by Brogan, Kim
Henry opened the door and we were immediately greeted by Robert. “Welcome to Sloane House, Miss McGee, your Lordship.”
The foyer was massive with the staircase set off to the left. “Miss McGee, would you like to sit in the reception room or perhaps the library while Lord Guilford attends to the seating arrangements?”
A woman burst into the room. She was about my age and agitated. Her short blonde hair, cut in a modern angle, flew up as she sprinted towards Henry. “Henry, this is unacceptable! You should have been here ages ago.” She finally caught me in her crossbows. “Oh, pardon me. I’m Sarah, Henry’s very angry sister.”
Henry put an arm protectively around me. “Sarah, this is Maggie McGee. I’m here now. What’s the problem?”
“They’ve put Kera Mymms next to Lord Wently.”
Henry chuckled, “Well, Lady Wently won’t appreciate that. So change them around.”
We both saw the exasperated look on her face.
Henry exhaled in frustration. “Fine, Maggie, would you excuse me while I deal with this national crisis? If I were you, I’d choose the library, at least there’s a television in there.”
Robert motioned forward and then led me through two twelve foot doors and into a “reception” room the size of the entire downstairs’ floor of my parent’s house. We went through a second set of doors into a short hallway and into a library. It had a desk, leather couch, wingback chairs and a large flat-screen television.
I was shown to the couch and then Robert took off. Within minutes a woman came in with a tray. She served me tea and “biscuits”, little shortbread cookies. I was so nervous; I couldn’t watch television so I stared out the window onto the street. The cars in the neighborhood said it all. There were Mercedes, Volvos, Land Rovers, Bentleys, all luxury models.
I started getting more and more anxious. Despite the fact that the room was large, I felt confined, like a caged animal. I decided that I just needed to step out back for some air. I was standing next to a beautiful oak door in the back of the room. I pulled it open and found myself in a narrow hall going down through the entire width of the building. There were several doors along the hall and one at the end. I ran through the hall and burst through the door at the end. Panicked, I was hyperventilating, my heart pounding.
I ran straight into what looked like a pantry area. A young man in tails and a woman in a servant’s uniform looked up at me, eyes wide, and mouth open, both shocked.
The man gently grabbed my upper arm to support me. “Miss McGee? You look very pale, you should sit down. Mary, please get Miss McGee some water.”
I saw the woman run through a swinging door. Glancing up, I saw the outline of his body, but his details were fuzzy. I could hear the man yell out, “Get Lord Guilford, quickly.” I was cold, but sweaty and everything looked and sounded like it was far away.
“Mags? Mags?”
I could hear Henry’s voice and feel my head cradled in his arms.
“Where’s that water?” He demanded with the voice of a Lord.
I looked up into his beautiful blue eyes. He looked so genuinely concerned for me, his eyebrows were knitted and he kept looking into my eyes for signs that I was better. He gave me a sweet smile, “Hallo? Mags, are you back with us? I’m going to take you upstairs and let you lie down for a while until you’re feeling better.”
He picked me up like a sack of potatoes and carried me to a small two-person elevator next to the stairway. I was hanging onto him, trying to get my eyes to focus on his face. He held me like I weighed nothing.
“You have an elevator?”
He glanced at me, cocked his head and blinked. “Oh! The lift! Yes, my grandfather had it installed in the fifties when he started to lose the use of his legs to diabetes.”
We exited and he took me into a bedroom with gorgeous eggshell and sage drapes, gold leaf and deep sage green wallpaper. It was a regal room, with a bathroom attached. Placing me gingerly on the bed, Henry sat next to me.
“Get some sleep. When you feel able to come downstairs, then join us.”
“Henry, I’m so sorry. Really.”
“For God’s sake, Mags, you don’t need to apologize. I’ve pushed you into the deep end. It was unfair of me. I’ve made a mess of it. You’ve done nothing wrong. When you’re feeling better, come downstairs.” He bent over and kissed my forehead. I watched him walk gracefully to the door, turn and wink, then leave. I wondered if they gave prospective earls deportment lessons. Both Henry and Campbell were more graceful on their feet than I could ever be. I closed my eyes. It didn’t take long for me to feel the comfort of sleep.
