by Simon Lister
‘What is?’ Morveren asked.
‘Explaining things.’
‘You haven’t explained anything!’ Morveren said exasperated.
Merdynn looked offended and finished the apple grumbling to himself.
‘What happened on the Breton coast? What about Cei and Trevenna and the others?’ Ceinwen asked.
Merdynn sighed heavily, ‘Hasn’t Ethain explained it all to you?’
They exchanged glances before Ceinwen replied, ‘We haven’t found Ethain yet.’
‘What?’
‘We’re still searching for Ethain,’ she repeated.
‘What, still?’
‘Um, yes.’
Merdynn frowned.
‘What happened at the fortress?’ Morveren persisted with the same question.
Again Merdynn sighed. ‘You want to hear how they all escaped don’t you? How the others found some caves and hid there. Or how a boat from further up the coast came to their rescue. Or how they magically fought their way out, a handful against an army. Or how I came to their rescue with a boat from Wessex. Well, I didn’t. I was too late to save them and so they died. They put their faith in me and I failed them. This is the way of the world, there’s no unlikely ending to Cei’s tale. This isn’t one of my glorious stories of the past.’ He brought his eyes up to look at them and he immediately regretted letting his guilt lace his tone with spite; they looked distraught at his words.
‘But you lived. Perhaps they got away somehow too?’ Morveren said.
‘Yes, I lived. But then I am from the old tales and if you’d been listening you’d know we’re notoriously reluctant to die. I’ve seen so much but I never want to see another barren ground where friends have died waiting for me; died because I failed them. I didn’t want to see anything anymore but the choice was not mine and so here I am when others have gone. They’re dead. I’d give anything for it not to be so.’ Merdynn sighed deeply, ‘And yet you’ll still hope they lived somehow. Hope is always the last to die.’ He stood up and crossed to his scant possessions piled in one corner of the small hut. He returned and placed two items on the table; a war axe and a strange pendant hanging on a leather cord.
‘I found them on the Breton headland long after Sal had left. When the life returned to my body I searched for any sign of what had befallen our friends. This was all I found.’
‘Cei’s war axe!’ Morveren cried suddenly recognising the design of the longboat on the iron head.
Ceinwen had recognised the axe and she added quietly, ‘And that’s Arthur’s pendant, the one the Cithol girl gave him...’
‘...And which Arthur gave to Trevenna when they parted in the Shadow Lands,’ Merdynn finished and sat back down.
In the heavy silence that followed Merdynn poured them all another cup of wine, once again adding water to his. ‘Surely Sal told you about the fallen fortress months ago?’ he asked softly.
‘I haven’t had much of a chance to talk to him about it,’ Morveren admitted quietly.
‘Why ever not?’
‘Him and the other two joined Mar’h’s legion at the Haven.’
‘Mar’h’s formed a legion, eh? Perhaps I wasn’t wasting my breath after all.’
‘So Arthur’s not long had the message you sent via them,’ Morveren added cautiously.
‘So you’ve only just started to look for Ethain?’ Merdynn said incredulously.
‘Well, yes.’
‘Gods boil them alive!’ Merdynn erupted sending a mouthful of wine flying to the dirt of the floor.
‘Who?’ Morveren asked, alarmed by the outburst.
‘Your fool brothers, that’s who!’
‘If they’re still alive to boil,’ Morveren answered under her breath.
‘What do you mean?’
‘They’re with the legion fighting the Adren in the East.’
‘They’re in the Shadow Lands?’ Merdynn cried, shooting to his feet and knocking over his chair behind him.
‘No! The other side of the Winter Wood!’ Ceinwen replied quickly at last taking her eyes from the axe that lay on the table.
Merdynn composed himself, picked up his chair and sat back down, ‘Good, good. So Lazure hasn’t reached the Veiled City yet,’ Merdynn said to himself as he weighed the situation.
‘You’ve only just returned to Britain haven’t you?’ Ceinwen asked guardedly.
‘Yes. I presume Arthur’s gathered the people at Caer Sulis or the Haven?’ Despite the question it was clear that Merdynn was mulling over other thoughts.
‘Merdynn?’ Morveren said, fearing his reaction.
‘Yes?’ he answered absently, his mind still clearly elsewhere.
