One of my duties was to inspect a book when a customer returned it. To make sure any turned down pages were placed back or else to remove the bookmarks which ranged from the disgusting to the comical.
Miss Boyd still retold the story of one find almost twenty years earlier when a compromising letter was returned with a book. The lady had almost certainly hidden it from her husband and had forgotten about it. Although Connie knew who she was, nothing was ever said and the woman never appeared in the shop again.
I loved my job. There was a magical mixture of smells from the newspapers, snuff, cigarettes and the aroma of boiled sweets. The paperboy was already in the shop when I darted in – a thin gangly-looking lad of thirteen with a thin white pinched face and red-raw knees. He didn’t quite fall over with the weight of his bag but it was touch-and-go some mornings when he staggered out with this heavy satchel over his shoulder. I felt sorry for him. He lived with his widowed mother and his paper-round pittance helped her eke out the measly wage she earned by washing stairs.
Connie called out after him, ‘You’ll soon be needing long trousers, Davie.’
He muttered something about saving up for them. Poor soul, I thought.
The shop soon filled up with customers – a lucky few on their way to work and the unlucky jobless majority just popping in for a paper or some other essential.
I heard laughter and I turned around. It was Edith, Amy and Sylvia. Three young friends on their way to the spinning sheds at Hillside Jute Mills further down the Hilltown. I liked them. Barely fifteen years old, they were full of life and laughter in spite of their long hard day in the mill.
‘Hurry up and serve us, Ann, or we’ll be late again. We don’t want to get quartered again as this will be our second time this week,’ said Sylvia, laughing. ‘At this rate, we’ll not have any wages to pick up. Give me five Woodbines and two ounces of clove balls for Edith. She doesn’t smoke like Amy and me and it’ll be the death of her. Everybody knows that smoking is good for you.’ She gave Edith a pitying look. ‘I mean you’re not grown-up unless you smoke.’
Edith was unabashed – she just liked her sweeties. I could hear their laughter as they ran off down the hill and I smiled at their pure pleasure in life.
I was kept busy until dinner-time but, during one quiet spell, my thoughts returned to my earlier uneasiness.
‘Half an ounce of Kendal Brown snuff, Ann.’
I blinked at old Mrs Halliday who was standing waiting patiently at the counter. ‘Eh was a weaver in my young days and you needed snuff to clear out your nasal passages.’
I smiled to myself as I weighed out the snuff on the tiny scales. It was a story she told me every time she came into the shop. It was the same with her choice of book from the lending library.
‘Now, let’s see what you’ve got for me this time.’ She put on a pair of tiny, wire-framed spectacles and scanned the shelves. ‘Now, let’s see.’
After a few minutes she pulled a volume from the shelf. ‘Right then, Ann, I’ll have another detective story. I just love a good murder mystery. It makes you appreciate the fact that you’re still alive and kicking.’
For a brief moment, I recalled how dear Mrs Barrie had also loved a good murder mystery in spite of owning a super library of leather-bound books.
I was writing Mrs Halliday’s name in the ledger when the doorbell gave a loud metallic ping and Maddie burst in, almost taking the door off its hinges. Her face was red with the cold and she had tears in her eyes.
Mrs Halliday didn’t seem to notice as she went out but I had the most awful feeling of foreboding that had nothing to do with Dad Ryan’s death.
‘Oh, Ann, I got Danny’s letter about his grandad and I’m so sorry to hear it.’ She stopped and wiped her eyes. ‘I went down to Lipton’s shop this morning because I have a few hours off and Danny told me the engagement was off.’ Tears were now rolling down her cheeks. ‘He says it’s better we don’t get married. What happened at Lochee last night? He won’t tell me.’
I gasped so loud that Connie popped her head around the door of the back shop – a tiny space only big enough to house a chair and a gas ring. When she saw Maddie, she nodded and ducked back again behind the door to finish her cup of tea.
Maddie grasped my arm in her agitation. ‘I’m telling you that Danny has broken our engagement, Ann.’
