by Jessie Cooke
“What are you talking about? And how do you know so much about everything with Reece?”
“I’m talking about he gave Dave a job.”
“What?”
“He got him a job with a construction crew. Wants him to get his life on track and be a father to Hayley Jo. He’s doing all he can to help that little family get their lives straightened out in spite of all the wrong they have done him. Well, Hayley didn’t do him any wrong, but—you know what I mean.”
“He gave him a job?” Bella was in disbelief, and once again she was finding herself realizing just how right Christo was . . . again. Here she was judging and ready to write off Dave, but Reece was giving him a second chance—giving him a new life. Why couldn’t she just fall in love with a normal person?
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Christo shrugged. “Reece said it was only right that he help the man turn a new leaf and be a good father. He loves that little girl, Bella, as if she were his own, and he said if he can’t be the father, then the least he can do is make sure she has every opportunity for a good life, and that means good parents too. Besides,” Christo continued, “she’s your goddaughter, and Reece wants you to be the best godmother you can as well. So part of it he’s doing for you.”
Bella lowered her head into her hands. She found herself a little jealous of the fact that Christo seemed to know so much about what was happening in Reece’s life, but she admonished herself for the feeling. It was her own fault. She was the one who had decided to put the distance between them.
“You two seem to be spending a lot of time together,” she remarked.
“Who, Reece? Oh, well . . . there’s been a few ideas discussed.”
“Ideas?”
“Actually, a business proposition.”
“You and Reece are going into business together?” Bella felt her eyebrows raise.
“In a sense, yes.”
“What does that mean, ‘in a sense’?”
“It means it all depends on you.”
“Me? Why would it depend on me?”
“Because, Bella, I want us to start Divine Designs. Reece and I have been through the numbers. He truly believes that we have what it takes, you and I, to be a contender in the design world. Let’s do this, Bella. We’ve talked about it long enough. Now it’s time to really do it.”
“And I guess you’ve asked Reece to finance us,” Bella commented. “Here we go again. No matter what I do, he has his hands in it. I’ll never know what I’m really capable of because he is always interfering.”
“When are you going to get it through your thick skull that it isn’t interfering? He believes in you, Bella, and he wants to help you make your dreams come true. If he can do it for the people who lied and stole from him, then he can certainly do it for the person he loves more than anything or anyone in the world.”
Her jaw had been set, but it was beginning to relax as she listened to Christo.
“Those are his words, by the way,” he continued. “He loves you, Bella. He wants to do whatever it takes to make you happy. That’s all he’s ever wanted, and he’s convinced that you are happiest when you’re with him.”
Bella’s shoulders lowered as she released her breath. Christo was right. Reece was right. She wasn’t completely happy now; content, maybe, but she was happiest with him. For days she’d felt that something had been missing, kind of like feeling like you’ve forgotten something that you know is important, but you can’t quite put your finger on it. Sitting here listening to Christo, she knew that the ‘something’ missing was Reece.
“So, I’m just supposed to forget all the stupid stuff that he’s done and take him back?” Bella asked, still trying to maintain the wall she’d put up even though she felt it crumbling beside and beneath her.
“Yep,” Christo said. “God knows we’ve all done stupid things and needed someone to forgive us. Turnabout is good play,” he said. “It’s bad karma not to practice the golden rule.”
“I don’t know how many religions and philosophies you’ve got going in that one statement,” Bella laughed, “but I get what you’re saying. I just don’t know how easy it’s going to be.”
“Nothing worth doing is ever easy,” Christo commented. “And let’s not forget that there’s Luke, too.”
“What about Luke?”
“You need to forgive him, too.”
Bella shook her head. “That’s different. He used me.” She stretched her legs out in front of her and lay back on the blanket. The sun had set and an expanse of stars greeted them.
“He may have used you at first—we’ve all done self-serving things we regret, but the reality is he fell in love. Circumstances didn’t matter once that happened. He started off with other intentions but once again love proved more powerful. See? That’s where Reece failed: you’re so easy to love.”
“How do I forgive Luke?”
“What for?” Christo asks. “For lying or falling in love?
“For lying.”
“By accepting that he did fall in love.” He made it sound so simple. “The truth of the matter is this: you’ve said your good-bye to Luke. It doesn’t really do anything for your relationship whether you forgive him or not. He doesn’t even know you’re harboring these feelings towards him. The person it does help, Bella, is you. Carrying around that resentment and bitterness towards him? It’s wasted energy and poison to yourself. For your own sake and your own goodness, you should just let it go.”
Bella propped herself up on one elbow and faced the direction Christo’s voice was coming from. She could make out his outline against the dark navy sky.
“How’d you get so wise?” she asked.
“All that I’m saying to you, someone said to me once,” he said. “It’s all experience talking. I guess I’m just a little like Reece in this way: I want you to be happy, Bella. You’re my best friend, and I want to see your dreams come true, too. You’re the best person I know. I don’t want you to lose that goodness because of your decision to become jaded and bitter. You’re so much better than that.”
Bella smiled in the darkness, knowing that Christo couldn’t see it, but this smile was for herself, from deep within. Suddenly, Nicky’s face appeared in front of her, and she had a revelation: if Reece could forgive Nicky, then Bella could forgive Reece . . . and Luke to boot.
