by Cassie Rocca
At that point, it had occurred to Zack that Liberty was refusing to eat for fear of gaining weight. The realisation had reassured him a little, but he was still determined to have her taste at least one of his desserts before the weekend was over.
He couldn’t accept that she would completely give up one of the best things in life – and anyway she had a perfect body now, how much damage could a little piece of cake do?
He silently approached her on the beach, and when she noticed him, she stopped walking and turned towards him, her arms crossed over her chest.
“Hey,” he smiled at her.
“Did I wake you up?” she asked, casting a glance at the house.
“No – I was just sitting by the window working and I spotted you down here on the beach,” he said, putting his hands in his pockets and falling into step alongside her. “Is the noise of the sea keeping you awake?”
“On the contrary, I find it relaxing.”
“So there must be something else that’s keeping you awake, then…”
Liberty looked at him with a curious expression. “Like what?”
“Hunger, maybe?” said Zack. He looked at her gravely. “Will I get the chance to see you eating anything this weekend or is that completely out of the question?”
“I told you, I’m sorry, but having flu has really turned my stomach upside down,” she said, walking faster and gazing out at the sea. “I’m sure your food is still exquisite, and everybody told you how wonderful it was, so your ego is safe!”
“My ego is doing just fine, yeah, but it’s actually your opinion I really care about.”
“I’m sure there will be other occasions, but at the moment I really have no appetite. Sorry.”
Zack took her arm to decrease her speed. “Come on, slow down. You were strolling so peacefully when I saw you from my office, but now it’s as if you’re running a marathon.” He noticed that she was only wearing a light white cotton cardigan, so he took off the hoodie he wore over his shirt. “It’s better if you cover yourself,” he said, while putting the hoodie over her shoulders, “it’s not Spring yet, and when the sun sets it gets very windy. You should be careful, especially if you’re already ill.”
Liberty looked uncomfortable. “It doesn’t matter, I was about to go back inside to bed anyway.”
“Is that my fault?” he said softly, staring at her.
“Of course not, I just wasn’t planning to spend the whole night out here.”
“That wasn’t what I meant. I meant, is it my fault that you’re so tense and irritable and have no appetite?”
Liberty shrugged. “Of course not, how could it be?”
“Does that mean that you’re not uncomfortable around me, then?”
“Absolutely not.”
Zack smiled. “Phew, that’s great to hear. Why don’t you come for a walk with me then? We still need to catch up!”
She was trapped. She bit the inside of her cheek to suffocate an annoyed expression, then nodded. “Ok then, if you really want to.”
“Great! So, first things first: why did you move away before finishing high school?”
“I never really liked Chicago, but I did like New York, where my grandparents lived. They had a shop, and every summer they would hire some students to help them with the tourists. I asked them if I could work there that summer, and they agreed. I loved being with them,” she said, not showing any emotion. “When the time came to go back to Chicago, I was so sad to leave that my grandmother asked my mom if I could stay in New York. My mom said I could, so I finished my high school there, and then I went to college, still working in their shop.”
“Didn’t your parents complain about that?”
“Not at all. My mother was always very busy. She had a full time job and had to take care of my sister, who was still young, and the house by herself. I guess that not having me to look after was actually a relief for her, to be honest.”
“And what about your dad?”
“My father abandoned the family and ran off with his secretary seventeen years ago. He never showed up again and he died six years ago.” She managed to cut him off before he had the chance to say anything sympathetic. “Anyway, moving here was the best decision of my life. My mother was happy for me too, especially when I started losing weight.”
Zack looked confused. “What does letting you move to New York have to do with you losing weight?”
“I didn’t have a normal appetite, and my body wasn’t healthy either. My mother had been trying to put me on a diet for ages, and it never worked. But when I moved to New York, I just naturally started losing weight, and that convinced her that living with my grandparents was better for me.”
“I don’t know, I could never let Candy live so far away from me just so that she could be thinner,” he replied, an incredulous expression on his face.
“She just wanted me to be happy, so she accepted my decision,” replied Liberty, before trying to change the subject. “I was surprised to find out that you’ve got a daughter,” she said, “are you married?”
“No, I’m not.”
“And will Candice’s mother be coming over during the weekend?”
“No, Veronica lives in London and I have no intention of letting her get close to Candy.”
“Oh, I’m sorry about that.”
Zack shrugged. “I’m not. We were never in love. We’d only been going out for a few months when she realized that she was pregnant. She wanted to have an abortion, but the pregnancy was too far on. She was going to get it done in some shady private clinic. So she did give birth to Candice, but after that she didn’t want to know anything about her. She made the whole pregnancy a living hell for me, and as soon as the baby was born, I made sure that she gave up all her parental rights.”
“Was it hard to convince her?”