Morveren took a deep breath and glanced quickly at Ceinwen, ‘The Veiled City is destroyed.’
Merdynn stared at her.
‘The Cithol turned against us and threw their lot in with Lazure. At least Venning and Commander Kane did.’
Merdynn continued to stare dumbly at her. Morveren took a deep breath and continued, ‘So Arthur destroyed the whole city – at least what was left after the Adren sacked it. And most of the Winter Wood. And presumably most of the surviving Cithol too.’
Merdynn looked panic-stricken. He stared at Morveren with wide eyes and gripped the edge of the table with a strength that belied Ceinwen’s earlier opinion of his frailty.
‘What of Seren? What’s happened to Fin Seren?’ Merdynn almost whispered the question.
‘Seren?’ Morveren asked nonplussed.
Ceinwen flinched at the imminent outburst. Merdynn shot to his feet knocking over his chair for the second time and cried out the question again. Morveren flinched backwards as if she had been physically struck. With her heart racing Ceinwen stood up with deliberate slowness and held her hands up before Merdynn who now looked far from frail or absent-minded.
‘She’s safe, Merdynn, she’s safe. She’s at the Haven.’
‘And the child?’
‘You know she’s pregnant?’ Ceinwen asked in confusion, then seeing the danger in the old man’s eyes quickly added, ‘I don’t think she’s had the child yet...’
Merdynn strode to the doorway brushing her effortlessly aside. He stared up towards the sun gauging its position and then he seemed to sag against the doorway. When he turned back to them Ceinwen saw the dawning relief on his face. ‘Of course, it’s not her time yet. Soon, but not yet. But there’s no time to lose. I shan’t be late again.’ Merdynn was mumbling to himself as he sought about the hut gathering together his few possessions.
‘Quickly, tell me everything’s that happened since we parted in the Shadow Lands!’
‘Well, the king’s dead and Arthur’s forged an alliance with the Uathach...’ Ceinwen said fully expecting another fit of outrage.
‘Yes, yes, I heard that from Sal. Tell me everything else!’
Ceinwen started by telling him that Ruadan, her brother, had died at the Causeway then hurriedly backtracked and recounted the events from the beginning with Morveren adding parts as she left them out. Merdynn collected the food from the table then sat down impatiently as they continued their tale.
It took some time for them both to recount all the events that had led them to their search for Ethain and contrary to Ceinwen’s fears Merdynn seemed to become more patient as the story unfolded; at first he interrupted them with constant questions or demands for clarification but gradually his interjections gave way to nods or shakes of his head depending on how he took each new turn of events.
When they finished Merdynn sat in silence for a long time. Ceinwen would not have thought it possible but he somehow looked both relieved and worried at the same time; the furrowed lines had left his face and his posture was more relaxed but his eyes spoke of a deeper anxiety.
When he broke his silence he asked them further questions getting them to elaborate on certain aspects of what had happened and his questions always returned to Gwyna. He had never met her, even though she was the daughter of Ablach, and h
is ignorance of her appeared to worry him more than anything else did. Ceinwen was all too ready to admit that she held Arthur’s wife in little regard but she was nonetheless puzzled by Merdynn’s concentration on her and she chose her words carefully when he directly asked her what she thought of the Uathach girl.
‘She’s just a girl from an Uathach village. It’s a harsh life in those lands and it wouldn’t necessarily have been any easier for being the daughter of Ablach. There’s nothing remarkable about her except perhaps her ability to grab an excellent opportunity when one presents itself. She probably can’t believe her good luck in marrying the ruler of Britain – even if it’s all bound up with the Adren invasion. She won’t let much stand in the way of what she wants, she killed her father after all. I get the impression she’d rather have the chance of glory, despite the danger of losing everything, than have lived a safe life as a gift-wife for one of Ablach’s warriors.’
Merdynn’s frown returned at Ceinwen’s opinion and he asked Morveren if she felt the same way about her.
‘I don’t know about all that. Without her killing Ablach and taking charge of the Uathach then we’d have died on the Causeway so I don’t know about her motives, I know I don’t like her much but then I doubt many women do – most men would though, if you see what I mean.’
