“Oh, Em,” Janie said. “I promise you. He doesn’t just say things like that to women. He’s a charmer, yes, but he would never lead someone on. To my knowledge, he’s never said things like that to anyone. It’s always just been fun and games with him and he’s never been serious about a girl before, but we all see the attraction that he has for you. And it’s not just physical. He likes you, you know? Likes talking to you. He sounded so depressed on the phone and I know it wasn’t a case. He doesn’t let cases get to him like that. It had to be you. If he’s saying the things you mentioned, then that’s his way of letting you know how important you are. Especially given what he said to you when you last saw him. And Em,” she said, “he won’t call. He respects you too much and he’ll want you to come to him when you’re ready. So go to him. Be honest with him.”
All of the girls were nodding.
“That’s what he keeps saying to me. He knows I haven’t been honest with him.” Had she totally screwed this up? “I’m just so scared,” she whispered. “I hate the fact that I’m such a coward.”
“When I was trying to figure out stuff with Jeremy,” Ryann began, “it was my mom who slapped me into shape and so now it’s up to us to pass along the same wisdom that she gave me. It basically comes down to this: You won’t know until you talk to him, Em. If you’ve been looking for a man who’ll understand you, who’ll accept you for you, I think you’ve found him. You just have to go get him and see where it takes you. You won’t know until you tell him, until you try this thing. Is it terrifying? Yes. But are you really gonna live your life wondering about what could’ve been? You need to give him the benefit of the doubt here. Maybe he’s been looking for someone who’ll understand him too.”
Emily’s memory was sent back to the night at her apartment and the conversation they’d had on the sofa. About how he hadn’t felt completely understood as a kid.
Janie was wiping her eyes. As Emily looked around the table and wiped hers as well, Ryann, surprisingly, was the only one whose eyes weren’t wet. And she was usually the crier in the bunch.
“I need to talk to him,” Emily finally said.
“Yes, you do,” Ayanna said. “Today.”
“I’ll text him tonight. He’ll have the training and then I’m sure he’s gonna need some sleep. But I’ll definitely text him tonight.”
“Good,” Ayanna said. All of the women at the table seemed to take a collective cleansing breath. “Well. Okay then. It’s five o’clock somewhere. Who needs another drink?”
Just as Ayanna raised her hand for the waiter to bring more mimosas, they all noticed Jeremy, Luke, Drew and Jonathan walking over to the table. Emily immediately looked for Mike, but didn’t see him.
“Hey!” Ayanna said. “You crashin’ our party?” She leaned back for a kiss from Jon.
“You mentioned where you’d be, so we thought we’d swing by,” Jon said before planting one on Ayanna’s lips.
“Where’s Mike?” Ryann asked Jeremy as he kissed her hello. At the same time, she squeezed Emily’s hand under the table.
“He’s just parking his bike. Jon, Luke and Drew drove with me.”
They all began to shuffle so the guys could fit at the table. Tiffany was all aflutter, looking sick to her stomach as Drew pushed his way in to sit next to her, while Luke put a chair between his sister and Janie.
There was a buzz of conversation, but all Emily could think about was Mike and what would happen when he walked in. She swallowed, trying to tamp down the panic.
“It looks like you’re feeling better,” she heard Drew say to Tiffany.
“Were you sick?” she heard Luke’s voice ask his sister.
Just breathe. Breathe.
Mike walked in the entrance and began looking around. Emily’s eyes immediately latched onto him, gobbling him up with her eyes. He looked tired, drawn, with dark circles under his eyes. When he turned his head and finally saw them in the back, his eyes clashed with hers.
She could see his lips form the word ‘shit’ just before he took a deep breath and began walking toward the table. His eyes slipped from hers and zeroed in on Jeremy’s, looking annoyed.
A round of ‘heys’ sounded from the table as he approached and people began to move to make room for him.
“Well, this is a pleasant surprise,” Mike said, even though his face didn’t show the ‘pleasant’, only the ‘surprise’. “I didn’t know you girls would be here.” He had a tight smile on his face and glared at Jeremy.
