Need You (Unrequited #1)

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Need You (Unrequited #1) Page 8

by Charlotte J Cowan


  “Ryder’s had a girlfriend for a couple of weeks? Wow! How did you meet?” she whispered in disbelief, giving me a look that was almost awe and maybe a little pity. Everyone knew Ryder didn’t date girls. He was the player. The heartbreaker. I knew the girls at school would be jealous that he was mine but they were also probably waiting for the moment his bad boy reputation took full effect and he cheated on me or something. Kind of hard to do when the whole relationship was fake. But I wouldn’t let it worry me.

  “ Meet? We’ve gone to school together for years.”

  “You know what I mean. We’ve never really been friends with him or anything.”

  She was right, sort of. We had run in different circles the past couple of years—me being in Chace’s circle and Ryder in his own solo circle surrounded by girls. He didn’t have friends at this school either, so I guess we were loners together. The only difference was that he had friends outside school, whereas I just had my wacky mother and the Romanovs. And now Ryder. Maybe. I thought I had Ryder. He was helping me after all.

  “He came into work one day. We got talking and had lunch and then it kinda became a regular thing. Next thing I knew, we were together. It sort of just happened.” I wasn’t lying completely. I was just omitting the truth. I didn’t want to get into the details of how or why Ryder had picked me up from the beach that day, so I didn’t mention it.

  “Wow. So he helped you get over your heartbreak?”

  I flinched at that question. Was it that obvious I was heartbroken? I guess it was. I mean, I did freak out and run from the school when Chace broke up with me in front of everyone and I was a crying mess for weeks after the road trip ended. But Ryder was helping, so I decided to be truthful.

  “Oh, I’m sorry. That was insensitive.” She looked mortified.

  “It’s okay. Yeah, if it weren’t for Ryder, I’d be a mess. He makes things better. Makes me forget about Chace.” It was true. He had helped. Even though I was stupidly still in love with Chace, it didn’t hurt as much when Ryder was around. He made things easier.

  “So it’s love then?” Love? Uhm, no.

  “Uhm, no. It’s way too soon for that, Indie. I care about him a lot but I’m not ready to love anyone again. Look what happened last time.”

  “That’s true but I think Ryder is different. It’s obvious how much he cares about you. I don’t think he’d ever hurt you like Chace.” Of course I knew he wouldn’t hurt me like Chace. We weren’t even really together but I couldn’t tell Indie that. Ryder was just a fantastic actor with an incredible knack for making me feel better.

  “You don’t know that. No one does.” The teacher cleared her throat and sent us a pointed look telling us to be quiet and read our books. I raised my book up to cover my face and started reading. Indie didn’t notice. In fact, her book was still on the desk unopened. I wasn’t even sure she had the right book out to be honest.

  “No, I don’t but I know what I see. And the way I see Ryder look at you, particularly out there in the hall just before, that dude’s got it bad.”

  No, he didn’t. He just wanted revenge on Chace as badly as I did, if not more. But I didn’t tell her that either. Instead, I shrugged my shoulders and returned to my book, ending our conversation. I tried to concentrate on what I was reading but my mind kept running away from me and imagining all these different scenarios where Ryder did care about me and our relationship was real.

  We could have fun. We had a lot in common. But Ryder had never been the commitment type, and he wasn’t my type. Correction—he wasn’t my type before Chace. But I was a different person since Chace and Christina got together. Was I Ryder’s kind of girl? I didn’t think so. In fact, I knew I wasn’t. I wasn’t one of those girls who threw themselves at him or dropped their panties if he so much as looked in their direction. I wasn’t easy. This was just payback for something I didn’t understand but hoped to one day when he trusted me enough to tell me.

  XI.

  “So I thought we should go on a date tomorrow night,” Ryder said to me at lunch one Thursday.

  We were sitting outside under a tree as far away from the stares and whispers in the cafeteria as we possibly could. Even after being back at school for three weeks, people still had nothing better to do than gossip about Ryder having a girlfriend and Chace being pissed that I moved on from him so quickly. The latest rumour going around the school was that Chace thought I would have been heartbroken for a long time. He wasn’t wrong. It still hurt terribly each time I saw him and Christina together. I hadn’t moved on but for appearance’s sake, I had.