Ceinwen wondered if Morveren was inferring that she was jealous. Morveren was not even born when Ceinwen had been with Arthur but she had no doubt heard from Morgund or Mar’h about the time when she was.
She wondered uncertainly if she was in fact jealous and added, ‘It’s just an impression I got at the marriage feast. She just looked too delighted and smug considering she was marrying a stranger and she was furious when her father initiated the challenge through that Uathach warrior.’
‘Ablach was behind that?’ Morveren asked genuinely surprised. Ceinwen just looked at her as if she were simple.
To hide her embarrassment Morveren turned to Merdynn and took the subject away from Gwyna and back to Ethain, ‘What happened on the boat Merdynn? Your message said that Ethain betrayed you. How?’
Merdynn looked sharply at her, ‘Who else knows that?’
‘Just us two, and Sal of course, Arthur asked us to keep it quiet until he questioned him.’
‘Good. Tell no one.’
‘Were you and Cuthwin injured escaping from the Breton coast?’ Morveren asked, loath to admit her fears that Ethain had attacked his companions.
Merdynn sighed, clearly unwilling to answer the question. Morveren looked at him almost imploring him to deny her fears.
‘It’s best not to ask such questions,’ he finally said.
‘Why? Arthur will know when he talks to him,’ Ceinwen pointed out.
‘Yes he will and you must stay his hand. It’s desperately important that Ethain remains unharmed! Or at least that no further harm befalls him. Everything may hinge on the unhinged.’
‘Are you saying he’s gone mad?’ Morveren asked hoping that if he had indeed attacked Merdynn and Cuthwin then at least he may not be entirely responsible for his actions.
‘Mad or not, Arthur won’t stay his hand if he believes Ethain betrayed Cei and Trevenna.’
‘He must not harm him! Ethain and I are linked now and Britain’s fate may rest on that connection. Swear to me on your lives that you’ll not let Arthur kill him!’
Such was Merdynn’s anguish that they both swore to protect Ethain although neither knew what they would be able to do to stay Arthur’s wrath.
Ceinwen tried one more time, ‘Come back with us to Caer Cadarn – you’ll be able to stop Arthur if Ethain’s so important.’
‘Ethain is so important because I can’t go back with you. Even I cannot be in two places at the same time and my path now takes me away from Arthur. Whether Arthur saves Britain or not I still have my own task to fulfil. This is Arthur’s time, his destiny and I must look to another time, another destiny. I cannot go with you.’
‘Then where are you going?’ Morveren asked, only really understanding that Merdynn was saying goodbye.
Merdynn looked at them both sadly wishing it were otherwise. ‘The Haven, eventually. There is much to do and I must leave now.’
‘You’re going into the West!’ Ceinwen cried, appalled that Merdynn would leave Britain to its fate.
‘You must find Ethain soon,’ Merdynn said, averting his eyes and checking the food he had already packed away.
‘How? He could be anywhere!’ Morveren cried.
‘Can’t you help us? You said you had some connection to him,’ Ceinwen said, still shocked that Merdynn would leave Britain to its fate.
Merdynn stopped his rooting around in the saddlebag and looked intently at Ceinwen. ‘Yes. Perhaps. Possibly. Yes, I believe I can. Give me a few moments silence.’ He lowered his head and closed his eyes.
He remained motionless for so long that Ceinwen wondered if he had fallen asleep and she bent down to look into the old man’s face. She could see his eyes moving behind his eyelids. She straightened up and shrugged in reply to Morveren’s inquisitive look.
‘If he can tell where Ethain is then why didn’t he know that we hadn’t found him yet?’ Morveren whispered quietly.
‘Because, young Morveren, I’d rather assumed that a few months were enough for your idiot brothers to have delivered the message to their idiot sister and for their idiot sister to have found the simpleton,’ Merdynn replied without looking up.
‘So you’re awake then?’ Morveren answered smiling.
‘Oh course I’m bloody awake! I’m searching for Ethain!’
‘Any luck?’ Morveren asked not put out by his chiding.
Merdynn laughed and raised his head, ‘He’s stowed himself away in a gorge a few miles to the West of here. He’s been coming and going between there and this village, at least he was until I turned up here. Do you think your legendary tracking skills will be able to unearth him, Ceinwen?’
‘As you well know old man, I can track a ghost.’
