Into the Wind_A Love Story

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Into the Wind_A Love Story Page 15

by Jaclyn M. Hawkes


  That worked for the first two days while he had it, but then when he seemed to be getting better, that same worry from when she was so sick before creased his brow. When she finally was able to begin feeling better, her body was still slow to regain strength and she was content to let him insist she stay in bed and rest for another few days. She’d come incredibly far from how ill she’d been, but she was still nowhere near being back to her original health.

  Her trunks from Salt Lake City finally arrived and for the first time, she could tell Lije was slightly uncomfortable with her as she unloaded clothing that was far more elegant than anything he’d ever seen her in, and certainly finer than she would ever need living and working on a ranch in the wilds of the Utah territory. She dug through to the bottom of the trunk to find the extra underclothing she’d been waiting for and some treasured letters from home, then repacked most of the other things and stored the trunks in the loft of the barn.

  The elegant evening dresses meant nothing to her and if they made her husband uncomfortable, she wanted them packed out of the way. The only reason she would even keep them was in case she would ever need them for something in the future. Or perhaps to show to her daughters and let them play dress up someday.

  That night, after they prayed, she snuggled over to Lije in bed and asked, “Lije, are you upset with me?”

  He shook his head where it nestled beside hers and asked tiredly, “No, should I be? Have you and Heidi been up to something I should be upset at?”

  “No, but you were quiet after I was digging through the trunks earlier. Did having too many clothes disappoint you?”

  He thought about that for a moment and then said, “It wasn’t that, Brek. It’s just that this is obviously a very different life than what you were living before meeting me. I just worry you will regret marrying me and leaving that lifestyle.”

  Slipping her smaller hand inside his large calloused one, she shook her own head. “I will never regret marrying you, Lije. On the contrary. This life is much more satisfying than pointless social gatherings with people I didn’t particularly like or have respect for. And marrying you doesn’t mean I have to completely leave that lifestyle behind. There may be times when we will both need to do things that will necessitate wearing finery. Whether it is functions here in America or some social gathering back home. I can still be a part of that if I wish.”

  “You can. I doubt I could ever fit into that world, Brekka. I’d hate to embarrass you.”

  She snuggled deeper into his neck. “You could fit easily into whatever you would ever need to, Lije Lauritzen. You’re the handsomest man I know and you have lovely manners and an inherent attraction about you. Not to mention that you are eminently astute about all things business and political. You underestimate yourself.”

  “I’m a farm boy from the desert.”

  “Whom I love dearly and am incredibly honored to be married to. You of all people should understand why I will always be eternally grateful it was you who came to that encampment. You are exactly the one I needed then and forever. I could never regret you, Lije. Ever. You are my knight in shining armor and always will be. I am only grateful.”

  She stretched and kissed his chin and went on, “Everyone adores you, Lije, and the only ones who don’t already know you, who matter, are Father and Kristina and you will see. Someday, you will meet them and my father and sister will love you and our children just as I do.”

  He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her closer and began to kiss her temple, then her ear and a dreamy sigh escaped her lips as she whispered, “Perhaps the others will not love you just as I love you. But they will love you.

  Joseph Three Rivers stood perfectly still just under the crest of a ridge and studied the tracks in the snow on the ground in front of him. The temperature was well below freezing this early in the morning before the sun had even come up, but he remained still in spite of the cold. Movement would make him visible to whoever, or whatever was out there. Patience was as innate to him as breathing.

  Although his mother was a member of the Koosharem band of Pauites, his father had been a white trapper and he’d had been raised with a little of both peoples’ ways. He knew enough of the Indian ways to know that the tracks he was seeing were White Stone scouting the hills around Rock Creek again. The fact that White Stone still wasn’t sure where the girl was spoke volumes about how loyal the Paiutes were to the Lauritzen family, although it was no wonder. Gerhardt Lauritzen had long been the person the Paiutes traded through because they knew he would always get them fair prices for their goods.

