by Trudi Jaye
Milton looked up slowly. He looked beaten down, weary. It was an expression Garth recognized from the days after his mother died, when his father had given up. His chest contracted and his breath seemed to get stuck in his throat. His father wasn’t going to be able to handle this. He’d completely lost it back then, and it was going to happen all over again.
But then Milton shook his head slightly and the look passed. His expression opened up again, and Garth let out a breath.
“What do you want to know, son?”
Garth glanced up at Maddy, and she nodded encouragingly. “Tell me about Mom. Something good about her that you remember.”
Milton blinked and then sighed. “You don’t make it easy on me, do you, boy?”
Garth just waited, not saying a word.
“She was my life. My everything. And when we had you, it made my life so bright and wonderful it was like I was experiencing starlight on a daily basis.” He sighed. “She had beautiful long blond hair that she used to wear in a thick plait down her back.”
Maddy cleared her throat. “What about an event, something you did together?”
Milton looked off into the distance. “We did a family show. She wasn’t a clown—it wasn’t her thing—but she agreed to do a show, just the three of us. You remember, Garth?”
Garth nodded. He remembered very well. It was one of his favorite memories of his mother. Dressed up to the nines in the clown outfit at rehearsal, laughing so hard she couldn’t speak.
“She worked so hard to make sure she got it right. And she did. We all did. It was one of the best shows we’d ever done.” Milton’s face fell. “I was so proud of her. She was the greatest joy in my life.”
Garth nodded, glancing over at Maddy. “But then you lost her, Dad. And you fell apart. Your whole life was destroyed.”
His father shook his head straightaway. “Oh, son, whatever happened, whatever I’ve done, it was worth it. To love your mother, even for our short time together, it was all worth it.”
CHAPTER TWENTY
Garth rocked back on his chair. It surprised him to hear the passion in his father’s voice. He’d never thought it was worth it. His father had been a broken man for the last twelve years, since his wife’s death.
“I don’t believe you,” he said. “You don’t remember what it was like.”
Milton looked at Garth with pity in his eyes. “Garth, I do remember. And I’m sorry. I’m sorry I wasn’t a good father to you. You’d lost your mother, and I acted like a spoilt brat. Abacus was right to be angry with me. But I don’t regret loving your mother. My life is richer for having known her. And she gave me you.” Tears started to slowly drip from Milton’s lined eyes. He reached out and grabbed Garth’s hand. “I’m sorry, boy.”
Garth couldn’t speak for a moment. He didn’t understand what was happening. Suddenly, his father was back, saying all the things he’d wished he would say when he was a kid. It didn’t make sense.
He took a deep breath and nodded at his father. “It’s okay, Dad. I made it through.”
“Now, what can you do about getting me out of here? I want to go home.”
Garth looked over at Maddy, who shrugged.
“It’s a voluntary treatment facility,” she said, glancing at Milton. “But I would suggest perhaps you stay here an extra night, just to get your bearings before heading home. It can be a difficult transition at the best of times.”
Milton’s face fell and his eyes filled with moisture.
Garth’s chest contracted. “It’s okay, Dad. You can come home with me if you want,” he said before he could think too much about the consequences. “I’ve got a house guest, but he’s a great kid. You’ll like him.”
Garth turned to Maddy. “What do I need to do to make it happen?”
Maddy just watched them both for a moment. She sighed. “Come with me and we can sort it out.”
“Back soon, Dad.” Garth stood and put his hand on his father’s shoulder.
Milton nodded, his eyes wide on his pale, lined face.
***
Maddy couldn’t stop the turmoil running around in her head. Milton’s recovery made no sense. She’d been working with him for more than a month now, and she hadn’t seen any signs of this miraculous recovery before today. What was going on?
It did fit with her observations that Milton’s Alzheimer’s didn’t follow the normal profile. But she didn’t know what that meant for Garth or his father. Would Milton suddenly regress back into his memory loss? If that did happen, would it be a slow process or would it happen in seconds?
