Becky rolled toward the edge of the mattress and in a mere moment he stopped her from falling off the bed. It didn’t take much to settle her back to the middle. The other human men mentioned she had nightmares. With his hand hovering over her midriff he took a breath. Lowering his hand, his fingers caressed the flat of her belly. She was dreaming. Huck knew if they were mated, he could go to her in her dreams. What he could do was calm her.
Droplets of moisture dripped from his hand to roll down his finger. A small bead of sweat dotted her skin then slipped into her. She moaned and visibly relaxed. A red angry mark he hadn’t noticed on her arm caught his attention. More secretions seeped into her dulling the redness. If they were mated he could fix her, not just ease her suffering. Huck rose and went to the next room where he replicated a warm blanket. When he returned, he draped the blanket over her, tucking it around to keep her from rolling. When he left the room, he went to stand at the console. His thoughts were conflicted.
I can’t mate her. I can’t have a home. There is too much of my father in me and Cobra will see.
His shield didn’t agree. Huck hadn’t lied. He liked to kill; he was a warrior and killing was part of what every Tonan was, good or bad. The battle continued in his thoughts. His shield slammed over him and Huck was startled. A groan ripped from his throat. He knew the stubborn set of his shield. The shield claimed the female. Huck sensed it. There was no way he could kill her now.
“You fucking better know what you’re doing,” Huck snarled. “I don’t care if you came from the shield of a six-thousand-year-old warrior. It’s your fault I even need a home. And while I’m at it, fucking warn me with a blip or something before you crash your condescending tail on my ass. Tonans are supposed to lie.”
Growling Huck put the shuttle on auto pilot. He went to his shield generator and stepped inside. He needed to think, he needed to understand if his feelings were his, hers, or the shield’s. It didn’t take long before his heritage of evil and his fate of Tonan needs settled into a fine line. There was evil inside of him, there was compassion, there was hate and an urge to throw the female from the shuttle.
Huck envisioned Becky hovering between the shuttle door and the open space. A simple shove and his destiny would be delivered. He would have no choice but to return to the other rebel Tonan. He would die. A thought wandered into his mind, his shield protected him, and his shield controlled certain aspects. When confronted with terrified human females, Huck always allowed his shield to guide him. Huck mentally pushed Becky from the shuttle. He watched her flounder and die in space. The thought didn’t make his heart race, but he heard his shield give a tiny squeal.
If Huck gave in and killed Becky, his shield would be his alone, free of encumbrance. He could kill his conscience, make it turn off and abandon his thoughts. The shield of his stepfather couldn’t function with pure evil. He would maintain the shield, but the essence would be destroyed. After twelve hundred years it would be odd to control his shield. He would be alone with himself. The idea was disturbing.
“I won’t kill the female,” he said aloud.
If he did, Huck sensed he would kill the best part of his shield, the part that cared if he lived or died. His shield would protect him regardless, but it would do it for its own sake. It was no wonder his counterparts were cruel. Nothing cared for them, not even their shields. It was the first time in Huck’s life he realized what his stepfather gave to him. A gift meant for his true son. His stepfather was in must when he mated his mother because Huck wasn’t his, he gave him a part to make him a part of him.
He wasn’t in fact my stepfather but my half father.
“Huh, all this time and I never realized,” Huck muttered. “No wonder Castians are such fierce fighters. They want their shield to survive, not just to protect them. My shield loves me. Fuck. That is way too intense.”
If Huck hadn’t known better, he thought his shield chuckled.
Chapter 4
For a moment, Becky panicked when she had a hard time moving. She was pinned in a bed. Her gaze fled around the room, and she took a deep breath. She was on the Tonan vessel in the room with the bed, alone. What her arms battled against was a comforter tucked into the mattress keeping her semi-immobile. She hadn’t gone to sleep with anything over her. Huck must have wrapped her in it after she fell asleep.
“Holy tuck, Huck.”
If he learned how to do this from his mother, he must have been a restless sleeper when he was young. The idea startled her. His mother? Well he must have had a mother at some point. Picturing him as a little boy while she commando attacked her restraints was strange. At one time that massive warrior had to have been a baby. When her feet finally hit the floor, she breathed a sigh of relief. Trapped with her thoughts while trapped in a bed was unnerving. Now was not the time to think about her captor as anything but the enemy.
Becky peered into the other room and could make out Huck’s still form. She stepped around the chamber holding him. A warm glow surrounded the device. He was shielded and sitting comfortably on a rounded backed chair made of a strange substance, a cross between metal and hide. He appeared to be sleeping. It was hard to tell with the protruding bulbs where his eyes should sit. The black tattoo on his cheeks pulsated and glowed. The intricate markings appeared to be some type of ancient writing. Two perfectly white fangs nestled next to his lips near his chin and she shuddered.
The long talons on his hands sparkled when he shifted and she froze. He remained quiet. For all she knew, he could be silently watching her while she watched him. The beating of her heart pounded into her ears. Even when he was not moving, she saw how deadly every inch of him was. No wonder humans on Earth were terrified of these aliens. Humans never stood a chance. The blips of the console attracted her attention and Becky shuffled over, watching Huck as she moved.
