Tessa snatched the paper afraid Victor might change his mind, placed it in her pocket, and hugged him. “Thanks, boss, you’re the best.”
An hour later Tessa still waited for Alessandro in front of his house. She left her friends’ house minutes after Victor gave her the address and got there quickly, but to her disappointment Alessandro’s car wasn’t there. She knew she had the right house, since all the others had meters’ tall brick or concrete walls around them. Despite her anger with him she couldn’t help but smile to herself, He is so out of touch…people here steal each other’s underwear if they can and he built a fence that even kids can crawl over?
Her body ached from sitting for so long. Each time a car approached, her pulse quickened only to calm down after the car drove by. She called him once more, but this time she heard, “The number you are dialing is not connected. Please call later.”
“Even better now. You turned your phone off,” she muttered. She got out and stretched, walked up and down the street, but the heat made her feel droopy. She got back in her car, wishing for a glass of water and dozed off.
Someone tapped on her car window. “Ma’am, are you okay?” Two boys looked inside her car, shading their eyes.
Tessa nodded and lifted her hand. “I’m okay, I’m okay.” She smiled at them reassuringly; the boys took off.
Her neck hurt, her legs numb with pain, the back of her shirt completely wet. Her mouth felt dry and her stomach growled. Her watched showed eight o’clock and Alessandro still nowhere to be found.
As the time passed, Tessa’s anger faded. Maybe it was for the best Alessandro didn’t come home. Maybe she just needed to forget the past and move on. Her life might be empty without him, her heart broken without him, but at least she had her life back.
She turned on the car’s engine and drove away, stopped at the first gas station, filled her tank up, bought a bottle of water and drank it all at once, then bought a second one and drove away. She didn’t want to go home, yet. The city’s lights and noise remained long behind her, but she kept driving, passing through rural villages, one after another until the mountains’ silhouettes profiled on the horizon.
Joy filled her broken heart. “My cabin, of course,” she said to herself, letting out a small cry. “God, I haven’t been here in so long.” Exuberant, Tessa stepped on the gas and hurried, but when she came around the last curve and drove straight up the narrow road to her cabin, she saw smoke coming out the chimney, and…Alessandro’s car parked outside.
Boom, boom, boom, Tessa’s heart pounded. Her hands shook on the steering wheel. She drove slowly pulling up beside his car, got out and went up on the porch. She had a key to the cabin on the chain with her car key. She opened the door and waited. The fireplace in the living room still burned and the diffused light coming from it allowed her to look around. Alessandro wasn’t there, but she heard the shower running.
Tessa went to the kitchen. Somewhere in her pantry there should be a few canned soups, jars of fruits in syrup and if she was lucky, a few horribly old crackers. Not sure where the dizziness came from—being starved or her emotions running wild—but she had to eat or she’d faint. She opened a jar of pears and ate them all, still standing as she tried to make sense of the situation.
What is he doing here? Why did he come to my cabin? Why did I come here? Tessa went for a second helping. She reached in the pantry, found another jar, twisted the lid open, picked a slice of peach and shoved it in her mouth. She turned around as Alessandro charged at her with the fire hook above his head, water running down his body, wrapped in a towel.
“Put that down, it’s just a jar of fruit; not worth it,” she pointed out, her mouth still full.
He dropped his arm and the hook, muscles bulging underneath his damp skin. He brushed a hand over his face, then through his hair and fastened the towel tighter around his waist. With only that small piece of fabric covering his body, Tessa struggled to stay focused. She remembered seeing him naked for the first time in the hotel in Italy, the attraction as strong now as it was back then. That godly body, so taut, so strong, and so perfect for her…But she was still mad at him, right?
“Sorry I took advantage of knowing where the spare key was and…I got here late and I was too tired to drive back; I promise I’ll get up early tomorrow and leave,” he mumbled visibly embarrassed to be caught in her cabin.
She sat at the table, placed the jar down and rested her palms on her lap.
“It’s okay,” she said, staring at her fingers, then up at him.
“Tessa, listen…I have…my reaction earlier was unfair to you, to what you’ve been through. I assume you are mad at me; you have every right to be. I left your house wanting to get away from you and I ended up here; no matter what I do, or where I go, I come back…to you…” he brushed a hand through his hair, holding the other on his hip. He shuffled his weight from one foot to the other, sighing, clenching his jaw.
Tessa shrugged one shoulder. His words shocked her; an apology that sounded like a love declaration? Did she hear him right?
“There are a few things you forgot here, a t-shirt, jeans and a toothbrush…You’ll find them in the spare bedroom downstairs.”
“Great. I’ll be out of your way,” Alessandro offered and turned to walk away.
“It’s not nice to make people wait in front of your house for hours,” Tessa tilted her head, looking sideways at him, then back at her fingers. “And if someone calls you until your voicemail is full, maybe they have something important to say; you might consider returning the calls.”
He turned and stopped on the kitchen’s threshold. “You went to my house?”
“Mm-hmm.”
She looked at him and once again her heart melted at the way he looked at her, his face lit up, a slow smile at the corners of his mouth.
“Did you…did you like it?”
