by Syndi Powell
He‘d rather keep his job. Instead, he smiled. “I’ll consider it.”
* * *
WITH DINNER THEN the cutting of the cake, Will didn’t get a chance to dance with Suzy until much later. But he took advantage of her feeling sentimental to pull her out onto the dance floor. A fast song had just ended, and a slow ballad replaced it. He held Suzy tight to him. “How are you really doing, Suzy?”
She kept her gaze on everyone but him as she shrugged. “Okay, I guess.”
“You’re staying with Presley?”
“Since you kicked me out of my home, yes.”
“Your safety was more important than...” He swallowed hard. “More important than our friendship or my feelings toward you.”
She opened her mouth then tried to walk away. Instead, he gripped her hand and kept her close to him. She looked up at him. “Your feelings? You want to talk about those? Because I can tell you what it felt like to be ripped away from everything I knew.”
“Only temporarily.”
She glanced down at her feet. “I can’t afford to fix it. So it could be more permanent than you think.”
He wanted to tell her what he’d done. But it wasn’t the right time. She had to learn to trust him first. “So what will you do?”
“I don’t know.”
“We can fix this. I know we can.”
She let go of his hand and stopped moving despite his efforts to keep dancing. “I’m not something you can fix, Will.”
She stepped back but he caught her hand in his. “I know, Suzy. But I do want to make things better. As for making real changes, I’ve realized only you can do that. Though, I can be there for you. I can help.”
“I don’t need your help, Will. Good night.”
Then she was walking off the dance floor, leaving him alone. And that wasn’t something he wanted to be.
CHAPTER TWELVE
STANDING BEFORE THE MIRROR, Suzy carefully pushed the gold hoop through her earlobe. Except for Rick and Lizzie’s wedding, she couldn’t remember the last time she’d worn earrings or had an occasion to wear them. Mama’s funeral maybe? And now she’d worn them twice in one week. She turned her head in the other direction and put in the matching hoop. She checked her reflection. Ruffled her curls a little then added a touch of hairspray.
A knock on the bedroom door, and Pres asked, “Almost ready?” She entered the room and did a spin, showing off her look.
Suzy dabbed some clear lip gloss on then pursed her lips. “We’re not putting too much into this one night, are we?”
“Nah, not us.” Pres chuckled. “Besides it’s just dinner at your favorite restaurant.”
“My favorite? You mean, yours.” Suzy turned and pressed a hand against her abdomen. She’d put on her skinny jeans but they felt a little tight. “Maybe I should change.”
“Again? This is your third outfit.”
“Fourth.” She opened the suitcase and glanced inside. She hated living out of it, but her current housing situation was temporary. Wasn’t it? “Didn’t I pack my stretchy jeans?”
“Suze, relax. We’re just having some dinner. Totally low key.”
Suzy looked over at her and nodded. “I know. I’m just not in the mood.”
“What? To eat? Please.” Pres put her arm around her. “Let’s just go now so we can get a good table.” She nudged Suzy with her hip. “And a cute waiter.”
“Maybe we could order in. Watch a movie or something.”
“Nice try. We’re going out, so get your purse and let’s go.” Pres walked across the room towards the door. “I’ll meet you downstairs in five minutes. And if you’re not there, I will come up here and drag you out myself.”
“Empty threats.” Suzy grinned. “I’ll be down there. I promise.”
“Good. Because you need this.”
Suzy rechecked her look. This would have to be good enough. She bent to reach for her purse then coughed. But first things first, she’d have to change out of these tight jeans.
* * *
THE DRIVE TO the Mexican restaurant took only twenty minutes. As she and Pres were about to go in, her friend said, “Looks like we’re not the only ones to find this place.” Through the glass door, they could see the place was packed.
Suzy frowned. Not only wasn’t she in the mood to go out, she really didn’t want to have to deal with a crowd of people. She wanted to be in bed with the covers over her. “Maybe we could find somewhere more quiet.”
“I’ve been looking forward to this margarita all week.”
Pres strode into the restaurant. Suzy waited a moment then took a deep breath and opened the door. She could do this.
Pres was already walking back towards her, shaking her head. “Well, you win. They’re closed for a private party.”
“So now what? We go home?”
Pres shook her head even more. “I didn’t get all dressed up just to go home and sit in front of the television. We’ll find another place. I’m getting my margarita.”
They drove towards Traverse City where they would have more choices. Suzy fiddled with the radio stations, trying to find a song to pull her out of this funk. She settled on a current hit and shifted back in her seat. “We could get some Chinese takeout.”
“No way.” Pres glanced at her then back to the road. “We are going out and enjoying ourselves. Don’t you think it’s time?”
They fell silent, listening to the radio which had changed to a song that had been popular when they’d been in college. Pres turned up the volume. “Now this is what I’m talking about.”
Suzy leaned back into the headrest. “Do you remember the night we snuck up on to the dorm roof and made our wish list for the perfect life?” Pres, Suzy and another roommate had lay on the roof and watched the stars while dreaming of their futures. It had been wonderful. But now it felt so long ago to Suzy. Another lifetime. “Mama called the next month and asked me to come home. To go to school near her. And that was the end of it.”
