“Are you sure?”
Maya would know better than I would. She’d read every baby magazine on every shelf front to back. I knew she was due in a week, but beyond that, I was clueless.
She exhaled loudly and leaned back on the couch with her eyes closed. “I’m sure. I’d rather stay here and labor as long as I can before I go in.”
I worried, but agreed to wait to contact Cam. No doubt he’d totally freak out as soon as he knew she was in labor.
I ate a quick snack, packed up my supplies, and spent the next two hours comforting her through every contraction until they were close enough that we could call Cam.
As expected, he was at the apartment in record time, rushing through the house for last-minute things to throw in the hospital bag. He drove all of us, and I held Maya’s hand through the contractions that came and went on the journey.
Once they were settled in their own hospital room, I quietly excused myself. I could have held Maya’s hand until the baby came, but I wasn’t sure if I was ready to witness childbirth. Beyond that, Cameron was the one who should be with her. Until I’d fallen in love, I hadn’t known two people to love each other so hard. I knew they were destined to be together. Nothing could shake that belief.
I paced around the waiting room, hoping to get an update sooner rather than later. I shot off texts to Will and Ian, letting them know I’d be staying at my apartment in case Cam and Maya needed anything. I texted Vanessa and Darren too and promised to update them when I heard anything. Darren hadn’t contacted me since the ribbon-cutting, but a second after I sent the text, he sent a short reply.
Awesome! Keep us posted.
I smiled, thrilled that before the day was through, I’d likely be an aunt. The fact that Darren had acknowledged my existence after nearly two weeks of silence was icing on the cake.
After about an hour, Cameron emerged from the room. I rose and met him in the middle of the waiting room.
“How’s she doing?”
“Great. She’s between contractions, so I can’t stay long. They’re coming pretty close, but they say she’s got a little bit to go. Her water hasn’t broken yet. You can head back home if you want, and I can let you know when the baby comes.”
I nodded quickly. “Okay, just let me know if you need anything.”
He smiled. “I will. Thanks.”
I hugged him tight before he could leave and then shooed him off two seconds later. “Okay, go back to her.”
He rushed back to their room with a jog, and my heart twisted for the love they had.
I took the train back home, feeling jittery and high with anticipation. Back at my apartment, I considered finishing the baby’s mural, but my brain was all over the place. I was too excited, too anxious to stay focused. I needed a more mindless occupation while I waited for news from Cameron, so I started packing up some more things to take over to the penthouse.
Even though most of my nights were spent there, I’d resolved to keep the apartment furnished for another month, just in case.
The life we were building together seemed almost too good to be true, and that was what made it overwhelming at times. Day by day, our bonds grew deeper. I was happy and so ready to start living again. Because for so long, I hadn’t been. I hadn’t been especially unhappy, but something was always missing. Until Will and Ian had come into my life, I couldn’t clearly see it.
Having love in my life had reignited a passion long lost. Now I had a future to look forward to, and I was determined not to let anything or anyone get in the way of that.
I was in the middle of sorting through my staggering shoe collection when the phone rang. My doctor’s office number showed up on the screen.
I’d paid them a visit following Ian’s request so they could run the gamut on labs. I’d never had unprotected sex, but if he and Will were going to submit clean bills of health, I wanted something official to offer too. More importantly, I needed to get on the pill. My love life had been uneventful enough over the past year to justify skipping the daily ritual, but I didn’t want anything between us anymore either.
My doctor’s voice greeted me. “So we got your labs back. Good news, everything came back fine. Everything’s normal, except for one thing.”
I dropped a red-soled nude pump into the box I’d been filling.
“What’s that?”
“Well.” She cleared her throat. “You’re pregnant.”
My jaw fell. I wasn’t sure how many seconds passed before she spoke again.
“I can’t say exactly how far along you are, but based on your HCG levels, I’d say you could see us again in a couple weeks for an ultrasound, and we can get you going from there.”
“I don’t understand.” I forced the words out, because nothing made sense in this moment.
“You’re pregnant, Olivia.”
I shook my head. “That’s not possible.”
“The blood work doesn’t lie. It’s not like a home pregnancy test, where there’s room for error.”
I hung up without another word.
Chapter Seventeen
WILL
I went straight to the penthouse from work. I’d spent the day bringing Jia up to speed on all the investors and game planning for the upcoming months. We had our work cut out for us, but she seemed eager and up for the task. But after a full day, all I’d wanted to do was have Olivia in my arms. She made a rough day melt away, and the more days that passed, the more the penthouse was feeling like a home.
I’d bounced around places since I was a kid, never getting too personally attached to any one living situation. Something about this place made me want to stay awhile. Of course, Olivia had everything to do with that.
I walked through the door and put my briefcase on one of the expensive upholstered chairs that adorned the foyer. I entered the kitchen, and Olivia was sitting at a stool staring down. Her hands were threaded through her dark-brown hair that fell loose over her shoulders. She didn’t look up when I entered, and an uneasy feeling slid over me.
“Hey, beautiful.”
