward. “I want to see if you’re okay.”
“Really? You came all this way to check up on me?” He climbed through the window with a grace he hadn’t possessed as a human, and stood in the centre of the room.
“You might not think it, but I care about you.”
“I told you I loved you.” Josh scowled and clenched his fists. “And you didn’t say it back.”
I fiddled with the ring on my right hand. Josh’s stare broke away from mine and focused on my fingers. I wore another ring, the one he’d given me, on my left middle finger. The sapphire was as blue as my eyes used to be before I fell.
“You put it on,” he said.
“Why wouldn’t I?”
“Why would you if you don’t love me?”
“You’re putting words in my mouth. I never said I don’t love you.”
“But you never said you did.”
“I …”
“Do you love me?”
I hesitated again. “It’s not as simple as that.”
“Give me a break.” Josh pushed past me and flew down the stairs.
With a deep breath, I followed. How was I going to fix this? It seemed as if everything was too broken to be put back together.
I went into the kitchen where Josh stood, leaning on the bench. His arms were stretched out in front of him and his head hung between them. I wanted to go to him, to wrap my arms around his waist and never let go.
“You’re still here,” he said.
“I don’t want to leave.”
“What about what I want? Doesn’t that count for anything?” Josh lifted his head and we stared at each other.
“I’m not leaving,” I said.
He went to the fridge and took out a plastic water bottle, but it wasn’t filled with water, and it wasn’t red cordial.
I raised my eyebrows. “The city has a store where you can buy blood?”
Josh laughed and took a swig. “Not exactly, but do you see any wild animals around here? Last time I checked they were all behind bars at the zoo. We’re not in the country, Grace. I can’t hunt, and I can’t eat the next person who happens to walk past.”
“You can’t do that in the country either.”
“You know what I mean.” He took another drink.
“At least you’re talking to me.” I attempted a smile, but it fell short.
“Who says I’m talking to you?”
“You’re talking to the blood then?”
“What do you want?” he asked.
I looked him straight in the eyes, but after a few seconds Josh dropped his gaze. He sighed and clenched his fists.
“I don’t know what I want,” I said.
“So you thought you’d come here and rub my face in it?”
I shook my head. “Rub your face in what?”
“I told you I loved you, Grace …”
I laughed, but it sounded hollow in my chest. “We had this conversation a moment ago upstairs. You can’t be angry because I never said it. You left. Do you know what that did to me?”
“You deserted me,” Josh said. “You pushed me away when I needed you. Do you think it’s easy being what I am? I never asked for this.” Josh grimaced. His lips pulled back from his teeth and he hissed as his fangs extended. “You decided this for me.”
“I thought I was saving you,” I whispered.
“I would have been better off dead.”
“Don’t say that.” I shook my head.
“I’m not Charlotte. I’m not pure like she is. The only reason I’m not out there, mauling every person I see, is because she’s here. Most of the time, I can’t control it. And pig’s blood is a sucky substitute.” Josh hurled the drink bottle across the room. It hit the wall, splattering it with the crimson liquid, before falling to the floor.
My chest tightened, and my heart ached, because everything he’d said was true. I did abandon him when he’d needed me, and I hated myself for it. I wished I could take everything back.
“I’m sorry,” I said.
“Sorry. You’re sorry? You took my life from me,” Josh said.
“I’ve told you this before: you would have died. I didn’t want you to die!”
Josh leaned against the bench and heaved a breath he didn’t need. “I think you should go.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Go!”
His voice flowed through me like a shockwave, vibrating my core until it hurt so much I thought I would explode into a million tiny pieces.
“I should never have come,” I whispered.
Josh raised his head and stared into my eyes. “No. You shouldn’t have.”
“I want to fix this,” I said. “I know you’re angry, and hurting. I am, too. But you have to believe me.”
Josh went to the back door and stared through the glass to the courtyard. “It doesn’t matter what I want. You have to be with me because you want to. Otherwise what’s the point?”
His black T-shirt stretched across his broad shoulders. I wanted to run my hands up his spine and feel the muscle beneath his skin. I took a couple of steps towards him, my heart beating in my ears.
“I don’t want what I did for you to be for nothing,” I said.
Josh’s shoulders shook, and my heart broke inside my chest.
When I reached him, I placed my hands on his back, running them up to his shoulders and down his arms. His skin was cold, but the familiar heat between us sparked. He turned and faced me, his cheeks stained with lines of blood tears. I rested my palms flat on his chest and Josh relaxed slightly under my touch.