“You talk like your life is over.”
“The problem is that it never started.” Suzy looked out the window at the passing landscape. “She ended my dreams of a career, like yours. Of us opening a veterinary office together.” She blinked back tears. “I never wanted something so bad. I still think of it.”
“Our lives turned out different. That’s all.” Pres reached out and patted Suzy’s hand. “But we can still dream. You have a job that you love, right?”
“Do I? I don’t know anymore.” She got out a tissue to dry her eyes. “She didn’t want me to leave her like my dad did. Didn’t matter if I had dreams of my own. It was all about her.” She gave a low laugh. “She’s dead, and it still is. All about her. Her stuff. And her house.”
“It doesn’t have to be.” Pres glanced behind her then pulled over onto the shoulder. She faced Suzy. “You don’t have to let her decide your future anymore. You’re the one in control.”
Pres was a good friend, but she couldn’t understand. “She still has a hold on me.”
“Only if you let her.” Pres took her hand. “I know she was your mom, and you love her. But you can live your own life now. Make your own choices.”
“What if I don’t know how?”
“Then you’ll learn.”
* * *
WILL FROWNED AT the empty nurses’ station. Suzy still wasn’t back from her leave, and it made the seniors’ home seem less warm. Less complete.
He knocked on Ma’s door before opening it and sticking his head inside. “You decent, Ma?”
“Do you think I’m entertaining gentleman callers?” Ma laughed and shook her head. “Carol and I were just talking about my next chemo.”
“Tomorrow, right?” Was it time already for another? Would this be the on
e that cured his mom? Or killed her? No, he had to think positively. Focus on the healing. “The sooner the better. Then you can come home.”
Ma smiled. “Home.”
Carol stood and kissed their mother’s cheek. “I’ll head out. Think I need a long bubble bath and a glass of wine before I drive back home tomorrow.”
“Sounds heavenly.” They kissed again. “Lovey.”
Carol gave Will a nod then left them. He turned to Ma. “She’s still ticked off at me.”
“She’s angry with the world, not just you.” Ma patted the bed beside her. “Tell me about your day.”
“Nothing to tell. I shuffled paperwork and scheduled a site inspection.” He shrugged. “Typical day.”
“Yet you love it.”
He did. He’d always enjoyed taking things apart and putting them back together. And with this job, he loved looking at problems and finding solutions. Who knows what would happen if he lost the job to budget cuts? And then he understood what Suzy had felt when he’d kicked her out of her home. Despite the mess and chaos, it was home. Comfortable and familiar. And having it taken from her had pushed her into an unknown. One caused by him.
He closed his eyes, felt a hand on his cheek and opened them again. “What is it, son?”
“I love her.” He shook his head. “How? When did that happen?”
Ma grinned. “It’s been happening for some time now. I’m just glad you finally realized it.”
He groaned and rubbed his face with his hands. Loved her. What was he supposed to do now? He’d ruined her life, but tried to fix it. Only to discover that she needed to fix it herself. So he couldn’t exactly go to her and offer her his heart? She’d crush it and hand it back.
Wouldn’t she?
“I don’t know what to do.”
“Did I ever tell you about how I knew I loved your father?” Ma’s face softened. “He was a Marine. All tough and emotionless. And strong. So strong. But he had a soft spot for animals.” She laughed at Will’s expression. “He’d tell you that we had our cats because I wanted them, but the truth was that he chose them. Named them. Fed and watered them. They slept on his side of the bed, not mine.”
She waved her hands. “But I’m getting ahead of myself. It was our third date, and we had walked to the movies. When it ended, it was pouring rain. We stayed under the marquee, waiting for it to stop when your father heard a soft mewling.” She chuckled and seemed to see the scene playing again just outside her window. “A cat was caught in a sewer drain, and your father was afraid that it would drown if he didn’t get it out quickly. So he removed the sewer grate and pulled her free. Took off his coat and wrapped her in it to get her warm.”
She looked at him. “That was when I knew that I loved him. This gruff man with a huge heart. He brought her over to where I stood and handed her to me. Told me to keep her. That I’d know what to do next.”
“And did you?”
“I kissed him and told him I’d love him until the day I died.” She touched her chest. “And I’ve kept that promise all these years.”
“When did he tell you he loved you?”
“The day he proposed. Your father wasn’t romantic by any means, but I knew he’d take care of me.”
“That’s not the man I remember. He was never sentimental around me.”
Ma nodded. “I wish you could have had the father I knew he could have been. For whatever reason, he was afraid to show how much he cared.” She touched his hand, squeezed it tightly. “You don’t have to be like him.”
“I know.” But he wasn’t sure if he could completely escape from the genetic pull to become his father.
“If you love her, tell her. Don’t let something like that pass you by.”
He agreed. He couldn’t let her go. She may not love him the same way. At least not yet. But he could prove it. Would show her how much she meant to him.
* * *
THE BAKERY SMELLED delicious as Suzy stepped inside the Sweetheart. Pres had done so much for her, so she thought she’d reward her friend with a special treat. She walked to the glass case and searched the rows of cookies. Mrs. Sweet came over and smiled at her. “Finding what you want?”
