“It’s hard to accept it’ll only be for pleasure when it’s all I’ve ever wanted. All I’ve ever dreamed of.” She looked up at him, her owlish eyes full of pain. “Do you have any idea what it’s like to lose the one thing you’ve always wanted?”
“No.” He needed to tread lightly because she wasn’t anywhere near ready to hear what he had to say. “You have to have known this day would come, the day you couldn’t or wouldn’t compete anymore.”
“Of course I did, but I thought it would be after I’d won something, not before I even got the chance to try.”
“Fair enough.” He continued to rub her knee. “What did you see yourself doing when it was all over?”
“I don’t know,” she said in the toneless voice of a petulant three year old. Her arms hung from her slumped shoulders like unmanned oars on a drifting boat. “Coaching?”
“You think you’ve got the patience to coach?”
“You don’t?”
“No.”
“Well, thanks for the pep talk, Ty. You’ve really worked your magic.” When she tried to get up, he held her legs firm.
“Why? Because I won’t let you feel sorry for yourself? You’re young, you’re healthy, you’re—”
“I don’t think a bum leg counts as healthy.”
“A bum leg is nothing in the scheme of things. Ask any war vet what he thinks about your bum leg.”
She huffed out an irritated breath and he gentled his hold.
“You’ve got your whole life ahead of you,” Ty said. “You’ve had amazing experiences, worked like a dog, and now you’re moving on. So the after part comes a little sooner than planned. As an athlete, it’s a risk you’ve always known was there.”
“I never thought it would happen to me.”
“That’s what made you so good. When you think you’re invincible, you’re unbeatable.”
“I’ve never felt invincible, but I always knew I could hang with the best. I miss feeling that way.”
“I didn’t really know you back then, but I imagine I like you better this way. I’d bet you were hell on wheels with an ego to match.”
“I was never hell on wheels, but I was good. A part of me wants to be again.”
“You can be. If that’s what you want. Your dad believed you could compete at an elite level again.”
“I don’t know what I want.” She shrugged her shoulders and gave him a sidelong glance. “You’re an awfully good listener. You must have spent the morning on the river.”
“I did. Met your friend Lyle and fished his ranch.” He watched her as he took a sip. Her face gave nothing away.
“How was it?”
After pulling his eyes from where her shapely legs rested upon his lap, he said, “Very enlightening.”
“Enlightening? I thought fishing was about fish. I didn’t realize you were searching for the meaning of life.”
“It can be about both. Isn’t running more than exercise? Doesn’t it clear your head?”
“Yes,” she said quickly. “It does. When I let it.”
“When you let it?”
She leaned back against the cushions, lifting her chest in the process. He willed his eyes to stay on her face.
“Sometimes I can’t shut my mind off and I get careless.”
“Is that what happened when you broke your leg?”
She lifted her brows suggestively. “I got distracted when I broke my leg.”
“Yeah? So did I. I’ve been distracted for almost a year now.”
She swallowed audibly and averted her eyes. Not ready to hear that, he noted when she shifted again and changed the subject. “We’re having a big party at The Tap on Wednesday night to celebrate Olivia’s birthday.”
“I heard.”
“Are you coming?”
“Am I invited?”
She lifted a shoulder and peeked at him from under her lashes. “I wouldn’t bring it up if you weren’t.”
“Then I’ll be there.” He reached for her hand where it rested against her flat stomach and began playing with her fingers. They were so soft, the nails clipped short, and his thumb rubbed the callous on her writing hand. “But not because it’s Olivia’s birthday and not because it’s a party. I’ll be there to see you.” He linked their fingers as she stared at him, all bluster gone, and in its place, he sensed an innocent pining. How had she gone so long without someone, anyone making her feel special?
“You’d better not tell that to the birthday girl. She’s determined to be the center of attention.”
“She never is when you’re around.”
“Ha! That’s where you’re wrong or delusional.”