It was hard to know.
“Is it safe to take him home?” Garth asked her quietly as he walked beside her down the wide hallway.
She stopped and turned to face him. She wanted to take him in her arms, to soothe away the pain she could sense despite his dark glasses. “I honestly don’t know, Garth,” she said instead. “I’m not sure taking him home tonight is the best idea.” She glanced away.
“I can’t say no to him, Maddy. Not after what he’s been through.”
His tone was bleak, and Maddy flicked her gaze back to him. “None of this is your fault, Garth. Don’t forget that.”
“He’s lost all these years. He doesn’t remember a thing. What does that mean? How am I supposed to feel?” He seemed to forget he’d been putting distance between them and looked down at her with an imploring expression.
“However you feel is okay, Garth. Just remember you didn’t make him lose his memory. You’re not responsible.”
He took off his dark glasses and rubbed his eyes, seeming to forget the reason he wore them. Maddy stared into his all-black eyes and a shiver ran down her spine. There was something so exotic and mysterious about him.
She moved closer and put a hand on his arm. “If his condition changes, you can always bring him back. Just think of this as a weekend visit. We do those all the time. And I can come out tonight and check on him… if you like.”
Garth nodded. He looked down at her, his sunglasses in his hand and his turbulent emotions swirling in the depths of his dark eyes. Somehow in that moment, Maddy knew what had happened between them hadn’t been a one-night stand. He’d felt it just as much as she had.
She vowed to find out what made him back away before he disappeared and she lost him forever.
***
Hugo smiled, the muscles feeling tight in his face. A rush of triumph flashed through his chest. Across the road, Simon used his crutches to hobble into the doctor’s office. Once he’d found the right office, it had been a simple matter to charm the nurse into giving him the day and time of Simon’s next appointment.
Hugo dragged one hand through his now-brown hair, feeling the rough texture of the drugstore dye he’d had to put through it. It made him angry just thinking about it. He loved his signature blue hair, and any other color felt unnatural. When he got Simon back, things would go back to normal.
The older woman walking next to Simon was unfamiliar. But that didn’t matter. He didn’t care who was with Simon. He’d already arranged how he was going to meet with his son.
He walked across the road, angling around to the opposite side of the one-storied medical building Simon had entered. As promised, the staff entrance door was slightly ajar.
Hugo smiled. Women were so predictable.
He put his head through the door and, when no one was visible, entered the corridor.
It was too easy to enter the examination room and wait. It didn’t take long.
Simon followed the nurse into the room, his concentration distracted by the crutches he was using to get around.
“Hello, son,” said Hugo softly.
Simon’s gaze immediately flicked up, and a huge smile took over his face. Genuine delight shone in his eyes. Hugo stilled. There was something strange. He’d expected to have to explain himself. To make Simon understand how he’d had no choice. He’d known Simon would understand and everything would be fine, but he’d expe
cted resistance. He’d expected them to have poisoned Simon’s thoughts, told lies to cover their own criminal activities.
He hadn’t expected this unadulterated joy.
His heart lightened and he smiled back, this time more naturally. He’d forgotten how good it felt to have Simon around. His boy grounded him, made everything seem better, more manageable. He strode forward and grabbed Simon in a big hug, holding on for dear life.
The nurse slipped out the door with a smile on her face.
Simon pulled back first. “When did you get back, Dad? Why didn’t you just come to the Compound?”
Hugo frowned. What had they told him? “I thought this would be a good surprise,” he answered cautiously.
Simon grinned again. “It is. I’ve missed you. Garth and the others, they’re great and all, but I missed having you around.”
He felt his smile slip fractionally. Garth was great, was he? “It’s good to see you, Simon. How are you feeling?”
Simon glanced down at his arm in a cast, and then his legs. “It was pretty sore for a while. But I’m healing well.” He glanced up. “They won’t tell me how it happened, Dad. They said I had to wait until you got back.”