“I love him,” Bella heard herself say. “And I don’t want to be bitter.”
“So don’t,” Christo whispered. “Some people forgive and some don’t. Those who do find peace and harmony which opens their hearts to love. Those who don’t let anger and resentment eat away at their very soul. You get to choose. I chose to forgive Nicky, too, and let me tell you, I can’t believe the weight that’s gone from my shoulders.”
Bella could feel the weight of her resentment pressing down on her—not just her shoulders but her chest, too. She couldn’t live like that. Ever since she’d gotten home, she’d felt it—except for the brief period with Destiny, when everything faded to the background but the horse and the wind. She knew she could feel that free again, by letting go—letting it all fade to the past as she rode towards her future.
She looked up into the stars and fixed her gaze on one that seemed to shine a bit brighter than the others. She closed her eyes and said a silent prayer to the universe. “Take it away,” she thought. And when she opened her eyes, she breathed out all the anger, all the hurt, and all the animosity into the darkness.
And the star shone brighter all of a sudden, but this time she felt it from inside.
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Bella’s grandmother placed a piece of her famous apple cake in front of each of them before excusing herself to the beauty shop.
“It’s my bi-weekly appointment,” she explained to Christo. “Gotta get my hair set. It takes work to look this good.”
“Don’t I know it!” Christo said. “Just look at these roots!” He bowed his head so that everyone could see his dark haired roots creeping in on his blonde bleach job
. “I’m wanting this blonde to just die already—get it. Die? Dye? But it just looks so horrific right now. I’m ready to go back to my natural color, but you know what they say about being blonde?”
“What?” Bella’s grandmother was captivated by Christo’s magnetic personality. She had told Bella she just loves his gusto for life. “That they have more fun?”
Christo waved his hand. “Nah, that’s not even close to true, as Bella can tell you.” He winked at Bella conspiratorially. “No, they say it’s great to be a blonde. Since people have such low expectations of blondes, it’s very easy to surprise people. And I, for one, love to surprise people.”
Bella, her grandparents, and Christo shared an easy laugh as three of them also dug into Grandma’s apple cake.
“Well, you should just come with me, Christo,” Bella’s grandmother proposed. “There’s usually someone in the beauty shop that doesn’t have anything to do when I’m there. Tuesdays are slow days. You’ll get all the town gossip, too.”
Christo looked at Bella, and Bella could sense his cry for help. There was no way that he was going to darken the doorway of some two-bit beauty shop. Oh, no! Christo Drake had his own stylist at an Aveda salon in downtown Dallas. But how to avoid breaking Grandma’s heart?
“Grandma,” Bella stepped in. “I’m going to take Christo out on Destiny today. He can get his hair done anytime when he gets back to Dallas, but he can’t go horseback riding and see these beautiful views, that’s for certain.”
“Thank you so much for the offer,” Christo said. “I’m sure it would be an experience I wouldn’t forget.”
“Oh, it’s nothing, and it was silly of me not to think before I said anything. I’m sure someone as important as you has his own stylist. Shoot, they probably come to your house and do all of that for you.”
Christo laughed lightly. “Well, not exactly, but I wouldn’t mind that, for certain.” He took another bite of her apple cake. “I have to say, this cake is absolutely divine. I may have to steal another piece.”
“You hear that, Jack? You may have some competition.” Bella’s grandmother reached out for Christo’s cheek and patted it so that it made a smacking sound. “You eat all you want of it, and if that old man starts grumbling, you just remind him who’s company and who’s not.”
Christo popped the last bite of cake into his mouth and headed for another piece. “I’m going to get it while you’re still here. That way you can defend me,” he said.
“Don’t you worry,” Jack grumbled. “Soon’s she’s gone, your ass is grass.”
“I don’t even know what that means,” Christo said as he placed a second piece of cake on his plate.
“It means I’m gonna bury you in the back forty,” Jack grumbled.
“Gotta catch me first,” Christo said. “And Bella can tell you—I’m a pretty spry little guy.”
Bella’s grandmother laughed and waved her hand. “Just make sure to clean up after you make the mess,” she called as she headed out the door. Bella, too, helped herself to another piece of cake.
“Between the two of you, I’m not going to get any extra apple cake,” her grandfather bemoaned.
“Oh, Grandpa. I know you—you’d give me your last bite if I asked it of you.”
He smiled over at his granddaughter. “That I would, Bella Boo.”
“Wouldn’t we all?” Christo chimed in. He turned to Bella’s grandfather. “I know you are so proud of your granddaughter, sir.”
“I sure am,” Jack agreed.
“And what would you say if I told you that Bella and I might be starting our own business?”
“Is that a fact?” Bella’s grandfather turned towards her. “You didn’t tell me.”
“That’s because I didn’t know until just two nights ago.” Bella shrugged. “I don’t know if I can really do it,” she said. “It’s pretty scary, starting your own company.”
