by Lizzie James
“I just want him to be okay.” She took a spoon for herself, turning her head to face me. “I just didn’t see him getting that upset over it.” She frowned down at her lap before she looked back at me. “Did we make the right decision? I mean, if we are hurting people…?”
“Are you regretting what we—”
“No!” she shrieked. “No. It’s just…” She huffed. “I just didn’t see this blowing up in our faces, I guess.”
“I have an idea,” I said. “How about we stop worrying about everyone else and start being us. I’m sorry we hurt Christopher, but I’m not going to apologise for going after what I want.”
She stared up at me for a few moments.
“What’s wrong?” I cocked my head at her. “You’re looking at me funny.”
“Sorry.” She laughed at me. “I just… I’ve thought about you looking at me like this so many times and now that you are… It doesn’t feel real.”
I smiled at her.
“I feel like I’m going to wake up at any minute and this will have all been a dream.” She blushed at her words and I knew that she was telling me the truth.
“I have a lot to make up for, haven’t I?” I muttered, mostly to myself but she still answered me.
“No.” She shook her head, lifting her hand and stroked the hair back from my forehead. “I just want him to be okay.”
“I know. He will be, Laur.” I blew out a breath. “So, am I allowed to kiss you yet or what?” I was teasing her, but I had to try and make light of this messed up situation.
“I guess that would be okay.” She grinned up at me and tilted her face up to mine.
I slowly moved my head down, bringing my lips close to hers. I don’t know why I was moving so slowly with her. If she was any other girl, I wouldn’t be acting so careful with them.
I pressed my lips to hers, kissing her softly. I tilted my head, sucking her bottom lip into my mouth. I placed my hand against her neck, controlling the kiss a little before tangling my fingers in the long, dark strands of her hair.
She gasped against my lips before she parted them. Her tongue darted out and pressed against mine. She tasted of chocolate, and I knew it was a taste I would probably become addicted to. Kissing her was going to be my drug of choice.
I moved my hand down her side, loving the feel of her beneath me.
Suddenly, she ripped her lips from mine with a shriek. “Oh, that’s cold!” She grabbed the tipped over tub of ice cream that was soaking into the blanket. She giggled as she looked up at me.
“What a waste,” I joked.
“Not funny.” She stood, leaving me on the sofa as she disappeared into the kitchen.
As I watched her ass walk away from me, I could feel myself getting hard. Looking at Lauren in that way still felt a little strange for me but as she returned, it was something I was glad for. I just had to get my head straight and start merging my new feelings for the woman in front of me with the girl that had been with me since we were children.
“You okay?” she asked. She stopped a few steps away from me. “You look like you’re a million miles away.”
“Just thinking.” I smiled up at her as my eyes trailed up her body.
“About what?” she asked. She now had a frown on her face.
“Come here.” I tapped my knee and held my hand out for her. I settled her small body across my lap and wrapped my arms around her to keep her there. “I was just thinking of how things have changed for us so quickly.”
“They have. Were you thinking about it in a bad way?” She sounded and looked nervous.
I could see the thoughts written on her face. I could see she was worried I was changing my mind about us.
“In a good way.” I stroked the hair back from her neck, sweeping it behind her down her back. “I just kind of wish I had seen it earlier. It took Luke and my mother to point it out to me.” I laughed embarrassingly.
“I don’t think it was them,” she whispered. She shook her head at me. “I think things started changing a little when I started dating Christopher.” Her eyes flicked down to my chest before she shrugged her shoulders. She reached out and stroked her finger near my collarbone in random patterns.
“I wasn’t jealous,” I lied.
“I like that you were. I quite like the thought of you getting jealous over me.”
“Fine.” I rolled my eyes. “If me being jealous makes you happy then I may admit to being a little jealous. Just a smidge.” I held my thumb and forefinger a couple of centimetres apart for comedic effect.
She giggled, dipping her head and kissed me before pulling back.