  “A date?” I choked, almost spitting out a mouthful of orange juice before turning to face Ryder to see if he was serious. “We’re not dating, though. And tomorrow is Friday.”

  “Yes. A date. A real date. I know tomorrow is Friday.” Ryder gave me a quizzical look.

  Why does he want to hang out with me on a Friday night? He’s Ryder freaking Jones.

  “I’m sure you have better things to do than hang out with me.” It was true. I wasn’t anything special. There was no reason for him to hang around with me outside school hours.

  “You don’t want to be seen with me?” He frowned, nodding his head slowly as if understanding what I was talking about. He was wrong.

  “No!” I almost shouted, lowering my voice when we got a few glares. “Of course I want to hang out with you but I don’t need your pity. I don’t want a pity date, Ryder.”

  “It’s not a pity date, Bailey.” He rolled his eyes. “You know I like hanging out with you and we need to make public appearances occasionally to make this look believable.” Ryder sighed, pushing his curls out of his face.

  “We make plenty of public appearances.” Why would he want to hang out with me on a Friday night when he had friends and teammates that he could party with or whatever?

  “Bailey, you coming to my soccer practice at the crack of dawn on a Saturday when only the guys on the team can see you is not a public appearance,” he said, stealing my juice from me and taking a huge mouthful.

  “But we also—” I tried to argue back and was cut off by him rolling his eyes again. He did that a lot when I spoke. Probably because I was always arguing with him.

  “And as much fun as it is making out with you in the school halls, the school parking lot, and homeroom, it’s not the same. People in relationships go on dates,” he said. I sat up on my knees to face him, watching his mouth pull up into a smile when I wrapped my arms around his neck, his bright green eyes widening in surprise.

  “You forgot making out in the cafeteria line, and the car, and in front of Chace’s locker,” I said, his eyes lighting up and a smirk forming on his soft, pink lips.

  “That was fun. Best kiss ever. Even if you did have my back pushed into the damn padlock. Swear it’s still bruised.” He had a dreamy but pained expression on his face.

  “That was all you, Casanova. Not my fault you got carried away.” Not that I minded. Who would? I was fast becoming used to kissing Ryder. Chace, however, was furious, muttering something about disinfecting his locker and indecent exposure followed by a few choice words thrown in my direction. There was nothing indecently exposed. I’m not that kind of girl. But I will never forget the look on Chace’s face when Ryder finally stopped attacking me with his lips.

  “Totally your fault,” I added before closing the distance between us and kissing him.

  I was nervous about kissing him. What if he didn’t want to kiss me? Even though we had kissed in all those places, and quite a lot too, it was always Ryder initiating things. I had never felt confident enough just to land one on him at random times. I always let him make the first move. But when I heard that small moaning sound from the back of his throat, I knew I hadn’t crossed the line.

  “And besides, I heard Chace and Christina talking about going to the drive-in tomorrow night to watch that new chick flick that’s out. Wanna make them jealous?” He cleared his throat and grinned cheekily. I couldn’t re
fuse him. Not when he looked at me like that—with that smile and those excited eyes.

  As terrible as it sounds, I’d quite enjoyed seeing Chace’s reactions to things over the past couple of weeks. Ryder and I being in a relationship was clearly getting to him. His beautiful, show stopping, teeth flashing, movie star smile had completely disappeared and had been replaced by what Ryder named Chace’s perma-scowl. It was evident he didn’t want me to move on and that he expected me to pine after him, but I refused to do that. Every day I spent with Ryder made it that little bit easier to forget how much I had loved Chace and how I was truly better off without him.

  “Okay, let’s go. It could be fun.” I nodded, shifting my position so I could sit beside him and steal a fry from his tray.

  “Hey,” he complained, reaching to grab it back from me. But I just shrugged and shoved it in my mouth before smiling and leaning back into his arms.

  I was becoming increasingly comfortable around Ryder the more time I spent with him. It was getting easier to act as his girlfriend now with small gestures like cuddling up to him and holding his hand. Maybe now I could add kissing to the list of things I was comfortable doing. Or maybe not. It was still weird. I didn’t want him to think that I wanted to kiss him because I liked him in that way or anything. Because I didn’t. That would be awkward. I didn’t want him to get the wrong idea or freak out. Maybe I’d just leave the big gestures like kissing to him. But I wouldn’t complain. Ever.

