She hoped she could reach him tomorrow before she left on the retreat. If not, she planned to leave a message that she would be gone until Sunday afternoon. She supposed he would be also. His band had been booked every weekend. She realized it had been a week since she had last spoke with him and two weeks since she had seen him.
She missed him. She missed his smile and his caring touch. She missed being with him. Talking on the phone had been nice and helped her get to know him better, but it wasn’t the same as having him look into her eyes or hold her in his arms.
She didn’t know what to do. If she felt that strongly for him she figured she needed to let him know that, but she didn’t want to scare him away. She found herself longing to see him more--daily, and yet she wanted her independence too.
She didn’t want to have to be working her schedule around his all the time, not feeling free to take off whenever an assignment came her way. She wondered how he would feel if they started seeing more of each other and then one day she announced she was leaving for the Grand Canyon for two weeks on an assignment. Or what about when she returned to Tahoe in the fall? What if he didn’t want her to go back?
Whoa, Natalie. Slow down. You’re getting way ahead of yourself. First of all, she didn’t know if Michael was that interested in her. Second of all, she hadn’t been seeking any major travel assignments, she had only asked for local opportunities to be sent her way. Third of all, September was more than four months away. I’m beginning to think like Allison.
One day at a time, she tried to remind herself. I’m taking this one day at a time.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
“They said to park in the loading zone,” Allison said on Friday afternoon as Natalie approached Laurie and Jen’s apartment building.
Natalie pulled her car over the diagonal stripes on the pavement and left the engine running. Allison hopped out and dashed up the steps, stopping at the glass doors to press the call button.
Once they had Laurie and Jen’s sleeping bags in the trunk and a suitcase they had decided to share, the four of them piled into the car and were on their way. Allison’s incessant chatter lessened some once Laurie and Jen began doing their own share of talking. Natalie preferred to listen to the three of them chat, but she did respond whenever a question or comment was directed toward her.
“Do you mind if I put in a CD?” Allison asked. The radio was tuned to the country music station but barely audible over their conversation.
“Go right ahead,” Natalie said as they entered the tunnel, not giving Allison’s request much thought until she recognized the music but wasn’t sure who it was or where she had heard the song before. She glanced at the CD case Allison had placed on top of the bag at her feet.
“Is this Chris Tomlin?”
“Yes,” Allison said, sounding a bit surprised she asked. “Do you have some of his music?”
“Josie does,” she replied. “I’ve listened to him before.” She didn’t say that she had only done it one time.
“He’s my favorite,” Allison said. “I heard him in concert last month. He’s amazing!”
Natalie almost said that she had planned to go to that concert until Faith had gone into labor that same evening, but she decided not to since Michael had been the one to invite her. She hadn’t told anyone besides Josie and Brandon that she had gone out with him, and since she didn’t know if Michael saw them as a couple or not, she didn’t want to be talking about him as if they were, so she remained silent.
Rush hour had already started, and the Sunset Highway was slow going for the first half-hour but then began to break up, and soon Natalie was able to relax a bit and enjoy the drive. Natalie hadn’t gotten to know Laurie and Jen that well but learned more about them by listening to their conversation on the two-hour trip.
Laurie worked at Doernbecher Children’s Hospital. She had graduated from OHSU with a degree in nursing two years ago. Jen was a medical student at OHSU, in her third year. She had almost dropped out last month when she had struggled some. That had been the reason behind Laurie thinking she may need another roommate. But Jen had decided to stick it out.
Natalie also learned that Laurie was engaged. She had been dating her fiancé for three years and planned to get married sometime next fall or winter, but they hadn’t set a date yet. He currently lived in Seattle where he was attending graduate school at the University of Washington. Natalie didn’t think she could handle being that far away from her fiancé for nine months. It had been difficult enough being away from Samuel for almost a year, and they had only been close friends.
One more reason it’s best if I forget about him and move on with my life here. I certainly don’t want him to profess his love now that I have no idea when I might have the chance to go back to Europe.
Natalie pulled the car off the road after about an hour of driving and into the parking lot of a grocery store at Allison’s request to use the “little girls room.” They all decided to do the same. They also grabbed some cold drinks and snacks after Allison asked her if she minded if they ate in her car.
“I do it all the time,” she replied. “But please, no Doritos. I can’t stand the smell of them in a confined space.”
“Me neither!” Jen said as if she’d never heard anyone else agree with her on that. “See Laurie, I told you they reek!”
“Okay, okay. I won’t eat them around you anymore.”
Jen sported a triumphant smile and looped her arm around Natalie’s shoulder. “You don’t know how long I’ve been trying to get her to believe me on that subject.”
Natalie smiled but felt a bit uncomfortable with Jen’s sudden “best pal” gesture. Allison did the same thing with her all the time as if they were in the fifth grade.
Why are these people always hugging each other and me? I’m barely comfortable having my sister do that, let alone these girls I barely know.
