by Audrey Storm
“Most guys your age are idiots.” It was as much the truth as her weight was. “If they can’t see how beautiful you are—”
“Okay, pep talk over,” she said with a laugh. A part of him that he barely controlled wanted to kiss her silly, to show her that a real man had so much to offer her.
A real man, who would worship her curves rather than deriding them. And maybe, just maybe, he was that man for her.
Jan looked at Keith, trying to figure him out. He was her dad’s best friend, sure, but there was something different today, something that she wanted to figure out. Something that made her look at him as a man—okay, one old enough to be her father, but a man. A very handsome man who had been compassionate to a scared little boy. That aroused every protective need in her, the nurturing she used at school making her a prime candidate to be attracted to a caregiver.
“Food will be here soon. You eat.”
He gave her a very level gaze, and she tried not to hide her wince. Her weight was a sore subject, both for her and as she related to people.
“Okay, I will,” she promised.
“Jan, you’re beautiful just as you are. Don’t worry about anything but relaxing a bit. That had to be terrifying for you.”
“It was,” she whispered, finally allowing her emotion to come to the fore. She sniffled a few times, and sucked in a breath. “Keith, there is a lot of trouble brewing. I don’t know how to stop it.”
“Tell me everything.”
She did, not sparing any details about her boss. There was no way they were coming back from this as an intact company, and she needed someone to lean on.
“Jesus Christ,” Keith whispered when she was done. “He’s going to get arrested, you know.”
She nodded. “And he’ll blame us. Me.”
“Why you?”
“I didn’t um…succumb? To his sexual advances, I mean. It caused me a lot of stress and I don’t think…” She trailed off, and she wasn’t quite sure how to say this.
“I wasn’t his favorite person after that. He took it very personally, and I have a sinking feeling he’s going to blame me for this.”
Keith sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “He can’t. He was clearly in the wrong.”
“Do you think he’ll care if he can take me down with him?”
Jan rubbed her arms, very cold all of a sudden despite the warm evening. “I’m really worried about it.”
“There’s nothing you can do right now,” Keith told her, “just hang in there and it will be better. He can’t do anything to you right now. You took the blood tests and everything and I know, as you do, there’s nothing to worry about there. Eat and spend some time with me.”
If only it were that easy.
They lapsed into a comfortable silence, and Keith set the table, pouring some soda for each of them. When there was a knock on the door, he went to open it, pointing toward the table. She spent an extra moment sitting and watching his ass before getting up. He really did have an incredible body.
There was something about him here, in his own environment, that made her want to forget about his friendship with her dad, to forget everything but this night and a nice guy, who might be old enough to be her father, but who most assuredly was not.
Keith was gorgeous at any age; he had to be closer to fifty than forty, but you would never have known it to look at him. His brown hair was thick and wavy, curling at the ends, and his green eyes were as dark and deep as she’d ever seen in a man. He was over six foot and still very slim, his bearing very strong.
And his smile…
He had an incredible smile, still youthful and gentle, but a bit naughty at times. She had a feeling if he let himself go, he could be a real handful.
But he was her dad’s best friend and there was no way they could go there, no way, no how. It wasn’t happening. That would be…not good. She didn’t know why, exactly, but Jan couldn’t take that step, not even in her imagination, even though her body seemed over stimulated.
It wasn’t as if she had a boyfriend, or even a buddy she could go to when she needed to alleviate sexual tension. She didn’t have that kind of relationship with any guy, which was unfortunate, but she wasn’t that kind of girl.
She was the friend, but not the lover, the sidekick type of character you’d find in every movie. The friend of the heroine rather than the heroine. The usually less attractive, less thin option to make the audience feel better about themselves.
Yeah, that was her.
Keith came back and started dishing the food out onto plates. Jan would have eaten out of the cardboard containers, but he was having none of that. As they ate, they relaxed together, and Jan felt the tension finally easing away. This would be a terrible time, but she could handle it just fine, as long as she had some friends along the way.
After dinner, she started to reach for her purse, and her phone inside, but he shook his head. “Couch. None of that.”
“What did you think I was doing?’ she asked, amused.
“I know what you were doing,” he shot back. “You were going for your phone, and you were going to see what everyone had to say and what the updates were. The little boy is fine, I’m sure of it. We do surgeries like that all the time. And as for your work crisis, you can’t do a damn thing about it, so get your ass on the couch and relax.”
That was kind of sexy the way he took charge, and she shivered. “Wine?”
“I better not.”
“Next time, then.”
Jan sat on the couch and Keith draped an arm around the top, fingertips trailing over her shoulder. She was sure he hadn’t gone any further than the “friend place” but it was nice to relax against the back of the couch and pretend for just a moment that she wasn’t alone.
“What is it you’re looking for, Jan?” he asked.
“What do you mean?”
“In your life, what are you looking for. This job is great, but you seem to be stuck in a bit of a rut right now. These guys don’t seem to see what a treasure they have in you, and that is a damn shame. You deserve so much more, Jan, and I’m afraid you’re going to get stuck in this place and not move on to bigger and better things.”