Forcing a smile, Hugo tried to understand what was happening. They hadn’t told him? Why the hell not? “Have they been treating you well?”
“Sure. Everyone’s been looking after me. They even brought in someone to help me get my memory back. Maddy. She’s cool as well.”
Hugo nodded as if this were all part of his plan. “And how is that going? What do you remember?”
Simon flashed a guilty look at Hugo. “Not much. I remember the fight you and Lucietta had. I’d forgotten that until a few days ago. I’m sorry, Dad. I listened in on you.”
Hugo frowned. “How long ago was that?” he said.
“Almost a year, I think. That’s what we worked it out to be.”
Hugo swallowed. That was about the time he realized his accumulated power was running out, and he wouldn’t be able to rely on what he’d gathered at the death of his father for much longer. It was also about the time Lucietta had been threatening to leave him unless he made her a partner. They’d fought about it for a couple of months, but in the end he’d given in because Lucietta was the key to finding the Carnival his family had been hunting for generations. He couldn’t afford to let her go and she knew it. He’d been so close to achieving his goal a year ago that he’d been willing to do anything to make it work.
And now Simon’s memory loss was working perfectly into his plans. The world was again running in tandem with him. He could feel it. “That’s okay, Simon.” He gave him another hug. “I’m just glad to be back with you.”
“So where have you been all this time? Garth just said you were overseas.”
“I was traveling around, checking out some new venues,” said Hugo smoothly, following the lie. For whatever reason, they’d given him the perfect cover. He’d explain it all to Simon later. “I rushed through the trip because I missed having you around.”
“Alathea’s mom is outside.” He grabbed Hugo’s hand. “Come on, come and say hi to her.”
Hugo had to resist the urge to snatch back his hand. “This has to be between the two of us for now, Simon. Something has happened. I can’t tell you what right now, but it means you can’t tell anyone I’m back. It would be very dangerous, for both of us.”
Simon frowned, opening his mouth to argue.
“You don’t want me to be hurt, do you, Simon?”
Simon shook his head. “No.”
“Then, please, do as I say. It won’t be for long.” He tried to keep his voice low and even.
“Okay, Dad. I guess so. When will I see you again?”
“Soon. When are you due to leave the Compound again?”
“Not ‘til next week’s appointment.”
“Can you ask to leave sooner? Maybe to go and get ice cream with a friend, something like that?”
Simon thought about it, his expression torn. “I guess so. If you want me to.” He paused, then said in a rush, “But I don’t get why we can’t just tell Garth. He’s really cool. He’d understand.”
He’d understand, all right. But he would have a different understanding than Hugo. He shook his head. “No, son. You want to keep Garth safe as well, don’t you?” At Simon’s nod, he continued. “Then do as I ask. It won’t be long.” He hugged Simon to his side again, then checked his watch. The nurse had been strict on the amount of time she could allow him. She’d believed his sob story, but she’d also been wary of breaking the rules too much.
“I have to go. The doctor is due in here any second. Ask to go for ice cream tomorrow afternoon. There’s a place in the central plaza in town. I’ll wait for you there in the afternoon.” He crushed Simon to his side one more time, then left via the side door just as he heard the sound of footsteps in the corridor. As he closed his door, he heard the other main door opening and the doctor’s jovial greeting.
Just in time.
***
The roar of the motorbike soothed her senses as Maddy rode down the long driveway at the Compound. Garth had taken his father home several hours before, and the slightly panicked, out-of-his-depth look on Garth’s face had made her determined to check on them this evening. While he said he was fine, clearly there were a lot of issues Garth was dealing with, not least of which was suddenly having his father fully back after ten years.
The scientist in her wanted to know what was happening. How was it possible that a man diagnosed with chronic and irreparable Alzheimer’s suddenly recovered?
