Shane and Riley emerged from the den just as Cynthia reached the kitchen door. Shane called to her, his voice sounding upbeat, rather than angry.
“Cynthia, I’m taking Riley and Isabelle to dinner tomorrow night, just a quiet little family get-together that’s long overdue. I’d like for you and Bobby to join us.”
A family get-together—the words were not lost on her. Neither was the knowing expression on Shane’s face. An uncomfortable level of anxiety tried to take hold, leaving her insides quivering with trepidation over what he was really saying. She forced down her rising apprehension, determined to present a strong outer persona. “I, uh, thank you for the invitation, but I’m afraid I won’t be able to.”
“I hope you can rearrange your schedule and join us, Cynthia,” Riley said. He glanced at his watch, then turned his attention to Shane. “I need to get going.”
Cynthia took advantage of the change in direction of the conversation and went into the kitchen. She poured herself a glass of iced tea, intending to take it back to her bedroom. She breathed a sigh of relief when she peered around the corner into the foyer and didn’t see Shane anywhere. A little of the anxiety drained from her body. She hurried toward the staircase, but didn’t get very far.
Shane stepped in front of her, blocking the way. His face wore a hard look of determination, and she knew the reprieve had come to an end. Her resurrected fears joined forces with her full-blown panic. Her heart pounded in her chest and her blood ran cold. She couldn’t quite catch her breath as she fought for some semblance of control over her rapidly escalating dread.
“We have to talk about—” The words stuck in his throat when he saw the terror that filled her eyes. He’d seen it there before, but now he knew why it was there. Now he knew the truth about Bobby.
She looked away, unable to maintain any type of eye contact with him. She injected as much finality into her words as possible. “We have nothing to discuss.” Her eyes misted over. She fought to maintain control of her skyrocketing fears. “You made your true feelings perfectly clear when we were in graduate school. You may have finally explained your reasons for walking out, but that doesn’t change anything. You were definite about not having anyplace in your life for me.”
She blinked away the tears that brimmed in her eyes and started to trickle down her cheeks. “I took your words to heart and have since made a life for myself. So you see, we have nothing to discuss.” She could not stand another moment of the churning sickness that threatened to overtake her resolve. She turned away from him and ran up the stairs to her room.
Her entire body shook violently as she sat on the edge of the bed. She made a futile attempt to untie the knots twisting in her stomach. She was sinking deeper and deeper into a hole she’d never be able to dig her way out of. She loved Shane, but that didn’t change anything. A sob caught in her throat. Nothing mattered to her as much as her son. She’d do anything to protect him.
She heard the door open, then Shane’s footsteps as he crossed the room. A cold terror cut through her. The walls closed in around her. This was it. She tried to gulp in enough air to settle the fear making its way up her spine. She opened her eyes and focused on his face. One look was all it took. Any hope that he didn’t know the truth vanished.
“We have things to talk about—and the number-one item on the list is Bobby and his future.” He broke eye contact with her. The fear that showed through her tears grabbed his heart. He clenched his jaw in renewed determination. There could be no turning back.
“About Bobby... He’s my son, isn’t he?”
She squeezed her eyes shut as the almost unbearable pain ripped through her body. He sounded so unemotional, so distant.
“Answer me, Cynthia. He’s my son, isn’t he?”
She managed a barely audible whisper. “Yes.”
He knew what the answer would be, but it didn’t prevent the hard lump that caught in his throat when he heard her say it. He couldn’t stop the words that spilled out of him, half confusion and half anger. “Why, Cynthia? Why didn’t you tell me you were pregnant? Why didn’t you let me know I had a son?” And the most damaging of all. “Even after we made love last night, you still kept it from me.” He shook his head, unable to comprehend how she could have done such a horrible thing. “Why?”
Years of pain and failed attempts to dismiss Shane from her life came out in an emotional rush. “He’s my son. My life. You told me there was no room in your life for me. Since you don’t have room for me, you couldn’t possibly have any room for a child. I won’t let you reject him the way you did me. I won’t allow you to hurt Bobby the way you hurt me.”
Tears streamed down her cheeks. “He’s just a little boy, Shane. He’s an innocent little boy who has no involvement in our past.” Sobs wrenched her body now, as she blurted out her worst fear. “Please don’t tear his world apart by trying to take him from me.”
Shane recoiled as if he’d been struck. Total bewilderment filled his words. “Take him away from you?”
“Please don’t bring a custody suit.” The very real fears that had been living inside her from the moment she realized she was in his house finally pushed her to the edge of hysteria. Her features contorted in anguish. She hurled her words at him. “If you do anything to hurt him, I swear I’ll never forgive you as long as I live.”
The depth of her emotional outburst shocked him, but not nearly as much as the meaning of her words and the pain surrounding them. Shane knew he had hurt her, but had no idea how much until now. His intention to straighten out his own life and identity before he could subject anyone else to the ambiguity of his world had cost him dearly. He had paid with the first five years of his son’s life—Bobby’s first step, his first word, watching him grow to a toddler and then to this bright little boy filled with curiosity and adventure. It had also cost him the only woman he had ever loved. Was it too late to repair the damage? He didn’t know.