  “Urgh, you guys are so sweet it’s disgusting.” Indie huffed, throwing her bag on the ground and sitting beside us.

  “Disgusting?” I asked.

  At the same time, Ryder screwed his nose up and asked, “Sweet?”

  “Yes, disgusting and sweet. Looking all loved up and sexy.” She glared at Ryder. “And happy together cuddling under a tree. I want tree cuddles. Ryder, do you have an identical twin you could introduce me to?”

  “Sorry, In. It’s just me.” He laughed, absentmindedly tracing patterns on my waist where his hand was resting.

  Indie pouted and crossed her arms over her chest. “Damn it. I need to find a boyfriend, or at least a date for Prom.”

  “It’s not even a real prom. We don’t have them here.” I shook my head.

  “But they’re crowning a king and queen so it still counts. And I need a date!” She huffed and looked at Ryder hopefully.

  “Uh…why?” Ryder asked, pulling his eyebrows together in confusion.

  “Stupid boys suck.” Indie sighed.

  “Then why do you want a boyfriend?” Ryder was baffled. Indie wasn’t making much sense to him.

  “To get over a stupid boy. What about any hot friends?” she asked.

  “Nah, none, sorry.” What the hell? Ryder mouthed to me behind Indie’s back. I’d have to fill him in later on Indie’s life long crush on her brother’s best friend.

  “Yeah but what about Jayden?” I asked. “He’s single.” I tilted my head to look at Ryder.

  Ryder pouted thoughtfully and shrugged his shoulders. Jayden was one of the guys on Ryder’s soccer team and Ryder’s closest friend. We’d had lunch a couple of times after practice the past couple of weeks. He was cool. I liked him. Unfortunately, he didn’t go to our school. Jayden could at least take her out a few times and then to the dance, maybe get her mind of Lincoln Andrews for a while.

  “Jayden? Who’s Jayden? Is he hot? Is he sweet? Does he want a girlfriend? Can I meet him?” Indie asked a hundred miles an hour, her eyes shining bright like a star.

  “One of Ryder’s friends. Yes, he’s hot, single and looking for a girlfriend. We can introduce them, yeah, Jones?” I nudged him when I noticed he was frowning. His fingers had stopped trailing patterns on my skin. “What’s wrong?”

  “You think Jayden’s hot?” he asked quietly, avoiding eye contact. Was he seriously jealous? I rolled my eyes and took a deep breath, trying to grab hold of that confidence I had slowly been building.

  “Not as hot as you. No one compares to you,” I told him, before pressing my lips to his.

  “Oh look, Chace is coming this way,” Indie announced while my lips were still attached to Ryder’s. He didn’t respond at first and I didn’t move. I kept my lips on his, ignoring Indie’s gagging sounds in the background. I finally felt Ryder’s mouth curl into a small smile and felt one arm wrap around my waist while his other grasped my shoulder and began pushing me backwards gently until I was lying down on the grass and Ryder’s long body was pressed against my side.

  “Ohhh...kay, I’m leaving now. This is getting rather uncomfortable. Call me when I can meet Jayden.” I heard her shuffling around to leave but didn’t acknowledge it. Instead, my fingers found their way into Ryder’s hair and pulled his mouth down to mine again when he broke the kiss.

  “I wasn’t finished,” I mumbled against his mouth, earning a chuckle from him before I felt his tongue trace along my bottom lip. I immediately parted my lips letting him deepen the kiss. I could feel eyes on us like someone was staring and I was vaguely aware that we were in the schoolyard and remembered Indie announcing something about Chace but I was too lost in Ryder’s kiss and the warmth of his large hand gripping my waist to care.

  Finally, when we were both struggling for breath, Ryder pulled away slightly and, looking down at me, he smiled. “Damn it, Bailey. That was some kiss.” I laughed at that and ran my thumb across his bottom lip, noticing how pink and swollen it looked from that intense kiss.