“I don’t know what to say to that.” It was true; he was right, she did have a lot of options, or might have, but now, with this situation, she might have hosed her career, or…this could be the stepping-stone she needed to get out.
If she didn’t get screwed.
“Say you have aspirations beyond that school. Say you want to do other things. Say you want to be known as more than a teacher. Say you want to nurture yourself as a woman, instead of just as you relate to those kids.”
“Yes.”
He was right, and seemed to know he’d hit pay dirt there. “I like the kids but at some point…”
“Yeah?”
“The job became my life.” She’d been in the running for a supervisory position, and she hadn’t been shocked that it hadn’t come through for her, but it had hurt. She went well over and beyond for the kids, buying everything from juice boxes and the latest educational toys, to physically sitting with sad—and injured—children. When the time to give commendations and raises came around, she was never chosen, and that hurt. That hurt a lot.
“You need to find a passion beside work and go for it.”
“Yeah. Like?”
“Dinner with a friend, or friends. Long walks on the beach. Maybe even a boyfriend.”
She snorted. It was a great idea but the actual execution wouldn’t happen. “Where should I find one of those? Online?”
He shuddered. “No, those are meat markets, you have no idea.”
Interesting, he seemed to know something about online dating. “What site?”
“Huh?” He looked kind of adorable when he was confused.
“What site did you use? I tried eHarmony, and the pairings were awful. One guy’s name was Dudley and he looked and acted just as you’d expect a Dudley to be. It was
…disturbing.”
“Hey, not everyone can be named a great name like Keith.”
“True.” She gave him a wink and a smile. “How about you?”
“Match. And her name was Brenda and she hoarded Beanie Babies. They all had names. She wanted me to come back and meet her friends. I declined.” He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “Then there were the ones who thought that because I’m a doctor that I can help them heal themselves. Always mental problems, always…”
“Yeah.” She could imagine it; he didn’t need to say anything more.
“It is really hard, dating in this environment. It’s not conducive to…”
“It’s a fake reality. Everyone sells themselves, rather than letting themselves be known as they truly are.”
“That’s it. You’re one smart lady.”
“Thanks.” She gave him a little smile, very pleased by his comment. “One smart single lady. Old maid, as my grandmother would have called me.”
“Better that no-good scoundrel, which was what she called me.”
“You? Why?”
“There may have been a little too much laundry soap in our principal’s car one prank day.”
Jan giggled and shook her head. “And because Daddy was the light of her life, there was no way she’d even broker any chance in the world that he was the ringleader.”
“You said it,” he said with a laugh. “You know how proud your parents are of you, don’t you?”
“Yeah, I have an inkling,” she told him, her mouth curving up into a smile. “They’re the best, Keith. They’ve done so much for me.”
“Do they know you’re unhappy?” he asked, startling her.
“Unhappy?” she asked slowly. “Does it really seem that way? I’m in a rut, sure, but I don’t know if I’m…”
“Jan, stop there. Bullshit. You’re lonely and you’re unhappy. Face it; we both know you are.”
She closed her eyes, shaking her head. It had been so long since anyone had really called her on her stuff, and it felt strange, not to mention a lot annoying, that it was happening now. And by Keith who was someone she was subtly trying to impress, though she wasn’t sure why.
“Okay, I’m in a rut. So what do I do about it?”
“Take some chances.”
“Mmhmm.” She couldn’t help the sarcasm she laced into that. “And how do I do that?”
“Live. Breathe. Fly without a net. Whatever it is, just do it and do it to the best of your abilities, and do it to emphasize your soul, rather than a paycheck or whatever else you’re thinking needs to be done. You have got to live, and by living, you’ll discover whatever purpose it is, whatever greater good that you need, whatever will feed your soul.” He gave her a level look. “I don’t need a psych degree to know that you’re eating to hide something deep inside you. That you’re coping by medicating with food.”
Okay, this was getting more than a little annoying. “And how would you know that?” she asked, glaring at him.
“I have a brain, a very active brain, and I know that you put yourself down with self deprecating humor and that you cope by being the best invisible force you can be, rather than the take charge woman you ought to be. I’ve seen it again and again. You’re not unique.”
“Well, good for you.” It was a childish comment but she felt a bit childish right now.
“Jan, it’s doing yourself a disservice to be that invisible force, when I know you can be so much more. How can you not see what you deserve as clearly as I do?”
She shrugged, unable to answer. All sorts of emotions she didn’t want to deal with were welling up inside her, begging to be released. Jan didn’t do emotional displays or anything like that, and this was disturbing. What was it about Keith that pulled these feelings out of her, and how could she ram them back in where they belonged?
Jan couldn’t understand this. She’d always known Keith, but never seen him as she was seeing him tonight. As an independent guy, not a friend or a dad. Now, but the hell was she going to do with all this emotion?
“I… Thank you. Nobody’s ever thought of me as an irresistible force before.” She really liked his faith in her. It was one of many things she liked about him. Even when she’d been struggling in high school, he assured her frequently that she could do it.
“I’m tell you what I see,” he said. Jan took that moment to stare into his eyes, trying to figure out his emotions. Was he interested?
