Love of a Rockstar

by Nicole Simone

  “Why the long face?” he asked.

  “Everybody and their cousins wants the scoop on the proposal.”

  “Tell them I am a very determined man and just because you said no doesn’t mean I won’t make an honest women out of you yet.”

  “You can try, but…” I hedged.

  Luke swatted my behind, causing a yelp to escape my throat. “You’re hilarious,” he said. “But seriously M. I do want to marry you.”

  I glanced down at the carpeted floor. “I know, but you’re on tour a lot.”

  He gripped me by the shoulders and turned me around to face him. His deep blue eyes made it impossible for me to hold back my emotions. And it’s not like I could anyways. Luke always knew what I was feeling.

  “And I will always return home to you,” he said.

  “Yes, but…”

  Luke rolled his eyes before I could continue. “No more buts. We are in this for the long haul whether you like it or not. Besides, things could change.”

  My heart leaped in my throat at his cryptic last sentence. “What do you mean?”

  “Nothing, just take it one day at a time.” He picked up my bra and handed it to me. “Now get dressed. I want to spend the rest of the day with you and Nil before I leave.”

  I watched as he walked out into the living room toward the kitchen. Disappointment stirred inside of me. For a second there, I thought Luke was about to reveal he cancelled his tour. .

  “Stupid Marlene,” I murmured to myself.

  As I shimmied into my jeans, my cell phone rang. Snapping it open, I answered with a brisk hello.

  “I can’t believe you rejected Luke on stage!” Camille yelled.

  I pulled the cell phone away from my ear. “Hello to you too.”

  “I had no idea you and Luke were even dating again.”

  “We weren’t.” I snatched my shirt off the floor. “That’s why I said no.”

  I heard Camille smile over the phone. “You weren’t? Does that mean you are now?”

  Her question made me take pause. Were Luke and I dating? If so, then I had to tell Finn I wasn’t heading off to Paris with him. Shockingly, I was OK with the idea. More than OK. I loved Luke, always had, and starting a life with him was an exciting thought.

  “Maybe,” I said.

  “Come on Marlene, stop being vague.”

  Camille’s tone was angry, but I knew she was hurt I didn’t call her immediately after the proposal happened. Kind of like how she didn’t inform me about the deal she and Luke brokered four years ago. A creeping headache formed behind my eyes.

  “I have to go,” I said.

  Camille’s voice rung out over the phone as I hung up on her. I sat down heavily on the bed with my shirt grasped in my hands. Twisting it into a knot, I sorted through the cocktail of emotions stirring inside of me. I wasn’t mad per se, but I did feel betrayed. In those first couple sleep deprived months of Nil’s life, anger the size of the Mississippi Delta hardened my heart against Luke. I didn’t want to be a single mother, and I cursed him for making me one. Who knows what would’ve happened if I saw Luke that day in the hospital room? Maybe my life would have turned out exactly the same, but I didn’t find it fair that I had no say in the matter before Camille jumped in and assumed she knew best.

  Luke popped his head around the door. When he saw I was shirtless in only a bra, his lips turned up into a wolfish grin. “Do you not want to leave this hotel room?”

  “Not really, no,” I said, bluntly.

  The bed dipped as he sat down next to me, pulling me into his arms. “I told you this once and I am going to keep telling you until you believe me. I am. Not. Going. Anywhere,” he said slowly.

  I breathed in his masculine scent of Old Spice. It was a scent I had banned in my home because it reminded me too much of Luke. A whiff of it would set me off on a crying jag.

  “Well, you are physically,” I said like the smartass I am. “But I get your point.”

  Luke laughed softly against my hair. I scooted out of his embrace and slipped on my t-shirt.

  “Let’s go.”

  He nodded grimly. “It’s about that time, isn’t it?”

  We reluctantly got off the bed and stared in the direction of the front door. Both of us not ready to face what was behind it.

  I slipped my hand into Luke’s, squeezing it in reassurance. “It will be OK.”

  He kissed the top of my head. “I know, but I hate this part of my job.”

