by Jessie Cooke
Finally with a loud grunt and another sound that was designed to drive me crazy, he exploded, inside of me. He rocked back and forth until he was emptied of every last drop and then he collapsed his body down onto the bed kind of beside and on top of me. Our limbs were tangled and shaking and I was consciously concentrating on taking in enough air to be able to breathe. I felt him bury his face into my hair and take a deep breath.
I lay there in his arms trying to make sense of why he had the kind of effect on me that he did. I’m not a prostitute, but I’m no saint. I’ve been with more than a few men and some of them were as good-looking as Ryan…okay, maybe not quite as good-looking, but close. I loved Michael enough to marry him…but no one had ever set my world on fire the way that Ryan did. Even Michael never made me feel even a fraction of what Ryan made me feel. I realized he was staring at me and without saying a word we gravitated towards each other and shared a long, deep, sweet kiss. We lay there for a long time, not talking, just holding each other and reveling in the aftershocks.
19
Ryan
“Are you hungry?” I asked Olivia after we’d lain there in her bed for an hour or so. She jumped, startled at the sound of my voice breaking the silence.
“I could eat,” she said, “What time is it?”
“About eight, I think. Can I ask you a question and you’ll promise not to get mad?”
She laughed. “No, I can’t promise. I don’t know what’s wrong with me lately but I go off at the drop of a pin. So, consider yourself warned.”
“I just wondered if you were going to take the job with Axel. If you don’t show up in the morning, he’ll fire me.”
She sat up and propped her head on her elbow. With a smile she said, “Wow, no pressure, huh?”
“None at all,” I said, trying to make my best puppy dog face.
“He would really fire you for me not showing up?”
“I’m pretty sure he would, yes. Axel is…”
“Weird? Strange?”
I laughed. “I was going to say different, but yes. The thing about him is though, if he likes you and you do right by him, you’ll never hurt for either a job or money.”
“Good to know. I’ll take the job. I need it and I’d hate for you to get fired because of me.”
I kissed the side of her face. “Good. Can I ask one more question?”
“Greedy, aren’t you?”
With a nervous laugh I said, “Do you think that you’re pregnant?” Her expression clearly said, “Oh shit!” as she remembered the pregnancy test.
With a heavy sigh she said, “I don’t know. I’ve felt strange lately…emotional and sick to my stomach a lot. I’ve also had a lot of changes in my life lately, so it could all just be nerves. I haven’t stopped my birth control…”
“So if you are pregnant, then there’s a chance it could be mine, right?”
She searched my face like she was trying to gauge how I would feel about that. After an uncomfortably long time she said, “Yes, there’s a chance. But don’t worry. I won’t ask you for anything.”
“Why are you so damned hard-headed? We don’t even know if there’s a baby or not yet and you’re already refusing to accept help.”
“I clearly remember you asking about a condom that night we were together. I told you not to worry about it. My screw up, my responsibility.”
“So what would you do with it?”
She raised an eyebrow and said, “I’d love it.”
“So you wouldn’t think about an abortion?”
“Absolutely not! I believe abortion is for extreme cases…like rape. But it’s not birth control. If I am pregnant, “it” is a child and no matter who the father is, I’m the child’s mother and I intend to act like it.”
“I wasn’t suggesting abortion, just so you know. If the baby is mine I would be devastated if you aborted it.”
“Really?”
“Really. If it’s mine Olivia, I want a hand in raising him.”
“Him?” she giggled.
“Okay, him or her. “Her” makes me nervous. I don’t know the first thing about girls. As a matter of fact, what I know about women could fill a teacup and I know less about girls than that.”
“Well, we’ll…” She abruptly stopped talking.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. We just shouldn’t be talking about all of this until we know for sure.”
“You want to take the test?”
“Not now. I need to take it in the morning. You don’t have to get food though, if you need to take off…”
I rolled my eyes at her and said, “I can’t really figure out if you’re always trying to get rid of me or if you really don’t think you’re worthy…either way, please stop. We’ve established that I’m somewhat of a stalker when it comes to you. If that baby turns out to be mine…well I have to warn you, I’m not going anywhere.”
She smiled. It was a mixture of sadness, nerves and relief, I think. “Go get me some food, I’m starving.”
I left with a smile on my face and went up to the pizza parlor at the corner. I was surprised at myself for how calm I felt about the baby. I never even considered having kids until recently and there I was, praying that it would turn out to be mine. I got the pizza and headed back to Olivia’s apartment. I was about to knock when I heard raised voices inside. One of them belonged to a man. I tried the door and it was unlocked so I let myself in. I couldn’t see them, but I could hear her and who I assumed was her husband, arguing in the kitchen.
