by Ward, H. M.
His lips parted as he looked into my face, as his eyes narrowed to untrusting slits. I cracked my jaw to speak, but he reached for me. His hand shot out, pulling my arms away from my chest. Then his thumb slid along the top of my bra, making my heart leap into my throat. He stared at the patch of soft, white flesh. There was no dark line marring my breast. The sapphire serum appeared to be gone. There was nothing but smooth skin. Twisting out of his reach, I grabbed the remnants of my shirt and clutched them to my chest.
I wanted him to understand, but he didn’t. He couldn’t. He sucked in a sharp breath and dropped his hand. “He healed you.” His words were scarily calm. His eyes were suddenly sucked free of anger. Looking into my face, he asked, “What was the price?” My lips parted, but I couldn’t speak. I leaned away from him. “What was the price!” Turning abruptly, he snapped off one of the posters and hurled it across the room. The massive piece of carved wood slammed into the bookcase, tearing away a chunk of wood as it bounced away, and shattered the mirror. Shards of glass flew through the room, sprinkling across the floor like a can of spilled glitter.
“Collin, stop!” I screamed. He turned slowly toward me. His back was curved, ready to fight. Crimson pooled in his blue eyes making them burn like hot coals. Gasping, I backed away from him. Nothing I said would reach him now. Not like this. I tried to slide past him, but he caught my arm. His fingers pressed hard into my flesh. I moved to twist out of his grasp. There was something in his eyes I hadn’t seen in a very long time.
Lust. The desire for a demon kiss. His eyes fixated on me. Their intensity made me feel entirely naked. It was as if I’d been stripped of everything as I stood before him. My breath caught in my throat.
Nodding slowly, talking softly I pressed my fingers on top of his hand—the hand that held my arm. “It’s all right. It’s all right, my love.” I slowly peeled away his fingers as I felt his grip loosen. “You’re starving… ” I asked looking into his eyes as I peeled away another finger. “Aren’t you? It’ll be all right, Collin. Just breathe. Breathe and I’ll help you.” I peeled away the last finger. An inky bruise was blossoming in four narrow patches where he’d held me. I ignored it. It would fade. Collin fought every instinct he had. His eyes remained locked on mine. I couldn’t look away. When I’d freed my arm, I placed my hands on his face and stroked his cheeks, slowly speaking softly to him until the tension that made his body shake ebbed.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
As I watched him fight for control of himself, I could see it in his eyes. Collin’s eyes swirled with deep red flames, burning bright, around the outer iris. The center of his pupil was a tiny black dot. And every shade of flame and fire burned in between. It moved as if liquid within his eyes. Slowly, slowly the reds faded to oranges, and then swirls of blue appeared. They were nearly stripped of color initially, but as I rested my palms on his cheeks, I saw his eyes return to the color of the sea after a storm.
Leaning toward him, my hands were still on his cheeks. He blinked, and looked down, breaking the gentle hold I had on his face. “I’m sorry.” He rose and walked away from me. His arms were folded over his chest. He stared at the floor, seeing nothing. “I denied myself too long. It made me… weak.”
I remained where I was, sitting on the floor looking up at him. “You don’t have to do everything on your own.” My words drifted through the air like a dandelion caught in the wind. He turned toward me slowly with a pained expression on his face. “My fate is set in stone… ” I smiled sadly, “It’s set. I can’t change it.” I rose and walked over to him. I stopped in front of him, looking up to catch his gaze. “You can’t change it. You can’t protect me from this. I have to do it myself. And I need you to let me.”
He glanced down at me. His arms were still folded tightly, pressing into his chest. “You and I… ” he stumbled over his words. The tense posture he held melted and his arms fell to his sides. Turning his head away from me, he ran his hands through his hair. “You and I… ” his mouth hung open. It was as if he wanted to say something but couldn’t. “Our fates… our destinies are intertwined, Ivy. If you accept one part of the prophecy, then you have to accept all of it.” His fingers reached for the hair on my shoulder. He pressed the long curl between his fingers, and looked up at me. “Is that what you want?”
Shaking my head, the brown curl fell away. I stepped toward him, “What are you talking about?”
His lips parted, as his eyes shot to the floor. A dim smile pulled at the corner of his mouth. “I die. The prophecy says I die. You and I cannot coexist if the prophecy is fulfilled.” He shook his head as if it could undo the words.
My gaze fell to the floor as my jaw dropped open. “I thought that had already come to pass?” Collin’s eyebrow arched as he looked at my face. “On Long Island, the night of the Valefar attack… ” I sighed shaking my head… suddenly shaking all over, “Didn’t it? We changed it, didn’t we?” My eyebrows rose as I spoke, saying words that I knew weren’t true. My fingers were at my mouth, pressing on my lips as I thought.
The look on his face said we didn’t change a thing. The look on his face said I didn’t realize things yet. He shook his head. A wan smile made him look more sad than happy. “Nothing’s changed. If you accept the prophecy is real, you accept all of it. You will defeat Kreturus, and become the Demon Queen. The world will end at your hands. The Martis will be destroyed. The Valefar will be annihilated. You will cause the gates of Hell to be flung open and the innocent to perish… ” His eyes searched my face as he spoke. He looked away, his voice dropping to a whisper, “And I will die. It’s my fate, as this is yours.”