  Joseph also knew that after this many months, White Stone would stop at nothing to get to Lije Lauritzen’s woman. It had become more than simply a passion for a beautiful girl—and she was definitely the most beautiful girl in all the territory. It had become a vendetta. An obsession to both possess the girl, and to prove himself again to the braves around him.

  Still, after working for the Lauritzens for nearly a decade, Joseph was familiar enough with Lije Lauritzen to know that White Stone would most likely die trying. Not only did Lije near worship the girl, but he was also the strongest, hardest working, shrewdest, and most capable of men. No one would best him without a nearly superhuman effort. Not only that, but there was always at least one hand guarding the little valley that truly blossomed like a rose in the desert around it. And since Lije had brought the girl with the shining hair home, all the hands rode armed and ready at all times.

  The orders had been to shoot White Stone on sight. These Mormon settlers had been surprisingly peace-loving, still, they didn’t put up with anyone bothering their women. Joseph knew that sentiment had strengthened because of what the Mormon settlers had been through before moving here to the Utah territory more than twenty years earlier when scores of their wives and daughters had been horribly abused by anti-Mormon mobs.

  He looked at the tracks again and then turned his horse back down the ravine he’d ridden up to go back and report to Lije. No, White Stone was a good warrior, but Lije was a better one.

  It was nearly two weeks after they returned from Fillmore before Brekka dressed in her work clothing and cold weather things and appeared outside one morning ready to go check on the livestock with Lije again. The over protectiveness she’d been worried about materialized and she had to resort to practically wheedling to talk him into letting her go with him. Even then she first had to assure him that Dr. Newell had said she could ride for the first while of her pregnancy, and agree to let him bring her back to the house early so she wouldn’t become overly tired. And all the day long, Lije continually kept a look out around them like he always did.

  They left, riding side by side, with her deciding he was being ridiculous, but on the return trip, she was tired enough that she was again eternally grateful he was so good to take care of her. About every other day Lije would do something around the home place so that Brekka could stay home and work around the house and rest whenever she felt like it, which was often, thanks to her condition. The baby made her surprisingly tired.

  While he grumbled over his books, she helped to store and preserve all the good things Lije and his hired help had grown over the season, and wove peppers and garlic bulbs into rastras to hang in the cellar. Sometimes Heidi came and continued to help her learn to make jellies and all manner of preserves. Together they assembled a large set of wooden frames in the parlor, stretched fabric over it and made quilts. Big ones for her and Lije, and smaller ones for the baby. So much of her life here was completely new to her, but it was incredibly satisfying to learn that she was capable of helping her family be self sufficient.

  Other days, Lije would continue to take her with him, whether it was to feed livestock or any of a range of other ranch chores like bringing in firewood, repairing fence, or hunting for the bears and wildcats that would prey on the herds. For several days, they gathered pine nuts into baskets woven by the Paiutes to store in the fruit cellar and for two other days, they went
with Gerhardt, Lars, and Heidi and harvested wild honey. Lije always kept his revolver in a holster on his hip and his rifle in the scabbard on his saddle and, though he never made an issue of it, he was constantly alert for what was going on around wherever they were. Brekka knew he was watching for the Ute brave.

  Brekka tried to be amiable about pitching in with all of the ranch chores she had never encountered back home in Denmark, but on the day Lije let her come out to the corral while he and Lars and a couple of the hands branded and castrated horses, she didn’t do as well as she’d hoped. The smell of the burning hide and hair of the branding made her instantly sick to her stomach, and while she tried to down play that, the sight of the blood from the castrating pushed her over the edge and she barely made it out of the corral before losing her breakfast.

  Then, she felt worse because Lije insisted on walking her into the house and fussing over her until she finally convinced him she was fine and sent him back out again. Even then, she was miserably nauseated for most of the evening after that.