“It’s okay, I guess, but the fence has to go,” she laughed softly. “And the yellow color, it’s too pale compared with the dark green shutters, I think.”
He came and knelt in front of her, his eyes sparkling like dewdrops. He took one of her hands and caressed the back of it with his thumb.
Butterflies filled up her stomach.
“I’m not a bad person, Alessandro,” she whispered.
“I know.”
“It’s true, I wanted an abortion, but I couldn’t do it…I guess I’ve been punished enough for my ugly thoughts afterwards, but I didn’t kill my baby…” she looked down at his hand caressing hers. She pushed a lock of hair behind her ear, tears rolling down her face. “I’m only human, I’ve made mistakes, but I paid for them. If you want to judge me for thinking ill, then I can’t stop you. I just wanted to make sure you know…I do love you, I always did,” Tessa murmured, at last revealing her hidden heart.
Alessandro helped her stand. He cupped her face and brushed a thumb over her lips. The anticipation of his kiss made her heart throb, her knees weak.
“I love you more,” he said, sealing his words with a kiss and scooping her in to his arms—to the place where she belonged.
Epilogue
“Alessandro, sweetheart, I need you to do me a favor,” Tessa said, holding the phone as a nurse entered her room to bring her dinner. The monitor recorded the regular pulse and heartbeat, as Tessa willed herself to remain calm.
“Anything for you, cara mia. I miss you already. Are you on your way home?” Alessandro said.
She smiled touched by the love in his words. “I miss you, too.” She closed her eyes, knowing that her words would cause him anxiety, but she needed him now more than ever.
“I’m actually at the hospital and I won’t be coming home.” She heard him panicking and gathering all her strength, she willed her voice to sound calm, “I promise there’s nothing to worry about, I need you to remain calm, I need you calm, okay?”
“Tessa, what happened to you? Did you have an accident? Why are you in the hospital? What hospital? I’ll be there immedi—
”
“Alessandro, please, you have to trust me. Nothing, absolutely nothing bad has happened. I need a few things from home, and Adrian is on his way to pick you up; I don’t want you driving because you sound too distraught to drive anywhere, okay? Adrian will bring a list with what I need. Put everything in a bag and bring it to…” Tessa heard somewhere in the background the doorbell, then Adrian’s voice and Alessandro frantically asking questions.
Alessandro returned to the phone, “Adrian just got here, but he’s not telling me anything, why didn’t you let him tell me what happened to you? It’s killing me; please?”
Tessa sighed. She hated not being able to tell him the truth, but she needed him there, at the hospital with her. Then she’d tell him everything, holding his hand and drowning in the love in his eyes and the warmth of his embrace.
“Alessandro, look, if something bad would’ve happened, I wouldn’t be able to talk on the phone, would I?”
He seemed to think, then she heard him sigh a few times.
“I guess you’re right. I’ll get your things and come to the hospital with your father as soon as possible. Tessa?” He paused for a second, then said, “Whatever it is, we’ll get through this together. I love you!”
“I love you, too.”
She hung up and rested her head on the hospital’s pillow. She closed her eyes, listening to the rhythmic sound of the monitor registering her heartbeat. Breathe. In and out. Everything will be all right.
Tessa and Alessandro had been happily married for over two years. After she found him bunked at her cabin, they remained there for two full days, talking their hearts out. They returned to Bucharest, starting fresh, coming slowly to terms with the past to begin building their future. They lived like nomads, staying a couple of days at her place, and then moving to his. Both had strong ties to their own nests; both had watched their houses being built and neither of them wanted to give them up.
One day, Alessandro suggested they sell his house, and buy another one where they’d decide about everything together. She felt guilty and didn’t agree with his solution, arguing that, if he sold his house, then she’d have to sell hers. Alessandro was against the sale of her home; all her memories, everything she ever shared with her parents and sisters was in that house. They compromised and sold his to a family with three children.
They lived for about half a year in her house. They were content with the place, but wanted a bigger one that fit better with their vision and dreams of a big family. They fell in love with a spacious and sunny house, with a huge backyard and a covered pool. They bought it, furnished the place and moved in.
Alessandro bought Tessa’s house without her knowing who the buyer was; he really wanted that house to remain in the family, but tired of arguing with her. He let her sisters know about his plans and they promised not to say a word until the right time.
Tessa elected to stay involved with the “Women In Need,” the non-profit foundation she established after the fundraising. She opened another shelter similar to the one managed by Dina. She loved her work, loved the people she interacted with and continued hosting fundraising events to sustain the shelter. She helped women believe in themselves and encouraged them toward school and work. She helped their children get better grades in school by hiring tutors and spending a lot of time with them.
Tessa introduced Alessandro to both Cristian and Adrian. Overly-protective Cristian seemed somewhat reserved for a while, treating him with circumspection. Soon, he realized his sister was head-over-heels in love with Alessandro and vice versa, and Alessandro’s good nature and easy-going personality won him over. They often spent evenings together, Adrian’s house becoming a home filled with jokes, laughter and games.
Cristian and Eva became romantically involved soon after the first fundraising. He fell in love with little Iulia, Eva’s daughter, who’d cuddle in his arms and made smacking kisses a must. They married four months later, electing Adrian’s estate as the wedding venue.