“What is it that you want from me, Michael? You have Carrie. Go home to her and leave me alone, please.” Her voice was even and level so I wasn’t going to intervene. At least not yet. I sat the pizza down on the coffee table and continued to listen.
“I want our life back, Olivia. You screwed up as much as I did, right? I don’t see why we can’t forgive each other and move on.”
“I can’t forgive you for having an affair with Carrie. I just can’t do it, Michael. Besides, I just don’t feel the same about you as I used to…and if you really look inside of yourself, I bet you would have to admit that you don’t feel the same about me either.”
“Ten years, Olivia. We invested ten years in this relationship and what are our returns?”
She snorted. “Michael this wasn’t a business investment.”
“You know what I mean. I just feel like if we don’t at least try and make it work, it was all wasted time.”
“Well, I can’t help that you feel that way. We had some good times and I choose to remember those. I’d like us to walk away from this with as much dignity as possible though…so I don’t want to dwell on the bad stuff. At least we were lucky enough not to have children…” I could hear the catch in her voice. I wondered if he paid enough attention to hear it himself…and then I heard him snort. It was a haughty snort and I stood up off the couch and prepared myself to intervene in whatever he was about to start.
“It wasn’t luck,” he said. Oh shit!
“What do you mean, it wasn’t luck?”
“Just what I said. If it were up to you we would have five by now. Children just suck the life out of you. They would have ruined your body and our quiet time…our vacations. Most of the money I made would have gone to support them if you had your way…”
“So what are you saying? What did you do?”
“I had a vasectomy years ago, Olivia. You can thank me that we don’t have any kids.”
“You son of a bitch!” I waited until I heard the glass break and then I went in. I needn’t have worried about Olivia. She was the one with the broken bottle of Patron in her hand. I was really going to have to watch this one. She was looking at Michael with fire in her eyes. He looked like he was about to shit his pants. When I came in, he looked up at me and I said,
“If I were you, I’d get the hell out of here.” He didn’t have to be told twice. He scurried out with his tail between his legs like a coward. Once he was gone, I took ho
ld of Olivia’s wrist gently and got her to look at my face. She let go of the bottle and I took it and set it in the sink. I led her away from the broken glass and said, “Are you okay?”
She nodded and suddenly the tears sprang up. Damn this woman can cry! “I’m sorry. He makes me so mad. I’m not a violent person though, honest. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
I pulled her in for a hug and when it seemed she was getting herself under control I looked down at her face and said, “If you’re pregnant, it’s hormones. If you’re not, it’s stress. Either way, it’ll go back to normal soon enough. Look at the bright side; you’re not tied to that moron for the next eighteen years.”
“You heard that, huh?”
I pulled her back into my chest and said, “Yeah, I heard. What an ass.”
“Do I smell pizza?”
I laughed. “I’m really leaning towards pregnant,” I told her. She smiled and softly said,
“Me too.”
20
Olivia
ONE YEAR LATER
“Ha! Nine! She’s dilated to nine! I’m gonna win!” Axel pulled his head back out of my hospital room door and took off. I looked at my new husband and said,
“What is that insane man doing here?”
“Holly’s water broke a few hours ago.”
“Oh my God! Really? We’re having our babies at the same time? That’s so cool!”
“Yeah…well, it would be cooler if you could try and have him just a few minutes before Holly spits the demon spawn out.”
I laughed in spite of myself. “Ryan! Don’t talk about a sweet baby that way. With Holly as his mother, he’ll be okay. And, you do know I can’t control when he comes out, right?”
“Well, I know you can’t overall…but maybe if you pushed a little harder...?”
“What…? Oh Shit!”
“Contraction?” I nodded and he took my hand. “Okay baby, just remember to breathe…” I did my best to breathe through it. This shit hurts and for all Lamaze touts the breathing techniques…they don’t really work. Once the pain was gone I said,
“Please tell me you and Axel don’t have a bet on when the babies will be born?” He looked guilty and didn’t say anything. Sometimes he can be just like a little boy. Most of the time, I loved that. “So if I have little Nico first, what do we win?”
He looked like he didn’t want to tell me. He took a step back from the bed before he said, “His name…”
“You bet his…Oh fuck!” He grabbed my hand again and this time I squeezed his twice as hard. I’ll teach him to put my baby’s name in the pot. When that one passed I said, “What if I name him Nico anyways?”
“Axel said he’ll fire us if we cheat.”
The next contraction grabbed hold before I could tell him how ridiculous that was. Although I was going to have to take a maternity leave now too, Axel would play hell running that office without me now. Even Holly admitted that I’m a better assistant than she was. I’m sure it had to do with them being in love…but it was nice to hear. The contractions were coming closer and closer. My waters had already broken and the baby would be there soon. I might beat Ryan up for giving away his name, but I knew in my heart that despite his childish streak, he was going to make an amazing father. He was so excited about the baby, especially after we found out through his father’s lawyer that Harold had a vasectomy before he started checking off the part of his bucket list that involved women. The baby was Ryan’s and I couldn’t be happier about that.
