Looking Through Windows

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Looking Through Windows Page 3

by Caren J. Werlinger


  She had avoided running past the farm where Ann rode, but this Saturday morning was sunny and crisp and was starting to smell like fall. Her feet turned in that direction of their own accord. When she didn't see Ann in the ring, her disappointment was keen. She kept on running past the farm, and was startled when Ann and Meg jumped a low stone fence in the next large field and trotted over to the road, jogging alongside her.

  "What a glorious morning!" Ann was breathless, a flush to her cheeks, her eyes sparkling.

  "It's wonderful. I couldn't resist getting out today," Emily answered, her words in rhythm with her breathing.

  "Mind if we tag along?" Ann asked as she posted to Meg's trot.

  "Not if you do the talking," Emily breathed.

  "Suddenly, I don't know what to say," Ann laughed.

  "Been playing any football lately?"

  Ann laughed again. "My bruises are just healing." She looked at Emily. "Are you from Weston?"

  "Nope."

  Ann waited for more, but there was just Emily's breathing keeping time with hoofbeats and footsteps. Ann was silent for a few hundred yards. "Tell me about your time in Europe," Emily suggested.

  "Oh gosh, that seems ages ago. Three friends and I went after high school. We had friends of our parents in almost every country, so we always had a place to stay and guides, if we wanted them. It really was a wonderful experience. Everybody was so friendly." Emily suspected Ann could make friends anywhere she went. Ann continued, "My parents came over a few times, so I didn't have a chance to get too homesick."

  "Mind if we turn back?" Emily had run further than she intended.

  "Of course." Ann kept talking as they headed back. "I ended up staying in Europe for two years, most of the second year by myself. My friends were ready for college or marriage, and I wasn't. But by the end of the second year, I needed to be doing something real, so I signed up for the Peace Corps."

  "No kidding?" Emily was surprised. Ann obviously came from money. It was hard to imagine her volunteering in some dirty, poverty-stricken part of the world.

  "I was sent to Africa, Kenya actually. I loved it so much I stayed for an extra two years."

  "What did you do?" Emily asked curiously.

  "A variety of things. I taught English and arithmetic; I helped plan and dig irrigation systems; I worked in the medical clinic. The people were wonderful, very kind and hard-working."

  Emily began to sense a depth in Ann that went well beyond her looks and what people saw on the surface.

  They were returning to the farm where Meg was boarded. "If you're tired, I'll give you a lift," Ann offered. "I just need to take care of Meg."

  Emily considered. She knew she could do the last few miles back to the Gundlachs' house, but she was enjoying the conversation. "Thanks. I think I'll take you up on that."

  She cooled off as Ann untacked Meg and sponged her off. Emily couldn't help admiring the lean curves of Ann's hips and legs in her riding breeches. Her black hair was pulled back at the nape of her neck and her sleeveless shirt revealed smooth muscles as she worked on Meg. Emily caught herself and concentrated on her stretching. At last, Meg was clean; Ann threw a sheet over her, buckled it and turned her out to graze. She quickly cleaned her tack and put it away.

  "My truck is over here," Ann said as she finished. Emily looked for a pick-up, and stopped for a second when she saw the Land Cruiser.

  "Nice truck," she said a little sarcastically.

  Ann missed the sarcasm or ignored it. Emily wasn't sure which. "It's been nice for pulling the horse trailer."

  They climbed in. "Are you sure you don't mind my being on your leather seats?" Emily asked worriedly. "I'm awfully sweaty."

  Ann laughed. "You should see how grimy and sweaty I am after a summer ride. Get in."

  Emily directed Ann to the Gundlachs' house. As she parked, Ann's eyes lit up. "This is a beautiful house!"

  "I know. I love it here. I feel like the Gundlachs have adopted me." Emily hesitated. "Would you like to come in for a cold drink?"

  "Thank you. That sounds really good right now."

  There was no sign of Mrs. Gundlach out front, but the porch was still damp in places from the morning's scrubbing. They went into the kitchen, where Greta was sleeping under the table, and poured tall glasses of orange juice. Ann looked around the first floor rooms before they went out to the back porch.

  "I love our farm house, but it isn't as old as this," Ann said admiringly, running her hand over the woodwork. Greta followed them out, resting her large head on Ann's knee and being rewarded with a scratch behind the ears.

  They sat in the rocking chairs and drank their orange juice. There was no conversation for a few minutes. Emily watched Ann as she looked around. Abruptly, Ann looked over and caught Emily watching her. Emily quickly raised her glass and drank.

  "So when were you in Europe?" Ann asked.

  "Did I say I'd been in Europe?" Emily couldn't recall.

  "No," Ann smiled, "you didn't. But I've overheard you speaking to your class, and it's obvious that you can think in French. You're not translating in your head like we are, and I figured you must have spent some time in a French speaking area to be that fluent."