“No, she was more than happy to give Candy up – as far as Veronica was concerned, she was just a burden. The hard part was taking care of her completely on my own while working for a renowned restaurant in San Francisco. I was already dreaming of opening my own bakery in New York, but I didn’t have enough money, or time, for that yet. Candy was still very small, and very needy. And then I met Cade,” Zack smiled, “who at the time was shooting a film near the restaurant. When we became friends, his career had just blossomed. I opened up to him about being a single parent and about my dream, and he immediately offered to help me out. He lent me part of the money I needed and supported me during the big promotional campaign for the patisserie. Thanks to that, I was able to pay off my debt in a year, and I also found a person I trust to take care of Candy for most of the day.”
Liberty frowned. “So… you live in New York full-time now, right?”
“Yes. We moved there when Candy turned three,” he smiled. “Who’d have thought it? We’ve been living in the same city for so long without knowing about each other!”
She carried on walking, looking at her feet. “Yes, how incredible,” she muttered.
“Are you thinking of going back to Chicago?”
Liberty didn’t reply at first, and then shook her head. “No. I’m never going to leave New York. It’s my home, and I don’t have any reason to leave it,” she said, staring straight ahead of her.
“That’s quite reassuring. You know, when you left Chicago I kind of thought it was my fault.”
“How so?”
“Well, the last time we’d seen each other you had left in a rush without even saying goodbye, and you’d even thrown the rainbow cupcake I’d cooked for you on the ground.”
“I was just sick and tired of being made fun of.”
“I know, and I felt awful about not having defended you enough.”
“Enough?” said Liberty, glaring at him. “You should probably rephrase that, Zack, because that almost makes it sound like you actually tried to defend me, and we both know that that never happened.”
“The truth is that I didn’t want to make things even worse for you. I
knew you had a crush on me and…”
Liberty froze. “What?!”
“Didn’t you?” asked Zack, suddenly uncertain.
“God, you’re so arrogant,” replied Liberty, her eyes wide and her hands clenched tightly into fists. Zack stepped backwards to be able to get a better look at her. Being angry sure made her beautiful – it lit up her whole face.
“You were always so nice to me… You’d smile and look at me so sweetly… Everybody at school said that you had a thing for me, so I thought it might be true.”
“Oh, of course, how could you have imagined anything else? I was just a sociopathic beached whale, wasn’t I? Of course I was doomed to fall for the first halfway decent guy who even bothered to say hi to me – is that what you thought?” Liberty asked, while removing his hoodie from her shoulders and handing it back to him in annoyance.
“I don’t know, it was just what I thought.” Zack stared at the hoodie: she was holding it as far as possible from her body, the way you might do with a bag full of dog poop, but he didn’t take it back.
Liberty lifted her arm higher. “I don’t need it, I’m hot.”
Zack took it. As he did, his fingers brushed briefly against hers, and Liberty jerked away her hand abruptly. It annoyed him.
“I guess I’m going to need this hoodie more than you do, anyway. You being around is enough to freeze the whole town,” he mumbled while putting it back on. It already smelled of her perfume, and the aroma distracted him for a moment.
“Ok, well I’ll go back to bed, so you can defrost yourself in peace,” said Liberty with a sarcastic smirk.
Zack took a deep breath to try and calm himself down, and then grabbed her arm. “Listen, wait. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude or come over as arrogant,” he said. She seemed to have relaxed slightly as well, so he continued. “But there is one thing I still don’t understand. If you weren’t pissed at me back then and you’re just totally indifferent to me now, why are you making such a show of avoiding me?”
“I’m not. And how could I avoid you anyway? I’m a guest in your house.”
Zack lifted one of his eyebrows. “In that case, prove to me that you don’t hate me and that you’re as happy as I am that we’ve happened to meet again.”
He could see that she was desperately trying to get hold of herself. It was disappointing, but, at the same time, sort of amusing. Apparently there was no chance that he would see her laugh the way she used to, but at least she wasn’t as unflappable as she thought. Seeing her annoyed would do: at least it meant that the flame within her hadn’t yet frozen completely.
“I don’t need to prove anything to anyone,” she replied, sounding annoyed.
“In that case, I’ll have to speculate: your friends and your partner think that you’re not completely comfortable here in Cape May. You do like the town, though, so there’s only one possibility: I am the cause of your discomfort. Now, you either admit it and explain to me why, or you prove to me that I’m wrong.”
Liberty pulled away the arm that he still held. “What exactly should I do to prove to you that you’re wrong?”
Zack’s eyes sparkled in the dark. “Try a piece of my cake!”
“I’m sorry, but my stomach—”
“I heard your stomach moaning for joy when I said ‘cake’ quite clearly,” he snorted, then he smiled and stepped towards her, wondering if she would take a step backwards to keep the distance between them. She didn’t move, though, and he had the impression that her expression of blatant indifference was about to change for the better.
He didn’t know how far he could push her, but he really wanted to break through that wall of icy self-control.
“I made it specially for you, and it took me a whole afternoon. I wanted it to be perfect, but you didn’t even look at it. I was so disappointed that I couldn’t even taste it myself,” he continued, before adding in a lower voice, “Come on – let’s have some together.”
Liberty’s beautiful eyes glared at him. “Alright, if I have a piece of your cake, will you believe that I don’t have a problem with you?”