  Needless to say, the next week, just before Christmas, when Lije and Lars slaughtered a hog and set it to smoke, she wasn’t terribly helpful either. She was embarrassed to be too ill to help them, but Lije only smiled and took her back to the house and encouraged her to try sewing something for the baby.

  Christmas with the Lauritzens was a wonderful, merry family event and though the church had a concert and the neighbors came caroling and brought festive goodies, mostly, it was truly a peaceful celebration of the Christ child’s birth. On Christmas Eve, Brekka and Lije settled down before their cozy fire to read from the Bible and then from his well worn Book of Mormon and to Brekka it was the perfect way to welcome the holiday. Never had she been at peace such as she was here with her good husband. Even the fact that there was a barbaric Indian brave somewhere out there seemed far removed from her safe, warm home with Lije.

  The New Year came and went, and though it was more of a community celebration, she and Lije still chose to keep to themselves at home that night as they looked back over their time together and spoke of resolutions and plans for the coming year. Their lives had changed and come together in a series of seemingly milestone events, some heartbreaking and some wonderful, yet all of them culminating in what felt to the two of them like a fairytale romance.

  Even with the fear of the Ute White Stone, and the occasional rumblings of Luther still being around, their hopes for the coming year and their new baby brought an almost magical, sweet expectation with her tiny, rounding belly and those short days and long nights of January.

  Evenings, they sat long by the fire and spoke of hopes and dreams and baby names. Some nights, she taught him the customs and dances of her country and they waltzed in the parlor as she hummed out the music. Sometimes he tutored her in English and she asked questions about the Mormons and he taught her his gospel.

  Her slender belly grew, and her language skills and belief in his religion grew as well. By the time the February sun began to clear the south faces of snow, she asked Lije in English to baptize her. And although she knew he wanted to do so with all his heart, she wasn’t surprised when he insisted they wait at least until the ice was off the creek before they did it, to try to protect her from getting sick again.

  The last week in February, Heidi took Brekka into town to a quilting bee where the town women were making a wedding quilt. Still feeling like a newcomer who didn’t understand much English, and a trifle uncomfortable, Brekka sat quietly and quilted as she listened to the women chatter. Heidi leaned toward her and explained that there was an upcoming wedding and that it was a custom to make a quilt for a gift from the ladies of the community.

  After explaining, Brekka noticed Heidi watching her and she worked to keep her face stoic, even though she couldn’t help wondering, if this was the custom, why she and Lije hadn’t ever received a quilt, even though they’d been married more than five and a half months. Listening to the women’s excitement was almost a bit hurtful to her and she tried to remind herself that her and Lije’s marriage hadn’t exactly been a traditional affair. Still, for some reason, the quilt, or the lack of one stung, if she wanted to admit it.

  Heidi must have sensed her feelings, because they hadn’t been back in the buggy for two minutes when Heidi put her hand over Brekka’s and said, “Try not to let it bother you, Brekka. You didn’t get a quilt, but you got one of the two best men in the world. And they all know it. You showing up here flattened a lot of those mothers’ and their daughters’ dreams. And with you being ill and getting married so quickly, we didn’t get organized. I know it isn’t fair, but Lije is much better than a quilt.”

  What she said made sense. But it didn’t take away the sense of alienation that Brekka suddenly felt among those ladies.

  Lije noticed her quiet mood as soon as he came in that evening and gently pressed her until she told him what was wrong. For just a moment, she could see in his eyes that he thought being offended over not getting the quilt was silly, but then he gently put his arm around her and said, “I’m sorry going to the quilting made you sad, Brekka. I didn’t even realize the ladies made quilts for weddings. I know it’s not really about the quilt, but if it would help, we’ll get Heidi and the three of us will make the most amazing wedding quilt you’ve ever in your life seen. Dad and Lars would probably even pitch in and help too—if we promised not to tell anyone.”

  He grinned at her and pulled her into a hug and continued, “Don’t hold it against them, honey. You waltzed in here and got the ranch they had their eyes on.”