Ty leaned closer, bringing his arms to rest by her hips, encapsulating her in the corner of the couch. “I think it’s called enchanted.”
When her eyes dropped to his mouth, he didn’t hesitate. He could barely think through the need to taste her. He’d lied when he said she didn’t smell. She smelled like wildflowers and the soil where they flourished. She smelled like freedom, and when she arched to meet him, he tasted victory.
He brushed his lips against hers and pulled back, triumphant when her eyes remained dark and heavy with pleasure. Their gazes locked as he tasted her chin, the delicate skin under her ear, and as he sunk his teeth into her bottom lip. She moaned and linked her fingers behind his head, pulling him closer and probing his mouth with her tongue.
If she knew what a thin hold Ty had on his tether, she wouldn’t have opened for him, wouldn’t have let a purr escape her lips as he ran his hands up her sides and brushed the edges of her breasts. She wouldn’t have let her head fall back when he bit her nipple through the thin material of her shirt, still damp with sweat. Because she didn’t know, because she couldn’t possibly know how much he wanted to strip them both of their clothes and show her, he buried his lips in her neck and tasted the salty sweetness of her skin.
She wedged her palms up his chest and pushed him back. “I can’t do this. I can’t do this when I’m so sweaty and gross.”
“Jill.” Ty pleaded. “You can’t know what you do to me.”
She grabbed his face in her hands and brought his mouth back for one scorching kiss before pushing him away and gasping for breath. “Not like this, Ty. You flatter me more than I can say, but not like this.”
Leaning back from her felt like fighting the pull of a magnet when everything in him wanted to bury himself inside her. “It won’t ever happen until you say so, Jill.”
“No, that’s not what I mean. God, I can’t think when you touch me.” She kicked her legs free and stood up to pace the room. “I don’t think they come much better than you, Tyler Bloodworth. But I’m not going to…we’re not going to…”
“Take things to the next level?”
She nodded. “When I’m sweaty and gross and pissed off at my parents.”
“Why are you pissed off at your parents?”
She let out a frustrated sigh and prowled around the small space like a caged tiger. Her just-under-the-surface energy didn’t help his body to cool down from their encounter. He’d just experienced a taste of her wildness and hungered for more. “A number of reasons, but mostly because they can’t understand my decision to quit training and they don’t approve of my job.”
“Do you think you did the right thing?” he asked.
“Yes. At least for now, I’d have to say yes.”
“Do you like your job?”
“Yes. No one’s more surprised than me at how much I like it. And I’m good at it, too.” She stopped pacing to explain. “I don’t mean to sound like I’m bragging, but I know when I’m good at something or not, and I’m good at this. The employees respect me, the vendors know I’m not going to take any crap, and the patrons continue to enjoy the food and beverages.”
“I know Tommy’s happy with the job you’ve been doing.”
“I know. He’s told me. He’s a really great boss.”
Ty stood up and moved to where Jil
l had turned to the window. He wrapped his arms around her and felt a piece of his heart click into place when she relaxed against his chest. “I’m sorry you were made to feel like less than what you are. Your dad can’t separate his dreams from yours. Our parents don’t always realize how hurtful their words can be.”
“Oh, I don’t know, Ty. I think he took aim today at the bull’s-eye on my chest.”
He kissed the side of her neck and had to force himself not to hold her tighter. “You’re still standing.”
“I think I’m technically leaning.”
“Lean as long as you want.”
Chapter 22
Olivia stared at her reflection in the mirror and swished her puckered lips from side to side. She’d tried on and rejected a mountain of outfits and still wasn’t convinced the mini skirt and off the shoulder blouse was the best choice. She was turning twenty-three and she wanted to look more mature, if only for one night.
The men in the valley thought of her one way and one way only: Olivia Golden, Tommy’s too sexy for her own good younger sister. Tonight she wanted to be sophisticated Olivia. Almost-nurse Olivia. And yes, sexy Olivia.
