As I stared into Murphy’s dark eyes I saw them change. First, they began to glow and then they lightened from dark brown to golden amber. He became all at once mysterious and yet so very familiar.
“Ah, your eyes are so beautiful,” he whispered and I knew mine had changed to blue silver. I didn’t know if it was magic, science or some sort of strange combination, I only knew it felt right.
He skimmed his fingers down my spine and back up again as I leaned down to kiss him.
I rocked back and forth on top of him until his chest gleamed with sweat, and I licked it off. He tasted spicy, like Pack. I growled softly as he bucked beneath me and rolled so that I was pinned beneath him again, and he buried his face in the space between my shoulder and throat.
“Stanzie.” I’d never heard him say my name with such perfect longing before, and then he went still against me. He lifted his head so he could see my face. “This is all right, isn’t it?” Doubt and uncertainty filled his dark eyes.
I knew he was afraid I would get mad at him for this and accuse him of taking advantage of me as I had before.
“Liam Murphy, if you stop now, I’ll kill you.” I was so close to coming, and it was torture to be so still. I tried to move beneath him, but his weight held me down.
“Well, sure, you like it in the moment, woman.” He gazed down at me, and I saw how much I’d hurt him, and my heart clutched in my chest.
“I love you,” I whispered, and a wistful smile curled the edges of his mouth as if he didn’t quite believe me. “I love you.” I said it again and pulled him down so I could prove it with a kiss. After that, things got exquisitely hazy.
Spent and exhausted, we curled together beneath the sheets, his arm across my waist, my butt snuggled against his groin. His breath on the back of my neck was warm, and it was the last thing I remembered until morning light flooded the bedroom.
* * * *
I think it was the smell of frying sausage that pried me from sleep, but once awake I stretched into the sunshine bathing the bedroom through the open curtains.
Murphy’s side of the bed was empty, but I could still smell him and see the indent of his head against the pillow. I hugged the pillow tightly to my chest and inhaled his scent.
When I went into the bathroom, I saw by the damp towels on the rack he’d been there before me. I marveled at how deeply I must have slept, because I hadn’t heard a thing.
“Last night was probably the best sleep I’ve gotten in months,” I announced when I walked into the galley kitchen in my bare feet, my hair still wet from the shower.
He had his back to me as he poured himself a cup of coffee, but when he turned, he revealed his smooth and shaved face. No more goatee.
My heart jolted. Here was my familiar Murphy. He even wore a t-shirt I remembered. His bond pendant gleamed around his throat, and I thought I would either die or burst into tears for a moment. Everything got very bright and hectic as if I’d been seeing the world in black-and-white and miraculously could now see color.
“Is it your wolf?” He was at my side in an instant, alarm making his voice deep.
“It’s you,” I managed. “You shaved your goatee.”
He tweaked the tip of my nose with his finger, which startled me. He never did playful things like that.
“Let me get you a cup of coffee.” As he squeezed by me to get to the cupboard, he snaked his arms around my waist from behind and gave me a gentle hug.
Murphy was never openly affectionate like that. He touched me either to calm me down or when we were in bed together.
I guessed things would change now he knew I loved him. Maybe he’d been as starved for casual touch as I had been, only afraid I’d reject him. Maybe it wasn’t that he preferred to touch first, but that he didn’t want to impose himself?
I turned around and hugged him hard, and he was stiff for a moment but then relaxed into me. He was hungry for touch—I could feel it. What idiots we’d been.
I opened my mouth to tell him this, and my damn cellphone chirped.
“Stanzie.” Jason Allerton sounded more than a little ticked off when I answered. I’d called him when I’d arrived at the airport, and he’d asked me to keep in touch every day, and obviously I had not. Shit.
“Jason,” I blurted in total shock. Behind me, Murphy nearly choked on a mouthful of coffee and hastily set his mug on the counter. Eyes narrowed, I knew he would listen in to the conversation. Pack hearing made eavesdropping on phone conversations a snap.
“You sound surprised to hear my voice.” I could see Jason’s sardonic expression in my mind’s eye, and winced.