“Have you spoken to Cindy yet? I mean, have you told her about…” She looked flustered.
“Cindy?” I asked, confused. “Um, well I broke it off with her when you and Christopher were… together.” I shrugged my shoulders disappointedly. “She told me that I had no chance with you.”
“Why?” She wrapped her arms around my shoulders as she looked down at me. “Why would she say that?”
“Uh…” Fuck, why did I have to bring this up now? “She told me…” I said as I leaned my head against the back of the sofa. “She said I had no chance with you because she and I… Well, we…”
“Because you had sex with her in your bedroom?” she asked in a deadpanned tone.
I laughed. “Yes. Pretty much.” I stroked my thumb over her T-shirt covered hip. “I’m sorry,” I apologised.
“Stop apologising,” she chastised me. “We can’t change what happened in the past. All that we can change is the future now.”
I leaned up and kissed her, humming against her lips before pulling back.
“That sounds like a deal to me.”
13
Lauren
Lying in bed that night, sleep kept evading me. It was almost one am, and I had been waking up every hour since I left Thomas in front of the television watching a movie on Netflix. I’d been so tired sitting next to him that I had decided on an early night.
I stared out of the window, watching the snowflakes falling in the dark sky. As I lay there, I started thinking of what we would be doing for dinner on Christmas Day. We normally spent it with Thomas’s mother at her house, but I decided that it could be nice to have it here instead.
I closed my eyes to try and fall back to sleep, deciding to mention it tomorrow to Thomas and see what he thought. I froze when I heard movement near my door. Turning over, I frowned when I saw Thomas sneaking in.
“What are you doing?” I croaked out.
“Did I wake you?” he asked. He came over to the other side of my bed, pulling the blanket back and crawling in. “I couldn’t sleep.” He wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled my body to his so we were spooning.
I smiled into the pillow, loving the way he was holding me. I also loved that he had been the one to seek me out.
“I didn’t know bad boy Thomas Danvers enjoyed cuddles,” I mocked.
“Shut it.” He dipped his head down and kissed my shoulder, causing sparks to explode. “I’ve only ever cuddled with you.” His naked chest pressed against my back as he tightened his arm around my waist. “Sweet dreams, Lauren.” He lay his head on the pillow and rested his chin against the top of my head.
“Good night, Thomas,” I whispered. I covered his hand with mine, smiling when he entwined our fingers, and as I closed my eyes, I realised that in all my silly daydreams and fantasies of the day when Thomas and I would be together, I’d never felt as happy as I felt right here, in his arms.
Waking up the next morning, I smiled when I smelt bacon. Turning over, I felt Thomas’s side of the bed and noticed that it wasn’t warm. He had obviously been up for a while.
I climbed out of bed and headed to the kitchen, grinning when I saw him. He was dressed in only a pair of jogging bottoms and was dividing his attention between making some juice, grilling the bacon and mixing some pancake mix. I couldn’t stop my eyes from trailing down his back and stopping at his
way too perfect ass.
I tip-toed over to him and slipped my arms around his waist. “Something smells yummy!” I kissed in between his shoulder blades before stepping back. “I think you are one pancake away from burning the kitchen down, though.”
He turned to me with a look of disappointment on his face and I hated it.
“I was trying to surprise you.” He moved the bacon onto a plate. “I made your favourite: juice, bacon extra crispy and chocolate chips for the pancakes.”
“What’s this?” I asked. I turned towards him and reached my hand up, stroking the hair back from his face. “It’s only breakfast.”
“I know.” He reached up and placed his hand over my wrist. “I just wanted to do something nice for you.” He leaned down and kissed the inside of my wrist. “You’re always doing nice stuff, and I just thought it’d be nice for me to return the favour.”
“Well, finding you like this in the kitchen first thing in the morning is definitely nice.” I trailed my eyes down over his chest before stopping on his abs. “Really nice.”