I woke up and looked around. It was dark except for a small lamp on the opposite side of the room which had been left on for my safety. I got up, went into the bathroom, and checked out my hair and makeup. It wasn’t too bad. After sprucing up a little and taking a deep breath, I began the ascent down the stairs.
As I approached the foyer, Robert was welcoming guests. I stopped in my tracks when I saw the beautiful woman enter. My heart squeezed together in pain. It was Gemma, dressed in a regal green satin dress with the beautiful pearl necklace I had found in Campbell’s bag hanging around her neck like a large neon sign that flaunted my failure. The pearls floated on her rather large breasts which made her tiny waist look tinier.
I was about to turn and run back upstairs when Campbell saw me. “Maggie?”
“Hello Campbell. How are you?” I walked down the stairs. “Gemma. I see you found your pearls.”
She smiled like the Cheshire Cat. “I understand I have you to thank for their return. And for the return of something more valuable.” She grabbed Campbell’s arm possessively. “Obviously, Campbell just needed to be reminded of how good we are together and being with you gave him that push.”
I was hurt. Campbell was looking sheepish, as if he was annoyed by what she had said. I looked at him and swallowed hard, trying to keep the emotions in check. I must have looked sad and uncomfortable, because he looked down at his feet and refused to meet my eyes.
“I’m glad that I could be helpful. It’s great to know that I could be the catalyst to bring you two back together. I hope that you will be happy.”
I didn’t really mean it. I hoped his penis would rot and fall off and those boobs of hers would deflate. And those pearls. I wanted the string to break, the pearls roll in all directions, out the door and down a drain. But, I didn’t want to look like I was the ungracious loser. I finished walking down the stairs, head held high, and shoulders back. Campbell finally looked over at me and gave me a forced smile. I turned and followed the voices coming from the parlor.
There were two dozen guests standing and sitting with drinks, waiting for dinner to be announced. Some were sitting on the velvet sofas, leather wingback chairs, or on the corners of the sturdy oak tables scattered through the room. The others were standing by the fire or next to the bar. Henry looked up and winked at me. He walked over, grabbed my elbow and kissed me on the cheek. “You look lovely and rested. Come meet some of my friends.” He started over to a crowd when he saw Campbell and Gemma.
“Campbell, mate. Where have you been? “
Gemma smiled smugly, “He was waiting for me to get ready. You know it takes time to look this beautiful.” It was meant to be a joke, but it seemed gauche. Gemma was beautiful and she knew it, she didn't need any extra time to make her look good. I watched her greet people with her head held high and her whitened teeth gleaming. The guests obviously knew Gemma and Campbell as a couple, because everyone commented on how ‘lovely’ it was to see the two of them back together.
Gemma clung to Campbell as I skulked behind them, following in their wake. I looked around for Henry who was across the room by the fireplace. I tried to duck around the popular couple, but found my path blocked by several well-wishers. Campbell saw my dilemma and stepped aside, smiling kindly down at me as I slipped through. I returned the smile, trying not to appear flirtatious as I did.
; Gemma was regaling the crowd with her travels, leaving Campbell the opportunity to say something just before I continued through the crowd over to Henry.
“You look beautiful tonight,” Campbell said.
I looked up into his eyes, “You do too…I mean you look handsome.”
“Thank you. Henry is very lucky. I hope the two of you make a go of it. He needs someone like you.”
I cocked my head. “Like me?” I wasn’t sure what that meant.
“Beautiful, kind, vivacious, intelligent and a little bit barmy.” He grinned.
“You make me sound too good to pass up.” I didn’t comment further, but he got my drift.
“Mags, it wasn’t you —”
I snickered. “It never is.” I turned away and crossed the room to Henry. He put an arm around my waist and pulled me to his side as he continued his conversation with a couple. The man was very tall — well over six feet, judging from the lack of wrinkles on his face, he was prematurely silver-haired, but somewhat plain to look at. The woman, who held a tumbler in her manicured fingers, was about Henry’s age, with a sharp nose and eyes too close together. They were standing next to the fireplace which had a large painting of a mid-evil hunt hanging over the carved oak mantel.
