Their promises feel like a warm blanket wrapping tight around me. For a brief moment, I’m safe and secure, but still worried. And still in shock.
Jake catches my eye. “All we’ve ever done is protect you, Katelynn. Remember that. It’s your friend and boss who got you into this mess. They’ve done nothing to get you out of it.”
“I know,” I whisper. It’s true too. On the surface, Will and Brad are clean-cut and straight-laced. They’ve never had any problems with the law, yet they got me into this and haven’t lifted a finger to clear this up.
His eyes flick across mine. “You still want us to take you home?”
“Yes. I won’t tell anyone about this. Not to worry.”
Their past isn’t exactly something for me to boast about. I still don’t have the details, yet I didn’t hesitate to fall into bed with both of them.
That’s what gets me to my feet. Each second we spend at this bar makes me more resolute. I got myself in this. I have to get myself out. None of what I’ve gone through is Hunter’s or Jake’s fault. But if I stay any longer, I don’t know what will happen to them or to me. Deep down, neither option is ideal, but staying in each other’s lives almost feels like we’ll all end up getting hurt.
Hunter and Jake exchange a tense glance. I don’t wait for them to get up. Turning, I and head for the door to getting the hell out of this bar. I’m going home. My home.
30
Jake
That was fucked up.
It’s all I can think while I watch Katelynn walk across her yard and slip around the side of her house. She doesn’t look back once as she makes her way to the back door.
The last half a year has been full of struggles. It’s had more downs than it has ups. Getting out of prison, I thought I might never find a job. Starting a business changed everything. And then Katelynn came along, and it was like the sun started shining for the first time ever.
She accepted Hunter and me. She saw us for who we are and believed in us. She trusted that we would take care of her and keep the bad people away. She gave us permission to live up to our potential. No one, other than John, had done that in years.
I knew things might have been different if she knew we were ex-cons, but I also didn’t want to fully believe that. I held onto the hope that our connection meant more, that it could weather anything.
It looks like I was wrong.
I edge away from the curb and go back the way we came from. Hunter pulls his phone out and starts texting.
“What are you doing?” I ask him.
“I’m telling John and Jared to meet us at the bar. They need to know about this.”
I gnash my teeth together. Things have been going well. Business at the shop is soaring.
But maybe not for long. Even if Hunter and I don’t get into trouble for being connected to this shitshow, the truth about our pasts might get out. We don’t need customers knowing about what we’ve done and where we’ve been. Half of our regulars will stop coming.
“I shouldn’t have lied to her.”
“You didn’t,” Hunter says.
“She asked if we’d ever killed anyone...” I can’t finish the sentence. It hurts to remember that night. To think of telling Katelynn about it is torture. “I didn’t say anything. That’s as fucking good as a lie. She looked in my face and asked me a question and I didn’t give her a straight answer.”
“You did what you had to do, Jake. Don’t you fucking forget that.”
“Yeah,” I grumble. My agreement is just a word, though. I’m one of the last men on earth to possess a clear conscience.
I go on. “Maybe if we had told her earlier...”
“She’d still be upset. If we’d told her the day we met her she’d have run away from us. If we waited to tell her months from now she’d resent us. There just ain’t a right time.”
His phone buzzes and he reads it. “Take us back to the bar. John and Jake are meeting us there.”
I cruise back to the spot we just left. The bar is busier than it was thirty minutes ago. It’ll be easier to keep a conversation private beneath all the noise.
Hunter and I mill around for a few minutes and wait for a table to open up. Some middle-aged women leave one and we snatch it. Hunter orders drinks while I tap the toe of my boot on the leg of the table. Sitting still is killing me.
I check my phone, just in case Katelynn has texted to tell me she’s thought about it and she wants us to come back and get her.
She hasn’t.
“Boys,” John says from behind me. He and Jared take their seats. The waitress arrives right on their tails and deposits four beer bottles. I grab mine and suck down half of it.
John raises a brow at me. “Something going on that I should know about?”
I set my bottle on the wood with a thud. Though the place is loud, I still lean into the table and keep my voice low. “Katelynn went to the police and told them about what happened at the shop. She also told them about her car getting busted and us taking it to repair it.”
John’s eyes flash.
Next to him, Jared sips his beer. “And?”
The three of us look at him.
Jared shrugs. “Is there more?”
“That’s enough,” John says. “If Hunter or Jake get into a fight or are found with a firearm, they’re in deep shit. Their parole is violated. Hell, they can’t even look at certain people the wrong way.”
“Shit,” Jared hisses.
“Not to mention what’s going to happen if all of this gets out.”
Jared’s fingers clamp around his beer. “It could hurt business.”
“Exactly.” He grabs at the front of his hair. “Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
We all stare at him. John’s usually calm about everything. He’s always had his shit together. Maybe it’s because he’s the oldest. Seeing him lose it is strange. It also heightens my worry. Hunter and I haven’t been overreacting. We really are wrapped up in something big and dangerous.
“It’s gonna be all right,” Jared says. “We’ll take care of it.”