I floundered for an excuse and came up with a lame one, but I only had seconds. “It’s just that it must be the middle of the night where you are.”
“Wrong,” he corrected. “It’s a little after nine in the morning. I’m in London having breakfast before I head for Heathrow. One of the UK Councilors was returning home, and I decided to hitch a ride. I’m due to board a flight for Dublin in three and a half hours, and I would like you and Liam to pick me up at the airport this afternoon at two thirty.” He gave me the particulars—which terminal and where—but I barely listened because of my struggle to draw a deep breath. Panic squeezed my throat nearly shut, and black spots danced before my eyes.
He could not come here now. Nothing was settled, everything was a riotous mess, and he’d make me tell him the truth—I just knew it. I could not deliberately lie to a Councilor.
“I’m sorry I haven’t called you like you asked, but I don’t know why you have to come here. I haven’t done much. The reason I haven’t called is because I’ve been working things out with Mur—”
“Constance.” He used my full name. That couldn’t be good. “I’m coming. There are things we need to discuss, and I prefer to do them in person. I’ll see you this afternoon.” The phone went dead, and I shook it as if I could make him reconnect, but it was useless.
I met Murphy’s gaze with my own.
“Shit,” I said. He opened his mouth to say something hopefully more helpful, but the street door buzzer sounded, and I almost shrieked aloud.
Murphy moved for the security panel by the front door and pressed the intercom button. “Yes?”
“Liam, it’s Etain Feehery. Buzz me up.”
“Shit.” It was Murphy’s turn to swear, but he pressed the button to unlock the street door and undid the locks on the apartment door so he could have it open by the time Etain Feehery, whoever the hell she was, arrived.
When she breezed into the apartment, I recognized her immediately as the woman from An Puca who had asked me if I’d heard the one about Mozart being Pack.
Her red-brown hair fell in attractive waves to her shoulders, and she wore tight jeans and a hand-knitted sweater. I recognized the pattern. Paddy had worn a similar one in Connecticut during my tribunal. I suspected she was a fabulous knitter and making and selling sweaters was her contribution to the pack and their funds.
Or maybe not.
Power surrounded her and made a path in front of her. Murphy stepped out of her way automatically, and I moved, too, when she looked at me, but instead of away, I moved forward.
“Ah, Stanzie, hello to you. Liam, your bond mate’s one hell of a harpist. You should have heard her put Declan Byrne to shame with her clever rendition of Carolan’s Farewell. Brought a tear to my eye, it did.”
“Etain,” Murphy began, but she held up a hand, and Murphy fell silent. Her pack ring glittered under the muted track lights.
“This is a serious conversation we’re having, and I’m thinking we’d best use titles, Advisor.”
“Councilor Feehery,” Murphy corrected himself, and I paled. She was a fucking Councilor? Holy shit. “Would you like some coffee?”
“I wouldn’t mind. Add a wee shot of Jameson’s, too, please.” Councilor Feehery strode to one of the sofas and sat. She patted the cushion beside her, and reluctantly I moved to sit beside her.
“I served
on the UK Regional Council for nearly ten years before I was tapped for the Great Council,” she told me, and my heart sank. She served on the Great Council. We were so screwed. “Have you got your eye on the Regional Council, Advisor?”
“I can barely handle being an Advisor,” I muttered, and Murphy dropped a spoon in the kitchen. I couldn’t help it. It was the truth. Advisors worked for Councilors. They did the legwork and gathered facts. Councilors decided what to do with the evidence. I was not ready for that responsibility. At all.
“Ah, you’re new at it. But you’re good from what I’ve been hearing.” The Irish lilt in her voice was pronounced, and I had to struggle to keep up. I wondered if my New England American accent sounded flat and dull to her ears, and decided I didn’t care. I had more important things to think about than frigging accents. Concentrate.
She leaned closer and put a hand on my arm. The thrum of power she emanated was like an electric tingle. She reminded me of Jason Allerton. “Ripping out the throat of that Alpha took real balls.” When she said throat it sounded like troat, and I shuddered at the sudden spiky taste of Nate’s phantom blood in my mouth.