  It made her smile to picture him quilting. She knew he would do it too, after how he’d worked to stitch up her blouse when they were first up in the mountains. He was kind that way.

  She shook her head against him and teased him back, “It wasn’t necessarily the ranch they wanted, Lije. And you and I both know it. And it’s okay. I have quilts enough and more. It’s not that. It’s just that, I assumed . . . Foolish, I guess . . . I just assumed that women who belonged to Christ’s true church, would be more . . . fair, or forgiving, or something. I was so excited to have been suddenly blessed to belong to a bit of Enoch. You and your family and others I’ve met. The doctrine. I was thrilled to have found a more heavenlike people. But was I just being naïve? I’m beginning to realize that maybe Mormon society is not quite so perfect as I dreamed it would be. It’s silly, but it’s disappointing to lose that false impression. I wanted Enoch.”

  She looked up at him and he gave her a sad smile of understanding and nodded. “Sorry to steal your hopes of Enoch, sweetheart, but nope, even the Utah saints have feet of clay. Gosh, when you put it like that, we’re positively heathens. But we’re a heck of a lot better than some times and places. I promise. And in theory, we’re steadily working to get better and better. Be patient with us. We’ve got our flaws, but we also have our virtues. Don’t give up on us completely yet. Huh?”

  Placing a gentle hand to his cheek, she kissed him softly and assured him, “I will never give up on you—or your people, Lije. I am like Ruth. Your home is my home now and I will love them, whatever their feet are made of. After all, who has perfect feet? Certainly not me. And though your saints aren’t completely perfect, they seem wonderful people whom I look forward to becoming true friends with.” She grinned and added, “Once they forgive me for winning the handsomest and best husband in the land, of course. Now, are you ready for your dinner?”

  He smiled and went to nod his head and then as if on an afterthought, said, “Mmm, no.” and then leaned down and kissed her for several more minutes.

  March arrived, but it came in like the traditional lion with a huge blizzard that again covered all the south slopes with a new coat of pristine snow and drifts settled deeply into the washes and ravines. The new snow was beautiful, but it was that time of year when man and beast alike were looking forward to spring. The snow made all the chores take longer and Brekka found herself wanting to pitch in more than ever rather
than stay inside the house alone. Still, Lije insisted she wait at least until the snow stopped falling before venturing out into it.

  When the storm finally blew over, the sun came out gloriously and Brekka rode on the sleigh with Gerhardt driving as Lije, Lars, and Josh threw hay out to some of the scattered cattle that slogged through the deep snow to get it.

  Over the months, Brekka had come to love Gerhardt and respect him for the wonderful man and father he was, but he was slightly on the reserved side. She was still a bit hesitant around him from knowing he had so disapproved of her being with Lije in their first days in Lauritzen valley. So, even though she worked around him on a regular basis, days like today, where they were side by side while the others were back handling the hay, could be somewhat awkward.

  She felt more awkward still when Gerhardt said, “Brekka, I’ve been hoping to have a chance to speak to you.” Looking up at him, she wondered if she should be worried and glanced to where Lije was at the back of the flat sleigh tossing the hay as Gerhardt cleared his throat and went on, “I know things were . . . Well, I know I was a bit . . . Brekka, what I’m trying to say to you is, I’m sorry for the way I behaved when you first came, and I thank the good Lord for you everyday. You are the best of women and you’ve made my son so much happier than he’s ever been. I’m sorry for what happened to you, but I’m ever so glad he found you and brought you here.”

  Feeling her eyes widen, she gave a hesitant smile and said, “Why, thank you, Da. I’m glad you feel that way.” Her smile widened. “Your son has made me very happy as well. I thank the Lord for him every day, too.”

  Gerhardt glanced down with a smile. “He truly is a good, good man. Yah.” He nodded his head and added, “You make a good couple.” Giving her shoulder a small pat, he turned his attention back to the team he was driving and Brekka glanced again to see that Lije was watching them, a tentative expression on his face.

 

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