“We didn’t tell you?” Jeremy asked innocently. He turned to Jon. “I thought we told him we were gonna see the girls.”
“Me too,” Jon said just as innocently, then shrugged and looked at Mike. His look said What are ya gonna do, buddy?
During the shuffle of chairs, an empty one finally emerged next to Emily.
“No, you didn’t mention it,” Mike said. “Either way, don’t make room for me because I can’t stay. I remembered I had to go back to work to do some things to wrap up a case. So,” Mike began, his eyes skimming past Emily, “I’ll see you guys.” His lips pressed into a semblance of a smile even though it appeared more like a grimace and he waved goodbye, turned his back and strode out of the restaurant.
Everyone was quiet and seemed to be looking in Emily’s direction. Ayanna smacked her thigh under the table.
“Go,” she whispered as people began to talk to cover up the awkwardness.
Emily took a deep breath. Well, there was no better time than the present to have this conversation, she figured, even though terror gripped her heart and her palms were sweating. She got up and tossed her napkin on the table, rifling through her purse to put some money on the table.
“We got it,” Ryann said. “Just go.”
Emily looked at the table of friends, said she had to run, and did just that out of the restaurant. When she was on the sidewalk, she looked frantically for Mike but didn’t see him. She heard the engine of a bike start and turned in that direction, seeing him put on his helmet.
Shit.
She began jogging toward him and as she got closer, she yelled his name.
But he hadn’t heard her, the rumble of the bike and City traffic only drowning her out. He’d already pulled out onto the street and was gone.
Chapter 16
Emily’s stomach was in knots. It was 9:30pm. She’d texted Mike two hours earlier asking him if he’d had time to talk and he still hadn’t gotten back to her.
Maybe he was sleeping.
Or maybe he doesn’t want to talk to you. You’re an idiot, Em. Either he’s pissed at you or he was playing you. The sex wasn’t as great as he led you to believe. You’re not that special. He’s just really good at making women feel like they are. The demon on her shoulder continued to whisper in her ear and she wanted to smash him into the floor.
Don’t chicken out. Follow it through. See what happens. She much preferred listening to the angel on the other shoulder.
She looked at the clock. It was now approaching 9:45. She didn’t want to text him again. She’d wait and see if he would contact her. Maybe she’d waited too long and he was done with her.
She would take a shower. That would eat up some time.
Ten minutes later, she got out and dried her hair. Then she put on her glasses and some pajamas and went back out to the living room.
Still no calls on her phone.
She sighed. She’d screwed this up. She should’ve been brave enough to be honest with him. She really had been a chickenshit. He’d been accusing her of that since their rematch weeks ago and he’d been right. What he hadn’t realized was that she’d been a chickenshit for a whole lot longer than that.
She flopped onto the sofa and stared at her phone. It was after 10pm and she wasn’t holding out hope she’d get a call. She tossed down the phone and went to her room where she called it a night.
……
She slept horribly. When she finally crawled out of bed at the crack of dawn to use the bath
room, she thought she’d need toothpicks to keep her eyelids propped open.
She could tell it was going to be one of those days. In fact, she didn’t even bother going out to the kitchen to make the coffee. She just wanted to crawl into a hole and die. She went back to bed and fell asleep.
She finally got up around 10. She now understood when people said someone could die of a broken heart. She felt like someone had been sitting on her chest making each breath a labor. Like Terrence had said, she was the walking dead, going through the motions while she counted out the cups of water and the scoops of coffee.
Once it was set to brew, she went out to the living room.
Where the light was blinking on her phone.
Her breathing picked up and she felt like she was going to pass out. She quickly walked over and looked at the phone, noticing that she’d missed a call from Mike at a little after one in the morning. There was a voicemail.
As soon as the recording began playing, Emily could hear music in the background. There was ambient noise, like glasses clinking and a din of people talking. It sounded like he was in a bar or a restaurant. Just as she realized the song playing in the background was Crash by Dave Matthews, Mike’s voice came onto the recording.
