“You really don’t have to stay and help if you’re tired.”
I smile as I place the unused plates back into the cupboards.
“No, it’s okay, I’ll stay.” she smiles back.
“Alright. Well, I’m glad everyone had a good time.” I reply.
“Yeah, we should do that more often! And I’m sorry if I was really heavy on your shoulders.”
“You? Don’t be silly.” I roll my eyes at the thought. She was light as a feather.
“Totally crazy about Cameron though, right? Did you know they were dating?” she asks.
“No, I had no idea.” I laugh and shake my head. I can’t imagine it will last very long, although he’s never brought anyone else out. Maybe he does actually like someone for a change.
After an awkward pause, we laugh a little and Ella yawns again.
“You know what, I think I might actually head to bed now,” she says.
“Alright, let me know if you need anything.”
“I’ll be okay.”
She goes to walk past me, but I accidentally step into her way, thinking she was going to walk the other way. We both reacted, but ended up moving the wrong way again, this time laughing about it.
So, like an idiot I decide to grab her by the waist, lift her up and turn her around, placing her down on the other side of me.
She giggles and blushes uncontrollably, “Suppose I should have tried that first.”
“Sorry,” I laugh awkwardly, “Uh, goodnight.”
“Goodnight,” she says turning and walking away.
She heads to the stairs and I can’t take my eyes off of her. Just before she hits the bottom step, she looks back at me and smiles before disappearing upstairs. I laugh to myself.
She looked back.
Chapter 18
Ella
“Thanks for taking me out again. This is really sweet of you, Joe. But I don’t get it. You don’t have to do this for me,” I say, as Joe and I look up over our plates.
I can’t believe I’m at an even fancier restaurant, after another ride in his limo, and looking down at the city glowing beneath me. This is insane!
“Oh not at all, I just wanted to thank you. Marnie has been doing really well at school and she’s fitting in nicely now. Thank you for giving her confidence,” he says.
I can’t help blushing, “Aw that’s really sweet. Well I’m glad you’re happy and everything is working out.”
“And besides, we’re friends aren’t we? Why can’t I take you out for a nice dinner?”
“No complaints from me.” I grin like an idiot, glad that Marnie is staying over at a friend’s tonight. It makes me feel better about letting off a little steam. Maybe I should get a drink?
“Are you alright? Can I get you anything?” he asks.
“Uh, yeah actually I think I’ll go and get a drink.” I go to stand, “Do you want anything?”
“No, that’s fine, do you want me to call the waiter?”
“Oh, no it’s fine. It’s busy, I’ll just go to the bar. Plus, it’ll be nice to have a little look around here.”
“Hmm, okay then, don’t be long! Your food will get cold,” he laughs.
I turn and head to the bar, or at least where I think the bar should be. This place is so big! I’m surprised it fits up here in this tower. It looks so small from all the way down on the ground I guess. But up here everything else looks so tiny, and I feel so big, so confident and tall.
I guess that’s what Joe makes me feel—like I’m somebody, like I matter. It’s a really great feeling since lately I’ve felt like I’ve been foundering, failing and fading away in my tiny little neighborhood.
Yes! There’s the bar, maybe I’ll get a cocktail or something. This place is probably way too posh for a beer. I laugh to myself, they’d probably serve it in a tall glass with a weird shape or one that looks like a pear shaped woman.
It’s a glass for heaven’s sake, it doesn’t need an ass.
“Are you lost little girl?” an older man next to me says, accompanied by laughter from his friends.
Just ignore him, come on. You’re better than him.
“I’m sorry, I’m talking to you,” he says, more sternly this time.
The bartender comes over to serve me, “Hey there, what can I get you?”
Before I even open my mouth to speak, the guy chimes in.
“I’ll have another scotch and she’ll have a vodka with lime and soda. That’s what you girls drink right?”
“Actually, I was going to have a beer. Whichever one is the most expensive.”