He laughed loudly. “It’s because I’m so sexy, isn’t it?” He took a step forward, backing me up against the worktop. He leaned his hands on either side of me, caging me in.
“So cocky,” I muttered. I entwined my arms around his neck, grinning when the action brought our upper bodies closer together.
“I could say something inappropriate in response, but I am far too mature for that.” His hands bunched the top up at my back and seconds later, I felt his fingers against my bare skin.
I laughed loudly in response to his words, trying to ignore the sparks that exploded beneath my skin from where he was touching me.
“Are you hungry?” he asked.
I stared into his eyes, stroking my fingers in a small circle in the middle of his back. “I’m hungry for you,” I whispered. It may have sounded like I was being forward but I wasn’t. I was never usually confident enough to say those words to anyone, but as I looked into his eyes, I realised it was true. I was hungry for him. I had been hungry for him for so long. “Kiss me, Thomas,” I whispered. I moved my hands down his body, trailing my fingers over his rib cage before moving them around to his lower back. I smiled up at him, feeling bold enough to take a step closer and to grasp the cheeks of his ass, pulling him towards me. The way he was looking down at me made me think he liked this side of me.
His eyes were hooded, and I hoped it was lust I was seeing reflected back at me.
“This confident side of you is kind of sexy.” He dipped his head and kissed me, sucking my bottom lip into his mouth. He stepped towards me, moving my legs wide enough apart for him to fit in between.
I parted my lips, moaning when I felt his tongue enter my mouth and entwine with mine. The kiss started shy but it became quickly passionate and warm. With his lips on mine, I felt things that I never thought I would feel for anyone.
His hand pressed against my cheek, holding me closer to him. He pulled back, staring at my mouth. “Are you hungry?” he gritted out. His tone was gruff and impatient, but his expression was patient and gentle.
Was he seriously asking me if I was hungry for breakfast? I must have stared at him for too long when he quickly continued.
“If you’re hungry, I’ll feed you but if you’re not…” His eyes moved down to my chest before coming back up. “If you’re not, I’m going to take you somewhere we can get more comfortable.”
“I want you,” I whispered. I nodded my head, tightening my grip around his shoulders. “I want you,” I said, repeating my words more forcefully until I felt him lift me and start walking us out of the kitchen. I half expected him to take us to one of our bedrooms, but he surprised me by taking us into the lounge instead. He tightened his arm around my waist and slumped down on the sofa, bringing my body down with him.
“Uh, this is…” I stared down in embarrassment between us as I saw that he was hard. I didn’t know why I was suddenly thinking it, but whenever I’d imagined us together, him being turned on by me had never been a part of it. Now that it was happening, I was beginning to feel a little overwhelmed.
“Problem?” he asked. He smirked up at me, and I knew he could probably guess at how embarrassed I was.
“You’re uh…” I leaned back, dropping my ass into the gap between his legs and getting myself comfier as my knees on each side of him took my weight. “I didn’t expect you to be—”
“Hard?” He cocked an eyebrow, a stupid grin on his face, and I could see he was enjoying my embarrassment a little.
“I’m sorry! Of all times I imagined us together, I never saw you as…” My eyes flicked down before moving back up to his eyes. “I never saw this happening.”
“I see.” He reached out and rested his hand on my hip before he began rubbing his thumb over it. “So, whenever you imagined me finally pulling my head out of my ass and seeing you as more than my book nerd of a friend…” We both giggled until his face fell back into a serious expression. “You never saw us getting this far?” he asked me.
“No,” I timidly replied. “I never lied to myself about us, Thomas.” I placed my hands on his chest, feeling the muscles of his chest bunch beneath my touch. “I never expected this. I may have thought more of you than as a friend for a long time but I never fooled myself into thinking that we would ever be anything more than that.”
“I’ve had sex with a lot of women, Lauren.”