“Did you come to talk about that?” My hands shook as I accepted a mug of coffee from Murphy. I hoped mine had a wee shot of Jameson’s, too. I gulped some down. It did.
“No,” Councilor Feehery said. “I came to talk about Pack First and the Guardians, of course.”
I carefully placed my mug on the coffee table and tried not to shake apart.
“Don’t carry on so,” advised Councilor Feehery, and she patted my back. “I’ve been after knowing about it all along. Not surprising, is it, me being a charter member of the Guardians and all. I recruited Paddy O’Reilly and his father before him.”
My heart performed such erratic and painful antics in my chest, I had to be experiencing the onset of a major heart attack. Hearts were definitely not supposed to do things like mine was. If Etain Feehery had recruited Paddy and his father, where did that leave Glenn Murphy? Was he fucking Pack First? A Guardian? A Guardian who condoned murder? Which part of the Guardians did Etain Feehery support? What a fucking tangled mess this was.
Murphy sat on the sofa opposite us, his eyes dark.
“This is no surprise to you, Liam, of course, but I see you’ve not been sharing with your bond mate. You’re trying to protect her. Isn’t that sweet of you.” Councilor Feehery turned her gaze to his, and he met her eyes without fear, but his whole body was tense.
That revelation stung a little. Of course Paddy had told Murphy who his recruiter had been. I was the only one in the dark. As usual.
“Sometimes knowledge can be unsafe.” Murphy’s voice was a dangerous rasp, but Etain Feehery did not seem fazed.
“I agree, which is why I’m here to ask you point-blank what you plan on telling Jason Allerton when you collect him at the airport this afternoon.” Councilor Feehery took a sip of coffee and made a low sound of pleasure deep in her throat.
Sensual woman, that one. My mind did one of its intuitive leaps, and before I could censor myself I blurted, “You initiated Paddy’s wolf, didn’t you? And you used that connection when you recruited him.”
“He was well past initiation when I recruited him.” Her tone was blandly innocent, but I knew the truth of it now.
“But you still used that past connection.”
She regarded me over the rim of her coffee mug.
“Yes,” she agreed before she set it down next to mine on the coffee table. “A lot of the young men of this pack want me to initiate their wolves, but I only choose the best and brightest. Every single one of mine has ended up Alpha. And only one boy turned me down.” She gave Murphy a sultry smile. “And I’m still not over that, Liam.”
My face felt hot as the implications slammed into me. Had she set up Sorcha’s death to get Paddy in place as Alpha? Had she also been motivated by wounded pride because Murphy had declined her invitation to be initiated?
How was Murphy sitting so calmly across from her? How had he not throttled her ever since he’d discovered she was part of the Guardians?
“It’s a decision I’ve regretted, Etain.” Since she dropped his title, he dropped hers. “I wanted to be in love with the woman who initiated me, and while you’ve inspired a lot of emotions in me, love’s never been one of them.”
She threw back her head and laughed, and the scent of her shampoo—something clean and uncomplicated—drifted to me.
“Tell Allerton not to come.” Her laughter dried up as if it had never been.
“You’re well acquainted with Jason Allerton, Councilor. You tell me how I could get him to change his mind once it’s made up?” Murphy looked sincerely interested and slightly amused.
But there was nothing funny about any of this. Was Murphy enjoying this? Did he like this sort of bullshit game?
I’d been his bond mate for close to nine months, and I hardly knew him at all, it seemed. And what did he mean by “well acquainted”?
“Don’t tell me you were one of his mistresses, too.” Appalled, I clapped a hand to my mouth, but it was too damn late.
Etain Feehery laughed again and patted my knee. What a condescending bitch.
“Do I detect a whiff of jealousy? You another ex yourself, love? I wouldn’t have thought you were his type.”
“What the hell’s that supposed to mean?” I gaped at her. When it came down to it, I was prettier than she was. “Too young?”
“Too adoring. Adorable,” she said and gave me another fucking pat on the knee. Next time she touched me I would—yeah, right, do nothing. She was a powerful Councilor, and I couldn’t keep my damn mouth shut. “He can’t afford to have mistresses who are too wrapped up in him. He has nothing to offer, has he?”