Fuck it, I’m not gonna put up with that. If I want a beer I’m going to have a damn beer.
“Of course, I’ll put it on Mr. Abercrombie’s tab,” she says, before turning to get my drink.
“And how do you expect you’re going to pay for that, missy?” the guy asks, and again before I can reply, he speaks, “You on your sugar daddy’s tab or something?”
“Excuse me?” I ask.
“I’ve seen you over there. You like the older men don’t you? So why then, would you be so rude and ungrateful to me? I offered to buy you a drink, and not even a thank you?” His words are met with grumbles of agreement.
I can’t believe it, even in a nice place like this you still get lecherous old men. This is why I hardly ever go out with Kat and Cam. It’s like I’m preyed upon by these guys. I hate it.
The bartender comes back with my drink, and hands me a napkin.
“Thanks,” I say hastily, trying to get away from this ass.
“Oh, come on, there’s no need to be like that,” he says, putting his hand on my waist to pull me back.
“I’m sorry. What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I snap at him. His pulling on me like that spilled some of my drink on my arm.
“There’s no need to get mad, love. Buying you a drink is just paying you a compliment. Didn’t your mother ever teach you how to say thank you?”
Ooh! This really gets me mad. I storm off to my table and the guy continues laughing with his friends. Why do some guys have to be such jerks?
I get back to the table where Joe is waiting. He smiles and stands as I go to sit down. Okay, so maybe not all guys, sometimes you get one who is just impossibly amazing.
“Something wrong?” he asks.
“Nothing, it doesn’t matter,” I said, wiping the beer off of my arm with the napkin.
“Are you sure? How did you spill that?” he asks, worried.
“Really, it’s fine. It was just some jerk at the bar.”
“Seriously? Here? Where is he?” He sits up straight now, a little angry.
“Just that guy over there,” nodding at him as he and his buddies head out to the terrace for a smoke.
“I’m going to go have a word with him,” he says, ready to stand.
“No, Joe. Please. Don’t make a big deal out of this, it’s just some guy being stupid. I don’t care, let’s not let it ruin the evening, okay?”
“Okay fine, if you wish. “ However, he doesn’t sit down.
“Good.”
“I’m just going to go to the men’s room,” he says, leaving the table.
I sigh, I really didn’t want to cause any trouble. I slowly sip my drink, which tastes amazing. It is worth whatever it cost. I’m not even sure what it is, but it’s a shame that stupid dirt bag made me spill even a drop of it.
At least the server gave me a napkin. Maybe she knew it was going to happen? I look down at my arm and see a bit of ink smudged on it. How’d that get there?
I look at the napkin and see there’s a note written on it.
Normally we’d throw out guys like him, but he owns the building. Sorry.
Oh shoot, I really hope Joe doesn’t do anything—
“You, get the hell out of here! And take your little girlfriend with you!” I hear someone shouting from outside. Crap.
Joe runs in and grabs his coat. Then takes my arm and tries to pull me along.
“Come on,” he says, “No time to explain!”
I grab my coat and he whisks me away from the restaurant.
We stand awkwardly in the elevator for a moment, then he turns to face me and I notice the bruise appearing on his left eye and the cut on his lip.
“Oh my God, Joe! What happened?” I ask, stepping toward him.
“I went to go talk to him and, well, I guess it got heated.”
“What? I asked you not to.”
“Well, I technically didn’t talk to him, I may have just gone over and…” he pauses.
“Oh boy, what did you do?”
“I may have punched him in the face,” he said, showing me the bruises on his knuckle.
“Oh, Joe, why did you do that?” I ask, holding his hand and carefully checking it over.
“Well,” he says as we exit the elevator, “He upset you, and I guess I lost control when I saw you weren’t smiling anymore.”
“Oh Joe,” I smile. That’s the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. No one has ever fought for my honor before. Or has even been punched on my behalf. I really don’t know what to say.