  “It was.” I agreed. “You’re a mess, sorry.” I smoothed my hands over his hair to tame it.

  “So are you but I like this dishevelled just-been-kissed look on you.” He smirked. “Can’t wait to see the dishevelled just been fu—” I reached up and pinched his mouth shut with my fingers.

  “Don’t finish that sentence.” I tried to sound stern and severe but was trying not to laugh at him at the same time. He sighed as I released my gag.

  “Just saying that is definitely a look I want to see on you.” He winked.

  “In your dreams, Jones,” I told him, slapping him on the chest as the warning bell rang.

  “Every night,” he admitted, pushing himself up and helping me to stand. I was just about to respond when Ryder stiffened and looked over my shoulder. I turned to look in the direction he was staring and saw Chace standing there watching, mad as hell. “Chace,” Ryder growled.

  “You didn’t know he was there?” I thought that was why he had pushed me down and kissed me like that.

  “No, why?”

  “That kiss. I thought you were trying to piss him off.”

  “That kiss was all you, Bailey.”

  XII.

  The rest of the day passed slowly. I found myself looking forward to our fake date on Friday night and didn’t know why. When class was over for the day, I made my way out to the parking lot to wait for Ryder. After ten minutes, I was beginning to worry. The school was almost empty and he was nowhere to be seen. He was never late.

  I pulled out my phone to call him when I suddenly caught a movement out of the corner of my eye. I looked up to see Ryder walking toward me with blood running down his face.

  “Ryder, what happened? Are you okay?” I rushed over to meet him. I reached up and gently touched the side of his face, inspecting the cut on his eyebrow and apologising when he winced in pain. It didn’t look too deep but it would need to be cleaned. His cheek was red and a bruise was starting to form under his eye.

  “Sorry for making you wait, love. I’m okay now. Let’s just go home.” He wrapped one arm around my shoulders and pressed a kiss to my head despite the fact that he was the injured one. Shouldn’t I be kissing him better?

  “Love?” I asked putting my arm around his waist and leading him to his car.

  “Yeah, you don’t like B unless the tool’s around, so I needed a name for you when no one is around.” And he chose love? He could call me Bailey. Love was a weird choice but I liked it when it came from his lips.

  “Okay,” I said, climbin
g into the car next to him. “Wanna tell me why you’re bruised and bleeding?”

  “Chace. He jumped me from behind before I saw it coming,” he said, turning the car on and pulling out of the lot and heading in the direction of my house.

  “He didn’t?” I gasped. I was angry at Chace for stooping that low but I guess he knew he wouldn’t have had a chance against Ryder if it was a fair fight.

  “He did but it’s fine. He’s a lot worse off than me anyway.” Ryder grinned and I nodded. I was surprisingly glad that Chace was hurt more than Ryder. I’d never been one to condone violence but Chace needed his arse kicking. How could I have ever loved him?

  Loved? Not love. Loved? I don’t even like him anymore. In fact, I thoroughly despise him. Oh my God! I am over him. When did this happen?

  “Bailey? Hey, are you listening?” Ryder was saying something but I hadn’t heard him. My mind was focused on the fact that not only did I despise Chace but I no longer loved him. I felt free. Like a weight had been lifted. It’s funny, I always thought that expression was stupid but it was true. I felt lighter, happier and no longer cared. “What’s wrong?” he asked.

  “Oh uhm, nothing, I just…I’m…I...I never mind,” I stuttered. I didn’t want to tell Ryder what I had just realised. I think I was worried that if I told him, he would want to pull the plug on this whole fake relationship but I wasn’t ready for that. Even though I didn’t love Chace anymore, it still hurt knowing he chose Christina over me but that pain disappeared when Ryder was around. Besides, I’d got so used to him being in my life, I didn’t want to lose him yet. I knew that when we would eventually break up, we would have to keep our distance. You can’t remain friends with an ex, even if he is a fake ex. I didn’t want to lose Ryder as a friend. When did this whole thing get so complicated and messy?

  “Hey, we’re here. Damn it, Bailey. What’s wrong? You’ve been silent since I told you what happened. I’m sorry I punched him if that’s what’s got you upset.” He reached over and grabbed my hand.

 

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