John clenches his teeth together. His face starts turning purple. “Y’all can’t afford to lose this. Not the shop and not the good streak on parole.”
We all mutter our agreements.
John turns to face Jared. “Are there any weapons at the shop other than the rifle?”
“Naw, that’s the only one.”
“You need to go over there right now and get rid of it.”
Jared doesn’t need any encouragement. He stands and leaves without a goodbye.
John exhales like an angry bull. “What did Katelynn say exactly? Did she mention the rifle?”
“She did,” Hunter says, “But she can’t remember if she said Jared was the one holding it or not.”
“Hot damn.” He shakes his head.
I feel the need to stick up for her. “She didn’t know what she was doing.”
John glues his gaze to mine. “Of course not. But that doesn’t change what’s been done. Do you have the windshield for her car?”
“It’s there,” Hunter says. “We just haven’t had the chance to put it on yet.”
“It needs to happen tonight. Y’all need to get that car fixed and out of the shop. If you don’t have it the police have less of a reason to talk to you. If they’re looking for evidence they won’t find it at your shop. Got it?”
Hunter and I exchange glances.
“We do,” I solemnly say.
“Good. We’ll go now.”
“You’re coming with?” Hunter asks.
“I’ll do a second sweep of the place, just in case something’s missed Jared’s eye.”
He throws some bills on the table. For the second time in one night, we leave the bar without finishing our drinks.
The ride to the auto shop is a solemn one. Jared is there, waiting in the office. Hunter and I get to work on Katelynn’s car while my brothers do another look through of the shop and make sure there’s nothing even cl
ose to illegal or incriminating laying around. We keep the front lights off and the garage closed to make it look like no one is at the shop.
Having my hands on Katelynn’s car makes my chest ache. It’s impossible to work on it and not think of her. There’s an air of finality about tonight. I don’t know what’s coming next, and the uncertainty has me wound up like a ball of nerves.
God only knows if Katelynn will ever talk to us again. I knew she would be surprised once we told her about our pasts but I never expected there to be real fear in her eyes.
Hunter and I clear out the shards of glass from the edges of the windshield and place the new shield in. It gleams in the garage lighting.
The job is done. The shop is cleared. Katelynn is taking her time to herself.
All that’s left to do is wait.
Knowing the shop is in the clear only gives me a small amount of comfort. I care about the business. It’s my livelihood. For two good months, it gave me purpose.
But Katelynn has replaced that purpose. She made caring for her and keeping her safe more important than anything else. She said she needed time to think, but one day could easily turn into a lifetime with her.
Our Kitten.
I can’t ignore the cold, brutal truth. With Katelynn potentially gone from my life forever, it’s hard to give half a damn about much of anything.
31
Katelynn
I sit on my bed and stare at the phone in my hands. I’ve thought of calling Hunter or Jake a dozen times this morning.
The trouble is, I don’t know what I would say if I did call them. Nothing has changed since last night. I’m still shaken to the bone by their revelations.
And I don’t know if I’m okay with it all yet. I just know that I miss the two of them already. I wish things could go back to the way they were before I found out Hunter and Jake are ex-convicts.
I almost wish they’d continued to keep the secret from me. It turns out ignorance is bliss. I was happier thinking they were two regular Amarillo mechanics.
I open up my text thread to Hunter and watch the cursor blink. Still no words come. The real deal is that I want to hear their voices.
But I don’t want to hear about their pasts.
My stomach lurches. Maybe I’m a bad person. I want the best that they have to offer and I want to forget about the worst.
They’ve never hurt me. I know they would never intentionally hurt me.
But I still can’t get over this awful feeling in my core.
I drop the phone just as there’s a knocking downstairs. Tucking my blouse into my skirt, I leave my room and go to the landing. I clutch the banister and watch my dad open the front door.
It’s Jake.
“Can I help you?” my dad asks.
“Jake!” I call over the railing. They both look up at me.
“One second,” I say. I rush back to my room and grab my purse and shoes. I take the stairs two at a time. I don’t know what Jake is doing here, but this isn’t a good time at all.
“This is my friend,” I tell Dad, breathless.
He looks Jake up and down.
“Jake Morris, Sir.” Jake extends his hand.
My dad shakes, but his eyes stay narrowed.
“I’m returning Katelynn’s car,” Jake explains.
I slip my shoes on and look past him. Hunter’s truck waits at the end of our driveway.
Jake goes on. “We finished repairing it early. I thought she’d like to drive it to work today.”
Dad folds his arms. “And who is that out there in the truck?”
“My other friend,” I say. “Hunter.”
Dad doesn’t move his eyes from Jake. “You work at that auto shop?”
“Yes,” I quickly say, pushing past them on my way out the door. “And I really need to get to work. See you later, Dad. Bye!”
I close the door behind me, basically shutting it in my father’s face.
Jake frowns. “You don’t want me talking to your dad?”
I sigh and step into the yard. I shoot Jake a look over my shoulder and he follows. “It’s probably for your own good.”