When she didn’t look up, I went to her. I caught her chin and lifted her gaze to me. Her eyes were glossy and red, and something seized in my gut.
“What’s wrong?”
She didn’t speak, only tucked her hair behind her ear with a trembling hand.
“Jesus Christ, you’re shaking like a leaf. What’s going on?”
“Will…I don’t know what I’m going to do.” Her voice was broken and watery.
“About what?”
She shook her head and a single tear fell down her cheek. I caught her shoulders, spinning her on the stool so she faced me.
“Olivia, talk to me.” My tone was firmer now. She was scaring the hell out of me.
“I’m pregnant,” she whispered.
My breath lodged painfully in my chest. I replayed those two words a few more times, absorbing their meaning.
“Wait… What?”
She continued shaking her head, wiping at her eyes. She was trembling harder, and now I knew why.
“I’ve been safe. I’ve always been safe. I don’t know how this could have happened. Did a condom break or something?”
My thoughts whizzed a million miles an hour. Then they paused on one moment in time. Fuck.
My hands fell from her shoulders. “You weren’t on the pill?”
She swallowed and another tear fell. “No. I haven’t been on it for a long time. That’s why I said you needed to use protection, always.”
I ran a palm down my face. “Fuck.”
“What?”
I paced away from her.
“Will…”
I turned back and held her in my gaze. “This is my fault.”
“What do you mean this your fault?”
“I—I just assumed you were on the pill and the condoms were an extra precaution.”
She widened her reddened eyes, and her swollen lips parted. “You had sex with me without a condom?”
I swallowed hard and yanked through my hair. “One night. It was the middle of the night. I had this fucked-up nightmare. All I could think about was being inside you. I had to have you. I woke you up, and you said yes. I thought you knew.”
“You did this?”
The tears fell unbidden down her cheeks. I felt like I was drowning in them. How could I have done this to her…
“Olivia, I swear I didn’t know this would happen.”
“I trusted you!” Her cry was full of despair.
She slid off the stool and closed the space between us, her fists two tight balls at her sides. When she leveled them against my chest, I didn’t bother stopping her. I deserved the pain. I deserved every ounce of her anger.
She beat her fists against me until the sobs overtook her. Her knees gave out, and she sank to the ground. I caught her and lowered down with her. When I dragged her into my lap, she was boneless and didn’t fight me. I wrapped my arms around her, holding her tight through her tears.
Her tears were worse than her blows. They lanced through me.
Every instinct told me to protect her, to find a way to make this all right. But if I held the blame, how could I protect her? How could I possibly make this right?
OLIVIA
I wasn’t sure how much time I spent cocooned in Will’s arms. I hated him right now, but there was no place I’d have rather been. He’d done this to me, and somehow I knew he was the only one who would bring me through it. I nuzzled into his shirt, letting his woodsy scent comfort me as I caught my breath.
He didn’t speak, which worried me. He was always so quick to take control of a situation, to make up my mind for me.
I looked up at him. “You’re not saying anything.”
“I’m trying not to make it worse,” he muttered softly.
“Try to make it better.”
He sighed, and I rested against his exhaling chest.
“I’m sorry, Olivia. I’m so sorry. I made a mistake. I know it’s not enough right now, but you have to believe that I would never try to hurt you.”
Fresh tears fell, but my body didn’t have any more sobs to give. I pressed my face into his chest, not caring how my mascara stained the perfectly starched shirt.
“Take me to bed. I can’t…” A sob broke free.
His arms came around me tighter and lifted us up. “I have a better idea.”
He carried me through the bedroom and into the master bath and stood me in front of the claw-foot tub. He turned on the faucet. While he checked the temperature, I stared down at the floor. Dozens of golden tiles were cool under my feet. Ian’s beautiful crown.
How would I tell him? I squeezed my eyes closed and pretended for the moment that I wouldn’t have to. Nothing would have to change. Tomorrow I’d wake up, and I wouldn’t be facing this unexpected situation. Everything could go on the way it had been.
I thought once the outside world agreed to mind its own business, we’d be safe inside our circle. I never thought something like this could happen. That my trust in Will could be so utterly shattered.
While the bath filled, Will turned his attention to me. With gentle care, he undressed me. His movements were slow and methodical, as if I were a child. There was nothing suggestive or sexual about it.
He held my hand and helped me into the bath. The warm water soothed my tense muscles, but it wasn’t enough of the comfort I needed. I wrapped my arms around my knees and held on tight through another wave of disbelief and regret.
“Do you want me to come in with you?” Will’s forearms rested on the lip of the tub. His cobalt gaze was soft and serious at once.
I nodded, and he undressed. He stepped into the water behind me, sat, and gently ushered me back so I rested against his chest. His legs framed mine. He slid his palms down my arms and gently cuffed my wrists.
I sighed as a little more of my tension melted away. At least he was here…with me. Suddenly it occurred to me that I shouldn’t take that for granted. Being in a relationship didn’t guarantee that he’d be on board for fatherhood. He could have bailed the second he found out I was pregnant. He still could.
“Are you going to stay with me?” I didn’t recognize my voice, so small and raw.