Henry held out his arm in introduction, “Viscount Greenwood and Lady Greenwood, may I present Maggie McGee. Mags, Greenie is my cousin, Kristen is his wife and related distantly to me on my mother’s side. I believe she’s my fifth or sixth cousin. It’s all so deliciously incestuous.”
I was dumb-founded; I didn’t know what to call them. I knew there was a protocol for the aristocracy, but I didn’t have a clue what it was. I nodded, “It’s a pleasure to meet you Sir, Mrs. Greenwood.”
Lady Greenwood smiled condescendingly at me while smoothing her size four St. John’s knit dress and snickered to herself. She looked like royalty, like fragile English Bone china. Viscount Greenwood gave up a sharp cough to indicate I had embarrassed him.
Henry put his lips up to my ear, “Darling, you can call him Viscount, Lord or Greenwood. You can call Kristen, Lady Greenwood or, if she gives you permission, by her first name. She won’t give you permission though, she’s a toffee nose. She loves her title.” He nuzzled his nose and then pulled away.
I was blushing ten shades of red at my faux pas. But Henry was sweet; he kissed me on my ear and whispered, “If it helps, I once shagged her in a cow pasture. She rolled in some manure and had a fit.”
The thought of this very proper woman, looking down her nose at me (although I was a couple of inches taller), rolling in cow shit, brought back my self-confidence. I turned to Henry. “Henry, I’m going to go get a drink.”
“Of course darling, would you like for me to get it for you?”
“No, stay with your cousin, I can get it.”
I went over and discovered that there was no ice which didn’t surprise me since the Brits were fairly stingy about ice anyway. I ducked through the door which I now knew led back to the butler’s pantry.
Discovering one of the cook’s helpers in the pantry, she practically fainted when she saw me in the service hall.
“Madam? Can I be of service?”
“Ice? Do you have more ice?” I handed her the ice bucket.
Robert bustled in upon hearing my voice. “It’s alright Charlotte; I’ll take care of it. Miss McGee, do you desire something?”
“Ice, Robert?”
He took the ice bucket from my hands as if it were a bomb, handing it to Charlotte. He motioned with his hand and she ran off. “Yes Ma’am, we’ll take care of it. Next time you need something, please just use the cord for the Butler’s bell and we’ll come to you.”
I had been given a good telling off by the manservant. I blushed once again. “Yes, of course.” Turing around, I started to go back through the servant’s door, but saw the look of horror on Robert’s face. He gave a slight motion towards another door; the one to the foyer which I assumed was the proper door for a guest to exit. I tiptoed my way to the door and walked through ending up next to the staircase when I heard women’s voices.
“So who’s the Yank with Henry?”
I tried to figure out whose voice it was, but I didn’t know.
“Oh she’s a piece of fluff that he and Campbell have been passing around until they get tired of her. Just a bit of amusement. I caught Campbell boffing her.” The voice was Gemma’s. “A few days later he was through with her and passed her along to Henry. I don’t know why Henry took up with her. Perhaps he just wanted a piece of apple pie.” There was a tittering amongst the women as they walked off.
I can’t describe the horrible nausea that washed through me. I froze up against the wall, unable to go forward or backwards. I was so out of my league. These were first rate bitches I was up against. I peeked around the staircase and saw that they had gone back into the room. I snuck across the foyer and disappeared into the library. Sitting in the dark on the arm of a sofa, I was stunned. The only light in the room was from the large fireplace. It was then that I saw the bottle of whiskey.
I grabbed a tumbler and poured myself several fingers full into the glass. I could tell it was expensive whiskey, because it went down very smoothly. I poured another one. Just as I was finishing it up, the door opened and the silhouette of a woman fell across the floor. I felt my whole body tense.
Her voice rang out accusingly, “There you are!”
I almost cried with relief. “Fiona! Is Henry looking for me?”