Something was choking me. I couldn’t breathe. My throat was so tight that air would not slide down it and into my lungs. What did Locoicia do to me? My body still responded to his words, but I couldn’t feel the warnings my mind shot out. Fear would have told me what was going to happen. The sensation of dread pooling in my stomach would have prompted me to speak. But I didn’t. Instead, I stared at Collin, unable move.
His words were words I’d heard before, but never really accepted. Collin told me that the prophecy said he would die by my hand. It was as clear as me being the one to cause the floodgates of Hell to burst open. But that part, Collin’s death, the Martis weren’t concerned about. I didn’t hear it over and over again. I pushed the thought to the back of mind, hoping that it was no longer true. Of the paintings I’d seen in the Lorren, the prophecies of death and destruction—not one showed me killing the boy who stood in front of me. But I knew that part of the prophecy, and I’d been fighting it. Denying it. I denied it until I accepted Locoicia’s help. Until I made the bargain.
My gaze rushed to Collin. He stood motionless, waiting for me. Waiting for me to realize what he already knew. The prophecy destroyed everything, and everyone.
Even him.
There was no justice. There was no happy ending. These things would come to pass, and I was the one who caused them. I gaped, my jaw hanging open, trying to speak—trying to breathe.
Collin lifted his hands and rested them on my cheeks. His head tilted to the side. Dark brown hair slid into his eyes, eyes that sparkled like brilliant blue gemstones. Eyes that would cease to exist because of me. “I can’t accept it. I can’t accept the prophecy. It’s not my fate. I can’t let it be. I’ll fight it ‘til I die.” He shook his head. There was a sadness deep within that laced his voice. “But, it sounds like you already have accepted your fate. In which case, we are enemies. Ivy… ” he blinked once before he pulled his grip away, before he pulled himself out of my life. “This is the en… ”
I cut off his words, his horrible words, and snatched his hand, shaking my head—shaking all over. “No. No, you can’t be serious. This doesn’t end this way. It doesn’t!”
He pulled away from me again, and looked down. “We both know how it ends, but I can’t accept it. I have to fight.” He reached for a loose curl, twisting it in his fingers as he spoke, “I always thought that we’d fi
nd a way, you know. I thought you and I could change things.” He dropped the curl and stepped back. “But, there’s nothing we can do. And I can’t sit around and wait for my death. I have to leave. I have to fight it—I have to.” His foot slid away, another step that felt like a mile. “And I… I am the reason why it began in the first place.” His gaze flicked to mine, and then broke again. “There are words I can’t say, just as there are words you can’t say. Blood bargains. Names. Things I’m sworn to do. Things I wish,” he pressed his eyes closed and breathed.
When he looked back up at me again, his gaze was distant. Cold. “Beware the one you made your blood bargain with. Break it if there is any possibility. It is the only way you’ll win. The demons twist words, they twist meanings… ” he swallowed hard, staring at me like he’d never see me again. He pressed his lips together and spoke, “I can’t say more than that. Don’t default on your end of the bargain, but try to break it. Please.” Heat began to build around him. He was going to effonate. I’d never see him again.
My eyes were wide. Panic choked my throat, but I couldn’t feel it. Numbness tingled, covering my entire body. “Collin. You can’t leave. We can’t end things like this.” The heat stopped. My heart stopped, jerking in my chest. My jaw hung open. My lips were silent, not speaking things that were locked in my heart—things he’d never hear.
Collin looked down, away from me. There was something in his face, a desperation that made him say the words, “Then join Kreturus and end this.” Shock kicked me in the stomach as the words tumbled out. I lurched back away from him as my mouth hung open. He half smiled, “There is no other way to for this to stop. There are two choices; you fight him to the death… Or you join him.” The corners of Collin’s lips twitched as they pulled into a smile so soft and fragile. The shock of his words were still choking me like fingers around my neck. I didn’t speak. Collin’s gaze swept over me. “I knew you wouldn’t join him,” his voice was soft, accepting the unacceptable. “Everyone knows you won’t join him, but that’s the only scenario in which you and I are both still breathing in the end.”
Shaking my head, I said, “It’s not fair. It’s not.” I stared up at him, knowing that we’d never be alone again. We’d never have another moment. My eyelids pressed shut as I felt moisture build behind them. Collin’s fingers stroked my cheek. I gazed up at him.
He dropped his hand and heat surrounded him again. He’d be gone in an instant. “Break the bargain. Pray for a mistake.” His body was absorbed and the intense heat that surrounded him was quashed as quickly as it formed.
I stood alone in Collin’s bedroom. I was surrounded by shattered, splintered, cracked, broken… things.
I was one of those things.
The bond was broken. And I was the one who broke it. It was fading. Dying. The bond was a distant echo of what had once been a powerful connection.
Collin was gone. He would die if I didn’t join Kreturus. I couldn’t. I wouldn’t. Everyone knew.