Although alarmed by this news and her manner, I tried to keep calm. ‘You must have misunderstood him, Maddie. Danny is besotted by you and he would never hurt you like this.’
Her large blue eyes were still wet with tears. ‘But it’s true. I have three hours off today and I went to Lipton’s shop to see if Danny would meet me at his dinner break but he looked so different somehow when he walked me to the door. Then he told me that he was releasing me from the engagement and he wouldn’t see me again.’ She wiped her wet cheeks with a small sodden handkerchief. ‘I tried to speak to him but he says his mind is made up and that’s that. What does he mean, Ann?’
She turned her tearful face away when a customer came in. The woman’s mournful expression matched my own worried mood. ‘Terrible news about the King is it no’?’
I nodded bleakly. This had been the main topic of conversation since his death.
‘I’ll have a single cigarette, Ann.’
I handed over the cigarette from the box of fifty which lay under the counter. Connie had loads of customers like this one who were too hard up to buy five cigarettes so she kept them supplied with whatever amount they could afford – sometimes that was just a single purchase like this one.
I turned back to Maddie. She seemed to think I could work miracles with Danny but I was as much in the dark as she was. I told her this but I added, ‘Dad was in a strange mood this morning. Perhaps they’ve both had too much to drink last night.’ Although I was saying the words, I wasn’t believing them. I knew Dad could maybe cast aside a lady-love but not Danny.
Maddie pulled on her gloves. ‘I’ve got to get back to the infirmary, Ann, and I’ve no more time off this week except for a few hours on Sunday afternoon.’
‘Look, Maddie,’ I said, with more conviction than I felt, ‘I’ll try and see Danny tonight and get this horrible mess sorted out – one way or another.’
As she reached the door, she turned. ‘It wouldn’t be Minnie who’s caused this ending, Ann, would it?’
I was shocked. Minnie was an old school friend of Danny and it was true that he had taken her to the pictures over a period of a few weeks but that had been a few years ago. Minnie was now married to one of Lipton’s assistant managers and she now had a little boy.
Maddie saw my shocked expression. ‘Well, her husband is still living in Clydebank and she’s back in Dundee. According to Bella, the rumour is that they’ve separated.’
Blast Bella, I thought, with her meddling gossip and her easy way with passing on any juicy titbit. I had also heard this rumour but I didn’t think for one moment that Minehaha, as I called Minnie because of her resemblance to an Indian maiden, was behind this mystery.
I didn’t have a plan in mind that afternoon as I set off for Granny’s house except I didn’t want her to hear of this change of heart on Danny’s part. I knew she would be just as shocked as I was and just as much in the dark.
As it turned out, it was a wasted journey because Lily wanted to stay. She had been invited to have her tea in her friend’s house and I didn’t have the heart to disappoint her.
I made my way homeward and I was caught in a heavy sleety shower that left my coat and shoes sodden. I planned to tackle Dad when he came home but the problem was Connie. She needed me in the shop for an extra hour at teatime so I had no choice but to leave him a note saying the meal would be a little later than usual.
After a hectic hour at the shop, I made my way wearily homeward. My note was still propped up on the mantelpiece. Dad had obviously seen it because he had added a small pencilled message. ‘I’ll get my tea at Rosie’s. See you later.’
I was mad. Although he often ate his tea with Rosie and her mother Alice, I was desperate to tackle him tonight. Damn. It was almost as if he was dodging me. Without taking my coat off I headed for the Westport and Danny.
Hattie answered the door. She looked totally surprised because I hardly ever visited her at home. ‘Ann, is there something wrong?’ She sounded worried.
I tried to keep a cheery expression in spite of all this worry. I smiled. ‘No, Hattie, I just wanted to see Danny. Is he here?’
She shook her head. ‘No, I expect he’s at Lochee but come in.’
I didn’t really want to socialise at that moment but I moved towards her tiny living room which was immaculate – but then it always was. The furniture was well chosen and good quality. There was a lovely smell of lavender and beeswax polish.