My divorce from Michael was finalized two months ago. As soon as it was, Ryan and I flew to Las Vegas and got married. Holly and Axel stood up for us…that was one hell of a wild trip. I’m not sure that I even remember most of it…but I came home Mrs. Ryan Golden, so that’s all that really matters. I was being moved into the delivery room and Ryan was slipping on his paper gown and hat and shoes. Axel had already run by in his, cackling something about nobody being able to beat him. I looked at Ryan and he grinned behind his mask. Yeah, he was definitely getting his ass kicked later.
Secrets and Lies
Free Bonus Book
1
Masque—the newest, hottest bar in Dallas—was literally throbbing with life. Bella Ryan and her best friend Nicky Martin sat at the sleek, stainless steel bar, neon and laser lighting reflecting off the surfaces. The area that was the dance floor allowed little room to move, and while each girl was single, neither was feeling the need to rub her body up against perfect strangers at the moment.
“Mama always says, ‘A true lady lets a fella come to her,’” Bella told Nicky.
“Tonight, that’s the way we’ll play it,” she responded.
It had been a long day. Hell, it had been a long month, and the energy at Masque that night didn’t do much to add to either girl’s waning vigor, but rather it seemed to seep more of it away.
“Maybe we’re just getting old,” Nicky offered as she looked out at the dance floor with a sense of exhaustion.
“Maybe we’re just getting picky,” Bella responded. They both hadn’t had the best luck with guys lately—Nicky just coming off a long-term relationship in a matter of days—and each of them had sworn to the other that they would be more careful next time.
But Nicky saw Bella’s eyes light up at the entrance of a tall, broad-shouldered man who had approached the bartender just a few stools away from them.
“Hmmmm. I might like to know who he is,” Bella mumbled, though they both knew she was too shy to simply approach him.
“I can help you out there,” Nicky smiled. “He’s Reece Hamilton, a property developer. You’ve probably seen his signs around. And as of last week, he’s my boss.”
Bella turned her blue-green eyes on Nicky. They revealed the smallest hint of jealousy at her friend’s good fortune.
“You get to look at that all day? Geez! Why can’t I get a break?”
The two girls watched as Reece paid for a round of beers and expertly grabbed the neck of the bottles and headed over towards a round booth where three other equally dashing men sat, their eyes roving the bodies of the women who gyrated on the dance floor.
“Daaaaaammmmmn,” Bella drawled. “He’s sexy.”
“Don’t I know it?” Nicky answered dreamily.
“But he’s probably a jerk, right?” Bella said hopefully.
“Don’t really know. I’ve only met him once. All the girls at the office think he’s hot, though. You should hear them talking in the break room about all the things they’d like to do to him.” Nicky snickered. “These girls have nothing on a bunch of guys in the locker room.”
Reece Hamilton had just settled into the booth when he caught Nicky’s eye. He raised his beer bottle towards her and air-toasted her.
“He saw you,” Bella said.
“It’s about dang time,” Nicky answered. “I’ve been sending him mental telepathy since he walked in.”
“Invite him over here,” Bella instructed. She had not taken her eyes off Reece since he walked into her field of vision, and she knew she wanted to look at him up close and personal.
“What happened to letting the fellas come to the ladies?” Nicky smiled.
“Sometimes the fellas need a little help,” Bella answered quickly. “Mama does say men can be a little slow sometimes, and it is our duty as women to do what we can to help.”
Nicky laughed. “I think I’d like your mama,” she said to Bella.
“She’s one of a kind,” Bella remarked. “Now get that handsome piece of flesh over here. At least so we can see what color his eyes are. Ain’t no harm in window shopping.”
Nicky looked back at Reece, caught his attention, and beckoned to him with a jerk of her head and a crook of her finger. He said something to the trio seated with him, rose from the circular booth, hiked up his tight-fitting jeans, and strode over to where the girls sat.
“It’s Nicky, right?” he said with a smile.
“Yeah. Hi, Mr. Hamilton. This i
s my friend, Bella Ryan. Bella, Reece Hamilton.”
They shook hands, and Bella felt herself melt at the warmth and strength from Reece’s hand.
“Please, call me Reece.” He looked at Nicky. “That goes for you, too.” He winked.
His wavy black hair had been slicked back except for one rebellious curl that hung over his right eye. Though the bar wasn’t well-lighted, Bella was close enough to see his eyes were a honeyed brown that sparkled with power and intrigue, and she could only imagine the six-pack that lay in wait underneath the white Oxford shirt he had tucked into his jeans.