I keep heading for the driveway. Jake catches up to me at my car. It looks great. You would never guess the windshield was missing from it just yesterday.
“You haven’t told your parents anything about us?”
I turn to look at him. “Like what?”
He shrugs one shoulder. “Your dad looked at me like...”
His words trail off.
“Like you’re a criminal?”
Jake looks at the ground. I grind my teeth together, regretting my harsh choice of words.
“They don’t know about your past,” I tell him.
He scrunches up his nose and looks away. “Okay.”
I can’t tell if he believes me or not.
“Thank you for this.” I gesture at the car.
“What did you mean it’s for my own good?” Jake props an arm against my car and leans into it. He bends his head to make eye contact with me. The urge to get in my car and drive as fast as I can combines with the desire to leap into his arms. My head is still a jumbled mess. I’m no closer to figuring out what I’m going to do than I was last night.
“Huh?” I ask, shaking my head to clear the fog.
“You said I shouldn’t be talking to your dad.”
Katelynn
“Yeah, because he’s suspicious… And cautious. It’s because of those men showing up here, that’s all. It doesn’t have to do with anything else.”
“I see.”
He doesn’t sound convinced. Does he think I spilled the beans and told my parents that he and Hunter were in prison? That would be like shooting myself in the foot, but Jake doesn’t seem to get that.
I look past his shoulder at Hunter’s truck. Hunter raises his hand in acknowledgment. I give him a wave back.
Though I was eager to get Jake away from my father, now I don’t want him to leave. There’s too much going on in my head and heart. I can’t figure it all out on my own.
“Do you hate us?” Jake asks.
“No.” I stare into his eyes and try to show him just how much I mean it. “No, I don’t hate you. I’ve been thinking a lot, though. I barely slept last night.”
“You and me both.”
“Why did you bring my car over here?”
Jake runs a hand through his hair. “John thought we needed to get it off the shop’s property. He thought if it was gone the police would have no reason to stop here.”
“Oh,” I say in a small voice. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t, Katelynn. It ain’t your fault.”
I toe the concrete and stare at my shoe. “It kind of is.”
“I want to tell you about my past.”
I look up and into his eyes. My heart hammers away. “I don’t know if I’m ready to hear it,” I whisper.
“You wanted to last night.”
“I’m… I’m afraid.” My hands curl at my sides. “I was just starting to feel really comfortable with you two, you know? And now I feel like I don’t know you at all.”
“We’re still the same.”
He reaches for me but I step back. “Not here,” I harshly say.
Jake drops his hands. His lips twist around and he looks off past my head.
“When?” he asks.
I take a shuddering breath. “I don’t know. I have to get to work, Jake.”
He runs his tongue over his teeth and nods. His eyes stay fixed somewhere above my head. Spinning on his heel, he stalks off for Hunter’s truck. No goodbye. Not one look at me.
“Katelynn.”
My head snaps towards him. He tosses something. My keys glitter as they fly through the air. I reach up and catch them in cupped hands.
Jake climbs into the truck and Hunter backs away. My hands shake as I get into my car.
Maybe I won’t have to make up my mind about Hunter and Jake. It seems like, without meaning to, I’m pu
shing them away.
Whether I like it or not.
32
Hunter
Jake’s bad mood floats off of him and stinks up the truck.
“It’ll be fine,” I promise him.
He shrugs. “It didn’t sound like it. It seems like she don’t want to hear about it anymore.”
I absorb that. “Like in a good way or in a bad way?”
He scowls. “How the fuck can that be good?”
“It’s good if she’s willing to let things go and look the other way. Calm the hell down, Jake. I’m on your side.”
I only half believe my own words. Katelynn demanded that we take her home last night cut deep. She might be willing to look the other way, but that action might also involve her walking off for good.
The idea of never seeing her again is a brick weighing down my gut. If Katelynn can’t trust us after what the three of us have just been through, no woman ever will. Jake and I have put ourselves on the line for her. There’s nothing more we can do to prove how much we care.
Jake grumbles something under his breath but I choose to ignore it. There’s a long day ahead of us and I need to focus on work and staying calm. I’m going to be sitting on pins and needles all day, both because of Katelynn and because of the police. Her car being out of our shop doesn’t mean the cops still won’t stop by with a question or two.
My phone buzzes in my back pocket but I don’t look. We’re halfway to work and hitting rush hour traffic.
Jake pulls out his own phone and reads a message. “It’s from Katelynn. She says ‘SOS at work’.”
My lungs tighten. “Anything else?”
“No.”
I forget about safe driving and yank my phone out to look at it. “She sent me the same text,” I announce.
“I’m calling her.” He puts the phone on speaker. We listen to it ring over the rush of highway traffic. The standard voice mail greeting picks up.
“It must not be bad if she’s not answering.” The words get lower as I say them. We both know it’s bullshit optimism. The greater likelihood is that Katelynn’s not answering because something serious is going down.
Ex-Con Times Two Page 13