  That was the one thing I never understood about Luke. He supposedly hated the attention to be focused on him, yet he chose a career which made that virtually impossible, then proposed in front of thousands of people. The man was a walking contradiction.

  “It seems like you didn’t really think this through,” I said.

  “Not really, no. I was just so happy to have you and Nil back in my life, I wanted to shout it from the rooftops.” Luke’s posture deflated. “And I did.”

  I laughed at his forlorn expression. He looked like a little boy who got his Tonka Truck taken away because he didn’t know how to share.

  “Unfortunately, it didn’t really go the way you planned,” I pronounced.

  His looked down at me with possession in his eyes. “No, but there was never any doubt that I was yours and you were mine.”

  A ball of lust uncurled in my stomach, sending warmth to radiate between my legs. This was ridiculous. We were never going to leave this hotel room if we kept stripping each other naked.

  I playfully smacked his arm. “Stop, looking at me like that. We have to get home.”

  “Like what?” He grabbed me by the hips and pulled me into him. “Five more minutes won’t hurt,” he murmured into my neck.

  I sucked in a breath as he kissed the spot behind my ear that sent my nerves on high alert. My eyelids fluttered closed in pleasure. I felt his hands run down the length of my back to my ass, cupping it and drawing me closer to him. His erection brushed against my thigh.

  “Luke, we can’t,” I said breathless.

  “Says who?”

  At that moment, his cell phone buzzed loudly in his pocket. My eyes snapped at open at his flurry of curse words. “Who is it?” I questioned.

  Luke looked down at the call screen with frustration. “Sorry, it’s my manager.” He laid a quick kiss on my lips. “I have to answer this.”

  Luke wandered off to the other side of the living room with a noticeable bulge in his pants. I giggled as I smoothed down my t-shirt and fluffed up my hair. It was going to be hard not to have sex again for nine months. Compared to my previous three year dry spell though, nine months was nothing or at least that’s what I tried to convince myself. I sauntered into the kitchen in search of something to eat. After the strenuous activity from last night, my stomach grumbled. Unfortunately the kitchen was empty of anything food related. Weird. High rollers like Luke usually put in a special order to have the fridge stocked with their favorite foods when they arrived.

  “What are you looking for?”

  Taken by surprise, I banged my head on an open cabinet. “Fuck,” I said as I turned around.

  Luke was leaning against the doorframe with a smirk on face. “I forgot how jumpy you are.”

  “I am not jumpy.”

  “Yes you are.” He brushed past me and opened the freezer. Grabbing ice and a hand towel, he applied the cold compress against my head. “Nice going, spaz.”

  “Thanks, I try.” I reached up and took over holding the compress. “What did Sebastian say?”

  He shrugged. “Nothing important. Just that a couple media outlets want to talk to me. Oh, and a car is waiting outside.”

  I threw the bag of peas back in the freezer as the throbbing ebbed. It was almost 9 am, only ten hours until Luke left. I wanted to spend those hours as a family.

  “Alright, I’m ready.”

  I LICKED MY lips nervously as the elevator descended to the lobby. Luke and I were sticking to the no comment rule, but I didn’t like
the idea of a thousand questions being asked at once. I looked over at Luke whose face was as expressionless as stone. Maybe that’s what I should do. I relaxed my expression into a blank slate.

  “What are you doing?” he questioned.

  “Remaining collected.”

  “Babe, you look as if you are about to murder somebody.”

  Luke collapsed into a fit of laughter at my sulking. “It’s not funny,” I whined.

  “It is a little bit.”

  His laughter was infectious, and pretty soon I felt my lips stretch into a smile. “You suck”

  Luke laid an obnoxiously loud kiss on my cheek. “But you love me.”

  I did, more than I wanted to admit. The elevator doors binged open, causing my breath to hitch in my throat. It was show time. Luke and I linked hands as we entered the lobby.

  “Is the car outside?” I asked.

  “Yup, it will be right outside the front doors.”