The night before he’d scared her and Becky was stunned. It had been a long time since she felt real fear. After her father’s death, she was certain the emotion was gone. Her worst nightmare had already come true, what was there left to be afraid of? The risk of always being at death’s door conditioned her to expect death. Over time a cavalier attitude developed. So what if she died? Everyone would die eventually. It wasn’t how she wanted to live.
The monitor above the console was littered with planets. A map she guessed, always rotating. Huck was taking her somewhere. She punched a few buttons but nothing changed. The control panel was locked. Of course it would be. She was trapped. For a moment she wondered how the men fared. Raymond in particular. He was a good man, sweet, kind. He didn’t deserve to die; she hoped Huck was wrong about the shuttle being on its last legs. The time they spent alone on Earth they’d laughed, cried a few wayward tears and stuck together. He was more man than the rest of the bunch.
“Damn,” she whispered.
“We need time to get to know one another. At least my shield says so.”
She spun to see Huck, without his shield watching her a few steps away.
“Why not simply tell Cobra you want to join with him?”
“It won’t work. It wouldn’t be deceptive, but a human female adds something to a warrior he needs.”
“Such as?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never mated a human female before. I simply know it’s part of the deal. Maybe it has to do with deeper emotion.”
“Great,” she muttered under her breath.
Huck moved closer and placed his hands on her bare shoulders. Her skin tingled. The urge to pull away was met with resistance and instead, she moved into him.
“What the hell is that?” she asked. The sensation was curious, wanting to feel him yet fighting the urge.
“My shield is getting to know you. It has sensed we are good for each other.”
“Your shield? You say that like it’s a living entity.”
“It is.”
“That’s nuts.”
“Why? Because you don’t have one so it must be? My shield is from my stepf
ather. I have images I can call upon from my bio father and my stepfather.”
“How can your shield be from a stepfather? It comes out of you; at least it looks like it does.”
“My stepfather was very old, an incredibly powerful warrior. Humans grow infirm with age, a Tonan does not. He loved my mother, and his shield knew the best way to protect her was to give her a piece. The shield is a gift of love, there is no greater. He gave me a piece of him.”
Huck sounded amazed and humbled. This was a different side to him. “Where are we going?”
“A quiet place. I need to think. We’ll be safe.”
“We or you?”
Huck chuckled. “We. I’m safe because, well, I’m me. You’ll be safe because, well, again I’m me.”
“More stinky creatures to wow me?”
“Nope. Nothing to harm you.”
She peeked around him, but his tail didn’t grow. The scene on the monitor changed, and Becky stared at the planet; it was white and black in shadows. She frowned in concentration. Spooky. Ghostly. For a moment, Huck pulled her back further and more of her shoulders rested against his bare chest. Sensations of emotions swirled through her. Something told her there was more to the complexity of what he wanted from her.
“I won’t mate you.”
He stiffened then relaxed. “If we were on my planet, you would have no choice.”
“We’re not on your planet.”
“My planet is as lost to me as Earth is to you. Everything I know is disappearing. Cobra and his warriors and others live on a beautiful planet, I’ve seen images. But there is war. I’m selfish and arrogant, but I know I can help protect their way of life because it will be my way of life. I have to try.”
There was a hint of desperation in his tone. She wondered how long he’d been alone wandering the universe. For a moment, she understood his grief. Space was a large void to fill. Too many thoughts over too many miles. Darkness wasn’t the glamour of the final frontier when the endlessness was what was final and infinite.
“Maybe there is still time for you to find another female.” Her words were hushed but not cruel.
“I’ve been out here months. You’re the first living human female I have come across. I’m guessing you’ll be the last. My last. You have no idea the devastation your people have suffered. Yes, at Tonan hands. I understand why you don’t want me. You don’t understand why I need you. My shield isn’t cruel, but I sense it wishes you would cry. It can absorb emotion to help it sense you better.”
“I don’t cry often, and sure as hell not on command. I’m broken, Huck. I’m also fierce as hell. What I saw on Earth hurt my soul. A certain sex doesn’t make a warrior. A desire to have someone watch my back was replaced with me wanting only me to take care of me. I make me fine.”
“Then we make a great pair. I need you. I never said I want you. You need me; you don’t have to want me either.”
The planet came into view, closer. They hovered near the atmosphere. Huck turned her in his arms. His warmth was intrusive. His scent filled her.
“I don’t think I can love a female because of my biological father; he was evil to the core. That makes part of me evil, too,” Huck said. “My nature is as confusing to me now as it was when I was small. My shield has my back; I don’t want you watching it. I only need you to belong with a hive, nothing more. You may think you don’t need me, but I can sense you’re wounded. If I sense that, so will a Castian warrior. You war within yourself. There is a buildup of rage, a fury so intense you would battle anything to make the pain go away. The scent is suspicious. Deceptive and combative. Not unpleasant to a Tonan, more compelling. Cobra, a Castian, will take one whiff of you and put you somewhere until he can deal with you. Dissect your emotions to make certain you are harmless when there is a war going on inside of you. That will take time. If we show up on his doorstep the way we are, we may both be rejected.”