Jill came in wearing her bathrobe and carrying a pearl gray sundress. “How about this dress?” she asked. “It’s strapless, the faux wrap creates a nice peek-a-boo effect with your legs, and the color would look great on you.”
“Where’d you get this?” Olivia asked, snatching the dress from her roommate and holding it in front of her by the mirror.
“I wore it to my brother’s graduation. It’s classy and sexy. Isn’t that the look you were going for?”
“Exactly what I was looking for.” Olivia started stripping out of the skirt and top and had the dress on in less than thirty seconds. “I love it, Jill.” She turned around to admire how her tanned and muscular back and arms looked from the rear view. “It wows from the front and the back. Do you mind?”
“Of course not. You look amazing.”
Olivia squeezed Jill and gave her the up-down. “What are you going to wear?”
“Good question. I know I’m not officially working tonight, but my managing the restaurant adds an element that has my brain all fuddled.”
“Oh, please. The only thing fuddling your brain is Tyler Bloodworth.”
Jill rolled her eyes.
“Why can’t you admit you’re totally into him? You spend every waking moment either with him or thinking about him. More importantly, he’s totally into you and everybody knows it.”
“He’s so…I’m just…” She flopped onto the only corner of Olivia’s bed that wasn’t covered in clothes. “I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop.”
“What other shoe?”
“Come on, Olivia. He’s so out of my league. I feel like the minute I let on that I’m into him, which, of course I completely am because, hello, who wouldn’t be, he’s going to realize what a dork I am and dump me. I’ll end up looking like a fool.”
Olivia pulled her up by the arms so they stood toe to toe. “I’ve never seen a guy as attracted as Ty is to you. When you went running together, he stood at the window so he could watch for you. He told me he really likes you. No guy would tell a girl’s roommate he likes her if he was going to dump her when she responded. As a matter of fact, I wouldn’t be at all surprised if he came back to the Lower Fork for the sole purpose of starting something up with you.”
When Jill bit her lower lip and slanted her eyes away, Olivia grabbed her shoulders. “What?” she asked.
“Nothing.”
“That look was not nothing. What is it? Did he tell you he came back because of you?”
“No. Don’t be silly.”
“But?” Olivia prodded.
“But he did say something that made me wonder.”
“Tell me! If I have to pull this out of you piece by piece, we’re going to miss my party.”
“I told him I got distracted when I broke my leg, because I’d looked over at him when I stepped on the rock and fell, and he said he’d been distracted for almost a year now.”
Olivia cocked her head and watched Jill watching her reaction. “I’d say that’s as good as an admission. Holy shit, Jill, the guy’s got it bad. You are so freaking lucky.”
“I know, I mean, that’s crazy, right? We never did anything other than exchange a few looks last summer.”
“You never told me about any looks.”
“If I’d told you the hottest guy I’d ever seen, a guy with a girlfriend that flew out here from the east coast to see him, was giving me looks, you’d have told me I was crazy.”
“Depends on the looks. Were they hot and smoldering?”
Jill slapped her arm and headed for her room. “You forgot about the drooling.”
Olivia eyed her pile of clothes and began rifling through her discards. “That’ll be tonight,” she promised.
***
“I can’t believe you talked me into wearing this,” Jill said as she tugged at the hem of Olivia’s short shorts. “I feel like an idiot.”
“You look hot,” Olivia said. “I can’t wait to see the look on Ty’s face when he gets a load of you.”
“He’ll probably ask me what the hell I was thinking.” She tried to catch her reflection in some of the metal appliances of The Tap’s kitchen, but all she could see was her top half. That was bad enough. How she’d let Olivia bully her into wearing short shorts and a form fitting flannel shirt rolled up her arms, cinch tied above her waist, and unbuttoned down to her bra, she’d never know. At least she’d talked Olivia into her red cowboy boots and not the three-inch kitten heels Olivia wanted her to wear.
When she tried to button her top higher, Olivia slapped her hands away. “Stop it. Stop fidgeting and relax. He’s going to swallow his tongue.”