When she saw me sniffing, she pointed to the large bowl on the sideboard which was filled with dried flower heads. ‘Mrs Pringle always gathers her flowers in the summer and dries them. I gathered all the lavender heads and they make a lovely perfume for the house.’ She sniffed the bowl with her eyes closed. ‘It brings back all the summer smells in winter.’
Not for the first time was I struck by her genteel, refined nature. She was so different from the rest of the family.
‘I’ll make some tea,’ she said as she headed towards the small cupboard area which was barely large enough to hold the gas cooker and a tiny sink with a well-scrubbed draining board.
I sat down in a lovely squashy chair by the side of the brightly burning fire. The wireless was on but she switched it off when she appeared with the tea tray which held two dainty china cups and saucers and a small plate with biscuits. I couldn’t help but compare it to Kit’s house with its bare basics and tiny fire.
‘I didn’t really want Danny to go to Lochee tonight but I suppose it is his grandad who’s died and not some obscure member of that family.’ She put down her cup and compressed her lips into a disapproving frown. ‘Mind you, I expect they act like that with any death in their family. I mean look at that awful business last night. I ask you, Ann, it’s almost inhuman to sit up all night with a dead body.’
I stopped her because I had heard all this tirade before. ‘Hattie, did Danny say anything about last night?’
She almost choked on her biscuit. ‘Say anything?’
‘Yes. Did he say anything about the wake?’
She gave this a moment’s thought. ‘No, although I was glad when he came in about four o’clock. I was still awake and feeling worried about that stupid custom but he went off to work this morning and I went to my work at the Pringles’ house as usual. When I got back he wasn’t here so I just assumed he had gone to Lochee.’
I tried to look nonchalant. ‘When does he normally get back from Lochee?’
By now she was suspicious. ‘Look, Ann, what’s this all about?’
I knew I couldn’t mention anything to her – at least not until I had spoken to Danny – but I also didn’t want to lie to her. If she knew the real reason for my visit, then she would have a fit of hysterics. She was so pleased when the engagement was announced because she thought Maddie was a real catch for her Danny. Now, if she even guessed the engagement was off … well, it didn’t bear thinking about.
‘Oh, it’s just a message from Maddie,’ I said innocently. ‘She came into the shop this morning and asked me to pass on something to him.’ It was almost true I told myself.
Her face cleared. ‘Oh, I see. Well, just tell me the message and I’ll pass it on.’
Oh my God, I thought. I stuttered a bit. ‘It’s just … it’s just that she’s sorry about Dad Ryan and she won’t be able to get off for the funeral. That’s all,’ I lied.
‘Well, I’ll pass it on and you’ll see him tomorrow at the funeral.’ She made a wry face. ‘Actually I wish I didn’t have to go but I suppose it’s expected of me. I hate funerals as they are so depressing.’ She refilled my cup and offered another biscuit.
There was nothing I could do but eat up then try to make my escape as soon as possible.
As I stepped into the street, the cold sleety showers had died away and it was a bright frosty night with a star-studded sky. Still, I didn’t have time to admire the sky’s glory because my mind was in a turmoil. Danny’s behaviour was so out of character that it left me stunned and I couldn’t see a way forward. All Maddie’s dreams looked dead but I still couldn’t believe it. It had to be a silly misunderstanding but where were the main players in this drama? Both missing.
For a brief moment, I thought of going to Lochee. As I passed the tramcar waiting to pick up its motley quota of passengers, its windows glowed in the frosty darkness. I walked away from this temptation, determined to tackle Dad as soon as I got home but, to my dismay and alarm, he was already in his bed – an unheard-of state of affairs in our house because he normally retired to his small back room around eleven o’clock or sometimes even midnight. For him to be in his bed by ten o’clock was a first.