“GC?” he slurred. “Em? Hi, baby. Where are you? I’m still waiting. Why aren’t you coming to the the trainings anymore?” His words all ran together.
He had drunk dialed her. She bit her lip and listened.
“Baby? Em? God, seeing you today,” he began. “Jon said you were out on a date last night.” He sounded tortured. “I thought you didn’t want to see anyone else. Why are you goin’ out on dates?”
She began crying. He took a big loud breath and continued talking.
“You looked tired. Are you okay?” His words began to slur again. “Why aren’t you coming to the trainings anymore? You were at the restaurant. Rene keeps saying you have plans. Is that what you’re doing? Going out with the girls? Is that why you’re not coming? Or are you with that IT guy from work?” he moaned. “Jon said he saw you. Where are you?”
She heard someone calling him in the background.
“Why don’t you want me anymore, Em? I’m supposed to keep you warm so you don’t have to wear your pjs,” he slurred. “Who’s gonna keep you warm? I don’t want you to see that dick anymore, do you hear? I don’t like the way he talks to you. Dickless wonder,” he mumbled. “Next time you see him, you kick his ass. Then I’ll kick his ass. Okay?”
Tears were trickling down her cheeks as she listened to him speak about whom she could only assume was Scott.
“And who’s this douche who was tryin’ to take off your clothes?” Mike was yelling into the phone, but she had no idea what he was talking about. “That guy who Rene said you met yesterday. I’m the only one who gets to take off your clothes, Em.”
Oh, geez. Was he talking about Vincent Strover? Rene must’ve shared the meeting with all of the guys at the training.
“I lied to you, GC. Do you wanna hear a little secret?” he whispered dramatically, completely inebriated. “GC doesn’t mean ‘Gorgeous Counselor’. Shh. It was my little secret. Do you know what it means? It means,” he began then took a dramatic drunken pause, “it means ‘Game Changer’. Because you’re my game changer, Em. Did you know that?”
Omigod. Omigod. Omigod. She held her hand over her mouth and sobbed quietly.
She heard someone talking to him in the background.
“No, Joey,” Mike said to someone in the background, sounding dejected, drunk and close to tears. “This is exactly why you don’t fall in love,” he moaned in agony.
There was a scuffle for the phone and the line disconnected.
She gripped her stomach and fell forward, crying until she didn’t think she could cry anymore.
She needed to find him. She grabbed her phone and called him.
She paced while waiting for him to pick up. It went to voicemail.
“Grr!” she yelled in frustration. She left a message. “Mike, please call me when you get this. It’s Emily. Please call me, okay?”
Once she disconnected, she texted the same message then ran into the bedroom to change into a sweatshirt and jeans. She would find him. She would sit outside his apartment if necessary, but she would find him.
Maybe she should call Jeremy.
Her phone rang and she grabbed it like a lifeline. It was Mike.
“Mike!” she answered.
“Uh, hey. Is this Ninja Girl?”
“Who is this? Where’s Mike?”
“It’s Dwight Lacey. Cag’s partner?”
“Lacey?” she asked in a slight panic. “Is he okay?”
“That’s debatable,” he said dryly. “Is he alive? Yes. Is he shitfaced drunk at 10:30 in the morning? That would also be a yes.”
“Where are you?”
“Joey, the bartender over at Cal’s left me a message really early this morning. Apparently, Cag stayed ’til closing last night and got drunk and Joey put him in a cab, but he called me to make sure someone checked up on him. So when I called Cag this morning, he didn’t answer. I went to his place, let myself in and he wasn’t there. Then Joey called me just as I’m about to put out a search and says Cag’s at the bar again. He stumbled in saying he was there to pick up his bike, but then grabbed a bottle off the bar and started drinkin’. So,” he sighed with some humor, “thus ends the pitiful tale.”
“Where’s Cal’s?”
“It’s a cop bar right around the corner from the precinct.” He gave her the cross streets.
“I’m on my way.”