“I will if you eat a whole piece of it.”
She thought about her answer for a few moments, then shrugged and nodded. “Ok then, if that’s what it takes to stop you from going on about this nonsense.”
Zack was so over the moon at the idea of having some cake with her the way they used to that he put a hand on her shoulder and led her back indoors. There was no reason for him to do so, but the fact was that he couldn’t help taking advantage of any chance for physical contact with her. He was deeply attracted to that woman, both because of the old emotions that she stirred up in him and because of what he was feeling right now. It wasn’t just about her looks – to which, of course, he was anything but indifferent – he wanted to establish a deeper connection with her.
He wanted to see her in ecstasy over his food – and he wanted to see her smile again.
Over his career as a chef he had received thousands of compliments from all kinds of people, but nothing had ever made him prouder than the enthusiastic comments she used to make back when she was a shy teenager. He remembered the long afternoons spent together when she would watch so attentively as he cooked, and he couldn’t help caressing her back.
She froze at that gesture and pulled away from his hand. “I’m quite capable of walking by myself,” she said, without looking at him.
Zack laughed softly. “I was just making sure that you didn’t pass out before we arrive home, since you’re not feeling well…”
They walked inside in silence, taking care not to wake anyone up – Zack being especially careful not to wake Justin. Convincing Liberty to have some food with him had been hard, and he didn’t want her fiancé to come downstairs and ruin everything.
He turned the lights on and gestured to her to take a seat. “I’ll prepare two portions then.”
“Okay,” she muttered while she sat down at the table. “But don’t make mine too big, please.”
He took the cake out of the fridge and put a nice yellow slice of it on a plate. “What are you afraid of?” he asked as he handed her the plate.
Liberty didn’t reply and tried to maintain a cool expression, but her fingers wouldn’t stop tapping on the table.
Zack took his own plate and sat down in front of her, determined to observe every detail of her reaction. When she noticed the fine decoration of the cake, her eyes opened even wider. Zack was relieved to see that she was quite obviously eager to taste it.
“Well, I’m relieved to see that your first reaction is positive,” he murmured. “Your face always gave your real feelings away. I always knew which dishes you’d like before you even tried them…”
“In that case, don’t force me to eat,” said Liberty. “You already know that my opinion about this cake is going to be positive.”
Zack caressed her hand lightly. Her skin was smooth and cool. “You used to like good food, and you were always eager to taste my dishes. What happened?”
“Life happened, and I changed,” she burst out, pulling her hand away. “Eating has stopped being one of my primary needs, desserts aren’t my principal passion and puffing up your ego isn’t my favorite hobby anymore. I’m not that girl now.”
Zack frowned. He felt hurt, as though she had punched him in the stomach. “So you’ve changed completely. And are you happy with the result? I’m not completely convinced it’s an improvement, if I have to be honest.”
Liberty’s expression grew dark. She pursed her lips tight and glared at him furiously, then jumped up from her chair as if she was about to explode. A moment later, though, she was back in control of herself.
Quietly, she said, “I couldn’t care less what you think of me. You didn’t like me when I was fifteen either, but guess what? I survived. I’m sure that not being appreciated by you now that I’m thirty will be even easier. Goodnight.”
Zack stood up too. “Are you pretending to be pissed off j
ust so you can avoid eating the cake?”
“Sure, right, the cake, I almost forgot,” said Liberty. She walked back over to the table, looked at the plate, grabbed a handful of cake in her hand and smashed it on his face. “There you go, you can have it all!” she said in a low voice, and then walked out with her nose in the air.
He didn’t know if he wanted to run after her and force feed her a whole piece of cake or burst out laughing… He cleaned his face with his hand and hissed after her, “Try not to lick your fingers, if you can help it! You have no idea what you’re missing, though…”
He heard her quiet footsteps on the stairs, shook his head and went off to wash the cake off his face.
She really hated him!
*
What perverse pleasure did tormenting her give him? And why couldn’t he just let her alone?
She had only been in that house for twelve hours, and she was already missing New York and her shop. It was supposed to be a relaxing weekend, but it had turned into a nightmare! Trying to avoid Zack Sullivan’s weird attacks was way more stressful than having to deal with tourists and customers.
She couldn’t stand him at all. Everything about him was irritating! His arrogant attitude was bad enough, but the thing she hated most was that he seemed so comfortable around her, even happy to see her. And then there was all that nonsense he kept coming out with.
“I made it just for you.”
“Prove to me that you’re as happy as I am that we’ve met again.”
“I care about your opinion.”
And then there were the glances, the caresses, the hoodie… And the fact that he was about a thousand times better looking than she remembered!
She knew that if he’d behaved that way towards her fifteen years ago, the old Liberty would have passed out from an overdose of joy. The upsetting thing, though, was realising that even her new self melted whenever he looked at her.
What did he want from her anyway? Why did he keep looking at her in that hungry way? And above all, why was it so important to Zack that she ate his damn food? Everybody at work and at home was always complimenting him and saying how great he was – wasn’t that enough for him?