I knew then there was something serious going on but, apart from marching into his room and shaking it out of him, there was nothing I could do. Tomorrow, I promised, tomorrow neither Dad nor Danny would escape. After the funeral I was going to get to the bottom of this mystery. I fell asleep with this plan in mind – a plan that was made all the more resolute by the sight of his furtive look as he dashed out through the door after a meagre breakfast.
I had arranged with Connie to have time off for the burial at Balgay cemetery but not for the Mass in Kit’s house. I was feeling ill and tired and my sleep had been filled with distorted dreams. I shivered in the cold morning air.
The customers were also shivering, their breath escaping in long streamers of white vapour as they came through the door.
‘There’s snow in the air,’ was the favourite saying that morning and I hoped it wasn’t true.
The snow started falling about nine o’clock and the streets were soon covered with a fine white powder. Small children were rolling in this with excited whoops of glee. What a day for a funeral, I thought, wondering if the weather would be as wintry for the King’s funeral.
The scene at Balgay was depressing. The snow fell from a grey leaden sky and it was so cold that I soon lost all feeling in my fingers and toes. I looked over to where Danny was standing beside his aunts and uncles. He moved slightly and I saw Ma Ryan. She was dressed in a thick, old-fashioned-looking coat and she wore a pair of stout black boots that had seen better days but were still sturdy.
Hattie stood beside her. Looking smart in a fur-collared black coat and really fashionable suede bootees. These two stood out because, unlike the rest of family with their red-rimmed eyes, Ma looked composed while Hattie looked impassive. Danny’s face was a chalky-white blur but his red hair was as bright as ever.
It was a large funeral with most of the men from the community turning out to mourn an old neighbour. They stood in their ill-fitting jackets and coats, holding their cloth caps in careworn hands. Their heads were bowed, either in silent prayer or in an effort to escape the relentless snowflakes.
I wondered if Dad had managed to get a few hours off from his work and I peered into the crowd. He was standing with Maddie’s Dad, Mr Pringle, and I was so pleased he had managed to come. As for Mr Pringle, I knew the Ryan family would appreciate his appearance. I knew Dad would make his escape as soon as the graveside service was over – not like the majority of men here who were unemployed and for whom this day was like hundreds of others in their lives. Unlike Dad, they didn’t have a job to go back to. Once again, I said a silent thank you to Mr Pringle for all his help in finding this job for him at his brother’s warehouse.
Balgay cemetery was now a familiar place to me as Lily and I would come here regularly to put flowers on Mum’s grave – a resting place that had now been made more personal by the addition of a small granite headstone, which had been my first purchase with my legacy from the dear Mrs Barrie.
As the priest’s voice carried ove
r the heads of the mourners, my mind went back to my days at the Ferry. How happy I had been in the company of Mrs Barrie but the horrible Miss Hood had made my life such a misery. I wondered if she was still in hospital – or the asylum as most folk referred to it.
In my mind, I also went over the speech I was going to deliver to Danny, rehearsing every word. I intended to tackle him as soon as we reached Kit’s house.
Now the service was over and we made our melancholy way back to Lochee. The men all refused the offer of hospitality. ‘You’ll have enough to feed without us,’ was the general tone.
Once again, Kit had put on the best spread the family could afford under their straightened circumstances. A large fire burned in the grate, tended by young Kathleen who kept adding coal to it in between serving the tea.
We all huddled around its warmth and the hot tea was a blessing, helping to erase the chill from our bones. I sat beside Hattie but Danny was huddled in the far corner with Kit’s husband.
I went over. ‘Hullo, Danny, I think you’re dodging me.’ It was said teasingly but he gave me such a haunted look that my heart grew cold with worry. Something was far wrong and, at that moment, I didn’t think there was much help I could give him or Maddie. This anguish, whatever it was, went deep and it showed. His eyes, normally so bright, were now blank and if he hadn’t been standing, I would have sworn he was dead.
‘Danny, I’ll walk back home with you or we can get a tramcar.’ I went to put my arm through his but he shrank back like some trapped animal. He didn’t answer or even look at me.
Towards a Dark Horizon Page 3