Jack reached beside him and patted Bella’s knee under the bar where they sat. “If anyone can do it, you can. You’re the smartest of the whole lot, Bella. I wasn’t that happy when you went out to the big city at first, but I can see how it has agreed with you. You’ve become quite a force to be reckoned with, and you’re a damn good designer and artist, if you want my opinion. Your mom showed me what you two are gonna do with your old room, and it’s about time. Can’t go on living in the past.”
Bella’s bedroom had remained exactly the same as when she had left it for college. Her mother had never changed it, and while there was something sentimental and sweet about leaving it all the same, Bella always felt trapped in a time warp when she came home to it. Her mother had finally conceded and agreed to redo it on one condition: Bella do the design.
The plan was to turn it into a craft room for her mother, and Bella and Christo had spent the day designing cabinets and shelves for all of her mother’s sewing and scrapbooking. It was a simple project, especially considering the scale and grandness of the resort they’d done.
“You’re very talented,” her grandfather said again.
“That’s what I keep telling her,” Christo said. “She doesn’t believe in herself enough.”
“Why not?” Jack asked her, his gaze fixed upon her.
Bella shrugged. “I’m not sure. I just don’t think I measure up. In my field, there are tons of really talented, award-winning designers. I don’t have the credentials they do. I can’t hold a candle to them.”
“Bullshit.” Jack spat out the word. “Credentials don’t mean crap. What you do have is heart, and that’s what is missing in too many people nowadays.”
“Listen to your grandfather,” Christo said.
“Now why is it you can’t find yourself a sensible man like Christo, here?” Jack asked Bella.
“Probably because I’m gay,” Christo answered for her. “Though I love Bella, it’s not the marrying kind of love. That I reserve for men, namely, my husband Simon.”
“You’re married?” Jack asked in awe. “To a fella?”
“Yes . . . though it isn’t recognized legally yet. But some day.”
“Well, I’ll be damned. I never thought I’d see the day.”
“Grandpa . . .” Bella warned.
“Don’t worry, Bella. I’m just thinking aloud. I’ll have to admit: I never thought I’d see the day that I could carry on a conversation with a fruitcake and forget he was a fruitcake. No offense.”
Christo laughed. “I’ve been called a lot in my time, sir, and fruitcake—at least to my way of thinking—is about the least offensive I can remember. No offense taken. I’m just glad we could have this time.”
“Me too,” Bella thought as she looked at her grandfather and Christo with a smile, a two unlikely pair sharing a piece of her grandmother’s cake and this epiphany.
The sound of a helicopter far off caught her ear, and Bella realized just how quiet her past weeks had been. Suddenly, the sound of the helicopter seemed nearer, not fading like they all expected it to be. Bella rushed to the kitchen window to look out. The cows were mooing and looking up towards the nuisance in the sky, and finally, as the helicopter came lower, they abandoned their own lowing and moved out of the way.
“What in the hell?” Jack Ryan breathed from behind Bella.
“That is the second reason Bella can’t find herself a ‘sensible man’ like me,” Christo answered. “Jack, you’re about to meet your future grandson-in-law.”
“Who?”
“It’s Reece,” Bella said just before she took off out the door.
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“Shit,” Reece mumbled as he stepped his Italian loafer into a soft, dark brown pile. He was approaching the fence where Bella was leaning, the helicopter already taking off behind him. He found a small patch of thick grass and wiped his foot in it.
“That’s exactly right,” Bella said to him from a few feet away. “Not exactly the kind of shit you’re usually stepping in, but shit all the same.”
He smiled. “Nice to know that razo
r wit of yours hasn’t atrophied in my absence.” He took the overnight bag off his shoulder and set it down, careful that no brown piles were underneath it.
Bella hopped over the fence and found herself in Reece’s arms before she had time to think it all through.
“Well, this might be easier than I thought,” Reece mumbled into her hair.
“Just shut up and kiss me,” Bella demanded, to which he promptly lowered his lips onto hers and felt the pressure of her mouth hard on his.
“I’m sorry, Bella. I’m sorry for everything, and if you give me a chance, I’ll spend a lifetime making it up to you.”
Bella ran her fingers through the dark hair at the base of his neck. It seemed like it had been so long since she had touched him. Her eyes couldn’t drink in the sight of him fast enough, and her lips were already longing to taste him again, to feel him on her mouth again. She pulled his head down to hers and kissed him another time, and she realized that this—this felt like home to her.
“I’m the one that should apologize,” she said. “I shouldn’t have fled without giving you a chance to say all you needed to say. I should have heard you out. And I shouldn’t have doubted you or your motivations. I love you, Reece, and no matter how hard I’ve tried not to, it just hasn’t worked. You’re too easy to love,” she smiled. “And I’m going to start doing just that for the rest of my life.”
“So this is the cause of all the problem?” Bella heard her grandfather call out.
Bella and Reece turned towards Jack Ryan as he approached.
“I’m the cause of the problem,” Bella claimed. “This is Reece, Grandpa.”
“Well, I’ll be damned. Seems I’ve already met you, so to speak,” Jack greeted. “Seems to me I’ve met more of you than you have of me.”
Reece felt his face redden. “Bella?”
“Oh, urm, yeah. About that portrait.”
“I’m guessing the entire family has seen it?”