“Thomas, I don’t need you to explain yourself to me.” I looked down and stared at my leg. “I don’t need you to apologise for anything in the past. I just…” I stopped talking when he reached up and placed his finger beneath my chin. He turned my face up, bringing my gaze back to his.
“I’ve had sex with a lot of women,” he said, carefully repeating his words back to me. He stared into my eyes for a moment until he spoke again. “Lauren, I need you to know I have never felt this way for any of them. Never.” He shook his head to emphasise his point. “What I feel for you – what I am starting to feel for you – is more of me than they ever got.” He rubbed his hand up the outside of my leg. “I don’t want us to rush into anything.”
“You’re used to having sex,” I whispered. “Lots of it.”
“I am.” He slumped his head back against the cushion behind him. “I can be patient. I don’t want us to rush into anything. I mean…” He blew out a breath, his shoulders slumping a little. “I want you and you want me, but there’s no rush, is there?” He rested his hand on my thigh. “I mean, this is for real, right? This isn’t a one-time thing for us. I mean, this is it. This is a chance for us to have a future together, and it’s a future I don’t want us to rush.”
“I just don’t think I’m ready yet. I want you. I just want it to be special.”
“Don’t apologise,” he whispered. “I can be patient.” He grinned, leaning up and bringing his head eye level with my chest. “Kissing me will make me more patient, though.”
I slowly lowered my head to his, humming against his lips as his tongue entered my mouth, entwining with mine. He placed his hands on my hips before I felt him move back against the cushion, pulling my hips against him, moaning against my lips. I felt his hardness between us as he tilted his hips, rubbing against me. I moaned at the friction as I ground against him.
“Ah, fuck.” He pulled his lips from mine, reaching up and roughly grasping my breasts over my T-shirt. He squeezed them, his lustful gaze staying on my chest. “You’re so beautiful,” he gasped. “So fucking beautiful.”
I wasn’t a highly sexual person, but as he touched me, I knew that when we did finally come together sexually, that the moment would be raw, intense and explosive because of what Thomas and I shared.
I reached up and placed my hands over his, stopping his actions. “Thomas, stop,” I whispered. I chuckled as his lustful gaze met mine. “We just talked about being patient.” I giggled.
“I’m sorry.” He laughed. “I didn’t realise how much I wanted you—how good
you feel on top of me.” He grasped my hips and pulled me down gently, grinding me against him.
I bent to kiss him again, halfway to just saying ‘fuck it’ and dragging him to my bedroom when I jumped in surprise as our front door banged open. I shrieked in surprise, scaring the crap out of Thomas and our visitor.
“Oh crap!” Luke laughed in our doorway before he closed the door. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt you.” He pulled his key out of the lock before he turned and stopped at our side. He placed his hands on his hips with a cocky grin, looking down at us. “Well, this is different.” He waved his finger in between us before he took a seat on the sofa, leaving a small gap in between him and us. “So, what’s happening?”
I quickly crawled off Thomas in embarrassment and walked to the kitchen.
“Why the fuck do you have a key?” I heard Thomas ask him as I made us some coffee. I popped the mugs on a tray with some biscuits and took them into the lounge, holding them out to Thomas and grinning when he took three chocolate chip cookies.
“Greedy jerk,” Luke insulted before he grabbed his mug and took only one biscuit. “Thank you, sugar.” He gave me a cheeky wink as he dunked his biscuit into his mug and took a bite.
“So, what’s up?” Thomas asked, directing his question to Luke.
“I have a favour to ask.” He turned his body a little to face Thomas. “I need you to cover my shift today.”
“Sure,” he asked. “What’s wrong?”
“I, uh…” His eyes flicked to me sitting in the armchair. “Christopher has asked to see me today. I think I know what’s it about, but I just need the time to have a proper talk with him. Is that okay?”
“Sure, man.” Thomas nodded his head and looked over at me.
I knew what he was thinking. There was a chance that Christopher may not be comfortable working at Dominic’s anymore, but I really didn’t think that it would ever come to that.