“So what?” she challenged. “I couldn’t care less what Cobra or anyone thinks.”
“Endless wandering is on the other side of a tarnished coin. The universe is empty as hell or can be. When you kick ass, make certain it’s the right ass you kick for the right reason.”
The shuttle settled on the planet with a small bump. He stepped away from her and for a second, she missed his contact. The replicator came to life when Huck programed meat, cheese and bread to be served in a satchel for travel. Huck pushed the brown leather bag into her hands and moved to the shuttle door. His head bowed.
Becky sidled up beside him. Her life had crumbled so many times, what was once more? “Maybe we both need time to think.” She fingered the heavy bag, the contents made her belly rumble. If nothing else, he provided for her.
“This is a good place to start.” With a grand gesture he opened the door and waved his hand; she was to leave. The first step was the hardest, but she ventured forth into daylight.
Her bare feet hit the semi-hard ground. Dark earth was cool beneath her skin. The air was pure and warm, sweet. Each new planet was a gift of existence in a world and life gone to hell. Earth was dead and yet other planets were fueled with abundance. Becky gazed around in awe. Colors were vibrant, deep shades of greens, purples, and blues. Plant life was lavish. For a moment she froze and resisted the urge to press against Huck who stood a hand’s reach beside her. Mystical creatures coming into view were dark shadow figures breezing in and around and through the foliage. Everything appeared to be without substance.
What the hell?
Her gaze was intense. Animals were mist. Creatures a haze. When she touched an animal her hand went through it, scattering particles of silver to dance in the sunlight. Swirling beads of mist circled in a small and slow tornado of movement to recreate the form. The plant she reached for next was smooth and warm, real. The animal mist she touched again, her fingers went through it, and once again scattered. The silver beads floated, swirled and went back to rest as a whole. Huck was standing, watching her, his shield down, he remained within arm’s reach. His blue eyes fixated on her.
“What is this place?” Becky’s voice was barely above a whisper she was so entranced.
“Humans would call it purgatory.”
“Purgatory? Do you know what that means to a human?”
“Not hell. Not what Earth became. I’m not that cruel to bring you to a place suffering what Earth has gone through. Which surprises me. This is more a place of reckoning and ending, and a beginning and in between. Do you see the beings?”
“Yes.”
“Don’t be afraid. I wasn’t certain you could see these things.”
“I’m not afraid.”
Huck sighed. “Yes, I know. But I sense a small hesitance.”
Startled, Becky stepped back as an alien creature, obviously male and an alien female came into her sight. They were arguing but no sound was heard. The female was furious, her motion erratic. Becky moved closer. Huck went to stand beside her. She waved her hand between the two. Neither alien noticed her and continued their heated motion. The male was her height, the female a head smaller. Their bodies were thin, elfin. Their clothing was soft fluttering material exposing various body parts in a way a theatre performance would deem enchanting, alluring and provocative.
“What are they?” Becky asked.
“LoCanns. They are from a galaxy too far for my shuttle to reach. A strange being, but harmless. If Tonans were to invade their planet the little aliens would all die.”
“Why can I see their images?”
“They’re dead on their planet. There are creatures who come here after their life expires and wait to join with their counterparts on different worlds. Once all counterparts are dead they reabsorb into the universe and some are recreated.”
Becky gazed up at him. “Great, I see dead people. Everything here is dead?”
“Not everything. There is nothing on this planet I can’t protect you from. I need some time to think. I believe we established that. Look at death, Becky. It’s r
ight in front of your face. Scream at it, no matter what you do, it won’t see you. You don’t exist in death because you can’t see life. The loneliness, the oblivion. It’s how I feel and I hate the feeling. I exist and no one sees me unless they want me dead. It’s how I’ve lived my life for the last four hundred years.”
There was a change in Huck when she woke; it was more than apparent now. He mentioned nothing of mating. Becky wondered if he brought her here to kill her or mate her. Neither was a happy thought. He said he needed her but could change his mind. Huck strode off a few feet, and Becky caught sight of two little animals playing. They were shadows, dead. They looked happy but at a closer glance there was nothing else with them. No toys, no plant life. Their little legs didn’t make contact with the ground; there was no ground for them, no substance. For a moment, Becky’s heart raced.
“If you kill me here, will I look like these things in ghost form?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never seen a human on this planet. There really isn’t anything here for a Tonan warrior. There’s been no need to return after our initial exploration. Dead is dead, I can’t kill these things all over.”
“Why do you kill?”
“I’m a warrior.”
“Not all warriors kill.”
“Are there not warriors where you come from who like to kill?”
“I suppose, but Earth is dead so kinda a moot point.”
“You have nothing left. There is nowhere for you to go. I don’t plan on killing you.”
“Are you telling me to mate with you again?”
“No. A forced mating is no mating at all. Cobra wouldn’t accept either of us. Me because he would think I’m evil and you because if he killed me it would mean your death.”
MINE! [New World Book 8] Page 5