His grasp tightened. “Yes,” he said, his tone steadfast. He pressed his nose against my hair and inhaled. “It’s going to be okay, I promise,” he whispered. “Whatever happens, I’m with you. I’m not letting you go.”
I woke early and managed to slip out of bed and leave the penthouse without rousing Will. Ian would be due back from his night shift soon, and I wasn’t nearly ready to face him. The numbing shock of learning that I was pregnant had settled into a reality I was gradually getting used to.
I didn’t have much choice but to accept it. Will had been careless, and here we were. He’d accepted the blame, but I should have been more vigilant too. I’d been so wrapped up in his bubble of sex and sharing and kinky fuckery that I’d gotten too comfortable.
Nothing about life was going to plan lately, and becoming pregnant by one of my two boyfriends certainly fell right in line with that.
I grabbed a coffee and a muffin at my favorite café and made my way to the hospital.
Cameron had texted me a couple of hours earlier with a photo of my newborn nephew. Aidan Jacob had been welcomed into the world at a healthy six pounds, ten ounces. He was a beautiful little red-faced angel wrapped up tight in a hospital blanket, and I couldn’t wait to meet him.
I could have used another day or two to come to terms with being pregnant myself, but nothing was going to keep me from seeing my family today.
The bright sun marking a new day filtered through the hospital windows as I passed doors on my way to their room. I knocked and entered on the sound of Maya’s voice. She greeted me with a smile, and I went to hug her. She looked a little pale but beamed with happiness.
“How are you?”
“Good. So relieved to have him here finally,” she said.
“I bet.”
Cameron’s eyes were bright too, considering he probably hadn’t slept a wink all night. He sat in a chair beside her hospital bed. My nephew’s small body was tucked into the nook of his elbow. I peered over, eager to get a look. He was perfectly still, snoozing contentedly in my brother’s arms.
Instantly, tears stung my eyes and emotion clogged my throat. “He’s so beautiful.”
“Do you want to hold him?” Cameron’s voice was quiet.
I nodded, and he gingerly passed the precious bundle to me.
The baby made a little grunty noise, but quieted as soon as I brought him to my chest. I sat in the chair beside Cameron and looked down in wonder.
The baby opened his eyes and stared up at me. In an instant, my heart felt like it had been carried away, high into the clouds.
“Hi, baby Aidan,” I whispered, feathering a light touch down his cheek.
I pretended to listen while Maya and Cameron relived the highlights of the delivery, but I was more captivated by my perfect nephew. Between his wide-eyed stares and my whispers of adoration, we were having a big talk. Somewhere in it, I made him a silent promise that only he could hear. He would have a cousin very soon.
WILL
I stared out the window of my office. The view of New York stretched from floor to ceiling. Hundreds of cars and people milled around below. Life went on, day after day. Nothing ever made this city slow down.
But yesterday’s news had stopped me dead in my tracks. Olivia was carrying my child. Barring something tragic, our lives would be forever changed. She’d been pregnant for weeks, and we never knew it. I’d committed everything to her since then. I’d professed my love to her, and I’d meant it with all my heart.
Had I known somehow, deep down, that she would be forever tied to me after that night?
I’d held her all night, until the tears slowed and she clung to me like I was the only one who could bring her peace. She’d fallen asleep against me, and as I stared
into the darkness, I contemplated how dramatically life could change. In the blink of an eye, everything had taken on new meaning and purpose. Olivia needed me, and in nine months, so would our child.
Waking up to an empty bed filled me with a kind of anxiety I’d never experienced. I heard Ian’s voice in my head, telling me to give her time and space. Seeking that might have been her first instinct, but I wasn’t accepting it. I’d created this situation, but I wasn’t letting her go. From this moment forward, she was mine to care for in every way, and I’d be damned if I was going to let anything get in my way.
I pulled my phone from my pocket and dialed her number. She picked up after the first ring.
“I got worried when you weren’t home this morning,” I said.
“I woke up early and didn’t want to disturb you.”
“Is that the truth?”
She was silent a moment. “Not entirely. I wasn’t ready to face Ian. And Cam and Maya had their baby last night. Seeing them was more important than dealing with any of my own drama this morning.”
“How are they doing?”
“Really good. The baby is beautiful.”
I couldn’t miss the irony that we would be facing the same situation in nine short months. The thought didn’t make me as uncomfortable as maybe it should have. With anyone else, I’d be freaking the fuck out. Even though the prospect of imminent fatherhood was filled with unknowns and a litany of fears, knowing that I’d be going into that part of my life with Olivia filled me with an unexpected calm.
“That’s great. I’m really happy for them,” I said, truly meaning it.
“Me too. They’ll all be home in a couple days. I’m going to do some things around their apartment today to help them out.”
“Okay, but I want you to stay at the penthouse tonight.”
“Are you beckoning me?”
Her tone was even, not sweet and teasing the way it might have been under different circumstances.
“You’re goddamn right. I’m beckoning you.”
Over the Edge: The Bridge Series: Book Three Page 20