She paid for her purchases and headed for the car. As she waited in the driver’s seat for the other three, she remembered the times Michael had held her close and wondered if she had misinterpreted his displays of affection. Perhaps he only hugged her out of friendship as well. She had noticed other guys in the group at church hugging women she knew they were not dating. Was that the way Christians treated each other on a regular basis?
She had a difficult time imagining that the time she had spent with Michael hadn’t meant something more to him, but she supposed it was possible. He had said that he wanted to kiss her though, and the way he said it made her think he definitely meant more than just a friendly peck on the cheek.
Allison’s laughter brought her back from the last time she had seen Michael, telling him good night at the front door following their second date. She hadn’t been able to reach him today as she had hoped and still felt disappointed he hadn’t returned her call. Putting the thought from her mind, she pulled back onto the highway and continued to feel perplexed at her companions’ good moods and close bond of friendship the three of them shared, despite the fact that they had known each other for less than a year. The fact that they seemed to be including her in their tight-knit circle was nice, but a bit strange and confusing also.
The clear skies over Portland continued to stay that way as they neared the coast. She kept expecting to see that familiar gray band of clouds as they came over the next hill, but when they reached Highway 101 and turned south, the hazy evening blue sky hung over them and extended out onto the horizon where it met the blue-gray water.
They stopped in Cannon Beach for some dinner and then Natalie drove down the coastline to the small town of Manzanita and turned onto the street Allison directed her to. They were all delighted to see the large house the group had rented for the weekend. It was located less than a block from the expansive beach and appeared new.
They piled out of the car and walked toward the ocean, standing at the edge of a four-foot rocky ledge that would be easy to descend to reach the sandy shore.
“I love this,” Je
n stated, looping her arm with Laurie on her right and Natalie on her left. “The smell, the sound, the feeling of wind on my face. I always feel close to God when I’m at the beach.”
“Me too,” Allison said. “Although I have to admit I prefer the warm Brazilian coast. You won’t catch me dipping my toes into that ice-cold water.”
“Chicken,” Laurie taunted her. “And you call yourself an Oregon Native? I’ll believe it when I see it.”
Natalie had good memories of the Oregon Coast too, as cold as it was most of the time, but she chose to keep them to herself. Allison said she wanted to go back to the house and get settled, and Laurie and Jen agreed, saying they could come back after they were dressed warmer. Natalie had planned ahead, however, and took the light blue hoodie she had tied around her waist and pulled it over her head.
“I’m going for a walk,” she said as the others turned away, grateful for a chance to escape their presence for a few minutes at least.
“Okay,” Allison said. “Maybe we’ll come find you.”
“I won’t go far,” she assured her concerned looking friend. “I’ll be back before it gets dark.”
Natalie carefully descended the rocky bank and had to agree with Jen as she began walking down the long shore. She loved the salty smell, the powerful sound of the waves, and the gusty wind tossing her hair like blades of grass against her face. Some of her best childhood memories were days spent at the beach with her family before her parents’ divorce.
She and Josie had spent hours in the frigid water until their feet and lips turned blue. She had helped her older brother build towering sand castles complete with a moat and drawbridges and flags they had made from Kleenex and toothpicks. Daddy had always taken them on early morning walks to look for agates and sand dollars and other beach treasures. She remembered looking for bottles with messages inside of them and throwing a few out into the water herself, wondering if anyone ever found them.
She had been to many beaches around the world since then and photographed some beautiful stretches of coastline, but nothing compared to the sandy shores of Oregon that held so many special memories. Jen had said she always felt close to God at the beach. Natalie felt close to her family.
When she saw that the sunset looked promising, she returned to the rocky access point and went to the car to grab her camera. She noticed a few more cars had arrived and saw someone she recognized coming from the house. He smiled and waved, and she returned the greeting, although she didn’t remember his name and only vaguely recognized him.
Returning to the wet sand, she set up her tripod and checked the lighting, then waited for the sun to dip a bit further behind a small band of clouds just above the horizon before taking several shots. She removed her camera from the stable mount for a moment to sneak up on some birds resting on the glassy surface of low-tide and then restabilized her equipment to be ready as the shimmering orange ball reached the water’s surface.
Glancing around, she saw a few others had gathered on the wide beach to watch the sunset that had become even more amazing than she had originally anticipated. She finished up the roll, wanting to maximize the potential of getting the perfect shot.
When her advance lever would not move any further, she let go of the cable release, leaving it to dangle beside the camera, then took a few moments to watch the glow of twilight. She put her hands into the front pocket of her hoodie and closed her eyes, allowing the natural moisture to lubricate her dried-out contacts. Feeling the cold wind tingling her cheeks and the thunderous sound of churning water and crashing waves, she found the sensations hypnotic.
She could put up with Allison’s giddiness and Jen’s optimism and Laurie’s sweetness in exchange for a few days of this. She decided she would try to spend as much time down here as possible; rain or shine; alone or with her new friends; for work or for pleasure.
Suddenly, someone grabbed her waist from behind, and she jumped out of her skin.
“Hey, beautiful.”