* * *
The ride home was pretty quiet, I don’t think either of us really knew what to do exactly. I mean, I’ve never been in this situation. I don’t know if he has either. His poor face, I should take care of him now that we’re back at his… ours? No, it’s his place, I just live there.
I help Joe to his room and he drops back onto his bed. I stand there for a moment, wondering if it would be better for me to just leave or not.
“Let me clean the cuts for you at least.” I head into his bathroom and grab a towel and a wash cloth and soak it with warm water.
Heading back into his room, I find him on the edge of his bed looking worse for wear.
“This might sting a little,” I say, as I take his hand.
He breathes in sharply and tries to clench his fist, but can’t.
“Come on, don’t do that,” I say.
“You don’t have to do this, Ella. It was my stupid fault.”
“It’s a little swollen, should I get you some ice?”
“No, don’t,” he pulls his hand away, “Why are you doing this?”
I look up at him from where I sat next to him on the bed.
“No one has ever fought for me before.”
He calms down a little, “You’re kidding, someone as beautiful and sweet as you? What about all those guys?”
“You think I’m beautiful?” I can feel my cheeks going red again as he smiles up at me, it’s the most genuine smile I’ve ever seen. He flinches as his eye starts to hurt more.
“Ouch,” he says.
“Careful, here let me,” I hold his chin and carefully dab at the bruised part around his eye.
Our eyes lock and I freeze for a moment, “Just let me get the blood… off your… uh… lips.”
I drop the cloth and he pulls me forward, kissing me like he did on our last date. I try to be as gentle as I can, not wanting to hurt him, but struggling to keep myself under control.
Then I start to think about everything. How I’ve lied to him, kept stuff from him, that he doesn’t know me, not really. He just likes the idea of me, this cheerful twenty-four year old.
Oh God, now I’m crying! He’s definitely gonna notice that.
“Ella, are you okay?” he asks.
“I’m fine,” I say as I sniffle and wipe my eyes.
“Sorry, I shouldn’t have kissed you.”
“No, it’s not that,” I stop him. “It’s me. I’ve not been straight with you. I’m not who you think I am.”
“What do you mean?”
“There haven’t been loads of guys, or any guys for that matter. I… I’m sorry if I’ve led you on, but, I—I’m a virgin.” I hang my head a little.
“Oh Ella, why would you be afraid to tell me that?”
“I figured you would think that I was just some dumb kid.”
“No, Ella. Not at all,” he smiles, placing his hand on my knee. “If anything it just makes you even more beautiful. It’s good that you waited, and I wouldn’t want to take your innocence from you. You should share that with someone special.”
“That’s really sweet of you.” I place my hand on his, touched by his kind words.
“So, if you don’t mind, what happened to the guy you were going to move in with?”
Oh, why did you have to ask about him? I start to cry again and Joe holds me close.
“You don’t have to say,” he says, stroking my hair.
“No, it’s fine, you should know why I’m like this.” I can’t help pacing, I have to pace. I’m frazzled now, “So, it was my last semester at college and I was with a guy. We’d been together for most of senior year, so we were thinking about moving in together. It’s not like he never tried. He made lots of effort as well, setting stuff up for me, trying to be really romantic. But like, I didn’t ever feel up to it. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’ve done some stuff. I know what everything looks like. But, one night, he got angry with me, like all this time he’d been storing it up, waiting and waiting for me to finally change my mind, and to decide that I was ready. But I never did. He told me to stop teasing him. He said I was leading him on and stuff like that. He told me that by now I owed it to him and he was going to take it from me.”
I can see Joe getting angrier and angrier. Should I stop talking?
“I managed to get away, but he broke a couple of my ribs in the fight, I’ve still got marks all over my body. It looks horrible. I managed to hit him in the face. Kat found him the next day and almost put him in the hospital. I’ve not really been the same since that night.”
“Why are you telling me this?”