Alessandro never failed to amaze Tessa. He loved her each and every day with such intensity it often left her breathless. He spoke Romanian fluently. He expanded his company, hiring more people and earning himself a steady place on the financial market. He took her to Italy to meet his family. Tessa clicked instantly with everyone, especially with Gabriela, who became not only her sister-in-law, but also a dear friend.
They traveled across Italy, visiting Venice, Rome, Sicily, Naples and Pisa. For Christmas he surprised her with a trip to Germany where, in conspiracy with Chiara, Octavia, Cristian with his family, and Adrian joined them. They spent a lovely one-week vacation together as a family. One night, when everyone was seated in the family room in Chiara’s house enjoying a nice glass of wine, Alessandro got on his knee, opened a little black box and asked Tessa to marry him.
She got so choked up and so emotional, it took her several seconds to answer. She stared at the beautiful engagement ring with a solitaire square diamond surrounded by little diamonds, which fit perfectly on her finger. She accepted his proposal and in the months ahead, she planned the wedding. She had always wished for a spring wedding.
Not only did Adrian walk her down the aisle, but once again his house filled up with guests, music and laughter. They had a lovely and intimate wedding, with all their relatives and friends. When Alessandro invited her for the first dance, he finally confessed to buying her house, slipping her old key into her hand. She was already on cloud nine, and forgave him for being so sneaky.
They postponed their honeymoon for the summer. They booked a small villa in Monaco, spending their days in the sun, playing scrabble and cards. They took long walks in the evening after dinner and ended each night making love. They were so happy together and so into each other, they didn’t realize their honeymoon was soon over. The next year for their anniversary, Alessandro booked the same villa again and they enjoyed ten days of blissful happiness.
Now, six months into their second year of marriage they were still madly in love with each other. Tessa’s life had come full circle. The only thing she kept wishing for was a baby. She got pregnant twice, once before the wedding and once after the honeymoon, but both times ended up miscarrying. She was left with nothing but grief and disappointment, tears and a broken heart.
Alessandro had again tended to her, putting on a brave face, but no matter how hard he tried to be strong for her, she knew he suffered. Whenever there were children around, he always played with them, made them laugh with silly magic tricks, pulling coins out of the boys’ ears and roses out of his sleeves for the girls. The way he looked at those little ones, longing and loving, tore at Tessa’s heart, knowing she couldn’t give him what he wanted.
Alessandro opened the door abruptly and rushed to her bed, “Amore, what happened?” He dropped the bag on the floor, took her face in his palms, and stared at her as if trying to read her mind, his eyes full of dread. He tried to pull her into his arms, but stopped, seemingly confused by all the equipment around her bed. “Why are you hooked to all these machines? What happened?”
Even now, after being together for so long, Tessa still felt butterflies in her stomach and her heart racing—the monitor’s beeping the live proof of it.
She smiled at her husband, holding onto his hand, and said quickly, “I shouldn’t get too excited, it’s not good…”
The door opened and a nurse hurried in. “Mrs. Santinelli, the doctor warned you, no strong emotions, right? I see your husband is here; that’s good, now I need you the breath, long, deep breathes, that’s good.” She walked around Tessa’s bed, adjusted the drip on the IV line, checked the clipping device on Tessa’s finger and waited. Within seconds, the beeping returned to the rhythmic sound. “There you go, now it’s much better.”
“Are you all right? Do you hurt?” Alessandro asked after the nurse left.
Tessa smiled, lifted his hand to her lips, kissed it and then rested her face against it. “I am fine, I swear I am. Look I have no wounds, not
hing broken, nothing to worry about.”
He looked confused, his eyes darting between Tessa and the medical equipment. “Then, what are all these machines? What’s that sound for?”
She listened, loving the sound she heard as if waves broke against the shore—sometimes faster, sometimes distant, but always coming back.
Tessa pushed the covers away, revealing her stomach. A wide fabric belt with several connectors wrapped around her lower abdomen. She looked at her husband wanting to keep forever the memory of his lovely face, the memory of that special moment that would change their lives forever, locked in her heart like a photo in an album.
She lowered his hand and placed it on her belly. “Bed rest for the next six months. I made it to twelve weeks and the doctor said chances are I’ll be able to finish this pregnancy, with some prudence and medical monitoring.” She pressed her hand on top of his, rubbing slowly her abdomen, “Say hi to your baby.”
Special thanks to:
Cindy and Jeff, for pushing me to carve out the elephant inside each page. You’ve been my critique partners turned friends throughout my writing journey and I cannot tell you how much I appreciate your help and effort to make me a better writer.
Nikki and Becky for being my “editors” and standing by me when I was struggling to find my words. I don’t know what I would’ve done without your vigilant eyes, but don’t ask me to pay for glasses—ain’t going to happen.
Iwona and Konrad for providing me with the best photo I could ever think of for my book cover. We’ve come a long way since my first letter to you and I thank you, Iwona for being such a beautiful model and Konrad, for being a great photographer and for capturing Iwona’s beauty.
Hidden Heart Page 31