Suzy looked up at the older woman who could have played Mrs. Claus at any time of year. She sighed. “It all looks so good.”
“What’s the occasion?”
“Thank you for a friend.” Suzy bit her lip and considered the baklava. “She’s more a dark chocolate kind of girl. What would you recommend?”
Mrs. Sweet motioned for Suzy to join her at another case. The baker took out a small chocolate cake decorated with fresh raspberries and set it on the counter. “This would be my first choice. Thin layers of chocolate cake with raspberry mousse sandwiched between them. Dark chocolate ganache over it.”
“Sold.” Suzy pulled out her wallet. “You had me at cake.”
Mrs. Sweet laughed as she placed the cake into a box then tied it with string. She took the package with her to the cash register. “I hope your friend likes it.”
“Oh she will.” Suzy handed her a credit card. She leaned against the counter. “Where’s Megs? I haven’t seen her lately.”
“In the back, she’s experimenting with a new recipe.” Mrs. Sweet smiled, the pride showing in her face. “She’s about ready to take over the business from me.”
“Are you retiring? I can’t imagine the Sweetheart without you.”
Mrs. Sweet scoffed. “Not retiring, just stepping down so that Megan can take over. It’s time.”
“She’s certainly learned from the best. And Kelly?”
Mrs. Sweet lit up. “Still in Nashville, trying to become a star. She only needs some time and then we’ll be hearing her sing on the radio.”
Suzy smiled and took her credit card back and tucked it into her wallet. “Well, some dreams take longer to find.” She accepted the bakery box. “Thanks, Mrs. Sweet.”
“How’s the house coming?”
Suzy fought to keep the smile on her face. “It’s at a standstill for the moment. A work in progress.”
“Good luck. And if you need any help...”
Suzy held up the box. “This is a good start. Thanks.”
She left the bakery and started down Main Street where she’d parked her car. A woman passed her, and Suzy recognized the familiar red jacket, the long wavy blond hair and large form.
Mama.
She veered from the direction of her car and followed the woman. It couldn’t be, but there was something recognizable about the woman. She had to hurry to keep with her. When the woman paused at the corner before crossing Main, Suzy kept her distance and watched her. She felt her body warm and her face flush, the prickling heat making her skin tingle. Mama was dead, but here she was walking in downtown Lake Mildred and waiting at a street corner.
The light changed, and the woman crossed the street. Suzy continued to follow her as she headed for Roxy’s department store. She pushed through the front door, and Suzy rushed to touch the woman’s arm. She turned to look at Suzy.
Oh. Not Mama.
Of course, not Mama. Because her mother was dead. She wasn’t coming back. The joy she’d been feeling crumbled. “Sorry. I thought you were someone else.”
The woman shook her head and continued into the department store. Suzy stared after her. She’d looked like Mama. Wore her red jacket. For a few seconds, she wanted to believe her mother had returned.
She stared down at the bakery box and saw that the string had cut into her hand. Breathe in, breathe out. Time to return to reality. She began to walk back to her car, but heard someone calling her name. She turned and spotted Tori.
Will’s sister smiled and pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. “Hey, Suzy. How are you doing?”
Suzy opened her mou
th, but didn’t know how to answer. I thought I saw my dead mother. Your brother ruined my life. I think I’m going crazy? Nah, none of those worked. Instead, she shrugged. “Fine. I’m heading over to the hospital later to see your mom.”
“Yes. Her chemo.” Tori crossed her arms just below where her name tag advertised her place of employment. She glanced back at the department store. “I saw you through the front window and thought I’d come and say hi. I haven’t seen you since...”
Since that horrible day when she’d lost Mama’s house. “Right.” She gestured at the cake box in her hand. “Well, I gotta go.”
Tori nodded, as if this meeting wasn’t more awkward than it was. “Yeah, I have to get back.” She took a few steps then turned around. “If you need anything, I can always help.”
Everyone seemed to want to help, but what use was it when you didn’t know what you wanted in the first place? She gave a faint smile. “Thanks, Tori. I’ll keep that in mind.”
Tori smiled then walked back into Roxy’s.
Suzy walked back to the corner then to her car. She’d drop off the cake at Presley’s then go to the hospital. She had a date with Mrs. Stone.
* * *
SUZY PULLED THE edges of her cardigan together as she walked down one corridor then another to the chemotherapy treatment room at the hospital. She signed in and indicated who she was there to visit with. A few minutes later, a nurse in bright pink scrubs showed her to where Mrs. Stone sat in a lounge chair, already hooked up to an IV. She smiled from ear to ear when she noticed her. “I wondered if you’d come see me today.”
“We had a date, right?” Suzy brought a stool on wheels closer to her chair and placed the orange gift bag she’d been carrying on the floor at her feet before giving the older woman a hug. “Nervous?”
Mrs. Stone shook her head, but her eyes told a different story. “I’m a Stone. Didn’t you hear we don’t get nervous?”
Right. Suzy glanced around the room. “Is your daughter Carol still in town?”
“She’s leaving today.” Mrs. Stone frowned and picked at the blanket that covered her lap. “I wish she’d stay, but she’s got to go back to work.”