“Listen, um, the only reason I called was because I saw you texted him last night and then just now and I’m fairly certain he didn’t see them because if he had, he wouldn’t be wallowing in his inebriated state at the moment.”
“I’m glad you called. I’m leaving right now.”
“And hey, um –”
“Spit it out, Lacey.” She was anxious to get going.
He chuckled, but then got serious. “I’m happy to take him home and even though I know he really wants to see you, can I just say something? If you’re not, you know, interested or anything, it’ll be better if you don’t come. I’ll just take him home or call Jeremy. I just thought maybe since you texted him, you changed your mind. He told me you’d broken it off –”
“I’m coming right now. I’ll be there as soon as I can. Don’t let him leave. Please. And thank you. Thank you so much for calling me.”
“You got it,” he said sounding relieved. Happy. “Good then. See you soon, Ninja Girl.”
……
She took the 15 minute cab ride and pulled up outside of Cal’s bar, then asked the cabbie to wait before walking in. Quickly scanning the tables, she saw Lacey and Mike sitting toward the back. There were two cups of coffee in front of them and Mike had his head down on the table.
She walked over.
“Thank God,” Lacey said dryly.
“Thanks, Lacey. I’ll take it from here.”
The relief and love she felt at that moment pulsed through her. She reached out and put her hand in Mike’s hair, rubbing his scalp, stroking his hair and trying to wake him from his stupor.
He reached up and touched her hand then opened his eyes. She squatted down so she was eye level with him.
His eyes were completely bloodshot, his hair stood up on end and he had several days of stubble on his jaw. He broke out into a huge grin and for a second her heart stopped at how happy she was to see him. She grinned back. He looked wonderful.
“Hi,” he said and lifted his head. His hand took her hand from his hair and brought it to his mouth to kiss it. “Hi,” he said again, pulling her between his legs. “You’re so beautiful,” he said, nuzzling her hand.
She chuckled. “Hi, Detective. Come on. I’m gonna get you home,” she said as she sifted her fingers through his hair.
“Okay,” he slurred. He turned to Lacey then said with a smile. “Look, Lace. It
’s my GC. She’s here to take me home. She’s wearing her glasses. Doesn’t she have sexy eyes?”
“Yeah, buddy,” he smirked. “She does. Let’s get you in the cab.” He reached down to help him up.
“She came over to get me,” Mike smiled drunkenly. “Because she likes me. She loves me, but she doesn’t wanna talk about it yet. I have to give her time.” He lightly patted Lacey’s cheek.
Both she and Lacey smiled sheepishly at each other, slightly embarrassed at the turn in the conversation.
“But listen,” Mike continued as he pointed in Lacey’s face, stumbling slightly. “There’s this guy. His name’s Scott the Dickless Wonder. And my girl here is gonna kick – his – ass.” He punctuated each word with a finger jab. “And then you and I are gonna kick his ass, okay Lace? We’re all gonna go over to that law firm and we’re gonna watch my baby take – him – down. Because nobody talks to my girl that way. No way, no how. And then we’re gonna go to that hospital. Whoever that doctor is,” he slurred, waving his hand with a flourish.
Emily couldn’t help herself as a fit of giggles overcame her. He was beyond adorable as a drunk.
Lacey looked at her and rolled his eyes. “Okay, buddy. Come on.”
“Alrightletsgothen,” Mike said, all of his consonants forming one big word. “You hold him down first, then I’ll home him down,” Mike said slowly, mispronouncing ‘hold’ in his drunken state. “Then we’ll home him down and Emily’ll do some karate chops on him.”
“Okay, Cag. We’ll ‘home’ him down tomorrow. Right now, Emily is gonna get you outta here.”
“She is?” Mike asked turning to Emily. “You are? Good. Come on, Em. Let’s go home. Are you gonna take me home?”
They’d finally gotten him out to the cab and then wrangled him into the back seat. Before she got in, Lacey spoke.
“Do you want me to come with you? He’ll need some help up the stairs at his place.”
Revelation: A Contemporary Erotic Romance (Iris Series) Page 25