  My muscles relaxed a bit at the thought of an escape route if things got too hectic with the reporters. We quickly approached the revolving door. To my naked eye, it didn’t seem as if there were too many people outside. At least not the hoard I was excepting. The bright sunlight shined down upon us when we hit the sidewalk. A few young female fans swarmed Luke with pens ready. I blended into the background as he signed various objects. Looking around, I was relieved that there wasn’t a reporter in sight. Maybe the proposal wasn’t that big of deal and we blew it out of proportion.

  “Let’s go.” Luke opened the car door and slipped inside after me. “2345 Northeast Queen Avenue Drive,” he told the driver.”

  The town car glided into traffic while I settled into my seat. “That wasn’t—”

  My sentence was cut off the by the sound of my cell phone. Judging by the ringtone, it was my mother. I hit ignore and placed it back in my purse. Ten seconds later, it rang again. “Oh my god,” I said frustrated. “My mother never quits.”

  Luke gave me a sympathetic smile. “Maybe you should answer it.”

  “I’ll be home in five minutes or less. She can wait,” I replied.

  Shoving my purse away from me, I cuddled up next to Luke for the remainder of the car ride. We were in the middle of a riveting conversation about Batman when the town car came to a stop.

  “Would you like me to call backup sir?” the driver asked.

  “Backup?” I repeated, confused.

  We were in Queen Anne, not Compton. What could possibly warrant backup? I glanced out the window and was momentarily stunned.

  “Luke, look.” I pointed toward my front yard.

  Craning his neck, his eyes grew wide. “Shit.”

  Reporters from a wide variety of gossip rags with press badges were camped out, along with a few plain clothed citizens with notebooks. My guess was they were bloggers. It suddenly became clear to me why there wasn’t media coverage at the hotel. They didn’t care about the proposal. They wanted the story behind the girl who’d rejected Luke Anderson.

  I RESTED MY forehead against the cool pane of the glass, afraid to leave the car. It wouldn’t be long before the reports spotted us, but until then, I needed a moment to rehearse what I was going to say.

  “Do you want to turn around?” Luke asked gently.

  “No,” I lied.

  We sat in silence as he rubbed circles on my back, calming my frayed nerves. What would have really helped was a shot of something strong. From the corner of my eye, I spotted my purse. There was a mini bottle of Jack Daniels buried underneath year old receipts. Camille gave it to me the day Nil was born to celebrate. There wasn’t a situation dire enough for me to crack it open until today. Turning around, I swiped my knock off Chanel purse from the floor.

  Luke shot me a curious glance. “What are you looking for?”

  I sorted through unused lipsticks, change, and a cookie wrapper before I found it. Holding it up in victory, I let out a whoop. “There you are.” Not caring that I looked like a lush, I cracked the seal and took a whiff. “Holy crap.”

  Luke snatched the bottle from my grip, sloshing the amber liquid onto the leather seats. Anger burned in his eyes. “You don’t drink.”

  His anger brought the memory of why that was to the forefront of my mind. Two months before I got pregnant, I went to one of Luke’s shows with a couple of my girlfriends. We ended up getting hammered. Me more so because of my low tolerance and empty stomach. The last thing I remember was stumbling out into the night to get a breath of fresh air. According to Luke, he found me passed out near the garbage cans with puke down my dress. When I woke up the next morning, I was in a hospital bed. Charcoal from pumping my stomach lingered on my tongue. Nonetheless, that was nothing compared to the look of utter disappointment from Luke. And the words that froze my heart cold.

  “I thought you were nothing like my mother.”

  It took three days before we talked again, and only after I promised to never drink again. Pills were just as addictive as alcohol; I knew Luke was making sure I didn’t fuck up my life like his mother did. Before I could protest, he dumped the Jack Daniels out the cracked window.

  “I just needed a tiny sip,” I said meekly.

  “You don’t need liquid courage,” he said. “You have enough of it on your own.”

  If that was true, I didn’t know where it was hiding. The thought of those reporters circling me like hungry jackals caused my throat to close up.