Oh God, I’ve upset him, and he’s mad at me.
“I was just trying to explain why I’m like this.”
“You don’t need to explain anything to me, Ella.” Smiling, he gently takes my hands.
“You are perfect just the way you are, and you don’t need to worry about this. It means so much to me that you would trust me with your story. But you shouldn’t have to tell me something like that to explain yourself. You don’t need to, and nothing you’re doing is wrong. I promise.”
I needed to hear that. Ever since that event I’ve found it hard to trust people. I feel like they’re judging me for being shy, or worrying about social interactions, or getting too clingy or pushing people away. I feel like I need to reveal this huge part of my life to explain myself, but I’ve done nothing wrong.
“Thanks,” I said with a smile.
He looks deep into my eyes, and wipes a stray tear from my cheek. I look down at his bruised lips and begin to feel like everything is okay. I know he’d never try to hurt me, and he has shown that he would stand up for me—protect me. Suddenly things feel right, and I feel like I can take on anything.
This is the moment.
Chapter 19
Ella
Joe and I look into each other’s eyes, he holds my hands and slowly leads me back over to the bed. I can feel my hands shaking, and know what I want to happen, but does he?
He smiles reassuringly and nods at me. I think that means he wants me to take control?
Come on, Ella, you can do this. Show him how much you care about him. Make this a moment to remember.
I lean forward, closing my eyes. Soon our lips lock, then he kisses me gently as his hands move to my waist. His lips are so soft, and I can feel the cut, it has stopped bleeding now, but it still feels pretty bad. I put my hand on his chin to hold his head still, then gently kiss the cut, trying to erase it with my affection.
With a gentle laugh from Joe, our kisses deepen. He runs his hand through my hair, pulling me closer, and with his other hand he strokes my thigh, slowly moving his hand up to my hips. My skin feels so sensitive and his gentle touch is driving me crazy. I wrap my hands around his shoulders and take off his jacket. Getting the idea, he works toward the same goal.
We throw our jackets to the floor and he grabs my waist then, pulling me closer to him. He runs his hands over my curves and slowly undoes the zipper on the back of my dress. I can handle this, really I can. Don’t be nervous, Ella.
Instead of removing my dress I keep it on for a moment, just letting him know that my half naked body is right there, but he can’t see it yet. That’s how you tease a man, right?
I slowly start to unbutton his shirt, and see a little blood on the collar. I open his shirt, exposing his muscular chest. I run my hands over his abs and through the thin layer of light brown hair on his chiseled torso.
My hands are trembling, and he looks me in the eye and holds my hand. He stands me up and slowly gets undressed, down to his boxers. I take a moment to admire his physique and he smiles at me, making sure to let me know I am in control of him, that he is submitting to me.
I suddenly feel very powerful and confident. Who cares if I’ve got scars, they are war wounds, evidence that I’ve been through a lot and have come out the other side. I realize that I have a choice in how I feel about them, and tonight I have decided that I’ll wear them like a badge of honor. I let my dress drop to the floor, leaving nothing between us but our underwear. He takes a moment to appreciate my selection, which happened to be matching and silky. I’m sure he’s liking it because I can see his cock getting harder in his pants.
We’re not doing anything though. Just looking at each other’s bodies. I like it, this moment of vulnerability.
He steps forward and places his hands on my waist, then leans in to whisper in my ear.
“You don’t have any scars,” he says, kissing my neck as he stands back again.
Could it be true? I turn to face his mirror and realize that he’s right.
“You look so beautiful,” he adds, smiling at me. “And Ella, you’d still be beautiful even if you did have scars.”
I stare for a moment, realizing that maybe my scars had been in my head, that I’d been thinking about it so much I hadn’t really gotten over it… until now.
I smile and can’t help laughing. My grin spreads across my face and Joe now looks confused. This is really happening, I’m so excited and I don’t want to hold back anymore. I want this to be amazing, for both of us.
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