He studied the anxiety-filled face before him, the face of a woman who had threatened and pleaded with him all in one breath. And she now seemed to be holding that breath, waiting for him to say or do something. He didn’t know what to say. He saw her emotional need, but the anger and resentment still churned inside him. He expelled a long breath, releasing some of his anger at the same time. “Maybe this would be better discussed in the morning after a good night’s sleep.”
She pulled herself together and shoved aside her trepidation. She wasn’t sure where the pocket of courage had come from, but she gratefully seized it. She had to tell him the rest, not leave any loose ends. “I plan to look for a house for Bobby and me first thing in the morning. I need to get Bobby settled in day care for the summer, then I’ll be enrolling him in first grade in the fall. As soon as I find us a house, I’ll be looking for a job.”
She paused to gather her thoughts, wanting to make sure she clearly expressed herself so there could be no doubt about what she meant. “Regardless of what type of understanding you and I reach, it will not alter my need to get Bobby settled into a stable and permanent environment as quickly as possible.”
He stared at her a moment longer, giving away nothing that was going through his mind. “We’ll talk in the morning.” He left the room, closing the door behind him.
The initial confrontation was over. The most difficult part had been handled. Shane knew that he had a son and that she and Bobby would be moving out of his house as soon as possible. Unfortunately Cynthia’s sense of relief did not extend to the ache in her heart. The important thing now was to establish what kind of relationship Shane wanted with his son—and how to tell Bobby that Shane was his father.
The problem was far from resolved, but at least everything was finally in the open. There were no more secrets, no more fears of what might come out—only the fear of what would happen now. She rose from the edge of the bed. Her heavy sigh of despair told her nothing good could possibly come out of what had happened. She choked back a sob as she turned toward the bat
hroom, her sorrow almost more than she could bear. She hadn’t taken more than two steps when the bedroom door flew open and Shane burst in. A sick lump lodged in her throat.
The determination on his face said it was the take-charge Shane Fortune who’d just entered the room. The same tenacity filled his voice. “This won’t wait until morning. We have serious matters to work out, and we need to do it now. Bobby is my son, and I won’t be left out of any more decisions concerning his future. We’ll start with day care and his school.”
It was the worst possible move he could have made. She matched his aggressive attitude with one of her own. Juggling single parenthood with a demanding full-time career had forced her to become her own person very quickly. The last thing she needed was Shane Fortune making her decisions for her, especially where her son was concerned. There was no longer any need for caution in order to preserve secrecy. She came out fighting like a mother bear protecting her cub.
She cut off anything further he might have intended to say and made no attempt to hide her displeasure. “I’ve managed just fine from the day you kicked me out of your life. Bobby is a happy child. He’s well cared for and knows he’s loved. I can handle all our needs without any help from you.” She glared at him, aggressively leaning forward to show him that she refused to be intimidated.
If he thought he could easily get custody of Bobby, she would show him just how big a fight he’d have on his hands. She felt as if she was fighting for her own life, as well as her son’s. “I’m willing to work with you to set up a convenient visitation schedule, but I will not be dictated to about how my son is to be raised!”
His level of anger, along with his volume, rose to match hers. “Do I need to remind you that Bobby is my son, too? Something that you neglected to mention to me until I forced it out of you?”
“I will not have my son’s life upset any more than it already has been simply because you have decreed that it should be so. You may have the Fortune name, influence and money, but I will not allow you to run over me as if I were nothing more than a nuisance in the way of your plans.”
They glared at each other, the air between them charged with anger and passion.
“What’s wrong, Mommy? Why are you and Shane mad?”
“Bobby...” The sound of her son’s voice sent an adrenaline surge through Cynthia, followed closely by a raw edge of panic. She had been so absorbed in her confrontation with Shane that she hadn’t heard Bobby enter the room. How much had he heard? “Uh, I’m sorry, honey. We didn’t mean to wake you. We...” She glanced uneasily at Shane, then back at her son. She knelt next to him, brushed his tousled hair away from his face and gave him a reassuring smile. “We were discussing some business and I guess we got a little loud.”
She took Bobby’s hand and started for the door. “Come on. I’ll tuck you in bed again.”
Shane watched as Cynthia led Bobby back to his bedroom. He’d been totally unnerved by their heated confrontation. He had never seen that side of Cynthia before, a woman who dug in and fought for what she wanted. It was a trait he knew well, for it was the same way he tackled things. He also saw the unconditional love Cynthia had for her son, and the trust in Bobby’s eyes when he believed what his mother had told him.
The situation was precarious at best. Her emotion-laden words of earlier flooded through his mind. He’s just a little boy, Shane. An innocent little boy who has no involvement in our past. Please don’t tear his world apart. She was right. He couldn’t allow Bobby to be the center of controversy between himself and Cynthia—a controversy that should never have existed. They should have been working as a team, rather than at odds with each other.