  "Good deductive reasoning. I went to France as a senior on a Rhodes scholarship, and stayed two more years to work on my Master's."

  "How old are you? If you don't mind my asking," Ann added hastily.

  Emily smiled. "No, I don't mind. I'm thirty-two. So my time in France was about ten years ago now. How about you?"

  "Twenty-five."

  "Tell me about your family," Emily asked.

  "Well, I've got one brother, who's four years older. My father works for an international company, and my mother chose to stop working when we were born. We're all pretty close. My brother works and lives in Manhattan, but I prefer our farm in Massachusetts."

  Ann looked over at Emily. "What about your family?"

  "I grew up in Pennsylvania. I've got one sister and one brother, both married with two children each so far. I'm the oldest. My parents both teach, so I guess I come by it naturally," Emily shrugged.

  "What did you do after getting your Masters?"

  Emily's expression changed perceptibly. "I taught high school French and German," Emily responded as she stood. "Can I get you more to drink?"

  Ann blinked at the abrupt change in mood and conversation. "No, thank you." She looked at her watch. "I'd better be going," she said as she also stood. "Thanks for letting us jog along with you. It was nice." She tried to catch Emily's eye, but she had already turned and was walking toward the kitchen.

  "I'm glad we ran into one another," Emily agreed as she set the glasses in the sink.

  Just then, Mr. and Mrs. Gundlach came into the kitchen with bags of groceries.

  "Good morning, Miss Emily!" Mr. Gundlach smiled. "And who do we have here?" He put his bags down and turned to Ann.

  "This is a new friend of mine, Ann Hight. Ann, Mr. and Mrs. Gundlach."

  Ann shook hands with the Gundlachs. "Hello, it's nice to meet you both. Are there more bags we can help with?"

  "Thank you, girls, yes there are more," Mrs. Gundlach said. She began putting things away as the others brought the bags in.

  "Is something special happening, Mrs. Gundlach?" Emily asked. "This is a huge amount of food."

  "I forgot to tell you. Joseph, our son, is coming in today for a visit," Mrs. Gundach explained. "He'll be here for three days only, for Labor Day weekend. He's a resident in internal medicine in Cincinnati, Ohio, so he doesn't get much time off," she explained proudly.

  "Emily, why don't you and Ann join us for dinner tonight?" Mr. Gundlach invited.

  Emily looked at Ann. "Would you like to come?"

  "I'd love to," Ann smiled. "What time, and what can I bring?"

  "Six o'clock, and if you bring any more food into this house there won't be room for Emily," Mr. Gundlach teased, winking.

  "Ach! Out of my kitchen," Mrs. Gundlach clu
cked. "Out, all of you!"

  Emily walked Ann out to her truck. "I guess I'll see you this evening," Ann said.

  "I guess so," Emily smiled. As Ann pulled away, Emily ran back into the house, bounding up the steps two at a time all the way upstairs. She wanted to shower and get some work done, so she could relax and enjoy this evening.

  Chapter 7

  Joseph Gundlach arrived sometime in the afternoon while Emily was at her office. When she returned to the house at four-thirty, he was on the front porch with his father. As he stood for introductions, Emily sensed this is what Mr. Gundlach must have looked like at thirty. Joseph was over six feet, perhaps six three, with thick blond hair combed back off his forehead. He had his father's blue eyes and smile. Emily liked him immediately.

  Joseph looked at her quizzically. "You look so familiar to me," he said.

  "You know, I was thinking the same thing," she said, perplexed.

  "Have you been to Cincinnati?" When Emily said no, he shook his head. "What a weird feeling."

  She went upstairs to change into khakis with a crisp white shirt. Then she went down to see if Mrs. Gundlach needed help. Ann arrived at quarter to six with a bottle of wine despite Mr. Gundlach's warning. After being introduced to Joseph, she went into the kitchen.

  "Hello! Can I help?" she asked. When Emily turned to say hello, she stopped short. Ann was wearing white slacks and an indigo blouse that highlighted her eyes, making them seem even bluer. 'She's stunning,' Emily thought.

  Ann smiled self-consciously. "Do I look all right?"

  Emily blushed and stammered, "You look great," then moaned to herself as she realized what she'd said.

  The women brought the food to the dining room table. Mrs. Gundlach had outdone herself with roasted chicken, mashed potatoes, peas, fresh salad and fresh bread. She had been cooking all afternoon. As they all sat, Emily noticed that Joseph seated himself next to Ann. His parents wanted to know all about what he was doing, so he did most of the talking. He was almost finished with his residency, and planned to stay in Cincinnati.

  "It's a great city," he said to Ann. "Have you ever been there?" When she shook her head, he said, "You really should see it sometime."

  Emily tried to squelch the negative feelings stirring within her as she listened to him. Joseph seemed like a nice guy. Ann might really like him.