  Luke tossed the bottle to the floor and gripped my hands between his. “If you want to spend the rest of your life with me, this is part of it.” He glanced out the window to the awaiting mob. “The best you can do is hold your chin up, and show everybody the amazing woman you are.”

  I took a shuttering breath. Luke was right. This was part of his life and now part of my mine. Besides reporters were just people. People who had the ability to slander your name. I pushed that thought to back of my mind and rested my hand on the door handle.

  “I’m ready if you are,” I said.

  “Let me go first.” He crawled over my lap as I scooted over to the next seat. “Remember no comment.”

  I nodded. His features smoothed as he stepped out onto the sidewalk and reached back to escort me. Gratefully, I linked my hand into his. Fear wasn’t an issue if Luke was by my side. Once my boots were half out the door, the madness began. The reporters caught sight of us and rushed over with cameras flashing.

  “Why did you reject Luke?”

  “Luke, how do you feel about getting publicly humiliated?”

  “Are you two still together?”

  “Is it true you have a kid together?”

  With each question that was asked, Luke’s vein in his neck twitched. . We tried to break through the throng of people, but they didn’t budge easily.

  Luke leaned down to whisper in my ear. “New plan. I am going to make a quick statement. Just keep smiling.”

  Years of working in the hospitality industry had taught me how to do exactly that. Smile until you feel like your face is going to explode. Luke raised his hand to shush the crowd. Their voices only grew louder, one question running over the next.

  His lips turned down to a frown. “Do you want me to answer or not?” he snapped.

  “Have you done a paternity test?” a guy from the back yelled.

  The murderous look Luke shot him made the hairs on the back of my neck stand at attention. Today was not a good day for a fight. I gripped Luke’s arm and directed his gaze down to me.

  “Don’t,” I said underneath my breath.

  Rolling his neck, the tension released from his body. When he set his sights back on the reporters, a fake smile stretched across his face. “I want to thank everybody for their support, but this is a matter between Marlene and me.”

  A woman with a fake tan directed her gaze at me. “Why did you say no? Is Luke not good enough for you?”

  A few women in the crowd echoed her question. Bloody hell, this was exactly what I predicted was going to happen. Luke
protectively took a step forward. He couldn’t save me though. I would be painted exactly however the media wanted. Still, my two cents couldn’t hurt.

  “Luke and I have some issues to work out—” I began to say when the woman interjected. “What kind of issues?”

  I waved my hand in the air. “Typical everyday issues every couple has.”

  “So you were a couple?”

  “Well kind of.”

  The women’s eyes narrowed. “Either you’re a couple or you aren’t.”

  “It’s not that black and white. ” I snapped.

  Luke gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze in warning but I was too pissed off to pay attention.

  “Luke and I have a long history which is none of your business,” I continued.

  “Of course it’s my business. Luke is famous and my job as a reporter is to get the latest scoop.”

  This woman wasn’t a reporter. She was a glorified busybody.

  “Reporters go to war torn countries and risk their lives to report on real issues. My rejection to Luke’s proposal isn’t a story,” I said.

  Thirteen or so outraged pair of eyes shot laser beams at me. My big mouth basically called the people who were in charge of making or breaking Luke’s career phonies. I should have held my tongue.

  Luke clapped his hands together. “Good talk, but I think we’re done for today.”

  Steering me away from the angry mob, a reporter shouted a question stopping Luke cold.

  “Did you know she is dating somebody else?” When the reporter saw he had Luke’s attention, he went in for the kill. “You’re better off without her Luke, she is just a little slut who is only after you for your money.”

  Luke spun around ready to charge the small man when a car sped around the corner, jumped the curb, and came to a stop halfway on my lawn. Finn stumbled out of the driver’s side, tripped, and landed on his ass. It was eleven in the morning, a little early for him to be wasted.

  Luke pointed his finger at the reporter. “I’ll deal with you later.”

  He stormed down the lawn and hoisted Finn to his feet. With his arm propped over Luke’s shoulder, Luke dragged him to the front door. The overwhelming scent of scotch assaulted my nostrils when Finn got in front of me.