“We already established that he likes me the way I am. Why do we have to play these stupid games?”
“Because they’re fun. Here.” Olivia handed her another shot of tequila and lifted her own tiny glass filled to the brim. “To the men who want us and the women who want to be us.”
Jill downed the shot and made a face as the tequila warmed her empty and nervous stomach. “I feel kinda floaty.”
“Perfect. Time for your entrance.” She pushed Jill toward the kitchen door, but stopped and shoved Jill behind her. “Let me go first because I want to see Ty’s face when you come in.”
“Are you sure he’s still here?”
“Yes, I’m sure. If you don’t quit hiding back here in the kitchen, he’s going to commandeer the microphone and start paging you.” She fluffed her hair and struck a pose. “How do I look?”
“You look amazing, but I think you’d look better if we switched outfits.”
“Not a chance. I’d just look like myself if I wore that. In this dress, I look sophisticated. And sexy.”
Jill grabbed Olivia’s arm before she could push through the door. “Did you happen to notice him doing something with his hands when he saw you?”
“What do you mean, something with his hands?”
Jill tried to mimic the move she’d seen Ty perform almost every time he first glanced at her. “He does this kind of…tummy rub when he sees me. I want to know if he did it when he saw you.”
“No. He gave me a friendly hug, told me happy birthday, and asked where you were.”
“Will you just watch and see if he does it?”
“A tummy rub?”
“Just trust me and pay attention.”
“Whatever.” Olivia flipped her hair. “Wait a couple of minutes before you come out so I have time to get in position.”
“Okay.”
Jill heard more calls and birthday wishes as she stretched her neck and shook her hands. She felt as though she were about to audition for a singing show in front of a live audience. When the clock passed the two-minute mark, she eased the door open, said a small prayer, and tried to walk as casually as possible with the feel of air dusting the bottom of her butt cheeks.
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The bar was crowded with people sipping drinks and munching on appetizers. Tommy spotted her first and let out a low whistle through his teeth. “Kind of a different look for you, Jill. Has Ty seen you yet?”
She could feel her cheeks heating as her eyes scanned the room. “No.” She didn’t see Ty anywhere, so she sidled up next to Tommy and started taking drink orders.
“Oh, no, you don’t,” he said as he drew a draft beer from the tap. “You’re not on tonight and I’m not paying you overtime.”
“I’m just helping out.”
He delivered the beer, turned and grabbed her shoulders, and pushed her out from behind the bar. “Go. Olivia’s orders. Just for today, she gets her way.”
“But…”
“No buts, but I’ve gotta say yours is looking very nice in those shorts.”
Olivia appeared from out of nowhere and grabbed Jill’s hand. “Loverboy’s at a table by the stage,” she whispered in Jill’s ear. “No belly rub for me, and I can’t wait until he sees you.” She waved her hand in the air at her brother. “Two tequila shots for the birthday girl and her best friend.”
She handed Jill a shot. “To the men who want us and the women who want to be us,” Olivia shouted before knocking back her shot to the hoots of the crowd. “Drink up, girlfriend.”
Jill obliged, figuring they didn’t call it a shot of courage for nothing. When Olivia pulled the empty glass from her hand, dragged Jill through the crowd, and brought her to a stop in front of Ty’s table, Jill had to work hard at not wobbling.
Ty was laughing at something Eddie said, his chair tipped back, the beer in his hand on the way to his mouth. When he turned his head and spotted her, the front legs of the chair hit the ground, the beer slopped over the lip of the mug, and his hand settled just under his rib cage. “Jill?” he choked as his eyes made quick work of her outfit.
“Hi,” was all she could manage.
Eddie slapped his beer on the table and comically scanned her up and down. “Holy shit, Jilly. You want to dance?” His eyes never made it to her face.
The laughter died from Jill’s tongue when she stole a look at Ty’s stunned expression. “Ahh, no, thanks.”
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