  "I think a city like Avignon is more my style," she said, smiling across the table at Emily. It took a second for the remark to sink in through Emily's reverie. She looked up with surprise and smiled back at Ann. Much of the remainder of the dinner conversation was the Gundlachs catching up on family news. Emily and Ann listened politely.

  After dinner, the younger women insisted on doing the dishes while the Gundlachs visited.

  "What a wonderful meal," Ann sighed as she washed. "I'm stuffed!"

  "I know," Emily laughed as she dried the dishes and put them away. "That's how she feeds me most of the time. I've probably gained ten pounds and it's only been a couple of weeks."

  "I love this kitchen," Ann said, looking around. "I can just imagine sitting at the table on a winter evening, with a fire crackling, and watching the deer outside in the snow."

  "That sounds wonderful," Emily said wistfully, wishing it could be.

  When they had finished the dishes, Mrs. Gundlach came in to cut thick slices of apple pie for everyone while Emily poured coffee.

  "Where did you go to medical school?" Ann asked Joseph, once they were all seated again.

  "The University of Virginia, in Charlottesville," he replied.

  Emily stopped chewing for a moment and stared at her plate.

  "I was there for four years before my residency." He frowned a little, looking at Emily.

  "That must have been an interesting hospital to be at for med school," Ann said. "It's a beautiful area."

  "Yes, it is," he said, still looking at Emily. Ann followed his glance, and saw that Emily had become pale.

  "Excuse me, I need more coffee," Emily said, quickly getting up and going into the kitchen.

  "I'm ready for a refill, too. Would anyone else like some?" Ann asked as she rose. When she entered the kitchen, she saw Emily standing at the kitchen table with her eyes closed. Ann walked over and placed a hand on Emily's shoulder.

  "Are you all right?" she asked with a concerned tone.

  Emily started at her touch and turned to her. For an instant Ann sensed Emily was about to say something, but then her brown eyes seemed to cloud over.

  "I'm fine. I guess I just ate too much, upset my stomach a little."

  They rejoined the others, and Ann poured more coffee for everyone. The conversation had moved on. Emily noticed that Joseph's attention remained mostly on his parents for the remainder of the evening. When Ann was ready to leave, she thanked the Gundlachs for their hospitality. Mrs. Gundlach gave her a hug, and said, "Please come visit us anytime, my dear."

  Emily walked Ann to her truck. "I'm really glad you were able to join us tonight," she said sincerely.

  "I am, too. It was a nice evening." She opened the door of the Toyota, and then stopped. "Are you sure you're all right, Emily?"

  "I'll be fine," she said quietly.

  As Ann drove back to her apartment, she wondered what had really happened to Emily this evening. She felt troubled, but wasn't sure why.

  When Emily went back into the house, the Gundlachs had settled in the living room. She said goodnight to them, and went upstairs. After she had undressed and climbed into bed, she lay there staring into the dark. Emotions she had been able to run from earlier caught up with her. She fought back tears. 'I will not start this again,' she said to herself. 'Damn you, Caroline... I'm sorry, I didn't mean that.'

  It seemed like ages before she drifted off.

  Emily was standing in front of a large institutional-looking edifice. She approached the front door, cupping her hands around her eyes to peer through the glass panels in the door. Two men in white coats came around the corner to stop her. She went around the other way, searching for another door. She finally found one, but people in white coats started chasing her. Every stairwell, every hallway had more white coats trying to keep her out. She ran until she was exhausted, and they caught her, pinning her to the ground while she struggled….

  Chapter 8

  Sunday morning, the Gundlachs had gone to church, so Emily had the house to herself for a while. She showered and dressed then went down for a quiet cup of coffee. She couldn't believe the irony of meeting someone up here who recognized her. She tried to ignore the fact that she didn't believe in coincidences.

  She had gone to her room to study when the Gundlachs returned. A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door.

  "Come in," she called out.

  Joseph opened the door and poked his head in. "Mind if I come in for a moment?"

  "No, not at all," Emily lied, trying to hide the dread she felt.

  "I wanted to apologize for catching you off guard last night," he said as he sat in the chair next to the desk. He cleared his throat. "It came back to me only after we started talking about UVA."

  "Did you say anything to your parents?" she asked, staring at her book.

  "No," he said quickly, "and I won't." He cleared his throat again. "Emily, I don't even know how to tell you how sorry I am… about everything."

  She looked up at him, and saw the guilt in his kind eyes. "Joseph, you were a med student. You were as powerless as I was. But thank you," she said, reaching her hand out and laying it on his arm.

  "I don't know if it will mean anything to you, but the staff felt so horrible. Your situation sparked a big debate on how to handle issues like it in the future, and I don't think it would be the same now."

  "I'm glad of that," she murmured. "Joseph," she said, blinking hard, her throat tightening, "did she ever regain consciousness?"

  "No," he replied softly. "She just slipped away."

  Emily nodded, but didn't say any more. After a few moments,
Joseph said, "Ann seems like a wonderful woman. Is she…?"

 

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