The simple answer to the question was that it wasn’t possible.
Which meant whatever Milton had, it wasn’t something that had been recorded in the medical journals. And it wasn’t Alzheimer’s.
She pulled up outside Garth’s house and took a deep breath. Somehow this house always calmed her, set as it was on both the land and the lake. Surrounded by trees on one side and the frozen water on the other, she secretly thought it was a good thing the family home had been burned down if this was the kind of home they were able to rebuild.
Before she’d even climbed the three steps up to the veranda, the door opened and Garth poked out his head. “Hi. We’re all out on the other side.” He waved a hand at her to follow and disappeared again.
She followed him through the door, down the hallway, and emerged on the other side of the house, in the glass-lined veranda that sat out over the water. If you just looked directly ahead, it seemed as if it were a moon landscape, with the mottled surface of the frozen lake disappearing into the distance.
Milton was sitting in one of the chairs, bundled up in a thick jacket and a blanket over his knees. Simon sat on the other side of the door with blankets around his shoulders and his knees. She smiled at Simon and went to sit on the chair next to him.
“Did Henry change the casts on your legs as well?” she asked. The one on his left leg was just the ankle. The one on his right leg was still up to his knee but was a different color.
Simon shook his head. “Alathea and her mom took me to the doctor in town to get them changed. The doctor said I’m healing really well.” He paused. “He almost seemed a little concerned by how well.”
Milton snorted. “Part of being in the Carnival, boy. We always heal faster. Need to with the way things work around here.”
“Dad…” Garth’s voice was clearly a warning, and Maddy glanced over at him. Milton was plainly telling secrets that Garth didn’t want either herself or Simon to know.
As if they both hadn’t figured it out for themselves.
She smiled at Milton. “So how are you feeling?”
He glanced over at her, a speculative look in his eyes. “Do you always do house visits, or am I a special patient?” he said.
Maddy raised her eyebrows at his cagey answer. She cleared her throat and glanced over at Garth before answering. He just shrugged. “I’ve been studying you for the last few months, Milt
on,” she said. “I was concerned. This sudden switch is very unusual.”
“I feel fine. No need for the mollycoddling.” He waved away her concern with a shaky hand.
“Dad, you don’t know that. We have to monitor you carefully. You’ve been out of it for eight years. You can’t just suddenly go back to the way things were.”
Milton shook his head. “I can’t believe Abba lets you get away with this kind of crap. In my day, we’d have been back out in the ring, working our butts off. He must have gotten soft in his old age.”
There was a long silence. Maddy and Simon just stared over at Garth, who swallowed uncomfortably and just stared back for a moment. His eyes were a question, and Maddy nodded. He needed to tell his father where things were with the Carnival. The longer he kept him in the dark, the harder it would be.
“Dad, things have changed around here—”
“Yes, I can see that. Not for the better, either,” interrupted Milton.
“No, Dad, listen to me. This is important. I have something I have to tell you.” Garth swallowed. “Abacus was killed about two months ago. Rilla and Jack are the joint Ringmasters now.”
Milton’s face went white and his eyes seemed to bulge from his face. “Abba’s dead?”
Garth nodded.
“Rilla? But she’s just a little slip of a thing. How’s she going to manage the entire Carnival?”
“She’s doing an excellent job. Her and Jack.”
“And who the hell is Jack?”
“Do you remember Blago Knight?”
Milton nodded. “Sure I do. He was kicked out. Broke the Gift.”
“Blago and his son Jack returned just after Abba died.”
Milton shook his head. “No wonder things are struggling around here. You lot are being looked after by a girl who isn’t even wet behind the ears and a fella who wasn’t raised the right way.”
Maddy watched Garth’s expression and knew he was trying to keep his cool. His voice when he answered didn’t betray the anger she could see brewing on his face. “They’re doing a good job. We’ve had some problems, and they started way before Abba died. Christoph was helping sabotage the Carnival.”