And if he was interested, was Jan? Could she really go there? Jan bit her lip staring into Keith’s green eyes. Could she take the chance? Should she take the chance? What if he wasn’t interested? Would she screw up a really good thing?
“Stop thinking so hard about it,” he said with a little smile.
“Thinking about what?” Jan asked slowly. He couldn’t possibly have any idea what she been thinking, could he?
“You thinking about wanting to kiss me. And you wondering about consequences.” The last was delivered as a statement, not a question. He seemed to know her almost as well as she knew herself.
“I…” Jan snapped her mouth shut. What had she been going to say anyway? It was a strange tension swirling in the air, not just sexual, something she couldn’t identify. But the attraction was overwhelming her. She wanted more than her hands on this man. She wanted to fuck him.
“So, what will it be, Jan?
“What you mean?” She asked, aware that she was stalling for time.
“Well, the way I see it, there’s only one question. Your place right here?” Oh God. Oh God, were they really going to go there?
Keith regarded her, he could almost see the wheels turning in her head. It was clear that she wanted this. But, like him, she probably had some very realistic reservations. She was Daddy’s girl, and he was his best friend. This could be a disaster anyway he sliced it. But there was no turning back, the possibly hadn’t been since she’d walked into his ER mothering that little boy
“Jan, take a chance. You don’t always have to be conservative. In fact, I’d really like it if you weren’t conservative, at least in bed.”
Her face flamed, that pretty blush coloring her cheeks, and she shifted from foot to foot. What else did she need, engraved hard cock?
“Keith, I’m just not sure…”
“Not sure about what?”
“You. Me. Us?” Her voice rose in inflection, making the question almost comical. He might’ve laughed, but all spare concentration was going into trying to figure out how to make this work. How to ease her mind.
“I want you. Is it really so hard to conceive?” She closed the distance between them, taking her face in his hands, cupping her cheeks. “Tell me,” he whispered, “what you really have to lose? Jan, you spend your life waiting for something to come along. If you do, you might still be miserable in the long run. I don’t want you to be alone. I want you to be screaming in my bed. It’s your choice. But you know where I’m going.”
She sucked in a deep breath, and her eyes widened. But to her credit, she didn’t hyperventilate, or even continue to breathe hard. “Take a chance, Jan. Living life conservatively isn’t really living. I see life-and-death every day, I see regrets there, always what wasn’t done instead of what was done. Come with me, I won’t hurt you. I promise.”
According to Jan’s expression, her emotions kept changing from hope to need to want, and then to something else entirely. “Do you really want me? Not is my dad’s daughter, not as a friend, but as a lover?”
He supposed that was a reasonable question, one she needed to ask. Not that he particularly liked it, as he thought he’d displayed his needs pretty damn clearly. But, okay, he could go with it. As long as it got this beautiful woman in his bed.
“I want you. Jan. Not somebody who’s related to somebody I know. Not somebody I’ve known a long time, though those teen years were a little rough.” She laughed at that, a beautiful smile coming over her face. “Jan, I want you more and more every moment. As you, Jan. Not som
eone related to someone else. That has nothing to do with you. Or you and me. Why don’t we stop talking and you let me kiss you silly.” Her eyes flared wide at that but she relaxed and he stroked his hands over her cheekbones. “There you go, honey. Just relax. I promise it will be the best you’ve ever had.”
She sighed then, her eyes fluttering closed. He could tell the exact moment that she surrendered to her desire, and acquiesced to his. Keith cupped the back of her head, leaning in for gentle kiss, barely a brush of lips against hers. He needed her relaxed, compliant, he wanted her. He wanted her so fucking badly. “Pretend I’m the anti-match.com,” he whispered against her lips. “Pretend I’m somebody from Farmers Only if you need to, or any of those sites. Just make sure that you smile, Jan. I love your smile.”
She reached up gripping his shoulders pulling him down to kiss her again. Ah, good. She was in the game now. Keith crushed her to him, his mouth sealing on hers. This was not the time for slow gentle kisses. He took possession of her mouth, just as much as he took possession in his working life. She was his, he was in control. Keith only pulled back when she started making little mewling sounds, her chest began heaving. He pulled back, reeling, stepping just a few paces away. Jan put her hand to her mouth, almost covering her little smile.
“Oh my God. That was…”
“That was what?”
“That was… Please, bed. My panties are so wet right now I’m sloshing.”
“Well that’s not very sexy imagery,” he told her. “I think you need to work on your delivery, beautiful.”
She bumped hips with him, her eyes focusing in on his cock, which is hard throbbing and tenting his pants. “Somehow,” she said dragging the word out, “I think really do just fine. Very, very fine.”
He liked this transition in her, confident, a bit sassy, and very cute. There was something endearing about it, a self-satisfied woman who knew just how to please a man. Oh yeah. Oh hell yeah. Bedroom. Incoming.
He motioned her forward and led her to his bedroom, hoping that everything was neat and clean. He wasn’t messy exactly, but then again, he hadn’t been expecting someone to be having sex with him tonight. Keith poked his head in the room, glad to see he’d pulled up his blankets and didn’t have any scrubs or street clothes on the ground.