“What are you doing?” he asked.
With one hand I reached up and wiped a tear away with my thumb, smearing blood under his eye.
“I’m so sorry I did this to you.”
Josh squeezed his eyes closed. “Sorry doesn’t change anything.”
He was right. But telling him I loved him wouldn’t change anything either.
I went to the kitchen and found a tea towel in the bottom drawer. After wetting it I returned to Josh, and he let me wash his tears. I avoided his stare and concentrated on what I was doing. If I looked at him, I was afraid he’d be able to see how scared I was.
He wanted me.
I’d always known he did, but did I want him? In that way?
Josh grabbed my wrist to stop me wiping his face. Still, I couldn’t look at him. He raised my chin with his finger, forcing me to stare into his eyes, and what I saw both excited and terrified me.
Sometimes I wished I didn’t have the ability to read minds. I’d never done what he wanted to do. I wasn’t sure of the consequences, if there would be any. Maybe it would be different because I was fallen. Maybe the rules didn’t apply to me anymore.
It wasn’t like I could fall again.
Josh leaned down and brushed my lips with his. I’d forgotten how gentle he could be. He let go of my wrist and the tea towel dropped to the floor. His hands pressed into my back, pulling me to him and closing the space between us. I locked my fingers behind his neck, and crushed my body to his.
Josh’s mind filled with thoughts that made me blush. I tried to block him out, but he was too close. Heat rose into my cheeks as he kissed me with more urgency. He flicked his tongue, exploring my mouth and making me moan. For a second, he pulled away, and losing the sensation of his mouth on mine was like losing a piece of me.
I curled my fingers into Josh’s hair, and stared into his eyes. He found the edge of my top and slipped his hands underneath, his cold fingers tracing their way up my spine.
Did I want this?
Would I let him go as far as he wanted to?
I decided to stop thinking. The intimacy is wh
at I’d missed since he’d left. And if I was selfish for wanting to feel something with him, then I didn’t care.
Maybe I didn’t have to tell him I loved him. Maybe I could show him.
I pulled Josh’s mouth back to mine, hungry for more.
“Grace,” Josh breathed.
“Don’t,” I said between kisses. “Don’t think about anything.”
He turned us around and pressed me against the glass doors, kissing me more deeply than he ever had before. When the image of his bed formed in his mind, I couldn’t deny what we both wanted. I surrounded us with my black mist and a second later we were in his room.
Josh pulled away and smiled, about to say something, but I pressed a finger to his lips before kissing him again. He fumbled with the button on my jeans, and then hooked his thumbs inside the waistband and the top of my panties. I helped him slide my clothes over my hips then I stepped out of them. He unbuckled his jeans, and they fell to the floor next to mine.
I’d never done this before, and my stomach rolled with nerves. I gripped Josh’s arms to stop my hands from shaking and stared into his eyes, focusing on his face.
I couldn’t look down. I was too afraid.
He pulled me close and guided me to the bed. We sat on the edge, our hands exploring each other. His touch was cold, but left trails of heat all over my body. I moulded my fingers around the hard muscles of his biceps, my palms burning against his cold skin. Josh grasped the hem of my top and I lifted my arms so he could pull it over my head.
His gaze wandered over my body, stopping at my chest, inspecting my black lace bra. He placed his hand over my heart, then ran his fingers up to my collarbone. His thumb caressed my neck and I tilted my head, my skin tingling beneath his touch.
Josh lifted me onto his lap and I stifled a surprised cry, feeling sensations in parts of my body I never knew existed. He gripped my hips and gently guided me into position. I didn’t take my gaze from his; I was afraid that if I did I’d break the magic between us.
When he lowered me onto him it hurt, but I couldn’t compare it to a cut or a wound. It was like pressure, as if our souls were attempting to combine, pushing against opposite sides of an invisible wall we wanted to come crashing down.
He touched every inch of my skin, as if he couldn’t get enough. I reached behind my back and unclipped my bra, letting it fall to the floor with the rest of our clothes. Josh’s fangs extended and he hissed. I rested my palm on his cheek and touched the tip of one fang with my thumb. Josh moaned and closed his eyes. I took his T-shirt off and gently pushed on his chest. He fell onto the bed, staring up at me with intense eyes.
Losing It: A Collection of VCards Page 9