“Councilor Allerton is bonded to Stanzie’s mother,” said Murphy.
Etain Feehery’s sherry-colored eyes widened.
“Oh, dear. You know, I knew about Erin. He did manage – just – to tell me after she died. I’d no idea he’d found a replacement yet.”
“She’s not a fucking replacement, she’s a person,” I muttered, and the damned woman patted my knee again. “What am I, your dog?” My temper snapped. “Next you’ll be feeding me bones and wanting to play fetch. I’m more likely to piss in your shoes.”
Murphy let out a strangled bark of laughter, and Etain Feehery regarded me for a moment.
“I’m sorry, Advisor,” she said and, for once, did not pat my knee. “I can be a bitch sometimes. I meant well. Jason Allerton doesn’t deserve someone like you. And if your mother’s anything like you, he just got very, very lucky.”
“I take it your affair ended badly?” I was slightly mollified but not enough to stop my curiosity.
She grinned and for a moment looked young and carefree, not like a powerful Councilor at all.
“Ah, it was a long while ago and I knew better than to fall in love, but I did anyway. It wasn’t his fault he didn’t reciprocate. He told me straight up how it would be with us, and I thought I could make it go my way, not his. More fool me.”
“Why don’t you want him here? Because of the past?” That probably wasn’t true, but wouldn’t it be nice? No more ugly complications with the conspiracy.
“Because he’s sticking his nose where it doesn’t belong.” Councilor Feehery became all business again, and the warmth in her eyes cooled. “This isn’t his territory, it’s mine.” The planes and angles of her face became predatory and harsh, and I shivered despite myself. This was not a woman to cross.
“I’m not happy he’s got two of my pack mates for Advisors either. Paddy O’Reilly was a fool to ask you into Mac Tire. You don’t belong here. After joining ranks with Allerton, you ought to have known better than to come back.” Her gaze shifted to Murphy.
A muscle twitched in Murphy’s clenched jaw. “We’re not going anywhere, Councilor.”
“Don’t be too sure of that, Advisor.” She rose to her feet and Murphy stood, too. They faced each
other across the coffee table, and I tensed miserably. When Murphy’s expression got all dark and dangerous like that, he scared me.
He followed her to the front door, and when she hesitated, he reached around and opened it for her.
“I’m telling you this for your own good, Liam. I didn’t have to come here.” Her voice was so low I had to strain to hear it.
“I don’t respond well to threats.” Murphy’s tone was flat. “What happened between Allerton and this pack was a long time ago. I suggest you get over it. Everyone else has.”
“Tell that bloody man to get back on the plane and go to America where he belongs.” Etain Feehery gave Murphy one long, last look and stalked out the door.
“What happened with Jason and this pack?” I barely let Murphy lock the door before I pounced.
He faced the door for a moment as if gathering his thoughts and then turned. “His first bond mate’s name was Erin Feehery.”
“Councilor Feehery’s—”
“Twin sister,” he finished for me grimly.
“So Councilor Feehery wasn’t one of his mistresses, was she?” It was a wonder the woman hadn’t spat in my face.
“No,” Murphy answered. “He met Etain first, but once he met Erin, all bets were off. He tore those two sisters apart. There was a lot of bad blood between Jason Allerton and this pack, Stanzie.”
“Still is apparently,” I said and Murphy’s expression turned grim.
“God, no wonder Paddy didn’t want to confide in her,” I said.
“Now can you see how hard everything’s been for the poor bastard?” Murphy asked and he looked so forlorn, I crossed the room to get to him so I could wrap my arms around his waist. He buried his face in my hair and we held each other for a long time, neither of us speaking.
Chapter 13
“Shit.” Paddy’s expletive was muffled. He had his face buried in his knees, his arms wrapped around his head as he sat on the dusty sofa in his office upstairs at An Puca.
I sat, tense and frustrated, in one of the battered armchairs while Murphy paced the length of the small room, his jaw and fists tightly clenched.
About Face (Wolf Within) Page 17