He loved her and wanted them to be a real family— Cynthia, himself and their son. It was the missing piece to his life, one he’d thought would not fit, but now realized had fit perfectly all along. He frowned as dark clouds began to gather overhead again. Cynthia had already made it clear that she was not in any mood to discuss a compromise. Perhaps it would be better left until morning, after all, when cooler heads prevailed.
When Cynthia returned to her room, it was obvious that she was still upset about their argument waking Bobby and in no mood to continue with it. He tried to ease the tension by projecting an upbeat manner.
“You’ve done a great job of raising Bobby. He’s terrific.”
Caution surrounded her words as she replied, “Thank you.”
“Well—” he glanced nervously at the door “—perhaps a good night’s sleep is what we both need.” He started to leave the room, then paused and turned back toward her. “I’m looking forward to dinner tomorrow night with Riley, Isabelle, you and Bobby.” He looked hopefully at her then turned toward the door again. “Good night, Cynthia.”
She didn’t respond. She just stood silently and watched as he left her room. She didn’t know what to think. Did he intend to take Bobby away from her with a legal battle? The man she’d fallen in love with all those years ago wouldn’t do that. The man she’d accompanied to the reservation certainly wouldn’t do that. And the man she’d made love with last night wouldn’t do that. But the man who’d just left her bedroom? She didn’t know what to expect from him. She wasn’t even sure who he was.
“Now, be very quiet. We don’t want to wake Shane. He needs his rest,” Cynthia whispered as she took Bobby’s hand and started down the stairs. They left quickly through the front door and went to her car. She’d been a nervous wreck from the moment she’d opened her eyes that morning. She had to get out of the house before Shane could corner her. There was no way she could handle a repeat of the previous night’s heated confrontation.
Bobby looked up at her, clearly confused. “Where are we going?”
“First we’re going to have breakfast.” She buckled his seat belt, making sure it was secure before she slid behind the steering wheel. “Then we’re going to spend the entire day together. We’re going to look at houses this morning. We’ll find one with a nice swimming pool. Then we’ll have lunch—maybe a picnic in the park. And this afternoon we can go to a movie. How does that sound?”
She drove down the street. Some of her tension drained away when they turned the corner and were out of sight of Shane’s house. She was glad they’d been able to leave without encountering him. She glanced at Bobby and tried to shove away her guilty feelings about taking him house-hunting with her, something she knew wasn’t what a little boy considered a fun thing. She would make it up to him with the movie.
The day went by smoothly—except for the anxiety over what would happen when they returned to Shane’s house that evening. They looked at several rental houses, two of which she really liked. They had their picnic in the park and went to a movie. After the movie they looked at two more houses. Then they had dinner. It was going on six o’clock when they returned to Shane’s house.
As soon as they stepped through the front door, Shane jumped up from the chair where he’d obviously been waiting. The expression on his face told her he was both impatient and angry. She stiffened her resolve. It would do him no good.
His words demanded more than asked. “Where have you been all day? You went sneaking out of here this morning without a word about your plans.”
Her voice was soft as she spoke to Bobby. “Why don’t you go upstairs and put on your swimsuit? We’ll go into the pool in a little bit. Okay?”
His face lit up at the prospect. “Okay.” He ran up the stairs.
She watched until he was out of sight, then turned a hard glare on Shane. “I hardly think walking out the front door is sneaking. Besides, I wasn’t aware that I needed to clear my plans with you.” She presented a cool composed exterior that totally belied the nervous tremors charging in all directions inside her. “Bobby and I went house-hunting this morning, then decided to make a day of it by going to a movie this afternoon.”
“House-hunting?” His expression almost made it seem as if he didn’t understand the meaning of her words.
“I
fail to understand your surprise, especially since I informed you of my intentions last night.”
Shane sidestepped her well-aimed comments. “Riley canceled for dinner tonight. He’s not feeling well. We’re supposed to meet Isabelle at the restaurant in less than half an hour.”
“Then you’d better hurry.”
“Me?” The surprise spread across his face. “What about you? You and Bobby are supposed to have dinner with us.”
“Bobby and I have already had our dinner.” It was a definitive statement and did not reveal any hint of her inner thoughts or feelings. She had to glance away when she saw the very real disappointment that filled his eyes.
“I see.” His words were as devoid of emotion as hers.
“Mommy?” Bobby called from the top of the staircase. His voice contained a sense of urgency. He hurried downstairs, his gaze darting between Cynthia and Shane. “Are you and Shane going to fight again?”
His words cut through the thick cloud of troubled emotions. She saw the distress covering his little face and it tore at her heart. She knelt down and enveloped him in a loving hug. Her words were soft and comforting. “No, honey, we aren’t going to fight again.” She glanced up at Shane and saw the embarrassment on his face that told her he, too, had no interest in pursuing the conversation in front of Bobby.
“I, uh...I have to get going.” Shane took his car keys from his pocket, turned and left through the kitchen.
Fifteen minutes later he arrived at The Camel Corral to find Isabelle waiting for him. He greeted his sister with a smile and a kiss on the cheek, making sure he projected a manner that said nothing was amiss. “Have you been waiting long?”
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