‘Good, because you will be. Now, when you find him you must return to Caer Cadarn immediately. You must arrive there before Arthur returns. And, other than Arthur, tell no one that you’ve seen me – not even Ethain! And tell Arthur that no matter how far the Adren advance, he must stand against the tide!’
Merdynn stood up to leave and the two women got to their feet. They watched him as he crossed to the brightly lit doorway and he stopped as if to say something more but after a moment’s pause he just smiled and left. They hurried to the doorway and Ceinwen called out after the departing figure,
‘Do you want to take one of our horses?’
‘No need! I’ll find a pony – I’m uncommonly good with animals!’ he replied with a wave of his hand and without looking back.
Merdynn’s voice echoed and died in the deserted village and they watched him as he strode down the pathway and towards the wooded valley with their plundered food tied in a bundle and slung over his shoulder. They both felt sure they would never see him again.
Without speaking they saddled their horses and stowed away their gear. Ceinwen secured Cei’s axe to her horse’s flanks and placed the Elk Stone safely in one of her pockets.
Whatever growing antipathy they had felt towards each other before arriving at the village had been completely annulled by their meeting with Merdynn. It was Ceinwen who summed up what they both felt some hours later as they made their way over the rolling hills towards the gorge, ‘I’ve never felt so happy and yet so sad. Just seeing Merdynn alive has given me new hope but I still can’t believe he’s abandoning Arthur.’
‘Has he always talked in such riddles? What could be more important than helping Arthur against the Adren?’
‘I’ve no idea what he’s implying most of the time but clearly he feels that his presence would make no difference to whether we’ll stand or fall. Presumably his presence will make a difference elsewhere.’
‘I still can’t believe Ethain turned against the oth
ers or how he can have any crucial role in the battle against the Adren. It’s not as if he’s ever been a great warrior or anything.’ Morveren was still desperate to believe that Ethain was somehow innocent of her suspicions.
‘Remember to keep what Merdynn said to yourself! If the Anglians even suspect that Ethain somehow betrayed Cei then he’s as good as dead.’
‘How on earth are we going to stop Arthur cutting his throat?’ Morveren asked hopelessly.
‘I’ll talk to him.’
Morveren snorted in response.
‘Fair enough,’ Ceinwen conceded then added quietly, ‘If it comes to it then I’ll stand in his way.’
‘Then he’ll kill you too.’
Their talk of Arthur reminded them both of their previous argument.
‘He won’t kill me,’ Ceinwen said with conviction.
‘How can you be so sure? Oh. You still love him, don’t you?’ Morveren asked looking across at her friend.
‘I’ve been married to Andala for twenty years!’ Ceinwen said defensively then corrected herself, ‘Was married.’
‘I’m not judging or criticising,’ Morveren said hastily.
Ceinwen kept her eyes on the path ahead both horrified that her friend had so casually voiced the thought she had kept private for so long and yet longing to admit it aloud.
Morveren waited a while before asking, ‘Why didn’t you stay together?’
Ceinwen shrugged, ‘It was a long time ago. We were young. We spent a winter apart and by the time the sun returned he was with,’ she hesitated, ‘someone else.’
Morveren knew instinctively why she had hesitated.
‘He was with my mother wasn’t he?’
Ceinwen nodded.
‘She must have been a good deal older than him,’ Morveren said attempting to sound matter of fact.
Ceinwen sighed, ‘He was about your age, she mine.’
‘That’s what I mean.’
Ceinwen smiled, acknowledging the attempt to lighten what was undoubtedly an awkward moment, while Morveren fell silent uncertain what to feel and having to re-evaluate some of her previous judgements. She thought about her feelings for Morgund and wondered if perhaps her mother and Arthur had felt the same way about each other; if the future was so uncertain then perhaps you lived with little regard for it. If tomorrow could bring your death then perhaps you lived only for today. Morveren glanced across at her friend trying to imagine how she would have looked at her own age and then tried to imagine a younger Arthur. She found it easier to picture Ceinwen as a teenager than Arthur; she simply could not imagine Arthur was ever a young man. Perhaps, she thought, no one could envisage their parents as being young and she turned to Ceinwen to finally ask the question she had never voiced, ‘Is Arthur my father?’