Whirling around to fight off the male attacker, she came to an abrupt halt and lowered her clenched fists when she saw the familiar face.
He held up his hands in surrender. “Hey. It’s only me.”
“Michael!” she gasped, laying her outstretched hand on his chest. “You scared me.”
“Sorry, Natalie,” he replied, flashing his lovable sweet smile. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder, offering her an apologetic hug. “I only meant to surprise you.”
She broke into nervous laughter. “Well, you did!”
He stepped back and grasped her hands, looking as delighted to see her as she felt about seeing him.
“What are you doing here?” she asked, not quite believing he was actually standing there.
“Coming to say hello to the lovely photographer.”
She giggled. She, Natalie Matthews, actually giggled.
“I mean,” she said in mock frustration. “What are you doing here at the beach? Isn’t the band playing somewhere this weekend?”
“Sure we are,” he replied. “This is our gig. Ted asked us two months ago to be here to lead the worship times and do a mini-concert tomorrow night. I can’t be with this group as much as I’d like because of my commitment to the youth on Sunday mornings, but I jumped at the chance to be here this weekend.”
She smiled. “You’re going to be here all weekend?”
“Yes, and I’m very happy to see you.”
“How did you know I was down here?”
“Jeff said he thought he saw you up at the house a little while ago and then I saw your car parked on the other side of Ted and Corrinne’s van. I asked Allison if she knew where you were, and she said you had gone for a walk, so I decided to come find you.”
“Remind me to thank Allison for talking me into coming.”
“I’ll have to thank her too.”
Michael stared at her for a long moment. She wondered if he was thinking the same thing she was. He still held her hands and squeezed her fingers warmly. She took a deep breath and felt her heart pounding in her chest.
“I’d love to stay down here with you,” he finally said, “but I have to help the guys finish setting up. Walk with me?”
She nodded. Stepping back to her camera, she replaced the lens cap and unscrewed the bolt from the base. She collapsed the legs of her tripod, and Michael reached out to take it from her. They began walking side-by-side back toward the rocky ledge.
“There’s a meeting scheduled at eight o’clock,” he said. “But there’s nothing going on after that. Will you come back down and go for a walk with me under the starry sky?”
She smiled mischievously. “Are you asking me out on a date, Michael?”
He shifted the tripod to his other arm and reached for her hand. “Our third date,” he said.
She grasped his warm fingers and felt a tingle travel down her spine. She mirrored his warm smile. “I can’t wait,” she replied.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
“You want some help?” Michael asked. They had reached her car and Natalie opened the trunk to retrieve her things to take inside.
“No, you go ahead,” she said, unsure if she wanted them to be seen together by the others in the group. “I’ll find out where Allison has me sleeping, and I’ll see you later.”
He handed her the tripod and flashed a smile. “I’ll look forward to it.”
As she predicted, Allison had saved her a bed in one of the upstairs rooms where Laurie and Jen were also sleeping along with two other girls. After she had rolled out her forest green sleeping bag and laid her pillow on top, she stashed her camera bag and small suitcase in the corner and then went to see where everyone was.
She found Jen and Laurie in the modern kitchen helping Corrinne put some food away. They said they didn’t need any help, and she went to the large main room where she saw Michael and the guys setting up for the meeting. He was busy and didn’t notice her.
She heard loud voices coming from down the hall an
d was about to go investigate when the front door opened and several people burst into the room. The rest of the group who had ridden in the vans had arrived, it appeared. The number of people who had come this weekend surprised her.
Continuing into the hall, she walked toward the voices and found a large game room in use by those who had already gotten settled. Allison was there along with many people she didn’t know. She was challenged to a game of Ping-Pong by Allison. Natalie could have skunked her if she hadn’t let her win a few points. She had never seen anyone play so pathetically in her life.
Another girl stepped into Allison’s place and didn’t do much better. Within the next half-hour, Natalie had played more matches than she could count and won every one of them--even against the guys. The last guy she played with started flirting with her, and after she put him away, she excused herself from the table.
“Hey, where did you learn to play like that?” Jen asked her. She and Laurie had come to join the fun once they had gotten everything tidy in the kitchen.
“My dad,” she replied. “You think I’m good, you should see him.”
The meeting was set to start in a few minutes, and they went upstairs to grab their Bibles. Natalie had brought the one Josie had given her for Christmas. Noticing Allison grab a pen and a notebook, she did so also before following her downstairs. Natalie sat between Allison and Laurie on one of the couches near the small stage in front.
Natalie continued to find the experience bizarre as the room filled up with forty single people ranging in age from twenty-one to about thirty-five, she guesstimated. How had she ever become a part of this? Wasn’t this the kind of thing high-school students did, not independent adults?
Her cynical mood left when she saw Michael step onto the stage along with the rest of the band and begin playing music on his keyboard. He began the singing time with a song she had become familiar with after attending church on a regular basis. Allison sang harmony, and with a good ear for music herself, Natalie had no trouble joining her, although her own voice was nothing in comparison to Allison’s angelic tone.
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