Collin would die. Collin will die… because of me. There wasn’t enough air.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Eric. I needed Eric. He’d know what to do. But he was crazy. I kicked a snow drift as I walked through its center outside of Collin’s home. The dry snow flew through the air and back into my face. It stung like little needles as it clung to my skin and melted on contact. The Valefar were gone. The Martis were gone. No one was here. I was alone. I wiped my face with a gloved hand. I’d borrowed some of Collin’s winter clothes, since I had none. The leather coat smelled like him. My fingers slid into his gloves and made me remember his hands on my body. I suppressed the memory.
It was pointless.
And to make matters worse, I actually thought about giving myself to Kreturus. The lack of his presence concerned me, but just because I didn’t see him, didn’t mean he wasn’t nearby. Maybe he made Collin say those words. Pressing my eyes closed, I walked onward through the snow, to nowhere. I could effonate, but I needed to feel something. I let the cold bite into the flesh on my face, as snowflakes and wind whipped through my hair. My curls were wet as they clung half frozen to my shoulders.
Eric. Eric knew where the Satan’s Stone was. That rock could be the answer to everything. It could undo everything. It could heal me, free Collin, and stop the war that was about to begin. The gates of Hell could not and would not open. Not if I could stop it. The stone could stop it. The stone had stopped it before.
Maybe Collin was right. Maybe I hadn’t accepted my fate. I didn’t have time to consider it. I had to find that stone. I had to find Eric. It surprised me that Eric made no effort to find me after our last meeting. I kicked more snow into the air. Speckles of white blinded me for a moment as I walked through the cloud of snow. The sting on my skin felt good.
Since I’d been learning from Ilecica, my ability to feel sensations had been hindered. Hindered is the wrong word. My ability to feel was out of whack. I felt some things, but not others. It made me wonder if I could feel my arm if I set it on fire. I didn’t understand how I could feel good as Collin’s hands slid over my skin, but not feel the right emotions when he left. The entire time he spoke, it felt like someone was strangling me. If I’d felt something –anything—besides invisible fingers squeezing the air out of my lungs, maybe I could have changed things. Maybe I could have convinced Collin that we weren’t enemies. But I didn’t. And now he was gone.
I kicked another pile of snow and walked through it. Eric. I had to find Eric. He could find Satan’s Stone. He had the book. My fingers tensed, as I thought about it. I needed that rock. That stone was my salvation. That stone had fabled power that was stronger than any of us. I had to get my hands on it, but Eric had the book—the useless book that no one could read. The book that connected things Eric had once known about Satan’s Stone. Things he forgot because of me. It didn’t matter. He had the book. That was enough. We’d figure out how to read it, and I’d kill him if I had to. Screw Lorren and his ward.
My eyes scanned the winter white blanket of ground in front of me. I walked. My feet crunched over snow and ice and frozen ground. Barren trees stuck up out of the snow like bony hands reaching for the warmth of the sun. A smile slowly slid across my frozen face. I knew where he’d be. Without another thought, I effonated to the place.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Eerie quietness surrounded me as I shrouded myself with shadows, calling them to me like ink seeping into a quill. They moved towards me quickly. Quietly. Their corpse-like fingers stroked my throat and stomach as they entered me, but I no longer felt the pain. The sound of snow filled my ears as it fell from the heavens and softly touched the earth. It was utterly quiet.
The brown building stood in stark contrast to the pure white that covered its roof like a woolen blanket. The building itself was dark. Not a single light was blazing within the windows of St. Bart’s. I stood at the side entrance on the inside of a seldom used door, and moved through the shadowed hallways. Cobwebs clung to the corners of the walls, filling nooks with silvery threads. A thick layer of dust carpeted the dark wood floors making it look as if it snowed inside. There wasn’t a single footprint to be found. The building was deserted. No one had been here since Al left. The nuns had left. The church was gone.
This was no longer holy ground.
Eric was here. I was sure of it. My feet slid down the darkened halls puncturing the perfect dust, leaving long trails on the floor behind me. Turning, I saw the entrance into the nave. Moving ever so slowly, I slid one foot at a time—one breath at a time—until I was near the back rows of benches. Sunlight poured in through an overhead window making small beams of light pour down from the ceiling. Within the beams dust danced as it fell softly to the floor. Sliding past pews, I remained in the shadows, moving through the darkness still half frozen from being soaked by the snow.
A lone figure sat with his back to me at the front of the church. He was arrogantly sitting on the altar with his legs hung over the sides. His hands gripped
the wooden table as he looked up to the colored glass high above. The bright winter sun shone through the window casting a kaleidoscope of color on the dark carpet. The patchwork of color also touched Eric’s arms and head. He held out his fingers, twisting his wrist, examining the light as if he were holding a piece of sunshine in his palm.
I slid my feet closer and closer. There wasn’t a sound. Not a single noise that let him know I was so close. So very close. My comb was already drawn. The tines were extended. I barely breathed as I neared his back. The wood altar under him was in the way, but the element of surprise was too great to throw away. I made my decision. Sliding up behind him, I got so close that if I breathed, he’d feel me. As Eric continued to contemplate the colored glass, I moved my head so that my mouth was next to his right ear.