“Campbell sent me after you.”
My head snapped back, “Campbell?”
She started chuckling, as she walked over and sat in the chair next to the sofa. “Maggie, what are you doing in here?”
I almost started crying, “I just needed to get away.”
She shook her head. “Campbell’s worried that Gemma said something to you.”
“She didn’t say it to me.”
Fiona leaned forward, “You overheard Gemma saying something derogatory about you?”
“I’m apparently sloppy seconds. Just a piece of flotsam for Campbell to use and then pass on to Henry.” I took another drink and sat back with my head on the leather couch.
She snickered, “Gemma better keep her eye on Campbell. He was more worried about his piece of flotsam than about making sure she’s comfortable tonight. Gemma obviously doesn’t have his complete attention.”
“Fiona, I’m so out of my league here.”
“Nonsense. Maggie, they all eat, drink and pee like you. You can’t let them get to you. How much have you had to drink?”
I realized that I had just consumed what, for me, was a large quantity of alcohol in a short period of time. I whispered, “Two large glasses of whiskey in the last ten minutes.”
Fiona grabbed my glass. “Wonderful, just wonderful. You’re going to be two sheets to the wind in a few minutes. I need to sit you at the table between people who love you. I have to find Robert. You stay here.” She stood up and exited the room as fast as possible, leaving me to ponder my stupidity.
I was just about to nod off when the door flew open and in walked Fiona. “It’s arranged, we’ve settled you. Now come on, dinner is being served.”
I stood up and immediately fell back onto the couch giggling. My head was swirling and my mind was going a mile a minute. I knew I was in trouble.
Chapter 10
In the Soup
Fiona hadn’t said anything to Henry or Campbell; she had simply made the arrangements with Robert. Maggie had been originally seated next to Lord Wentworth, but now was being escorted to a seat between Fiona and Campbell. There were numerous protocols of seating, two of which were that you never sat next to the same sex unless there was an odd number of the gender and you were never seated next to the person who accompanied you to the event. The genders were even at the dinner table, but Fiona wasn’t going to risk putting Maggie in foreign territory, so a breach in protocol was arranged.
Campbell was standing next to
his chair talking with Charles, who was seated across from him. He glanced down and saw that the name card next to his was Maggie’s. His palms went cold and clammy. He didn’t understand why Henry would do this? You never put ex’s next to each other unless their relationship was well in the past. Campbell swallowed hard and looked down to the head of the table where Henry sat, trying to catch his eye to bring the problem to his attention. He saw Henry carrying on a conversation with Gemma and not paying any mind to Campbell’s furtive looks.
Fiona, holding up a somewhat clumsy Maggie, managed to make her way to the table. No one had been seated and wouldn’t sit until Henry offered the ladies their seats. Campbell turned to Fiona.
“What’s the meaning of this? Why did Henry sit Maggie next to me?”
“Because your bloody date managed to call her a whore and she hit the sauce to ease the blow. Now you and I get to babysit her.”
Campbell looked over at Maggie who was smiling broadly back at him. He turned away, embarrassed.
Henry raised a hand and motioned, “Ladies, please be seated.”
The men assisted the ladies into their seats, Campbell taking care to help Maggie sit down. Taking his seat, he looked down the table to see a furious Gemma, her eyes narrowed, jaw taught. She had just noticed the seating arrangements. Leaning forward to say something to Henry, she gave him an earful as Henry quickly looked down the table, then motioned Robert over. Robert said something in his ear and Henry nodded and said something back to Gemma who wasn’t happy, but apparently appeased.
Campbell leaned in and angrily whispered at Fiona, “You didn’t tell Henry why she’s next to me?”
“No time darling. Besides, I’d have to tell him what a twit your girlfriend is. For God’s sakes Campbell, how can you really consider getting back together with Gemma?”
Maggie stared back and forth between the two of them as they whispered around her. She looked into Campbell’s eyes which were fixed on Fiona. Putting her head between them, Maggie, her head wavering, wagged a finger at Campbell. “Yeah, why would any man take back a woman more interested in his title than his soul?”